Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Good morning All. Coffees on.


KymmieL

Recommended Posts

  • Forum Moderator

Good morning 

 

sitting here drinking my coffee.

 

Today is Transgender Day of  Remembrance .  There are local events and on line events all over.  If you can join one.  They tend to be at 6pm.  They are in honor of all our brothers and sisters who died or were killed just because.

 

Willow

Link to comment
  • Replies 23.1k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

  • Willow

    2012

  • KymmieL

    1637

  • Mmindy

    1357

  • Ivy

    1172

Top Posters In This Topic

Posted Images

Good morning all. Had my first therapy session yesterday, went to bed with a clear head, woke up early this morning with a smile on my face for the first time in a long time, maybe ever. If that’s not confirmation of being on the right path, not sure what would be. 
 

Special thanks to all you ladies on here. Your posts have been amazing and help so much. 
 

I hope everyone has a great day. 

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Thank you Willow.  I actually have had trouble attending TGDRs as i start crying and simply can't stop.  I received a text message yesterday from an unknown # inviting me to one in our small town tonight.  I may go as so few of us are here    (that i know of) and i feel i should support the effort.  I must admit that due to the present climate of hate i made sure that the text was valid.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

 

 

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

@godonohue I’m glad your therapy session helped you so much.  Keep going, you will learn all kinds of things about yourself.  I’m glad you find us helpful that’s the whole point here.

 

@Charlize I’m happy for you having a place to go to be with others. I will be following an online gathering.  The closest such gathering I have been asked to go to is 4 hours away each way.  I can’t do that right now.  And I don’t want to get too close to others I can’t risk Covid-19.

 

on a personal note, gave myself my second DEP shot this morning.  I do believe it has has already started helping (from the first shot of course)

 

My wife talked to me last night about church.  She wants to start going again and is willing to let me be me as we go together.  Quite a change from two weeks ago when she said she didn’t see that she could ever go back because of me.  With her assent I started going 6 week’s or so ago.  This is all very difficult for her but I am doing my best to not push anything.

 

Have a great day 

 

Willow

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Trans remembrance day being I don't have any trans (or other)friends outside of this forum. I will pray for those lost to violence. Even former friends who are still around.

 

Up even earlier than normal. excited about my appointment today. MMMMMaybe? So got up showered then hopped on the board to see what is going on with my friends here.

Well, I still think my wife doesn't like the idea that I am transgender. We were watching an episode of CSI:New York. Where a trans performer was killed. (Your a guy and you kissed me now I kill you.) But my wife was really quite. almost a disgust of the show. I was sitting kinda behind her. So I didn't see her face but the rest of her body language spoke volumes.  

 

Hope to have good news later I will sure post up about my appointment.

 

Have a great day everyone.

 

Kymmie

Link to comment

Good Morning,

 

Just finished my first cup of coffee for the morning, probably will be a two cup kind of day at this rate. I know it's been a little bit since I posted on this thread but I haven't been feeling great over the last few weeks. I am trying to follow my therapist's advice and not do mood driven behavior of self isolating. Things have been okay at work, just not much going on for me, and other things seem to be lining up. I feel like I have made a lot of progress, but have hit a plateau so to speak regarding transition, waiting for the physical changes to get started, and also coming out socially and at work. So I am kind of just sitting here waiting for time to pass for things to kind of happen in the background I guess.

Link to comment

@Willow looks like we’re on the same schedule. I just did my second shot this morning too. It’s so much easier than those sublingual pills. 

 

I don’t have any trans friends either except you marvelous people. Oddly enough, I have friends with trans friends but I’ve never met any of them. 
 

