Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

choosing my gender before this life?

Guest shinyd9

Recommended Posts

Guest shinyd9

So ive heard of some doctrine in the church that says that before this life when we were spirits. Im not sure if this is even church doctrine it might just be something ive heard. However before it all we chose to be the sex that we were going to be given. Ive just been having a hard time conforming to the church when i feel that at times i want to be the sex that i supposivelly didnt choose. I have alot of doubts about the church, however ive had so many blessings and been blessed alot by the church that its hard for me to except that i may be transgender. I dont know. Im afraid to come out and be who i want to be. I dont even know if i could go to church as a female unless i was fully passable so that nobody would know. I just want to be happy but i dont know what to do.

Link to comment

I think Mormons believe you were already a male or female spirit before you were born. I don't know if they believe you chose what biological sex you were born.


Link to comment
Guest actuarylilium

I know little about the Mormon church and beliefs, so I apologise if I say anything offensive: it's not my intention :)

What I will say is that I believe God would want us to live in the way that is true to ourselves, and makes us truly happy. By happy, I don't mean just having fun by having wild parties and getting drunk everynight, etc.What I mean is such that we feel inner peace and contentment with ourselves, and how we are living life. It isn't in God's interests if we are uncomfortable with ourselves: even if he has the greatest plan in the World, we're not going to follow it properly if we're at war with ourselves inside.

Most of my best friends are Christian, and I have been to Church a couple of times with them. I know a few of the people that go there, and I really like the community - they are very nice people indeed. But I'm not a Christian, and they (apart from my best friend, and he's really accepting) don't know I'm a crossdresser. They've all been really nice to me, and helped me with my problems. But even if they weren't accepting, I would still crossdress and live true to myself.

What I'm trying to say is: Please, please don't be afraid of being transgender. It isn't evil, it isn't a sin: it's who you are. I can honestly say that if you accept being trans and let it guide everything in your life, you will be so happy and at ease with yourself :) Don't let dogma get in the way of your own well being: We obviously don't have a choice in our gender before we are born (otherwise I would probably have chosen differently...). You cannot, cannot, make yourself conform to something you're not entirely comfortable with (trust me, I have tried).

As for being Mormon: It sounds like the community has been really good to you. You should tell them about being trans, you owe it to them and yourself. But if they don't accept you, or your church won't accept you, you have to eliminate them from your life. You have to be true to yourself at all costs: even if it's painful, in the long run it's the only way you will be truly happy. If you are having doubts about your faith, you should talk to some pastors (and use the web) and try to work through these difficulties. Be opened minded about other points of view, and go with what you feel most comfortable with.

You have to be true to who you really are, otherwise life will be an utter misery. Hope this helps, I'm always here if you want to talk to me :)

Lots of Love, Lily xxx

Link to comment
  • 5 weeks later...
Guest Jenn348

The teaching is that gender is eternal, always was and always will be. However, there is also the teaching that this earth is imperfect, and sometimes our bodies don't match our spirits (mentally disabled people, cleft palates, etc).

Once a member or leader realizes that genitalia and gender characteristics are not immune from mortal imperfecton, they tend to be much more supportive.

Link to comment
  • 8 years later...

I'm definitely not Mormon or necessarily religious, but I do believe in reincarnation. 

My own viewpoint is that your soul or spirit or whatever you want to call it, goes through constant evolutions and doesn't stay the same. It's a constantly evolving thing because you can be anything or anyone. 

With that in mind, I don't think a spirit has a sex, or chooses it. A spirit is more like the essence of a person or thing, and isn't confined by the sex and gender norms we may adhere to.

But if this helps at all, I think if God made you as you are, then no one can say otherwise. And I have a feeling that Jesus would love you all the same.

