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29A YouTuber With a Wealth of INFO for MtF
By PattiCakes
in Male to Female (MtF) Discussions
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By DonkeySocks · Posted
Bri, so sorry you are hurting. I am polyamorous with a poly-capable monogamous husband. If you and your wife aren't regularly cuddling, bonding, and nurturing your intimate relationship in some way even though sexual activity as such is off the table, maybe that would be a good healthy place to start, in addition to your individual and couple therapy. Since your wife isn't experienced at polyamory, combined with your insecurity, tread extremely carefully. I'm not clear on what the difference is. To me those are the same thing. There is no one-size-fits-all polyamory. I will say this, though--if she attempts to develop new relationships and the new person or people know you're devastated (or even consistently really uncomfortable), the sensible ones, the best potential partners, the keepers, are going to be wary. Also, @Kiara is right. There's a sort of wry saying in polyamorous circles: "Relationship broken, add more people." Meaning it's a bad idea and a common first (mis)step people make. If you don't nurture yourselves and your relationship with each other, your wife is only hiding from her problems in the new relationship energy / "honeymoon" where none of the tough stuff has come up yet. I really hope it works out. -
By Skillnachchaos · Posted
I've been told I'm an intense person. It's what's scared me from being me for so long. -
By KymmieL · Posted
My thoughts exactly. I have made the effort twice. him Zero. He was mad about what I said. He called my wife and canceled the whole thing. Disappointing my wife and one of my grandsons. He was looking forward to having fun with his cousin. To elevate the whole problem, After I texted him on Tuesday, wishing him, safe travels and will see him Friday. All he would have had to do is just send me a message. saying I would you rather not come Friday. Yet, he had to go through my wife. Sending the above message. Had a discussion with my wife when one of my grandson's was napping and the other outside. She was he doesn't understand, and I don't and I live with you. He was saying that this is the way he was raised by his parents and grandparents. Yeah, I can see that my father was totally unaccepting. Maybe my wife but I don't think it was ever me. I can't remember. Heck I can barely remember what happened yesterday let along years ago. Hugs, Kymmie -
By susannah · Posted
Thank you for this topic. I really needed to see this thread. I finally accepted that I am transgender about a year ago after years of denying. However, I have not transitioned and likely not going to do so. I would very much love to start HRT and transition though. Circumstances dictate that transitioning is not possible for me. One thing is I started taking finasteride a few months ago which means I have been pushing boundaries somewhat. It is increasingly difficult to suppress my urge to start HRT. It looks like my future is quite uncertain. -
By Davie · Posted
Argentina passed a quota for employing transgender people. It could save lives, advocates say. The Trans Employment Quota requires that at least 1 percent of public sector positions go to transgender people. https://www.thelily.com/argentina-passed-a-quota-for-employing-transgender-people-it-could-save-lives-advocates-say/ -
By Vidanjali · Posted
My pleasure, @Kiara. Kohls or Burlington may be good for those types of shirts too. Kohls usually has a vast men's section so there may be some variety from which to choose. I hope you find some cool things that you feel good and comfortable wearing. I relate so much to what you said because during the pandemic I also have been freer with exploring my gender expression which is leaning more neutral with some masculine features. I'm not scheduled to return to work in person til August and I wonder what anyone might say about the change in my appearance. We shall see! I got some fresh men's Timberland shoes and boots that I plan to wear to work. I'm actually excited about that. -
By Vidanjali · Posted
I'd love to try Armenian food. I bet it's amazing. Before I departed from Russia, I purchased two cookbooks and and have since spent many years enjoying cooking Georgian (and other Russian and Caucasian) recipes from them. (Lol, Caucasian cuisine sounds funny taken out of context.) Georgians evidently are known to break out in polyphonic singing. Please enjoy this video of some Georgian men singing in an airport. I also like how they show affection for one another. One of the men dances beautifully in the video too. https://youtu.be/i4rx8NF67vY -
By Aoife · Posted
I'm so glad this has gotten the response it has! I have not had the chance to try much Georgian food, but it's one I really want. Every bit of Armenian cuisine I've had has been great, so that's a great start. -
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By Jackie C. · Posted
That was one of my first clues too. I just felt COMFORTABLE being female. Also, please respect your favorite stuffy's pronouns, unless they give you express permission to assign female pronouns, you should refer to them as, well, they/them. Stuffies have feelings too. (Obviously I'm joking about the last bit... mostly... it's good practice and in real life I stumble over they/them pronouns a LOT. I always apologize all over myself, then I drop my vigilance and it all comes crashing down again.) Hugs! -
By Jackie C. · Posted
Gorgeous comes from the inside. We're often the last ones to see it, but your spouse is right (about you being gorgeous anyway, I'm still a little salty about the other stuff). Hugs! -
By Aurora · Posted
So was just noticing and remembering that before my surgery, I really did not take care of my bottom area and just really hope that it would fall off. Pretty much why when I had testicular cancer that I really did not take care of myself down their. But now that I have my new kitty and my mind and body actually match and I feeling better about myself and doing self love that I really have been taking care of myself down there. I have been taking all sorts of pictures of it and have been looking at it in the mirror and studying it and when there is even something really small that I notice, I call my doctor and ask them about it. I am really going into details about my new area. So I guess going back that all these decades, I just did not like or feel comfortable with my part and now with how cautious I am on my current new part, I am taking care of her like crazy and I am on top of my dilation and my cleaning schedule and just know how she is feeling all together. -
By Kiara · Posted
Polyamory/ethical nonmonogamy is never going to save a marriage. If nothing else, it's only going to bring every single issue and crack in your existing relationship into a harsh and bright light. There are tons of stories of people opening up their marriages to save them only to have everything fall apart in the end. I am a polyamorous person and my husband is very monogamous. He was mostly fine with me being polyamorous and dating other people. Legally speaking, we were not married when I started dating my partner so technically he could have left me. I made some mistakes (and mistakes will happen) and he did not take it well at all. I nearly lost him and that's with our relationship being fairly stable and having no additional issues before I started seeing someone else. If your marriage is already on shaky ground and you're not comfortable with the idea then I really don't recommend attempting to open up your marriage. I second the suggestion for couples counselling before moving forward with anything like this. -
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By Kiara · Posted
Thank you! I've been dreading going shopping. I haven't been in a clothing store since before the pandemic and I've really become more comfortable expressing myself as more gender neutral/masculine. I hadn't even thought about the clothing issue until I realized the go-to for a wardrobe change would be women's cut shirts and polos and then realizing how uncomfortable I was with that idea now. I used to live in those shirts in a previous job, but that was a different environment and time in my life. There isn't an H&M store close to me, but hopefully I can find similar tops in the stores near me. I'll try to look out for the men's shirt style you mentioned too. I don't want to go too formal because no one else in my branch dresses that way. We're a pretty casual group. The two guys on staff wear graphic or solid t-shirts and jeans or cargo pants. Most of the women just wear casual feminine clothing and pants. The only exception is our current branch manager who I've never seen in anything but skirts and nice shirts or sweaters.
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