GRS with Marci Bowers: Support and Advice

[Guest EvaO]

Hello,

I have joined this site because I am a transsexual woman who's about to have grs with Marci Bowers. I am really excited to finally be able to take this step in my life and have worked really, super hard to get here.

Having said that, I do feel a sense of anxiety and even loneliness as I navigate through the many loopholes of my insurance coverage, the physical demands from my doctor and the myths about surgery and surgeons themselves.

While I have friends who have had grs, I don't have any who have had it done with Marci Bowers. I know some acquaintances who are former Bowers patients, but I find it really difficult to approach these people about their surgery. We're talking about a very private part of someone's body, and I don't want to just flat-out ask them embarassing questions about their personal life. Things that would make ANYONE blush -- "How long after surgery did it take you to orgasm? Does your vagina look natal? Can I see it?" etc. That's just plain rude.

Reading random forums doesn't exactly help either. Sometimes, the information you get is flat-out inaccurate, and by people who claim to have had grs with Marci Bowers and later revealed to be lying. Just the other day, I read a forum post where some so-called former Bowers patient claimed that Marci Bowers does not create a fully-formed labia minora during the one-step procedure. I emailed Robin (Marci Bower's assistant) about this and she said that claim is totally untrue.

Concerns:

My two biggest concerns are aesthetic and function. I think aesthetic is the wrong word to use here because I don't necessarily want a "pretty vagina." However, I do want to be able to see a gyneocologist who isn't my main provider and not have to worry about whether I'm going to get instantly outed because my vagina does not look natal. I want a well-formed labia minora and a vaginal opening that doesn't look like a dry tunnel sucked in by a vacuum. I also want to continue to enjoy sensation and full-out orgasms. I worry if this is too much for someone like me to ask for. My least concerns are depth and dilation, though I wouldn't necessarily care to have a vaginal depth of ony two inches or tear-inducing dilations.

Anyway, any genuine, well-intentioned feedback from former Marci Bowers patients would be very much appreciated.

I know no surgical procedure is without its risks and, as of 2013, grs is somewhat limited (mainly in that I will never be able to have children, which I've always wanted), but I might be able to relax more if I had some reassurance from other women who have gone through this arduous and somewhat exhausting procedure before me.

[VickySGV]

Hi Eva, as you can see in my signature line, I had my surgery with Dr. Bowers back in January and am now 7 months post op. I made a series of posts over in the Post Op, and Surgeries forums and from time to time to update my progress, which has had some adventures thrown into the soup. If you use our search feature for VickySGV and the dates January 10, 2013 to May 1, 2013 you will find the major items I have posted. I will tease you a bit with this link though which is something I have found VERY important for us to think about http://www.lauras-playground.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=53791&hl=, There are three of us Bower's Girls that come here with any regularity, and I happen to be the first to see this post.

I will also take this moment to welcome you to the Playground, and would like to invite you to put an introdcution over in the Introduction forum (novel idea) so you can get some more posts in and some great online friends that we really can be. When you get 5 posts on the Playground here you can use PM system, and I would be happy to talk with you in that media. Its not absolutelly required for us moderators to make the remindere to read the Terms and Conditions that you can get to from the link in the lowest right hand corner or any forum, but I just did it anyway.

I do have very realistic looking underparts, and have had some gynecological issues there already that are part of the story I have left behind. I have met some of the other Mods here IRL and they can vouch that I am a real person who has done where and what I said. Another member who is not too active was part of my "care helper team" up in San Mateo, and remembers the weather up there as darn cold the week + we were there. As I said, in the Post Op forum from Jan 11 on are my best info for you which was hot and juicy. There is also one on what not to do while dilating there.

[Guest EvaO]

Thank you, VickySGV! I have just gotten myself a soda from the fridge and am about to sit down on my couch and read all of your posts. Thank you so much for having something like this available to us on here! I will also write an introduction in the introduction forum later -- I'm kinda eagar to read about your gyenocology experiences. Thanks again for replying to the feedback!

[Guest EvaO]

I forgot to mention that I have my consultation appointment with Marci Bowers on September 30th, and if all goes well, I will be scheduling my surgery immediately after that. It's still a month and two-weeks away, but it feels like tomorrow!

[VickySGV]

I will be seeing Marci again on September 7 at the Southern Comfort Transgender Conference in Atlanta GA, but this will be just long enough to say Hi and Thank You all over again. I do get calls about every two months from them. My "adventures" were somewhat humbling, but learning curves for sure. There are others who have PMed me about things involving her, so have fun. You are not alone at all.

[Charlize]

Welcome Eva, I'm not post op and may never be but i am glad you have found us. We are here to support each other and for the most part i have found the others here to be both honest and helpful. We are all on different paths but share so much on the journey. Vicki has been great in sharing so much of her experience. it has helped me to better understand my options.

Hugs,

Charlie

[Guest Melissa~]

I will PM you with what I know when you have PM privileges (5 posts)

[Guest EvaO]

Thanks, Charlie! My experience on this site has been great so far!

[Guest EvaO]

Thanks, Melissa, I'd appreciate that!

[Guest ~Ashley~]

Hi EvaO,

I had GRS with Dr. Bowers about two months ago. Overall I'm very pleased with the results. I just had a post op followup with Dr. Bowers and Dr. Nicole earlier this week.

Aesthetic wise, I have no complaints. I'm only two months in recovery so some swelling is still present but more importantly, scarring is practically nonexistent! After my followup, Dr. B said I have very good blood flow down there so sensation should be very good when fully recovered.

And on that note, sexual sensitivity is definitely present and improving each week!

I do however, have a minor complication which I'd rather not go into here.

All in all, I'd say my recovery is taking longer than anticipated--I was in fantastic shape prior to GRS and typically bounce back from surgeries. I had fairly major FFS in January and was out and about even before my dressings came off. That being said, GRS destroyed me. Mainly due to all sorts of issues with inability to urinate as well as constipation. Dilation for the first month or so was very difficult.

I'm a Bay Area native and have met a couple acquaintances, as well as a friend, all of whom were very happy with their surgeries with Dr. Bowers prior to mine. The choice for me was pretty easy. I hope this helped and please feel free to PM me if you have any specific questions.

-A

[VickySGV]

Ashley -- Hi Sis -- My first two months were the bottom of the barrel for me too. A nice little yeast infection partly the result of the anti-biotic lube they had me get did not help anything really and made them suspicious I might have had some granulation going on, which my Ob/gyn did not find, I still have to guard against the yeast beast, but know what it is now. You are right on my schedule as far as coming back to life, so it must be a general thing that went with the territory. I went without a BM for 6 days and was afraid they would put me back in the horse pistol to get me to do it. I had reason to worry about that as Safina told me the day the packing came out.

I saw Marci at Southern Comfort Conference on September 7 while she was giving an infomercial there. It did take her a moment to remember me from 8 months at that point, but that was OK. She asked me if I had any regrets to which I told her No Way!!

[KathrynJulia]

Hi Eva and welcome to the Playground. We're very happy you've found us. Congratulations on the upcoming GRS with Dr Bowers. I know you have had a long wait and then it comes rushing at you as your day comes closer. PM Vicky if you haven't already. She is very honest and open and will answer your questions.

After you've had your surgery, please share as much or as little as you can with the membership. It's only by sharing with the community can we all benefit by picking good surgeons who give good patient care. The surgeries our community must endure are difficult ones done mostly on a one time basis to good people who don't have pockets full of money. Many of us either work our tails off saving or else we go into years of debt because we receive no help from insurance companies. Maybe someday things will get better. In the meantime, we look out for each other. Take care and good luck Eva. Kathryn