Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Boyfriends


Guest shimmeringkristal

Recommended Posts

Guest shimmeringkristal

I didn't want to say anything about this earlier cause I didn't think that it was a big deal at the time but I just couldn't bring myself to think that way anymore. I broke up with my boyfriend about a 2 months ago. :( I found out that he had been cheating on me. When I confronted him about it he said "You should have seen it comming. One of my friends asked me what I ever saw in you cause you were not a true girl. I told him that I didn't know." Those words were so devistating that I just told him that it was over and to never contact me ever again. :mad: I cried myself to sleep that night and the tears didn't stop till later the next day. I felt so stupid. :banghead: How could a person like me ever be wanted or needed.

Then about a month ago I met someone in the store while doing my grocery shopping. He was nice. He struck up a conversation which ended with us exchanging phone numbers. Later in the week he called and asked if I would like to go out on a date. I accepted but was not as "committed" as I would normally would be. At about the midpoint of the date he asked me why I was being so distant. I told him about my ex. I also told him about my secret and that I would understand it if he didn't want to see me again. After I told him he did the oddest thing. He started to laugh. Not just a small laugh but a huge barrel laugh. :o He appologised saying that he wasn't laughing at me but at the situation. Then he told me that he was a closseted bi-sexual. We are now going steady and can't seem to get enough of each other's company. He is very romantic. He treats me with nothing but compassion, respect, understanding and he treats me like a lady. I just can't seem to get him out of my head. He is my first thought when I get up and the last thought when I go to bed. :D

Is this what falling in love feels like? :blush:

Link to comment
Guest Snow Angel
I found out that he had been cheating on me.

Welcome to womanhood.

Is this what falling in love feels like?

Yes and no. What you're feeling now is the initial infatuation and wanting things to be like this forever. All relationships that start out well feel like this. If you still feel like this in 1 or 2 years, that's real love.

Link to comment
Guest Mr. Fox
Yes and no. What you're feeling now is the initial infatuation and wanting things to be like this forever. All relationships that start out well feel like this. If you still feel like this in 1 or 2 years, that's real love.

I'm not sure if that is how love works for everyone. Wait, are you just talking about infatuation that lasts a while, or infatuation that lasts forever. If you meant the former, never mind, but if you meant the latter I don't think that my mother has ever felt this kind of love, and she has only had real love with my father. She, however, is cold and logical, and I think incapable of feeling strong emotions.

Link to comment
  • 3 weeks later...

Love - weither we want to admit to it or not we all want to feel it.

I'm sure we all agree that it feels like we have to test the character of the person who you are involved with when you explain your situation.

It is a hard hit that's not easy to just walk away from Shimmeringkrystal. I've had to do it over and over (being that I am in early transition I do not pass as female) - I've gotten very comfortable with telling people who are interested in me before I invest any emotions or time. I know that it will spare me a lot of set backs and hurt feelings.

YOU are worth someones time and YOU deserve to be loved, don't bet yourself up about that when your down ;). I'm happy for you - take a deep breath and step back every once in a while though to keep ur head straight.:)

I have to disagree and agree with Kelly, I disagree because everyone is different and people and situations vary so I think love is not on a "timeline." I agree because sometimes infatuation can mask itself as a feeling of love if you allow yourself to get caught up in it.

Link to comment
Guest Katie-Louise

I had a boyfriend but he didnt treat me properly so I got rid off him Ive got a vendetta against men now lol not all men but most Ive just been treated so badly by them and it will take a hell of a lot for them to gain my trust.

Link to comment
Guest raydub
...and it will take a hell of a lot for them to gain my trust.

and it sucks cause BAD guys make it harder for the NICE GUYS...sheesh!

:lol:

Ray

Link to comment
Guest Sheila

i'm not sure what true love feel like. my parents didn't love me and you have to nurture a child with love. my parents were never intimate with me, you have to raise your child with intimacey, holding them, hugging them and telling them you love them. i can't ever remember mom or dad ever once say they love me. now that i'm an adult my mom says she loves me but it's a little too late for that. so i have major intimatacy issues and will never experience true love. i do love music, i love my german shepherd dog she means more to me than you can imagine. so i'm not incapable of love. relationships sound so messed up. no one hardly ever stays together. it sounds like a heartbreak. i myself, i think i'm better off not to put myself in that position, ever. i'd like to add though, i've experienced lust, which i would often mistake for love. it is not. just thought i'd add my 2 cents on the matter.

Link to comment
Guest StrandedOutThere

Maybe. I've only been in love like 1 and a half times. The first time it was all consuming. She was all I thought about. When we looked at each other I would get that "butterflies" in the stomach feeling. I was so happy that people at work were even commenting that I was looking unusually well lately. It was crazy. I even felt like I needed less sleep in the beginning. Even now that we are not together, I still have those same feelings for her. Oh well, if it is meant to be then we'll get back together. Oh, my love life is complex...

