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  2. tracy_j

    I think my life just turned upside down

    It is my experience that we get hyper sensitive to the outside world when we transition, expecting bad reactions and hostility. That is not to say that it does not happen, but it does often feel far worse than it is. In time I have found that I have become de-sensitised to things somewhat. It is something that we all go through to differing extents. Tracy
  3. Today
  4. http://time.com/5365725/lobster-emoji-trans-representation/ Carolyn Marie
  5. jae bear

    My first time in girl mode at work

    Oh my gosh, ha ha ha ha, I know I posted that, believe it or not it’s gotten worse! I was trying to get my workout pants off and it was impossible, I have to untie them and loosen them all the way now just to get them off my hips. Honestly it doesn’t feel like my hips are that wide, It is just that they weren’t wide at all before, just straight from the top to the bottom... One of the girls in group I go to was doing exactly what I’m doing now, she kept losing weight until she was mildly underweight, and held it there for several months, once she started eating normal and allowed herself to slowly put on a little weight she eventually achieved an extremely female shape, to see her inspires feelings of extreme jealousy! I certainly hope it works as well for me over the next few years. Hugs, Jackie
  6. Carolyn Marie

    Desperate, confused and depressed

    Welcome to Trans Pulse, Frank. I empathize with your situation, and I am so sorry that your situation is so difficult. But it will not always be so. I don't know if you have plans for college or work, but its in your best interest right now to make the best of your situation, earn some money (I know its difficult down there) and save for a better future. There may be gender therapists either in Venezuela or other South American countries that practice online therapy, and that may be an option for now. Or you may be able to emigrate in the future. Just take it one day at a time, hon. Things do change, and sometimes faster than you can imagine. In the meantime, as MaryEllen said, you are here with us, and we'll help you all we can. Best wishes. Carolyn Marie
  7. Katie_marie

    I think my life just turned upside down

    I'm having an anxiety attack. How am I supposed to go back to work knowing that they all know my wish to transition? Knowing they were eavesdropping on my conversations with my therapist? What if they try to oust me or worse? I would be lying if I said I wasn't frightened. I'm actually TERRIFIED!!! Katie
  8. Katie_marie

    Dressing with wife’s approval.....sort of

    My apologies Julie. Missed the name....
  9. ChickenLittle

    Working on name and gender change

    Feel free to pm me any time if you want help with stuff!
  10. MaryEllen

    Desperate, confused and depressed

    Hello Frank, Welcome to TransPulse. I would have to say this. If you feel that you are a male, then that's what you are. A male. I'm aware that the economic situation in Venezuela is not good so it's understandable that you cannot afford a therapist. The next best thing is to talk with us here. We have many members here who can give you advice on how to handle unsupporting parents and how to appear more manly. Feel free to ask questions. I'm sure you'll get answers. If you haven't already, join the chat here. You'll be able to chat one on one with knowledgeable trans men who can give you good advice. Good luck. MaryEllen
  11. SugarMagnolia

    Christine Hallquist Wins Dem Primary for Governor In V.T.

