Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Obtaining Wisdom And Finding Your Core Being


Guest Elizabeth K

Recommended Posts

Guest Julie T

A good friend here on Laura's Playground said she was losing a focus in her life she wanted to regain. It is like the Jedi Knight who has lost the connection to the Force? How horrible that would be.

Heavily edited letter to her, pulling out my personal specific spiritual practices:

Hypnosis is not a word I identify with as defined by the modern world. I do recognize what is called hypnosis, it is a fully awake but sleep-like state that allows you to be accessible suggestion. To us in my belief system, it is a meditative state whereby we prepare ourselves for extended absorption of the Wisdom of the Creator.

It is accomplished, for me anyway, by getting relaxed in bed, just when the body is ready for sleep, but when you are in that state were you will not allow yourself to go under. I perform my protective and calming ritual, then I ask for wisdom. It is difficult sometimes to split your attention, using one half to call and listen, the other half to absorb and remember.

Ritual works well in accomplishing that maneuver - to keep you awake to call and listen - if you have a ritual you have performed many times - it will take much less effort. The messages will come if you super relax. It will eventually put you asleep most times, but the memory trick is to close the ritual just as you go under which is the same as opening it, and then mentally going over what is revealed quickly so you remember it when you awake later. When you awake later try to re-remember what was revealed so it is transferred into your long term memory. This can also be used for whatever you want to do in a self-hypnosis mode, and uses tools that can used for other things.

This can be done every night. I learned to do it accidentally, I think, years ago while putting myself in my woman's mind at night. Now that I am permanently there in my female mindset I don't need that anymore. I am permanently a woman in mind because I have to be living full time, 'have to be' isn't exactly the way to say it - perhaps 'I am privileged to be' - and before in male mode I once had to playact, which is gone now.

Also, what I really wanted to do is show you how to get back to what you really are. You have lost your sense of wonder and joy somewhat because the path you had to go down, as a male-like person, is alien to your mind and soul. Yo see what you truly are 'through a glass darkly' and what you do see isn't bright enough to keep you happy.

You had that happiness you now seek, as a young child. It slowly got loaded over with experiences as you grew older, life experiences you need for survival. But in our case we have to use a life experience so related to what people expect, not what we really are, we end up with depression and often a deadly apathy. So what am I talking about? That little girl in the center of your being? she needs to be allowed out.

Once you reach her again, you can work to add those life experience back on, but with her imaginary participation. Doing this may save your life, it did mine. My goodness, how do you do this?

Imagine you are like the layers of an onion. The real you is in the center. This center is when you were happy, when you were essentially that little girl, before people told you you could not be her. You peel back the layers and re-acquaint yourself with the essential you in the center.

Again it can be done by lying in bed like before. I use ritual just as protection, a way to keep out evil thoughts and influences. I then take my current age and peel back one year, thinking some of what happened in that year. Then I peel back another year, then another. When I get down to about age eight, which for me, is when I am that little girl. When I hit age three I am exactly what I am supposed to be.

I then slowly add years back on, thinking what I was really meant to be doing for each year. When I hit my age of what I am now? I have myself in such a joyous state that it just renews my will. The depression is gone.

The trick is I just know I have to make decisions and take steps to stay in this happy state.

We sometimes lose our core being, as we were actually born female in a male body. We try to make something work that is against our mindset and even our soul. It is alright by the Creator to recapture our essence, I know because I ask all the time. We transsexual are very complicated creatures.

Posting this on a Thursday morning probably dooms this piece to little or no response, but I just had to get it out,

Julie

Link to post
Guest Aylen

Great advice, Julie, I can't wait to try this! I am still learning sooooo much about who I really am ( and the fact that I tried to forget who I was inside) that everything is so new.

Sometimes I'm floating on air!!!!...for a short time anyway!

Huggs 2 u, Aylen

Link to post

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   4 Members, 0 Anonymous, 46 Guests (See full list)

    • Erica Gabriel
    • Linda Marie
    • Susan R
    • Mary Jane
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

  • Topics With Zero Replies

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      73,948
    • Total Posts
      683,254
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      8,369
    • Most Online
      8,356

    porcelain
    Newest Member
    porcelain
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    No users celebrating today
  • Posts