Glad to hear you are happy! That's so awesome! Run with it and enjoy the ride!

Link to comment
Guest Drew
Maybe. I've only been in love like 1 and a half times. The first time it was all consuming. She was all I thought about. When we looked at each other I would get that "butterflies" in the stomach feeling. I was so happy that people at work were even commenting that I was looking unusually well lately. It was crazy. I even felt like I needed less sleep in the beginning. Even now that we are not together, I still have those same feelings for her. Oh well, if it is meant to be then we'll get back together. Oh, my love life is complex...

Glad to hear you are happy! That's so awesome! Run with it and enjoy the ride!

ah yes, that all consuming feeling...if you can keep that up for a long time (a little toned down however) that's love. personally, when i'm in love i'm easily distracted (not from her, from everything else :rolleyes: ) i even had an incident falling down a flight of stairs :lol: (gotta keep my eyes where they should be :P )

Stranded, i think everyone's love lives are complex...but then what do i know... i'm just a kid ;)

Link to comment
Guest J-Walker

Remember to always put YOU first!

Boys are hot and always looking for physical romance but every now and then you get someone who loves you for being you and it sounds like so far so good. The only problem that arises is that people grow at different rates. Like with your last boyfriend, you just grew up a lot quicker than he did and now he's stuck as an immature little child. You can continue to love someone forever; you just may not feel the same intimacy after a while. In this case, it sounds like both of you have a lot of growing you can do together, which is perfect for a new relationship.

Congratulations on the new man. Hold him tight or I may come and steal little Mr. Bisexual. XP

Link to comment
Guest shimmeringkristal
When we looked at each other I would get that "butterflies" in the stomach feeling.

We have gotten to know so much about eachother. There have been times that we just sat a talked for hours about everything and anything. We have talked so much that we have learned so much about each other. Lately I have been getting this feeling every time that I am around him. I feel as though every butterfly on earth has taken up residency in my stomach. Every time we go out he makes sure that I am comfortable with where we are going and what we are doing. That and he wants me to be myself. He treats me with nothing but respect as the woman that I aspire to be.

I can't wait for the weekend after this one cause he is taking me out for the weekend to a resort down by Branson Missouri. He even has me booked at a spa there. This is going to be my first vacation in almost 8 years. I am like soooo looking forward to it, especially if it is with him.

Link to comment
and it sucks cause BAD guys make it harder for the NICE GUYS...sheesh!

:lol:

Ray

Your absolutly right Ray lol. ;). But I understand where she is coming from.

Link to comment
Guest raydub

kristal, the vacation sounds like its going to be good stuff. enjoy yourself honey.. 8 year? you DESERVE a vacation.. its a bonus that youre going with this guy who sounds AMAZING. Good for you hon!!!

Your absolutly right Ray lol. ;). But I understand where she is coming from.

i understand too.. its all good.. if they are REALLY nice guys..they wont mind the little extra time it takes to win the lady's heart. :blush:

;)

Ray

Link to comment
Guest Drew

8 years?! wow! you really do deserve a vacation. enjoy yourself! this guy really does sound amazing, the ultimate gentleman.

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   2 Members, 0 Anonymous, 114 Guests (See full list)

    • Carolyn Marie
    • Abigail Genevieve
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.7k
    • Total Posts
      768.3k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,023
    • Most Online
      8,356

    Delaney
    Newest Member
    Delaney
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Dillon
      Dillon
    2. Kaylee888
      Kaylee888
    3. lily100
      lily100
      (39 years old)
    4. Luce
      Luce
      (44 years old)
    5. Luke.S
      Luke.S
  • Posts

