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General Transition Issues

This is a dual-gender forum for both FtMs and MtFs. Issues discussed here affect both groups, such as the WPATH Standards of Care.


2,149 topics in this forum

  1. question about testosterone effets

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  2. Emigration from USA

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  3. Biological Woman/Man 1 2

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  4. Do You Like Your Voice? 1 2

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  5. 2pass.clinic

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  6. Newfound Joy

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  7. Phantom Genitalia?!?

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  8. Bathroooms again

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  9. Flooded with doubt after starting HRT

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  10. Exhausted and depressed

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  11. OCD Intertwined With Gender Dysphoria

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  12. Coping with the things you can't change

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  13. Friday Night Alone - Feeling Lonely and Down

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  14. Working Through Grief

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  15. People Who Don't Get Dysphoria?

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  16. Moving and Travelling as a Trans Person

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  17. Documenting 1 2

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  18. TSA question

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    • Vidanjali
      This morning I was watching my guru's daily livestream on twitch. We're watching Hindu scriptures depicted via an Indian TV show from the early oughts & Swamiji provides commentary giving spiritual insight into the events and characters in the storyline.    If you're reading this and know little to nothing about Hinduism, here's a very brief primer. Vedanta is the mystical philosophy of Hinduism. Vedanta purports that Truth is One and is spoken of in countless ways. Hindus believe God is One - absolute, indivisible & all-pervading. That Absolute is called Brahman and is also refered to as The Self. The many Hindu dieties represent various aspects of God and are meant to help the spiritual aspirant to learn, reflect, and be inspired to emulate. The demons depicted in Hindu scriptures represent various negative qualities present in the personality - impurities which the aspirant endeavors to sublimate by self-effort and surrender to God's grace.    That said, in the series we've come to the story of demons, Shumbha and Nishumbha. They represent "me" and "mine", respectively. I've heard Swamiji tell the story of Shumbha and Nishumbha many times as they also appear in the scripture devoted to worship of God as Mother & each year in October, the 9 day festival of Mother worship, called Navaratri, is celebrated at Swamiji's ashram.   Me & mine relate to ego and attachment. Today, Swamiji framed me & mine in the context of self-doubt and doubting the world. Egoism or self-doubt means you are identified with the mortal personality and body, whereas your true identity is The Divine indwelling all.   In terms of doubting the world, Swamiji humorously said, you think God got a headache one day and didn't create the right way. I found this quite fascinating, to think of mine-ness or attachment in terms of doubting the world. When you assign the label "mine" to anything, you imply that there is also "not mine". That which you call mine is dear to you; you identity with it. Conversely for not mine - at best you are indifferent about it & at worst you hate it. Such is the trap of attachment - attachment and hatred go hand in hand as you also develop hatred to some degree towards whatever you perceive as a threat to that you've identified as "mine".   Broadly speaking, the label "mine" is assigned to parts of creation. Conversely, "not mine" is assigned to other parts of creation. Every being does this all the time to some degree unless you are enlightened. And there are those who assign "mine" to parts of creation they consider acceptable, and "not mine" to parts they consider unacceptable. Certainly this is related to points of view which consider certain groups of people, including transgender people, as inferior, wrong, or evil. This is due to ignorance.   In today's message, Swamiji imparted that those free of ignorance see all of creation expressing the glory of God. God is all-pervading or omnipresent. That is easily said, but deeply profound and not so simple a point of view to attain because in so doing one must also see all seemingly adverse situations also as God's glory. This is accomplished progressively by spiritual practice - by learning, deep reflection, developing trust and faith, and constant surrender by seeing your body-mind-personality as God's instrument.   