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Amber L.

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Hello to everyone and I hope all have a wonderful Christmas. I was wondering what feelings others have while they're dressed. For me it's like I'm a totally different person. Dressed in male mode I'm just blah. Nothing bad but just like nothing. I'm just living. But put me in feminine mode wearing pretty things and I come alive. I feel a glow deep inside me. It's a total transformation. My aditude is completely different. So positive not to mention the smile on face is so big and bright. I'm more confident in myself. I'm a different person who truely loves their life. I could go on and on how happy being Amber makes me. I always believe in living life how you want to and be who you want  to be. Hugs to everyone and Happy Holidays. Amber 

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I feel about the same way, but maybe a bit more subdued. I feel very "blah" when in the male disguise. When dressed as I'm supposed to be, I feel comfortable and whole. Or at least a lot more whole than ever before. I think that's about the best way I know to describe it. I don't have to be dressed as Carla to be me. I'm Carla no matter how I'm dressed. Although I do start feeling bothered if I have to be dressed like a man for too long. Maybe being Carla with my family helped me come to understand this.


Lots of love,

Timber Wolf?

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3 hours ago, Amber L. said:

Dressed in male mode I'm just blah. Nothing bad but just like nothing. I'm just living. But put me in feminine mode wearing pretty things and I come alive. I feel a glow deep inside me. It's a total transformation. My aditude is completely different. So positive not to mention the smile on face is so big and bright.

This describes my experience very well, Amber. I'm not full-time yet, and I've divided my life into "boy time" and "girl time." Boy time is for specific tasks and wearing men's clothing while engaging in certain activities. Girl time comes at home when I can fully express the woman inside with makeup, dresses, and the girl persona I covet. Like you, my smile changes, and I also feel like a more gentle person in the world. It's wonderful, isn't it? We're fortunate to have this experience :)



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I can tolerate going into "guy mode," but I have to know it's coming. The first thing I want to do in the morning is dress and get ready normal, but it needs a few things to happen in the background. If they don't, I've learned it's "guy mode" day so I can get the kids out the door. I don't like being "him" anymore. If I know it's coming, I'm just trying to get through long enough to get back home and be normal again. If it's sudden, I'm just in a bad mood (not sure why...maybe going from expecting to be me when I wake up to ending up being "him" instead). In guy mode, I'm highly uncomfortable and in a shell waiting until I can come back out. I'm much happier if I can spread my wings and show who I really am.

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I can't stand guy-mode. For me I came out to everyone in the world so I can be Shawnna all the time. I can't even leave the house without putting makeup on. When home I wear feminine clothes. I took my male clothes and put them into a box. I'm going to donate them. I have spent hundreds of dollars in a very short period to get my female wardrobe. I love being me and never having to hide. 





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  • 2 weeks later...

Hi Amber, Happy New Year.  Like you, I am most comfortable and very happy when in total girl mode.  There are times, however that I have to present as male.  During those times I’m always wearing woman’s cloths that pass.  Only occasionally am I relegated to just panties and bra under the male facade.


No matter what I’m happy that I am Sandra all the time.





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Eve Caillard

Hi Amber


Happy New Year! I'm like you, Dressed makes me glow - I feel alive!


Sadly I've virtually no chance of a CD life right now so it is all put away carefully and tidy. I do so miss those feelings. (It is why I have been quiet here.) One day I'll be back as Eve, but for now it is a drab life.






PS, that said, I under-dress nearly all the time now. Panties, suspenders and stockings and, when I can (most days) some nice boots, too.


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  • 4 months later...

Thats exactly how I feel, sexy, confident, still a little shy but not as shy. I am confused about all the feelings and my wife tries to tell me I am too old to start trying to transform myself. I don't think so. I have learned one thing in life, never say you would never do anything like that.

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Guest Rachel Gia

What was said here pretty much describes the relief of dressing as oneself and thankfully I can do that all the time but I dress more like your standard women from Kits in Vancouver which is jeans, a nice top and light makeup.

As a point of interest after transitioning my tastes in dressing changed drastically and I did a purging of clothes in reverse which was to give away most of the women's clothes that I did not like including forms, the only wig I had, and most of the bras.

It was a strange turn of events for me and not anticipated.


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  • 1 month later...

"Rachel Gia"...Wearing My Bra With Matching Panties Always Makes Me Feel "Girly" !

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