    • Abigail Genevieve
    • violet r
      This is a question I ask myself all the time. When I'm out I hope that I can some what pass
    • violet r
      I use my  chosen name online and when ever I can. I play some online game and only go by that name. That is how everyone there know me. Yes it does feel great to be called the name you prefer. 
    • Breezy Victor
      I was ten years old when my mom walked in on me frolicking around my room dressed up in her bra, panties, and some pantyhose. I had been doing this in the privacy of my bedroom for a little while now so I had my own little stash box I kept full of different panties, bras, etc ... of hers. My mom's underwear was so easy for me to come by and she was a very attractive woman, classy, elegant. Well when she walked in on me, she looked at me with disgust and said to me... "If I wanted to run around like mommy's little girl instead of mommy's little boy, then she was going to treat me like mommy's little girl."  She left my bedroom after telling me NOT to change or get dressed or anything and returned with a few of her work skirts and blouses and such. She made me model off her outfits for her and I have to admit ... I LOVED EVERY SECOND OF IT. I felt so sexy, and feminine. And she knew I loved it.  She told me we can do this every weekend if I'd like. It would be OUR little secret. 
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      The usual social ways, of course.  Taking care of my partners and stepkids, being involved in my community.  That makes me feel good about my role.   As for physical validation and gender... probably the most euphoric experience is sex.  I grew up with my mother telling me that my flat and boyish body was strange, that my intersex anatomy was shameful, that no man would want me. So experiencing what I was told I could never have is physical proof that I'm actually worth something.  
    • KathyLauren
      <Moderator hat on>  I think that, at this point we need to get the thread back onto the topic, which is the judge's ruling on the ballot proposition.  If there is more to be said on the general principles of gendered spaces etc., please discuss them, carefully and respectfully, in separate threads. <Moderator hat off>
    • Abigail Genevieve
      People who have no understanding of transgender conditions should not be making policy for people dealing with it. Since it is such a small percentage of the population, and each individual is unique, and their circumstances are also unique, each situation needs to be worked with individually to see that the best possible solution is implemented for those involved. 
    • Abigail Genevieve
      No.  You are getting stuck on one statement and pulling it out of context.   Trans kids have rights, but so do non-trans kids.  That conflict is best worked out in the individual situation. 
    • MaeBe
      I get the concept, I believe. You're trying to state that trans kids need to or should be excluded from binary gender spaces and that you acknowledge that answers to accommodate those kids may not be found through policy. I disagree with the capability of "penetration" as being the operative delimiter in the statement, however. I contest this statement is poorly chosen at best and smacks of prejudice at worst. That it perpetuates certain stereotypes, whether that was the intent or not.   Frankly, all kids should have the right to privacy in locker rooms, regardless of gender, sexuality, or anatomy. They should also have access to exercise and activities that other kids do and allow them to socialize in those activities. The more kids are othered, extracted, or barred from the typical school day the more isolated and stigmatized they become. That's not healthy for anyone, the excluded for obvious reasons and the included for others--namely they get to be the "haves" and all that entails.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Context.  Read the context.  Good grief.
    • MaeBe
      Please don't expect people to read manifold pages of fiction to understand a post.   There was a pointed statement made, and I responded to it. The statement used the term penetration, not "dissimilar anatomy causing social discomfiture", or some other reason. It was extended as a "rule" across very different social situations as well, locker and girl's bedrooms. How that term is used in most situations is to infer sexual contact, so most readers would read that and think the statement is that we "need to keep trans girl's penises out of cis girls", which reads very closely to the idea that trans people are often portrayed as sexual predators.   I understand we can't always get all of our thoughts onto the page, but this doesn't read like an under-cooked idea or a lingual short cut.
    • Ashley0616
      I shopped online in the beginning of transition. I had great success with SHEIN and Torrid!
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Have you read the rest of what I wrote?   Please read between the lines of what I said about high school.  Go over and read my Taylor story.  Put two and two together.   That is all I will say about that.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      "I feel like I lost my husband," Lois told the therapist,"I want the man I married." Dr. Smith looked at Odie, sitting there in his men's clothing, looking awkward and embarrassed. "You have him.  This is just a part of him you did not know about. Or did not face." She turned to Odie,"Did you tear my wedding dress on our wedding night?" He admitted it.  She had a whole catalog of did-you and how-could you.  Dr. Smith encouraged her to let it all out. Thirty years of marriage.  Strange makeup in the bathroom.  The kids finding women's laundry in the laundry room. There was reconciliation. "What do we do now?" Dr. Smith said they had to work that out.  Odie began wearing women's clothing when not at work.  They visited a cross-dressers' social club but it did not appeal to them.  The bed was off limits to cross dressing.  She had limits and he could respect her limits.  Visits to relatives would be with him in men's clothing.    "You have nail polish residue," a co-worker pointed out.  Sure enough, the bottom of his left pinky nail was bright pink  His boss asked him to go home and fix it.  He did.   People were talking, he was sure, because he doubted he was anywhere as thorough as he wanted to be.  It was like something in him wanted to tell everyone what he was doing, and he was sloppy.   His boss dropped off some needed paperwork on a Saturday unexpectedly and found Odie dressed in a house dress and wig.  "What?" the boss said, shook his head, and left.  None of his business.   "People are talking," Lois said. "They are asking about this," she pointed to his denim skirt. "This seems to go past or deeper than cross dressing."   "Yes.  I guess we need some counseling."  And they went.
    • April Marie
      You look wonderful!!! A rose among the roses.
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...