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Where do you get your clothes from?

Guest Sandra

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Because my body geometry favors mostly male angles, I usually have to try stuff on before I buy it.  Because of this, I usually shop in physical stores and use the fitting rooms.  When I'm shopping for women's clothing I do so in my feminine persona, so I've never been questioned, or had a problem using the ladies fitting rooms. I do order on line, but many times I'll have to return items because they either don't fit me right or they don't look as good on me as they did on the model.


So, like you Astrid, I am counting the days when stores open back up and I can once again shop in person.

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I was saddened to read that JC Penney has filed for bankruptcy, though I think it is a reorganizational thing. I buy all my jeans there in the women's department. 

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On 5/16/2020 at 4:44 AM, Astrid said:


There are some stores here whose fitting rooms are unattended (you can bring as many things to try on as you wish, and no one is there to check).  Prior to the virus shutdown, I made great use of these to find out what fit and learn how sizing varies by manufacturer, etc.  Looking forward to the day when that's possible again!



I don't think I'm brave enough to try something on in a store though. I'm my head I'd be screaming "but what if something looked in your trolley/basket in the way out?!"


One day I hope I'll be strong enough to. And one day I hope society won't be as judgemental as it is (or my head tells me it is)

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  • 4 months later...

A lot of my clothes come from Goodwill because I am one that loves to shop and hunt for a bargain.

I do buy from Torrid and Catherine"s and online at Zulilly.

Before I put on so much weight I shopped at White House/Black Market and Chico's I love their clothes.

No reason to be scared shopping for ladies clothes nobody cares what you are buying and the store wants your money.

I tell CDers do you go around looking in peoples shopping carts to see what they are buying ? Of course not.





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I order them from certain women's clothing catalogs,QVC,HSN and Shop HQ.I love the Susan Graver line including the G.I.L.I. line sold on QVC,Kate and Mallory on Shop HQ.Locally,Kohl's and a couple second hand clothing stores.These two second hand clothing stores,the owners know me well and hold on what I like for me.

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4 hours ago, Teri Anne said:

No reason to be scared shopping for ladies clothes nobody cares what you are buying and the store wants your money.


I'm...perhaps a scared little hypocrite for saying so, but I think what Teri says here is very true. I still don't have the nerve to go out in female apparel or shop for ladies clothes in person (not that physical stores are likely to have my size, even in the men's section!)


But I have recently started letting myself buy other occasional feminine products together with the rest of my shopping cart. Things like hair accessories, feminine deodorant, nail-care products, and even buying my mom's "feminine products" for her now that she's unable to do her own shopping for the time being. I make a point of never acting weird, like anything is out-of-the-ordinary. And you know what? Despite all my fears, I have yet to ever notice even so much as a raised eyebrow.


In addition to what Teri said, there's a couple other things I find help me:


1. Imagine just how much "stuff" any cashier has to scan over the course of a single shift. From all the customers they serve each and every shift. Over all the shifts they've worked in their career. They don't care what's there, it's all a blur to them. Just like the rest of us, they just want to do their thing, finish their shift and go home.


2. Even if anyone does notice anything AND might actually care (a longshot), as long as you're not acting weird, they have no reason not to assume you're just buying it for someone else. A wife, a daughter, a sister, a niece, a cousin, a friend... They don't know and they don't care. It's just scan, scan, scan, and finally go home.


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When I first started buying womens clothes in guy mode I acted like it was no big deal but a few cashiers I'm sure knew what was up and would say something like this is cute  are you sure its your size?

I would reply I hope so and they would smile and keep on ringing me up. I made friends with many sales associates in a few ladies stores and they all were very cool about a guy dressing in drag.

We became close enough we would trade clothes we didn't wear anymore.


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Macys (back when they let you try things on and I did) Target (self scan) Kohls (curbside or in store pickup). Last time at Kohls one of the thing I ordered wasn't available so did go in and buy something else from the same window as pickup and chatted with the woman who had to process both transactions so no secrecy that day. 

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When I didn't know what sizes to but I would either buy on line or buy cheap in store. In the event stuff didn't fit I could just mail it make or give it away. It worked great until I found myself, in-store, returning a $30 bra. I learned to get over myself pretty quickly.

Torrid is nice, they're friendly. I buy a lot of clothes for my wife there. They have a pair of boots I  just love but they on-line only and I'm not sure about the sizing. They have wide widths so I'll have to go in-store to try on a pair. Since I'll be trying on shoes, they'll know I'm shopping for me. I'll just have to get over myself. Maybe I'll buy another top while I'm there.



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I used to be really scared to go shopping, but I realized there is no need to be scared. The only thing that will happen is either they will look at you strange, they will ask you to leave the store, in that event you don't need to spend money there anyway. Or, and this will be more whats going to happen with the economy being crap, they will try to help you so you will spend money in their store. Remember, your money is just as valuable as anyone else's, so don't be afraid to spend it. I'm at the point where I just don't care, if I needed something I would shop completely naked. Yes I get seeing me naked is scary, but it is almost Halloween you know. Lets go with the theme shall we! Scary naked cloths shopping! Laziest costume ever! lol

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The nice thing about clothes/shoe/accessory shopping is that I was able to get a good sense of the sizes that fit me from pre-COVID days, where I could try on things in-store from all sorts of brands and sizes with no attendants to check in with (thank you, Kohl's and JC Penney).  So these days, I can get the same or similar items via mail with a much better expectation that they'll fit from the get go.  


However, I've always enjoyed the shopping experience and trying on lots of things in-store, so can't wait until that's a safe thing to do again!


