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Amelia1485
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By Timber Wolf · Posted
Good morning everyone,🐝 Happy birthday Amelia1485!🎂 Hope you have a great day! Lots of love, Timber Wolf🐾 -
By Sakura Sunset · Posted
Hi This is my second post on these forums. I have had a stalker so I am going to call myself Sakura, that isn't my name, but it's ok. I have a long history of abuse from most of my family and an ex spouse, I'm also disabled. I have known I'm trans for a long time, but my family deliberately interfered in a variety of different ways, including actively sitting back while an ex with a severe mental health issue tried to kill me, having a hand slammed in a basement door untill it swole up to the point it wouldnt move as punishment, melting my back, denying me medical treatment for injuries including breaks, being told I'm worthless, being used as a slave to do labour(I know it sounds melodramatic), every moment I wasn't in the religious school they chose after finding out I was trans they forced me into the unlit basement to sort screws, nuts and bolts into containers untill bedtime, or working on the roof, or using power tools, or some other backbreaking physical labour a child who isn't even a teenager shouldnt be doing, I spent longer in there than in school, had to watch as my siblings were spoiled rotten and had everything provided to them, in contrast I had been expected to work and pay rent from about thirteen and had to pay my own way basically everywhere and was expected to do regualr work even when doctors told me I could die if I worked I was encouraged to "get off my ass and go back to work" or expected to do things I'm not supposed to do then called lazy if I didnt do them despite having able bodied siblings in the house who werent doing anything (a few things not severe enough to warrant being off work included a hernia and surgery, severe work related back injury, suspected bowel cancer which changed to a different diagnosis I cant discuss that causes my stomach to bloat like im 9 months pregnant even though I dont eat more than one meal a day and excercise every day), they tried to force me into the church to "fix me" and because they wanted me to be a priest, something I resisted as hard as I could. I really struggle with the fact I'm in my late twenties to mid thirties and haven't been able to transition yet. I worry about how long has passed, how many years I've been forced to live in a body I hate as a gender I dont identify as, how many years I've lost that are filled with nothing but pain that I can never get back, I feel like theres a clock tiking away over my head. I'm scared. Scared I'll never pass, scared because I've been battered into such an unnatural (pretending to be cis) position for so long I'm scared I'll never really fit either world. My mind turns to dark places, I've had therapy before in my past, I use coping mechanisms I was taught but ultimately it's so hard to feel... right? My parents tried to force the trans out of me, insead they just made it so I'm not comfortable dressing how I want in front of people. It's taken me two years to dress female in front of a friend for the first time and its so hard to feel comfortable, not because I dont like doing it, or im worried about what people will think but because they worked to sour it and make it feel wrong, i remember being forced to put womens clothing on while I was being laughed at as some kind of "private therapy" offered by the church. I keep expecting the deiberate ridicule they subjected me to, or the violence, or my mothers unique brand of hatred, I find my skin crawling and feel intensely vulnerable, then for one single beautiful one minute period, I was able to overcome it and it was the most natural thing in the world, I felt incredible, not because something special happened but because I actually felt comfortable, dressed like that, more than that, it felt right, but they worked so hard to sour it it never lasts long. My husband and new family help. Without them I think I would have walked away by now. I don't have much faith left in people, I want to, but bitter experience has taught me better. I hate politics, it's an excuse for people to treat each other like crud. You want the real bad guys/girls? It's the companies fanning the fighting to distract from their powergrabs/agenda and big pharma/insurance protecting their exorbitant markups by donating to the campaigns of people who agree to protect their right to profiteer off of people without regulations on the markups that can be charged to people. Life's hard, and short and unfair, too much so for me to wish harm on anyone for something out of their control like race, sex, orientation or politics. I long for a return to when people could disagree civily about a political topic and remain friends, even if they don't agree. I acknowledge some people aren't mature enough for this and its a shame. So there you have it. A little about me. Sorry if it seems to be a bit of a ramble, I never know where or how to start with introduction threads. Sakura -
By Fly2188 · Posted
That ship sailed for me years ago. I was so happy when I got rid of my last pair of mens. At first I stuck to boring plain colored panties, but lately I’ve been switching to cuter colors and prints - reds, pinks, purples, florals. I completely agree. I love opening my top drawer and seeing all my bras and panties. I still get sad seeing my undershirts and socks in there though. I’ve toyed with the idea of replacing my undershirts with camis, but am not sure they’d look right under my male work outerwear. -