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

@QuestioningAmberI am proud of you and you are brave to understand and face your demons. I understand the want of physical changes and I am a few months ahead of you on HRT and a much older body - but I am finally seeing the effects of HRT physically and although it feels wonderful - my therapist and the recent Dr. Z PHD Gender specialist YouTube mentioned to me this week - what we have is a condition that will always be with us but HRT will help A LOT but we need to learn how to accept and live with the condition. Recognition is a major step towards that goal. I seek full transition but I know that I'll never be physically what I would love and I know having had the condition 68 years - like my Aspberger step-son - he knows what it is and it will never go away - but he can live with it, embrace it, accept it and move ahead with his life. You have made amazing strides, I am extremely proud of you, I applaud you for working through the past few weeks and I'm proud to have you as a little sister>

HUGS,

Heather Shay

Link to comment

@Shay It isn't all about taking pills to magically change anything, I just have reached that plateau in the aspect that I am waiting to come out socially and at work also so I have the confidence to do so. I am not ready to start coming out socially because that would mean coming out at work since the two are closely intertwined based on my social network. I have accepted that I am trans, and feel like I have made peace with it. I know it came as a shock to my family, but they have for the most part accepted me, though I haven't really seen that yet because I simply have seen them in general.

 

A decent portion of what is going on kind of feels like it might be my lack of feeling connected with people. I don't feel like my Zoom support groups are cutting it because I don't feel like the connection for whatever reason. I am trying to figure out how much of it is mental (I can control) and how much is chemical (something I can't control). I don't feel connected to a lot of people right now in my life, and the pandemic is kind of showing those who are actual friends and who are friends of convenience.

 

Here I go rambling again ...

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

@QuestioningAmber - thank you for clarifying - I tend to be introverted - although I love playing in bands and do so as much as I can. But I also love to go in my recording studio and create - so the socializing part hasn't affected me that much. I can understand the need and desire to want to add the social transition - I do to - being in Mount Vernon (60 minutes from you) there are so many redneck types I'm afraid to dress any more than very conservative female so I don't get beat to a pulp. I was never brave enough and probably still wouldn't be to come out at work although I'm sure glad to see times changing and much acceptance. I think in about 10-20 years no one will even think twice about transitioning at work but sadly you are still in the cusp of non-acceptance. I retired from that work world that brought me an enormous amount of daily pain because I wasn't like the normal worker and couldn't relate to them nor they me - and I wasn't really part of the male or female groups. 

I am glad you voice your concerns and release some of those feelings with us but all in all I see someone who has a great head on her shoulders and is definitely equipped to weather the personal interior and external storms.

 

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Since I came out not a single problem at work. Not even a question about it. I think by now everyone is aware of it. Not even anything from my boss.  Feels good. I still have the fear though. 

 

Kymmie

Link to comment

@godonohue I'm not a lady, but I am so glad you found that peace with yourself and felt the rightness of your path anyway. I can relate to that after my first therapy session too, and it has made such a difference ever since (not that it's that long).

 

@Willow Congrats on the progress of your shots! I don't know if I'm imagining it, but your posts feel more lighthearted. Great your wife is increasingly supportive too.

 

@QuestioningAmber Ramble as much as you want and then some. We are here to listen to you and I, for one, am learning from you too

 

@KymmieL That's so great to hear! Glad for you and it gives me hope

Link to comment

@KymmieLso glad to hear work has been good to you. I still have some fear myself that something will go South with my job. I’ll worry about it when it happens  I’m too busy living right now. 

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

@Gabriel Thanks yes I am trying to be more lighthearted in most of my posts.  We all have enough negative to deal with so some attempt at pick-me-up is past due.

 

Things are going better for me right now.  I’m trying to bolster some of those that brought me back from some pretty bad depression in early September as they are experiencing some depression now.  Holidays and darkness tend to make it worse.  I know historically no matter what, Christmas has always brought on severe depression for me.  I’m hoping it will be better this year.
 

Trumps ridiculous claims about the election results are laughable.  I think he needs to seek mental health.  lol 
 

Biden’s letters to the transgender population are refreshing.  Perhaps we will finally get some recognition and help.

 

I hope if you were able, you celebrated TDOR in some manner.

 

I moved my boat today so I can take care of some maintenance items more easily and enjoy a boat ride tomorrow.  I’m not expecting enough wind to raise the sails, but who knows.

 

Hugs

 

Willow

 

 

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator
6 hours ago, ElizabethStar said:

I’m too busy living right now. 

And, So you should.

 

Well just got done with my appointment. It went good. The Dr. is going to talk to a hematologist to see what we need to do with my blood clot issues. He thinks when I took some unsupervised estrogen the dosing may have been high causing the clots. So doing my happy girl dance again.:groupwavereversed: HRT maybe coming soon to a body near you. LOL.

