I have always believed that it was likely that I am intersexed

[StephanieVikingGirl]

Hi all,

I think that I have mentioned this before, but now that I have progressed this far into my transition I decided that it was time to elaborate. I was never informed of things by my family (they seemed to avoid subjects concerning my birth), but I have noticed quite a few physical anomalies indicating to me at least the likelihood of my being intersexed. I was always too afraid to look into getting my karyotype examined, but maybe some wise folk on the Playground can give me their opinion based on my physical characteristics:

1. I have Distal Hypospadias, which means that my urethra opens on the underside near the end of the penis, rather than at the actual end.

2. I had Retractile Testis, which means that when I was young I could easily put my testicles up inside myself.

3. I developed Gynocomastia at the onset of puberty, and so I may have had a head start on breast development.

4. I am way taller than anyone else in my family.

5. I have ridiculously long arms, with a way longer arm span than I am tall.

6. My legs are longer than my torso like a woman.

7. I have very little body hair, or facial hair. I plucked my beard (it was sparse), and since none of the dark hairs had roots they never grew back.

8. My pubic hair is shaped like a woman's, it always has been that way.

9. I found it very difficult to gain upper body muscles, and when I competed as a bodybuilder I was always marked off for it. Only my excellent posing made up for it. As soon as I stopped lifting heavy weights my arms went right back to being very slender.

10. I have a very feminine face, and bone structure. My boyfriend Alex is a trans man, and his bone structure is definitely, and very noticeably heavier than mine.

11. I seem to have developed unusually fast for a transsexual of my age category, with biggish boobs, and fairly nice curves for an athlete.

So okay those are eleven reasons why I believe that I am intersexed, there are probably more, but I am no expert on what to look for to know if I am intersexed, so could some of you wise folk look them over, and let me know what you think. This has been on my mind for decades, so I really want some honest opinions, and knowledgeable evaluations. Thanks to all for reading.

hugs,

Stephanie

[Drea]

You would be far from the first trans person to hold such a belief.

I would also say, from a certain point of view, all trans people are intersex. I posted on that subject a couple years ago. If one asserts that trans people's brains are structured as the gender they identify as or as a combination, doesn't that define an intersex condition?

I also tend to feel it is a somewhat normal tendency for trans folks to want to have an explanation and being intersex would be an explanation. I also feel some see it as adding more legitimacy when trying to get insurance company to pay or when explaining to others.

The list you give, I find myself scratching my head over things like being the tallest in the family and arm length both of which to me would seem to argue the reverse. Most others on the list aren't outside the realm of common. I could claim to have most of them as well.

In any case.

If you feel you are, by all means get yourself tested and find out the real story.

I see no issue if one suspects they are intersex and that helps them feel better about themselves, but I do tend to take issue with trans folks who claim it as fact when it is only suspicion.

The reason I take issue is two fold.

First is that such folks often bring it up coupled with language that basically says they are more legitimate and more valid than the mere trans folks.

The second is that many of the individuals within the trans community making this claim have essentially a fairly typical trans narrative which is very different than the typical intersex narratives. By this I mean they were born with anatomy that is fully formed and rather typical for their birth genders, haven't suffered from intersex related medical conditions, frequently been able to function normally sexually, been able to have children, etc. That the anomalies were virtually benign or ones that fall within typical variances of their birth gender.

So to me, unless one knows one is in fact intersex, that there is more than a belief, it is about respecting what is often very different narratives. Most intersex folks don't identify as trans and don't go about changing their sex.

The Intersex Society of North America answers the question of "How do I know if I have an intersex condition?" here:

http://www.isna.org/faq/conditions/know

A few things stand out in my mind.

1. Their focus is on anatomy that someone has decided isn't standard male or female and distinguishes that condition as something different than folks who identities differ than most men and women.

2. They point out that intersex people generally don't have to search for evidence. Their bodies tell the stories. They give examples. These examples aren't the sorts of things like being tall, short, body porportions, ability develop or not develop muscle. The examples given are " women who do not have ovaries, men who don’t have testes, women who have no clitoris or inner labia, people who remember multiple genital surgeries during childhood and scars in their genital area and abdomen, people who have ambiguous genitalia."

To me their focus is very different and very definitive compared to what most trans folk think about when coming to the belief they are intersex. There are certainly things that aren't so obvious such as genetic abnormality or a vestigial organ.

I had a period where I thought I was possibly intersex. I had a list perhaps similar, but as I researched it I recognized that my narrative was nothing like the sorts of intersex narratives out there and at best, if I was intersex it was pretty much in name only. I ultimately decided it made no different and it was far more stretch to see my issues relating to theirs than a more typical trans narrative.

That is my feelings on the subject.

[StephanieVikingGirl]

Hi Drea,

I agree with you that anyone who is trans is in fact intersexed, we have the brain of the sex we identify as, not the one assigned. Therefore we are intersexed. I have actually been concerned about whether I might have additional health problems from my other birth abnormalities, especially ones that I don't know about.

Thanks for the link to the Intersex Society of North America, they listed hypospadias as one of the intersex conditions, and I have that. My concern is that I might have chromosomal issues which can cause other health problems, in which case I should see if my doctor wants to test my karyotype. My list of unusual physical traits seems to indicate some form of klinefelter syndrome, but I would like other more knowledgeable opinions before bothering my doctor about it. For now I just want some additional info, and input from others with similar issues.

hugs,

Stephanie

[Guest Angelgrlsue]

I have had and still do have similar qualities to yours Stephanie, the long legs and arms, rarely any body hair, I did not start growing body hair until my 40's and even that was sparse and very light blonde. Have no adams apple to speak of and I did develop breasts at puberty, they did not grow very large though and are still a small A cup, however I did have to cover up anytime I went swimming, The only difference I have is that when I started puberty, I also began to have menstrual periods every month, this lasted up into my 40's as well when everything just stopped, menopause. It is believed from other doctors I have talked with over this experience that I might actually have been born a biological female with internal sex organs and external male genitalia. Meaning I might have been born with a uterus, ovaries, fallopian tubes and a cervix. Their is no medical proof, however their is no doubt what I experienced every month. What intersex condition would this be called? I have lived for 57 years as a female and had to act like a male for 47 of those years. I never confronted my parents when I started menstruating, for fear of being sent away or something, so I kept it to myself and cleaned myself up every month and made sure no one in the family knew. I have only recently conveyed this information to my mother when she was taking care of me after my cancer surgery this past January. She does not understand and really does not believe me, so I left it alone. Most people do not understand, even my therapist.

Susan

[Birdie]

Interesting, in my case the male junk was almost non-existent, and classified as severe micropenis. Enough to the point that I can't use a urinal or go standing up. Testicles are there, but again extremely small. Gynecomastia set in somewhere around 12ish, and I developed pretty good breasts (I am now DD pushing F).

Intersex was mentioned several times by doctors but never investigated until recently (I'm just about 60). 

My ultrasound revealed a uterus and fallopian tubes, my chromosomes however are XY. The doctor believes I was correctly gendered based off my chromosomes. I however do not believe so. I don't look like a dude, don't feel like one either. 

After decades of suspicions, "intersex" was finally added to my medical records. 

I didn't need all the testing to know actually. I knew it all my life. Kind of hard to explain but I felt something was there inside. 

Doctors really won't investigate it unless really pushed to do so. It took quite a bit of pressuring before my doctor would order the ultrasound and blood work. Had I not kept hounding him the secret would have died with me.