I am sharing this message as I am aware many trans folk struggle, internally and/or externally, with the idea of God having made a mistake. Here are some clips from today's livestream in case you're interested.   About "me-ness" called ahamta: https://www.twitch.tv/1391ijimaws/clip/ProtectiveBetterSpaghettiHassanChop-CycVSKmub2HU9XKJ?tt_medium=mobile_web_share&tt_content=clip   About "mine-ness" called mamata: https://www.twitch.tv/1391ijimaws/clip/FantasticBlueNostrilPeanutButterJellyTime-b3Bmo10LmukqGi_X?tt_medium=mobile_web_share&tt_content=clip   God doesn't make mistakes: https://www.twitch.tv/1391ijimaws/clip/AnimatedRelievedLadiesOMGScoots-Ojk5Y-rPndUS7AWX?tt_medium=mobile_web_share&tt_content=clip    
    • Mmindy
      Good morning @Birdie   I hope you're feeling better today. What will it take for them to understand you are an intersex person fully capable of being the woman you always were? You don't have to answer that because I know the state you live in and the troubles you face. I wish they could get over themselves and accept you for you.   Hugs,   Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
    • Ashley0616
    • April Marie
      Perhaps I'm in the minority but I generally put on light make-up unless I'm just working around the house. Foundation, darken my eye brows a bit, gel eye pencil along the bottom of my eyes (normally blue), mascara, a bit of rouge on my cheeks to add a little color and then lipstick.   Each of us is different and going with some make-up helps tamp down my dysphoria so that's the way I ride. :-)
    • Ashley0616
      Depression is gone at the moment
    • Ashley0616
      gleeful: full of glee : MERRY
    • Ashley0616
    • Ashley0616
      F1Q5ss7XsAA8BEa.jpg_large
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Yeah.  The eyeliner, foundation,  lipstick, blush, eye shadow and whatever else they sell to gullible young women gets abandoned as we get older, but it also depends on the crowd.  My wife wears makeup whenever she leaves the house, chiefly foundation that blends with her skin, hides blemishes (not that she has anything of the sort, says her dutiful mate) and probably can't really be noticed.  And lip balm.  Neither can be particularly noticed.   Yesterday we ate out and our waitress, young sweet thing, had at least eyeliner and heavy-duty lip paint, seemingly one step beyond lipstick, sort of a shiny black.  And facial piercings, which tend to freak me out.   The women at church after 40 or so are subtle in their makeup.  Some of the younger ones are more, shall we say, colorful.
    • April Marie
    • Abigail Genevieve
      I don't have the report, but there was a study on teenage suicide prevention programs.  The conclusion was interesting: telling kids that suicide was an option that they should not take caused more kids to kill themselves.  Help should be available, but over-broadcasting it apparently turns some kids suicidal.   "Real" trans kids do not need anyone to tell them they are trans.  Someone with other problems may be told that all they need to do is transition and their problem will go away, sort of like giving an appendectomy for a broken leg.  I was glad to see the detransitioning rate is as low as it is; stuff I had read indicated it was a lot higher.   I think kids should be told there are resources available but not be pushed, which apparently happens to some kids, according to the testimonies of some detransitioners.  Gender dysphoria is real but treating it is not the solution to every problem.   Someone may work out they are trans only after decades, and growing up in the wrong gender will generate comorbidities.    I think detransitioning would generate all sorts of problems, particularly if the individual transitions again (someone did this).  Physical, emotional, psychological problems.  Best to be mean and screen people as accurately as possible, which I think is being done.  Gatekeeping can be important in sorting out those who are trans from those who are, say, suffering from bipolar disorder.
    • Ivy
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      Indeed.  I also suspect that there are trans folks who may not know who they really are.   And also those who think they are, due to the increasing focus on the issue, when perhaps they might not be.  Trying to figure it out it's like trying to diagnose yourself on WebMD. 
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Woman's t shirt, women's jeans, sneakers.  No bra.  My boobies are bigger without a sports bra, but it is a Catch-22.  I fail the pencil test, so I don't technically need a bra. Bra == girl, boobs == girl.  Thinking about just breaking the barrier, accepting I look this way and cannot fight it, and buying a nice pink top and a denim skirt.  It would cause a lot of uproar that I do not want to face.    
    • Ivy
      Maybe there's a reason, just sayin'
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