By DeeDee · Posted
Gotta join the tie haters club. Have had to wear them most of my life thanks to school uniforms and ridiculous work dress codes and that feeling of being restricted around the neck just gives me the ick. -
By Carolyn Marie · Posted
I do believe your doctor is correct, Kymmie. The organization for which I am a Board member is in regular face to face contact with the VA Director (or Secretary, I don't recall if its a Cabinet post) and they're being told the same. I hope it comes sooner rather than later. Carolyn Marie -
By Drake · Posted
It's come to my attention that having an androgynous appearance is considered child gr00ming now, as is any LGBTQ material. My childhood home town made some disturbing posts about how the LGBTQ community was "forcing beliefs on others" apparently, and posted the American flag as the "real" Pride flag. I've also heard the rumors about legalizing gay marriage being rolled back too. The backlash is insane. I got tired of it and hung my Pride flag in the front apartment window. I'm not giving up, but I'm leaving my area because it is literally rated the worst place for trans people in the USA. I just live in stress now. Whenever I'm not on drugs, I'm angry. I don't know if it's me, or if it's just living in this hostile world. That's it. Not asking for advice. Not making a productive post. Just talking about the world rn. I thought we were past this. -
By Transgirlkatie · Posted
Thats really good to hear that even pills were successful in suppressing testorone. -
By Red_Lauren. · Posted
This is some thing I was thinking about the other day. Many trans people consider their first day of hrt D-day. I think many of start our transition years before with out really knowing. Because we had plans to transition, but for many reasons we never transition. I was like 25, 26 when I started buying womans clothes. A few years later. I was wearing womans clothing a lot. I figured my transition was just over the hill, but my finances just weren't there. At 31 I started growing my hair out, started playing with make up some what. Again to transition, but my ex came into the picture, so I stopped my transition goals. By the start of 2020. I still sucked at makeup, but started going out as Lauren. Then covid hit. Every thing was shut down. Mt ex didn't want to see me because of the covid. When Every thing opend back up. I resumed going out. Because of mask. I didn't have to wear make-up. Since I wasn't seeing my ex munch. I spent more and more time as lauren. The more time I spent as Lauren. The harder it was to go back. By the end of 2020. I was on hrt, but April of 21. I was full-time, and the reast is history.. -
By Davie · Posted
The Hidden Rules of Modern Society (and how democracy dies) -
By Red_Lauren. · Posted
For me they still are used to hold up my pants. I got a booty. -
By VickySGV · Posted
I have only had pills or patches and have been fine that way. I was on the pills with what my friends all claimed would be an ineffective strength for two years with no Spiro for two years before my doctor prescribed Spiro, and then, not as a T-blocker, but simply to get my blood pressure where it should be. Before the Spiro I had been crashing my Potassium levels, so really my Spiro had little or no effect on my E. It does depend on your body, but my current Endocrinologist would not have me using T-blockers if not the Blood pressure issue. My suggestion is to rely on your doctor as things hit us, and not worry too much about shortages. I was off the E for 6 months after I had a blood clot in my right leg, but did not lose anything, although I was a mess from the shock of getting the DVT but as life went on, I just kept going too. -
By Transgirlkatie · Posted
Hi, right now there is a massive shortage of depo estradiol, and pfizer won't have any batches till december assuming there's no more supply chain issues. Currently I only have 1 vial left and it might not be as effective due to improper storage during an AC failure. I switched to injections so I can do estrogen monotherapy without spiro and also because I got better results from it. I spoke to my doctor and they said this was the first time they've heard of the shortage. They said they can try and call around, but if all pharmacies run out then I will have to switch back to pills and maybe go back on spiro. For those of you who had to switch from injections back to pills what has your experiences been like? -
By KymmieL · Posted
In a nut shell that is it. I would tell myself. to search deep and hard and see that you are a girl. Kymmie -
By KymmieL · Posted
Are you a veteran? If so I would first come out to your primary care provider. They can get you going in the right direction. Kymmie -
By KymmieL · Posted
According to my GYN who is on the regulations board. They are in the public opinion phase. Unlike what they are saying. It isn't a Lets just cut people up. They have to write standards then rewrite them when problems comes up. My GYN is the director for Woman's reproductive health for the VA. I feel honored to be one of her patents. The VA is going to offer GCS both top and bottom. But just takes time. My Dr assured me. Kymmie
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