 

Hugs

Kymmie

Link to comment

I know it's kind of trivial but I had a dentist appointment today. They asked me if I had a physical changes or changes in medications. It's been over a year so yeah. I giggled when the hygienist asked. I listed all my meds. Three of the 4 are transition related. So as she doing her thing she starts talking to me about how woman's hormones can cause dental issues especially during pregnancy or shark week. Of course she had he hand in my mouth so I couldn't really respond to anything. When I had a free moment I told her I going by Elizabeth. She asked if Beth would be OK, explained I prefer Liz and she went back to work. I'm gonna say over the next 10 minutes (can't tell time when someone digging in your mouth with a light in your eyes) she went on and on about how much better it is now for the trans community than was years back. she was very supportive. When she was done and filling out her paperwork she made it a point to ask for a proper spelling of my name.

 

PART 2:

A few minutes later my dentist came in and immediately addressed me as Elizabeth. No questions, no comments, just affirmed who I am. He did his thing a little poking and prodding. He did make it a point though (Might be of interest) that I should, due to hormone changes, start getting cleanings ever 4 months for a while until things even out.

 

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator
1 hour ago, ElizabethStar said:

I know it's kind of trivial but I had a dentist appointment today.

That’s not trivial at all, @ElizabethStar. Those are the moments I cherish and will hopefully always remember. In a society that is just now starting to come around, it’s still a wonderful thing to be accepted. Talking openly about being trans with anyone in the general population is something that didn’t happen much back in the day. I’m happy that you had that experience at your dentist appointment.

 

Susan R?

Link to comment
2 hours ago, ElizabethStar said:

A few minutes later my dentist came in and immediately addressed me as Elizabeth. No questions, no comments, just affirmed who I am

This is so cool

Link to comment

That's great @ElizabethStar, it seems the little things can mean a lot.  We love those stories.

 

On a slightly different note, I was buzzing through the racks at Goodwill the other night when I heard someone nearby say "I don't know, I come from a place where boys are boys and girls are girls."  I've really been pushing my look lately and feeling pretty relaxed about my femininity, and I've gotten very relaxed about burning through all of the women's clothes at this store, so I think he was referring to me.  The comment didn't bother me...I just smiled under my pretty blue mask.  These people aren't going to make trouble or anything...they just don't get it.  I try to have compassion for that.  I'm not sure I get it either, but here I am, getting more womanly every day, with no desire to stop in sight.  I just wish someone would call me "miss" before apologizing...It's been a while.

Link to comment

Ann,

 

That is such a great attitude to have.  There are a lot of people out there that don't get it, so if we get upset every time we heard a comment born of ignorance, we would make ourselves crazy.   Better to just assume people don't get it because to this point in their lives, trans isn't something they haven't given much thought to.    

Link to comment
8 hours ago, Ann W said:

On a slightly different note, I was buzzing through the racks at Goodwill the other night when I heard someone nearby say "I don't know, I come from a place where boys are boys and girls are girls."  I've really been pushing my look lately and feeling pretty relaxed about my femininity, and I've gotten very relaxed about burning through all of the women's clothes at this store, so I think he was referring to me.  The comment didn't bother me...I just smiled under my pretty blue mask.  These people aren't going to make trouble or anything...they just don't get it.  I try to have compassion for that.  I'm not sure I get it either, but here I am, getting more womanly every day, with no desire to stop in sight.  I just wish someone would call me "miss" before apologizing...It's been a while.

Can you imagine how difficult their life must be living by those rules? I guess that's a rhetorical question. We already know.

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

@KymmieL that’s great news!  I can tell it makes you very happy.  Now don’t let Debbie downer get to you.

 

@ElizabethStar that’s so great about your dental visit. I haven’t exactly had that experience yet but close with my new PCP.

 

@Ann W guess we all run into someone sometimes that is like that.  You had such a great attitude about it.  So many of us would be greatly embarrassed and shrink away.  You are showing us the way.