    Wow. That's amazing! I would imagine that the general election in November will be even tougher for her, but winning the primary is in and of itself an incredible thing.
  12. https://www.cnn.com/politics/live-news/primary-elections-results-august-14/h_cc611965245ae81556a84c730c3516aa This is wonderful and amazing. Go Christine! Carolyn Marie
  13. Hello, I am a 19 years old girl from Venezuela, since I was a little kid I've always liked to dress like a boy and play with boy's toys, I had a girlfriend during my early teenage phase, my parents (religious) got extremely mad with it but till today they haven't brought up the topic again so I assume they forgot about it. My parents tried to force me to be "girly and flirty" multiple times by buying me clothes I disliked until I turned 15 and stopped caring about that, I've always felt more comfortable dressing like a boy or "androgynous" because I dislike dresses, skirts, sandals, adjusted shirts (I don't like looking myself on the mirror and watching my boobies). Lately I have been fantasizing a lot (EVERYDAY) with being a man, even on my sexual fantasies I'm the guy, which made me wonder if I'm actually trans. I have done things like pretending I am a man online when I was younger, I have taken it too far at the point of editing my voice in calls to sound like a guy, at some times I thought I was actually a guy, It's hard to explain with words, I guess when you tell yourself a lie for too long you start believing it. I wish I could contact a gender therapist or something but: I can't afford it, the economic situation in this country is horrible. There are not gender therapists in Venezuela, the society is years behind, so even if I could afford it I can't get to one. I wish I could find out if I'm actually trans or I'm just confused (maybe because of my depression), this situation gets me terribly bad, everytime I look in the mirror I mess up with my hair to see how would I look with a short hair (my mom doesn't want me to get a haircut), I see myself as a man, I don't like looking at my sexual parts, I feel they don't belong to me and I would prefer to have a -censored- penis. I came out to my grandma and my best friend but that hasn't helped anything since I can't start doing anything to actually feel better, it's sad having to pour my sorrow on internet but I'm really desperate.
  14. AsTheCrow

    As the crow flies

    My first shave with the safety razor went great, by the way! My face has never been smoother! There is still room for improvement, but because it was my first time, I just gave it two with-the-grain passes to get the knack of it. When I feel I've got a good handle on it I'll go cross-grain on the second pass for a closer shave.
  15. Jani

    hello

    Since I've retired I try to pick up the slack wherever I can! Ha!
  16. SugarMagnolia

    hello

    And here I was thinking that the sleeping in was my task. I'm glad you covered for me, Jani!
  17. I'm about as liberal as they come, but I have no problem with responsible gun ownership for personal protection for those who choose to do so. It's not something that I personally feel the need for, but I respect those who choose to exercise that right. I do think this must seem a bit strange to our forum friends out side the USA, though. 🙂
  18. Katie_marie

    Dressing with wife’s approval.....sort of

    That’s perfect advice SugarMagnolia! Thanks!
  19. SugarMagnolia

    Dressing with wife’s approval.....sort of

    That's so great, Katie! I agree with the search idea above. I'd also suggest taking it one step further and thinking about what parts of your body to play up, not just hide. That's different for all of us, but it can sometimes be helpful in putting together outfits. Ultimately, you can't hide your body but you can play to your strengths and that will make the process a little more enjoyable. 😀 For example, I don't have much in the way of curves and would be classified as having a rectangular body shape, but I do have long trim legs and so showing those off appropriately (no short shorts or mini skirts!) is something that I can feel good about even as I work to minimize my shoulders, not draw attention to the size of my feet and provide the illusion of cleavage. I'm not sure how helpful this info is for you, but I wish you luck and joy in finding your style. It can be a lot of fun! Julie
  20. SugarMagnolia

    Working on name and gender change

    Posting this for other CA folks thinking about the same. It is quite detailed and includes examples in the appendix. I've attached the file and included the link below so people can get the latest copy in the future. https://transgenderlawcenter.org/resources/id/id-please ID_Please_FINAL_7.25.14.pdf
  21. VickySGV

    How Deadnaming factors into Police investigations

    I had the very real experience of a Trans friend telling me that some three of four days before they had been approached by a police officer asking if they knew a <Male Name> shortly after a person we both knew had been badly beaten up, but thankfully had lived without too many lingering problems. I vaguely remembered a part of our victimized friend's long ago male name but the person talking to me had never known them as anything other than Trans female. My unhurt friend did have information on suspects for the attack and went to the Police department who eventually did get the culprits but that was several months down the line. SIGH.
  22. Jani