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   9 Members, 0 Anonymous, 38 Guests (See full list)

    • Heather Shay
    • Charlize
    • awkward-yet-sweet
    • KathyLauren
    • April Marie
    • Karen Carey
    • kira_k
    • Jupiter
    • Kasumi63
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
    • Total Posts
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
    • Most Online

    Newest Member
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Dannie
      (63 years old)
    2. evesypeasy
      (30 years old)
    3. Katherine1745
      (70 years old)
    4. LittlestMikaelson
      (24 years old)
    5. melissaharper
      (28 years old)
  • Posts

    • Andy88
      Nattering nabobs of negativism negligently noisy.     
    • April Marie
      Perfectly stated @Marcie Jensen.   A person doesn't just go from angry to mass murderer in a day. Someone or multiple people missed signs before he acted out. Going from considering self-harm - something many if not most of us have considered because of the tremendous external and internal pressures we experience - to murdering innocent children and adults isn't a natural progression.    As I've mentioned before, our society always defaults to looking for an easy end to problems - someone or something to blame quickly so they can "solve" the problem and move on. Complex issues get a band-aid so we can get back to Starbucks and Snapchat. If Aiden had taken a knife and killed just one person would people demand knife confiscation? Would it be less of a tragedy because only one person was murdered? Of course not. Any act of violence, whether at the hands of a transgender, cisgender, nonbinary......... any act of violence is tragic and needless. The way to stop it isn't through eliminating the means, it's through addressing the root causes - inadequate mental health care, presence of tremendous societal prejudices, inadequate family structures, lack of individual accountability for actions, lack of a societal moral compass, loss of a belief in the sanctity of life....I could go on.   And, in the end, my heart breaks for the families who are suffering today because we - our politicians and our society - shed a tear and then plaster another band-aid solution over the problem.
    • Heather Shay
      Nothing plus or minus is happening.
    • Heather Shay
    • Heather Shay
    • Mirrabooka
      Thank you very much, lovely people! I'm definitely feeling warm and fuzzy from the replies. 🥰
    • kira_k
      Thank you everyone for the very warm welcome. I really appreciate it.    Kira
    • VickySGV
      There were SEVEN deaths in this event.  I realize only SIX of the SEVEN will be publicly mourned and honored, but still the 7th death happened and the mourning for that one too needs for all of us to join it. 
    • Marcie Jensen
      Some significant facts:   First, he was 28 years old. He was not a child, kid or anything other than an adult. We don't know his mental state as HIPAA laws prevent the public from finding out. Can we place some of the blame on his medial care provider? Maybe, but this too is a gray area and we have no details regarding his care and treatment regimen.   Second, he purchased the guns legally. They were NOT "given" to him. Additionally, the firearms were purchased in five different places, and Aiden/Audrey went through at least five and possibly seven background checks; one for each firearm purchased.   A third point, firearms are not toys and should never be referred to as such for any reason. Firearms are inanimate objects--tools--and have to be wielded by human beings. Granted, humans often use them for awful purpose. Let's make no mistake, Aiden/Audrey Hale was responsible for this regardless of mental state'   The entire situation is a tragedy for any number of reasons and media reporting has been confusing at best and downright misleading at worst. While the shooter may be considered a victim too, the real tragedy is for the children and their families. While the shooter and his family have my sympathy, I can't give him a pass because of gender dysphoria. There are tens of thousands of us in this country, we have each had our own trials and bad experiences and we have dealt with them without resorting to mass murder.   And as if all of this isn't enough, one of the TN delegation to congress is already raising a ruckus and railing against the trans community. With regard to the trans community as a whole, it's simply given the far right even more grounds to persecute us and our community such bad, and unwarranted, publicity that the cause of trans rights has had a huge setback.
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      As usual, the talking heads take a tiny bit of truth and twist it.  I recall Satan quoting Scripture in the New Testament in a similar fashion.    Yeah, SSRI's can have nasty side effects.  Yeah, Christians can be (and are) targeted.  But Tucker (getting difficult to say his name with the proper consonent 🙄) making those claims in this case as mere speculation and weaving together an unfounded narrative is irresponsible and dishonest.     Until now, it has seemed like MtF trans folks have been the primary target.  If Aiden was FtM, I wonder what new facet of persecution is going to show up?  
    • Andy88
    • Pacificlife1994
      So I’m AmAB been in hormones about four or five months and people look at me more than ever.I think it’s because I’m in the androgynous phase.But recently I noticed I don’t get the weird look until I open my mouth.Talk about awkward. I think some people read me as a young feminine faced guy,and some read me as a female.The other day a young boy called me a girl at the store.Any thoughts or your own experiences/funny memories?
    • Dillon
      I'm so happy for you!
    • Andy88
      I recently went to a local body piercer for my right ear. My left ear was pierced in Europe when I was 17. My parents were thrilled. I am wearing a cute pair of onyx studs. 
    • Ivy
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.


Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules


Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.


Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
  • Create New...