 

Willow

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   6 Members, 0 Anonymous, 134 Guests (See full list)

    • MaryEllen
    • Abigail Genevieve
    • MaeBe
    • Petra Jane
    • RaineOnYourParade
    • KathyLauren
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.6k
    • Total Posts
      768.2k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,020
    • Most Online
      8,356

    Tami
    Newest Member
    Tami
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Bebhar
      Bebhar
      (41 years old)
    2. caelensmom
      caelensmom
      (40 years old)
    3. Jani
      Jani
      (70 years old)
    4. Jessicapitts
      Jessicapitts
      (37 years old)
    5. klb046
      klb046
      (30 years old)
  • Posts

    • April Marie
      So many things become easier when you finally turn that corner and see "you" in the mirror. Shedding the guilt, the fear, the questioning becomes possible - as does self-love - when that person looking back at you, irrespective of what you're wearing, is the real you.   I am so happy for you!! Enjoy the journey and where it leads you.
    • MaeBe
      I'm sure even the most transphobic parents would, too. What does it hurt if a child socializes outside of their family in a way that allows them to understand themselves better? I have encountered a handful of kids do the binary, non-binary, back to binary route and they got to learn about themselves. In the end, there may have been some social self-harm but kids are so darned accepting these days. And really, schools aren't policing pronouns, but the laws that are coming out are making them do so--and in turn requiring a report to a parent that may cause some form of harm to the child.   If the kid wants to lie to, or keep secrets from, their parents about their gender expressions, what does it say about the parents? Perhaps a little socialization of their thoughts will give them the personal information to have those conversations with them? So when they do want to have that conversation they can do so with some self-awareness. This isn't a parent's rights issue, it's about forcing a "moral code" onto schools that they must now enforce--in a way that doesn't appreciably assist parents or provide benefit to children.   So, a child that transitioned at 5 and now in middle/high school that is by all rights female must now go into a bathroom full of dudes? What about trans men, how will the be treated in the girl's restroom? I see a lot of fantasy predator fearmongering in this kind of comment. All a trans kid wants to do in a bathroom is to handle their bodily functions in peace. Ideally there would be no gendered restrooms or, at least, a valid option for people to choose a non-gendered restroom. However, where is the actual harm happening? A trans girl in a boy's room is going experience more harm than a girl being uncomfortable about a trans girl going into and out of a stall.   How about we teach our children that trans people aren't predators who are trying to game the system to eek out some sexual deviancy via loophole? How about we treat gender in a way that doesn't enforce the idea that girls are prey and boys are  predators? How about we teach them trans kids are just kids who want to get on with their day like everyone else?
    • Adrianna Danielle
      I hope so and glad he loves and accepts me for who I am
    • EasyE
      It is sad that we can't have more open and honest dialogue on these types of topics because there is worthy debate for sure. But instead we have become a country where the only goal is to seize political power and then legislate our particular agenda and views of morality.   Remember as you read my thoughts below, that I am transgender. OK? I am pro-trans. I am trans.   But my middle school aged daughter would be extremely uncomfortable using a school bathroom also used by a biological male, as would nearly all of her friends. That side has to be considered. It's not invalidating to a trans youth's experience to take that into account and hash out what is for the common good of as many people as possible. This is reality - one person's gender expression makes others uncomfortable, in all directions. And there is disagreement on the best way to handle these types of things.   Why can't we talk about these things openly, without the inevitable name-calling that follows, and let all sides have their input and work up suitable solutions? (I bet the kids, if left alone, would work up the best solutions)... Instead, we go straight to trying to pass laws, as if we need more of those!   And why wouldn't we want parents to know if their child has decided to change their pronouns? That's a big deal and parents are right to raise that as a concern. I certainly would want to know. Not that we need to legislate this, but I would have a hard time with school administrators who try to hide this from me. They are out of line. This is my child. Whether you like my viewpoints or not, I am the parent. Not the school.    Again, I am pro-trans. I am trans. At the same point, I recognize that validating a transgender individual's gender identity doesn't trump everything else in society. And sometimes I see that creeping into these discussions. Plus, we fight a losing battle if we have to have others' validation. We are never going to get it from everybody. Ever. Not even Jesus got it and He is God himself!   This country can be very beautiful as we each exercise our freedom to be who we are and let others do the same. But my freedom ends where yours begins and vice-versa. That requires self-sacrifice. Sometimes we have to fall back out of respect for others. Sometimes we have to let the parent be the parent even if we disagree with their politics.   My cry in the wilderness is just can we please have more open, honest dialogue where both sides try take the other's views into consideration and quit automatically going the legislative route to criminalize the other side's viewpoints.   Sorry for the rant but sometimes all of this wears me out... deep sigh... 