Hugs to all,



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  • 2 weeks later...

I just discovered Torrid yesterday and I think I'm in love :)



On 10/8/2020 at 10:13 AM, Astrid said:

The nice thing about clothes/shoe/accessory shopping is that I was able to get a good sense of the sizes that fit me from pre-COVID days, where I could try on things in-store from all sorts of brands and sizes with no attendants to check in with (thank you, Kohl's and JC Penney).  So these days, I can get the same or similar items via mail with a much better expectation that they'll fit from the get go.  


I've been finding it's become pretty common for online sellers to have a size chart that translates their sizes into actual measurements (inches/centemeters). That's really nice, because then all you need is a fabric tape measure (or a long bit of string and a metal tape measure) and some privacy.


The only difficulty I've been finding there is that women's sizes always assume the waist to be narrower than chest and hips, but with my oversized gut and male figure it's the opposite. So it isn't always easy to know how to handle that. I guess there's maternity-land which does match my current shape, but...uuunngghhh...not sure I really feel like going that direction right now...


On 10/8/2020 at 6:05 PM, Teri Anne said:

I just love shopping no matter what kind of shopping it is.


Amen to that!

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4 hours ago, Heather Nicole said:


I just discovered Torrid yesterday and I think I'm in love :)


Love their stuff. I got a super soft hoodie from them, It’s so comfy.  

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I was going to give a snarking answer like "from my closet" but thought better of it.  I like Maurice's too.  They carry tall sizes although not many stores have them in stock now a days.  You can order online and have them delivered to the store.  



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  • 1 year later...

Hi girls

myself the only option I have at the moment is "Amazon" which I'm sure comes as no surprise is not the best.

I search for kitty heeled shoes, amazing they have my size (Size 10 uk) yes they have the colour that I want....bugger!

"This seller will not dispatch to a drop zone". It is so frustrating, it works out the same for clothes.

I did try a "Crossdresser supplier" but their prices were extortionate and the choices were limited. Why is it that if you're a crossdresser they automatically think you want to dress like a drag queen on heat with no sense of decorum.

Oh well back to the online hunt for a summer dress.

Catch you all later



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  • 4 weeks later...
On 9/24/2012 at 2:24 AM, Guest Sandra said:

So tonight I was a Walmart's doing some shopping and thought perhaps I might pick up a few female articles of clothing, but I was put off by all the people walking around and the employees. I was hoping I'd only have to deal with one person knowing-the cashier, I could live with that...but not the random people walking around at that late hour. Especially since I look very masculine and I think I stand out since I'm above average looking. Don't get me wrong, I'd love to buy clothes from better female stores, but they'd be more of a challenge than Walmart.

I know some TSs and CDs have no problem just buying whatever they want, but I cannot bear people giving me strange looks for picking up female clothing. The only way I see myself pulling it off is either with a female friend/relative who knows my feminine side and none of them do, or to simply order the clothes online but then there's the problem of improperly fitting clothes and also delivery to my address (I don't live alone).

I've also heard about buying from thrift stores-but I'm not keen on getting used female clothing, though I have seen some nice girly items there the few rare times I've been to them. Anyhow, I'm wondering how you ladies manage to acquire all your clothing so perhaps I can do the same, but I'd like to be very discreet about it.

Hot Topic is my go-to store. I don't know if you like that style of clothes, but I never get any questions or weird stares going in there. Hope this helps!!

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  • 1 month later...

So many good thoughts here! I just wanted to second (or third or fourth) that when you are out shopping you are definitely NOT as visible as you think you are. Picking out dresses in the woman's section for the first time can feel like a giant spotlight is on you and like everyone is going to stop and stare in your direction. But in reality, very likely nobody will even see you or remember that you are there. Plus even if they do and confront you you can say you are buying something for your wife lol. However I have picked up a few tips to share too!

1.) Most places allow clothes to be returned, so if you are uncomfortable lingering in the store too long, just go in and grab a variety of clothes and bring them home to try on in the safety of your bedroom. You can return everything you don't like!

2.) Thrift apps like Mercari or Facebook marketplace can help you find items for pretty cheap to be sent right to your door.

3.) Also lots of stores allow online ordering and returns as well, so you can order a variety of sizes, try them on at home, and send back what you don't like, and you don't even have to leave the house. Just make sure you don't tag tags off and you check the stores policy before committing to this, or you might end up with too many clothes. 

4.) My personal preference is to go into stores like Goodwill and just scan through everything, grabbing whatever looks good from any section, and then when it looks like nobody is around I duck into a changing room. I just pretend I'm invisible and usually I think I am.


Best of luck! 

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  • 4 weeks later...

I wasted an absurd amount of money over the years on girl clothes that eventually ended up in the trash can.  Back when I'd shop in guy-mode, there was no way I was going to walk to the dressing room holding girl clothes.  So, I'd just buy stuff and hope for the best.  But given my male body shape and the huge inconsistency in women's clothing sizes, I struck out more often than not.  I wasn't ever brave enough to go back and return anything, so I just ate the cost.


These days, I shop fully dressed as a woman, and use the dressing rooms to try some stuff on.  But I still don't try on tops because that would involve taking off my wig and shirt and probably getting foundation all over it in the process. It's simply too much to deal with in a small cramped dressing room.  So, I'm still on the "hope for the best" plan with that.


I'm also still very self conscious about my voice and rather clockable in close proximity such as at the checkout.  I usually have to work up the courage before getting in line, and hope the transaction goes smoothly without it turning into a game of 20 questions (What's your zip code, Phone #, Do you have a rewards card, Can I get an email address, etc.)

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