    • Linda Marie
      I have been posting music videos of my guitars, and Mable (my sax) just sits there weeping when do you play me? I am still just a beginner on the sax (5years). I've learned the scales and learned one song on it then the accident.  Still before the accident I was doing pretty good with it. I really love the sax.  She is very temperamental, meaning I will have to clean her up, boil the mouth piece and change the reed, a little polishing up, tune it back up and make a fool of my sax playing here. I look forward to it and so does Mable. She is getting lonely just sitting there.  LM♥️        
    • Mary Jane
      No one needs to help I really just need to get this out, sorry if this is in the wrong forum thing   Why keep living? I’m different, who would even want to be friends with me?, I know I can be a bother and why keep trying?   why keep living? I guess because of good experiences the many I’ve had, trips to the arcade I like, watching movies I love, playing games that has made life great (well while the games are good for me)   but I’m different 😔 and yet why care right? As more and more people get more competitive I can enjoy games more than others as in just enjoy it not enjoy the competition, I’m kind and this world needs more kind people, I even try to help even if I’m pretty bad at it or I’m down too, and I haven’t done it since start of last school year but I can make myself not feel sad anymore it’s mostly because I mostly look for any positives which now I’m trying to do again   Yet who wants to be friends with me? I i know I’m mostly boring plus can be a bother... but it can also be worth it to get to know me    why keep trying? That I don’t really know, things try to mentally kill me yet things try to keep making me keep going all the good like video games, movies, cartoons, everything else that’s good keeps trying to keep me going. I’m mainly trying for me but I’m happy there’s one more reason: for my best friend
    • Davie
      Thanks, Delcina    Good comments. You must be a writer yourself to say it like that. Actually, the voice of the poem is a mtf six-year-old, so his syntax is a bit taxed. My stories get supported (in a subconscious way) by my poems. This won't actually be in the story itself, but it's essential to find the right voice and poems do that. The whole thing is very early work-in-progress. cheers, David PS: It'll probably take a year to finish, if I'm lucky. That's a time lapse.
    • Teri Anne
      Looks like fun Bri enjoy yourself.
    • Timber Wolf
      Hi Claudia, Welcome to Transpulse. I'm glad you're here!   Lots of love and a big welcome hug, Timber Wolf🐾
    • Ellie Jean
      Same way I feel about my dad lol...Well, actually I can't cut him completely out of my life yet because of the half-million dollar life insurance policy my 70 year old mother has on him; it's set up to transfer over to me in the event mom dies before dad dies, so both me and mom are actively wishing for my father's death lol. (They got divorced years ago; he screwed her out of hundreds of thousands of dollars by letting the farm in Alaska she bought go into foreclosure so that she couldn't sell it. The bank owns my childhood home now and my siblings and father have all been kicked out of it. ....If I ever become independently wealthy I'm totally gonna by our old farm back. ...Lotta horrible memories there....but a lot of good ones too. 😥
    • Jackie C.
      Oh that does look nice. I need to pamper myself more.   Hugs!
    • Ellie Jean
    • Mary Jane
      Yep I've felt this even now, I don't know how I keep going or why but there's things that just won't let me give up not till I really 100% mean it and you aren't being selfish everyone's problem can't be measured and compared by the problem they can only be measured and compared by how the person feels    And remember that other post you did searching for friends? You don't need to worry about me leaving you because I give multiple chances, in fact I'm practically friends with someone that used to bully me thanks to it. There's better people to be friends with than me but I'm always an option at least   And sorry that I can't say more
    • Bri2020
      Hanging with some ladies at the beach this week before heading to Savannah this weekend. Some of us went out for Mani/Pedis. It's still a bit chilly so just wore jeans and long sleeve T-shirt. Having a blast with all of them!
    • VickySGV
      Happy RE-birth day!! 
    • VickySGV
      Welcome, come in and and take part.
    • Kimber M
      I learned a lot from it,one is love yourself.My parents learned from it as well too.They learned it was not their fault.No regrets too on coming out as well
    • claudia1
      HI all, my story is one of probable repression  and denial most of my life, followed by the flood gates opening, for no obvious reason at the time, about 3/4 years ago at my ripe old age. Then came  a  period of reflection and attempting to coming to terms with the intense feeling of being female and knowing I  preferred to be one. These feeling had been coming and going to some degree all my life, but where was it all going?  These things have a life of their own. There weren't too many choices. About one year ago, I made the decision ( or rather it  made itself) to start on hrt.  My inner life is transformed so much for the better. I have a very very supportive female partner. As we all know, on this glorious spectrum, there are many points where we can find our temporary or more permanent comfort. I have decided at this stage, for several reasons which I won't go into, not to come out socially. I go out in public as a (sort of) male. It's not an easy balance but it's what works for me at the moment.   The transition has been not without its complexities and anxieties, but with age comes the imperative to seize the moment and enjoy the future...cheers to you all, Claudia    
    • Teri Anne
      Thanks for the kind words ladies I really appreciate every one of them and everyone of you.  
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...