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What Am I? I'm Not Sure.

New to the site?  Not sure of your identity?  You are not alone.  This is a forum without judgment.  Ask your questions without fear.

718 topics in this forum

  1. The Number One Reply, I'm Not Sure 1 2

    • 45 replies
    • 14,277 views
  2. 3 days into revelation.

    • 9 replies
    • 107 views
  3. Is this a normal part of dysphoria?

    • 3 replies
    • 68 views
    • 1 reply
    • 41 views
    • 13 replies
    • 141 views
    • 15 replies
    • 204 views
  4. I think I figured it out..

    • 5 replies
    • 94 views
  5. Well, it's really true 1 2

    • 25 replies
    • 282 views
  6. Quick question

    • 8 replies
    • 94 views
  7. Just looking for some advice

    • 4 replies
    • 80 views
  8. It started at puberty

    • 3 replies
    • 90 views
  9. The next stage?

    • 7 replies
    • 144 views
  10. New to this-but looking for something

    • 10 replies
    • 139 views
  11. How to tell who I am

    • 4 replies
    • 92 views
  12. Full transition as nonbinary?

    • 21 replies
    • 283 views
  13. Still Unsure

    • 3 replies
    • 120 views
  14. Finding myself

    • 8 replies
    • 370 views
  15. A tough situation

    • 11 replies
    • 150 views
  16. So I am confusion....

    • 4 replies
    • 84 views
  17. Help! im confused

    • 13 replies
    • 210 views
    • 4 replies
    • 129 views
  18. Progressive stages in MtF transition?

    • 11 replies
    • 194 views
  19. I am also so confused about who I am.

    • 4 replies
    • 132 views
  20. Am I valid?

    • 16 replies
    • 347 views
  21. I'm not sure what I am

    • 6 replies
    • 182 views
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  • Posts

    • Kate Carter
      Thanks for the welcome Shawna! Yes,  I go back and forth all the time on whether to keep growing it out or give up and shave it again.  By failed,  do you mean it was just too thinned out?  I got a lot of hair to come back,  but I’m not sure if it’s going to eventually grow out normally,  or stay kind of short and wispy.  A lot of people post initial excitement about new hair growth,  but you never hear from them again about results after a few years.  I take it to mean it doesn’t typically go well,  or there would be more stories of success out there besides one heavily recycled story.     Good luck with wig purchase,  I suppose the weather IS much more forgivIng for wig wear in Vermont.   Kate
    • DonnaBall
      Belle, my wife says the same thing about "listening to the world" and "Satins lies".  I can't get her to read any information about transgender as all that is from the world and all psychologists are wrong, without even reading what they say.  She wants a separation and not a divorce and that's okay with me as we are keeping our commitment to God, except it will be very costly financially.  We had a comfortable life on our income but now living separately will eat up every bit of discretionary income we had.   I am 74 so I have no plans to re-marry and she doesn't want want to take a chance on another man.  I would not want to put another woman through this either.  I envy the ladies here who have wives that are even somewhat cooperative.  When religion is important to a wife, there is no chance, and I know that my wife loves me very much as I do her, by the way she is treating me pre-separation as she prepares to find another place to live and there is much sadness that we will miss each other dearly and are clinging to each other and affectionate daily.  I hope that this will be your situation too if you do part.  At least you can look forward to being the real you.  Donna
    • Susan R
      We are lucky to have you.  You not only add to that diversity but you help continue to build our little community.   Susan R🌷
    • Tristantulaine
      Thank you all.  I have been reading through a few threads already and I like how diverse this community seems to be.  I am glad to be here with all of you!
    • Susan R
      Hello Lily, it’s nice to have you aboard.  Congrats on getting past your fear and making your first thread here describing a bit about yourself.  It wasn’t as bad as you thought was it?  Just try not to think too far ahead as it can seem more overwhelming than it really is especially in the beginning.  You can do what’s comfortable for you in small incremental steps.  You set your own timeline and your therapist can help you if you get stuck.  No one here will ever pressure you in any way and there’s no competition.  We are here to offer support in any way we can.  I think you’ll slowly find this forum to be a safe place for you to share or ask questions as you need.   Warmest Regards, Susan R🌷
    • Susan R
      Hi Michelle, this is very good news.  Sounds as though you may have found yourself a good therapist that has made you feel very comfortable about who you are.  They can make all the difference especially in the beginning when the unknown and unexpected are always right around the corner.  Counseling should be able to keep you grounded along with the other support you’ll soon be getting once you come out to a few whom you can trust.  You’re well on your way now and you can always think back on this first visit with a big smile on your face.   Thanks for sharing, Susan R🌷
    • Aidan5
      That is great news! A great first step, therapists are honestly life savers and make you think in other ways you would never had thought of, I honestly love my therapist and can tell her anything that is going through my brain, she also will tell me if I am wrong though, very reliable.    Keep us updated on your journey, I would love to hear more!
    • Aidan5
      Howdy! Welcome to the forum!! we welcome you with open arms and minds! Feel free to message me whenever if you ever need someone to talk to, or just need a friend
    • Aidan5
      Howdy Lily! We welcome you to the forum with open arms and minds!   Please feel welcome to message me if you ever need someone to talk to in private, I do my best to cheer up others and just be a friend in general
    • Susan R
      Hello Tristan, I think you are only a few steps away from starting to realize that hope.  I bet in no time you’ll read a story or two that ring true for you in so many ways.  I know I have.  Every journey is as unique as the individuals who experience them but there’s solace in the fact that others are trying to figure things out here like you are.  You’ve joined a forum that works hard to support it’s members by sharing our experiences, our knowledge and precious time.  You get what you put into the process so please join in the conversation whenever you can.  Thank you for taking the risk and putting yourself out there.  We look forward to reading more about your journey thus far and in the future.   My Best, Susan R🌷
    • Miseria
      Salutations and welcome to quote a song I like "It's not too late It's never too late" Enjoy your stay🎵
    • secondlook
      I've spent the past week on pins and needles waiting for my first therapist appointment to finally come, hoping that it would feel like a step forward, and honestly, it was pretty much exactly what I hoped it would be. Some real talk, some affirmation, and offers of guidance before I could even ask the question. I wanted to hear optimistic realism, and that's what I heard.   I keep waiting for that moment when I ask myself what the heck I'm doing and why I'm pursuing this course, and so far, it hasn't happened. I've had borderline crippling doubt about every big decision in my life, except this one.
    • Miseria
      Salutations Tristan, as someone still on their journey I can only say take your time and explore ypurself. Step by step be they leaps or bounds, baby steps or even down to a crawl... The direction is to the truest you that you can be.
    • Miseria
      Salutations and welcome Lily, hopefully you can find some peace of mind and learn of yourself as well as others... The time to grow is now bit by bit🎵
    • Willow
      Well, I suffered for years not knowing or understanding how I felt or why.  Depression, anger and periodic “needs” involving being feminine.     When things got too bad to deal with I finally sought help.  It didn’t take long for my therapist to figure me out.  I am on hrt but no plans for gcs.     like others here, could I forget who I am?  No way.  Could I stop everything that I’ve done since ?  Not likely.  But, I am not full time.  That’s because my wife of 48 years is not happy about this but I don’t desire to let things go.  Lastly, I’m not ready to come out completely.   Could I go back to being cis, not likely.  At least not without bringing back extreme depression.
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