    Working on name and gender change

    You can attach a file to PM's.
  23. Jani

    First Contact Nervousness

    Hello Jennifer and welcome. The only thing I can say it to just reach out. That's what I did. I sent a message through my therapist's website. She called me a day later. I was shocked that I had started the ball rolling and so nervous. But it was the best choice I had ever made concerning my GD. After my first appointment (in guy mode) I was so relieved, it wa like walking on air as I left the office. A therapist meeting will be confidential so you shouldn't have any fears there. Be open and honest to get the best results. BTW: Where are you moving to? Jani
  24. VickySGV

    Great News On Medical Care In My State

    I was the designated driver / escort for one of his patients who had an Orchiectomy a few months back and met Dr. Garcia and another of his colleagues who had done my friend's surgery. If they had been there 6 years ago, ---- oh well, they weren't. While I was in the waiting room, I did get to speak to another patient and family, and reportedly calmed a nerve or two. Neither the patient or their family could have afforded the medical care even going to Mexico, and they told me enough to know it would have been extremely dangerous to them to do it. I have let other people know I will go with them if they need the help as well.
  25. Yesterday
  26. Carolyn Marie

    Great News On Medical Care In My State

    Very thorough article. Thanks for posting this, Vicky. I've met Dr. Garcia and he seems like a very caring and thorough surgeon, and while many think of Cedars-Sinair as a hospital for the rich, Dr. Garcia's program accepts every kind of insurance, including Medical. Things, for now, are getting better, but not everywhere. Work still needs to be done. Carolyn Marie
  27. Jennifer Anne

    First Contact Nervousness

    I have never told anyone that I am transgender. Next month I am moving to a new home, in a new small city, in a new state. There is only one gender therapist there. I know that I need to contact her and set up an appointment but I am nervous and scared. I know that I can do this, I just need a little support to help me follow through. If anyone has any words of wisdom to help me on this journey please enlighten me.
  28. We got medical help here, and I know folks quoted in this story. https://www.usnews.com/news/healthiest-communities/articles/2018-08-13/for-transgender-patients-california-providers-offer-mexico-alternatives
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  • Posts

    • tracy_j
      It is my experience that we get hyper sensitive to the outside world when we transition, expecting bad reactions and hostility. That is not to say that it does not happen, but it does often feel far worse than it is. In time I have found that I have become de-sensitised to things somewhat. It is something that we all go through to differing extents.   Tracy
    • Carolyn Marie
      http://time.com/5365725/lobster-emoji-trans-representation/   Carolyn Marie
    • jae bear
      Oh my gosh, ha ha ha ha, I know I posted that, believe it or not it’s gotten worse!  I was trying to get my workout pants off and it was impossible, I have to untie them and loosen them all the way now just to get them off my hips. Honestly it doesn’t feel like my hips are that wide, It is just that they weren’t wide at all before, just straight from the top to the bottom...  One of the girls in group I go to was doing exactly what I’m doing now, she kept losing weight until she was mildly underweight, and held it there for several months, once she started eating normal and allowed herself to slowly put on a little weight she eventually achieved an extremely female shape, to see her inspires feelings of extreme jealousy!  I certainly hope it works as well for me over the next few years.   Hugs,  Jackie
    • Carolyn Marie
      Welcome to Trans Pulse, Frank.  I empathize with your situation, and I am so sorry that your situation is so difficult.  But it will not always be so.  I don't know if you have plans for college or work, but its in your best interest right now to make the best of your situation, earn some money (I know its difficult down there) and save for a better future.   There may be gender therapists either in Venezuela or other South American countries that practice online therapy, and that may be an option for now.  Or you may be able to emigrate in the future.  Just take it one day at a time, hon.  Things do change, and sometimes faster than you can imagine.   In the meantime, as MaryEllen said, you are here with us, and we'll help you all we can.  Best wishes.   Carolyn Marie
    • Katie_marie
      I'm having an anxiety attack. How am I supposed to go back to work knowing that they all know my wish to transition? Knowing they were eavesdropping on my conversations with my therapist? What if they try to oust me or worse? I would be lying if I said I wasn't frightened. I'm actually TERRIFIED!!!   Katie
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