    • RaineOnYourParade
      Bite by bite, acrobatics in abdomen
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Yesterday when I put that shirt on I saw a woman looking back out of the mirror at me.  Usually I have looked and been very frustrated because I see a man where there should be a woman.  I was expecting to see a man wearing a woman's shirt, but it was a woman wearing a woman's shirt.   On the spectrum between intersex and trans, I am more thinking I am a lot more intersex than trans, and it is only a matter of time before my wife says "you need a bra" and then "you look like a woman!" She told me whatever I want to do is fine with her, she loves me no matter what, and I am thinking that there may be a lot more for her in this than she could possibly expect. I'm not pushing it with her.
    • Petra Jane
      We have been asked to post this study.   I'm an undergraduate university student in my third year completing a BSc in Anthropology. I'm working on my dissertation, looking at languages with grammatical gender (e.g. languages like Italian and Spanish, nouns are either masculine or feminine). I'm curious if this affects/bothers people with gender identities outside the typical binary of male and female, like non-binary or transgender identities. Using this forum, I would be very grateful if anyone could answer the 5 questions I have put together in a Google form, they are open-ended questions, and you can be as brief or detailed as you want/comfortable with! All responses will also be kept anonymous. As you can probably guess, I came to online forums because finding participants in person is difficult. Talking about gender identities, I understand, can be very personal, so this online anonymised format can be safer. :) If anyone is also particularly interested in this topic, it would be awesome to message one-on-one and do the Google form survey. Having one and one interviews would also be good research! But NONE of this is compulsory, and only if anyone is interested and doesn't mind helping me out and can do so. Institution Supervising Research Study University of Kent Web Address for Study Participation https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdS9zU_dt3RR1V8-3s_0EnDl6w-jsS6-WOZO41uWeqUP0q_YQ/viewform?usp=sf_link
    • Ashley0616
    • Ashley0616
    • Ashley0616
    • Ashley0616
      @Mia MarieI found this    Here are critical resources to help transgender seniors face the challenges of growing older - LGBTQ Nation   As far as financial aid I came up empty. :( I'm sorry. I can only imagine what you are going through. 
    • Ashley0616
      @Adrianna Daniellecongratulations to you and your boyfriend! Hopefully a future wedding in the future!   @WillowI'm sorry about that he passed away. He sounded like a role model that others should follow.   @MmindyI'm sorry about your head cold! Hopefully it won't last too long and hope for good rest and recovery. 
    • Mmindy
      Good morning Mia,   This is a great question, and I'm looking forward to the input from others.   Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
    • Mia Marie
      I see more and more postings with what the LGBTQ support organizations are doing and I see less and less about helping the older generation of us. All I really see is them wanting to help transgender youths and no matter how many times I ask for help, they tell me they can't help or they tell me the office I contacted only works with the youth only. Is there an organization that helps older transgender people? All I find when I do a search turns out with nothing more than talking about trans youths. I feel as though us older trasn folks are being left out. I applied for financial help in a form of a grant, twice, and was turned down with no explanations of why. They did ask me to help go over applications which told me I was automatically denied. Really doesn't seem fair, does it?  
    • Ivy
      Require students to use bathrooms that align with the gender they were assigned at birth Prohibit transgender girls in seventh grade or older from participating in girls sports or other girls-only activities  Ban gender-affirming health care — including surgery or hormone treatment — for transgender students under age 18, even if parents consent or the treatment is recommended by a doctor Require schools to notify parents if students change their pronouns or otherwise signal they identify as a gender other than what’s on their official student records Doesn't look like it "protects" anybody.  It actually is about restricting trans kids rights.   The ways politicians name their bills etc. is a farce.  Most of the time they do the opposite of what they're called.
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...