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KymmieL

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Nice day everyone. Looks like we hit a couple of hot button.

 

I am 72 years old.  I’ve been married to the same woman for 49 years this month.  Apparently I am a woman.  I have been all my life, in spite of fighting it and feeling it was wrong.  After all, I’m a man.  Right? Wrong! When I was young, I wished I as a girl.  That was a true statement yesterday, today and tomorrow.  Like almost all girls I have grown into a woman.  But I still wish I had been a girl.  To experience all those things I wish I could have experienced growing into the woman I have become.

 

@KymmieL your oldest may want to talk to you, but with all of his words of not understanding and not wanting you around as Kymmie, it’s going to be a whole lot harder for him to initiate such a call.  Maybe it would be better if you stopped waiting and initiate a call to him.  A friendly every day type of call and see where it goes.  It may take more than one.  But it has to start somewhere and as the parent, I’m thinking you just got elected.

 

Everyone enjoy your day.

 

Willow

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@Willow are suggesting that I be  an adult.  I don't wanna be a dult.  LOL.  I do agree with you.  I should just call. 

 

Well good  new for my weekend.  My youngest is working days. So, its Kymmie time again.  Hopefully I will be able to get to my VA appointments. I will be going as Kymmie yeah.  Hope the stupid white crap stays away. 

 

Hugs, Kymmie 

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Kymme,

 

I have to agree with Willow. Remember the neighbor on "Home Alone? As hard as it is, we have to be the ones that educate.

 

My daughters seemed good when I first came out to them, but then backed away. I had to initiate the conversation with one of them which caused the other one to come to me for much needed conversation/reconciliation.

 

Hugs,

Mike

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23 hours ago, KathyLauren said:

Four years ago today, I told the world who I am, both in person and on Facebook.  It has been the best four years of my life.  The freedom not to hide who I am removed most of the stress from my life.

That's awesome! It's always good to hear of someone elses success.

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17 hours ago, Bri2020 said:

Happy Coming out anniversary!!!!!. Today is my 9 months!

That's great! 

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I doubt I'll post here again, but thank you for this forum existing.

I've gone back to my masculine, bearded look but for having had the bit of crisis I did and having talked to people here and read the books I have I feel I've accepted the transgender community far, far more than I did before. (And I was staunchly supportive, in theory, before.)

I still present as female online in many places using 3D imagery and recently dreamed I were a woman, but I don't necessarily feel it's so much a part of my personality that I would consider myself transgender. Or, at least, to the context this forum would draw. I can't say I have a desire to dress as a woman nor to present that way in real life.

Having said that, having posted here and gotten to know the community I feel that I've come to accept transgendered people and their struggle far, far more than I had before. I wish you all well.

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Good morning everyone! Hope you all have a great day. I'm going to get personal today. I'm planning to get a vaginoplasty in the future. I have my first appointment with the surgeon at the end of July. There's an apx. 2 year waiting list, so I got registered now. I'm 68 yrs old and married for 50 yrs. My wife is in poor health. She would never have sex with me as a woman. Because of her health we haven't had intercourse for 15 yrs. I was wanting to get a penile inversion. I want to have sex as a woman does before I die. This would never happen unless my wife passes before me. I don't even like thinking about that. I love her very much. In reality though, I will probably outlive her. Any thoughts on the subject? Am I totally out of my mind? Do people even have sex at 70? Is at worth all the work to have and maintain a functional vagina?

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1 hour ago, HaraSurya said:

I doubt I'll post here again, but thank you for this forum existing.

I've gone back to my masculine, bearded look but for having had the bit of crisis I did and having talked to people here and read the books I have I feel I've accepted the transgender community far, far more than I did before. (And I was staunchly supportive, in theory, before.)

I still present as female online in many places using 3D imagery and recently dreamed I were a woman, but I don't necessarily feel it's so much a part of my personality that I would consider myself transgender. Or, at least, to the context this forum would draw. I can't say I have a desire to dress as a woman nor to present that way in real life.

Having said that, having posted here and gotten to know the community I feel that I've come to accept transgendered people and their struggle far, far more than I had before. I wish you all well.

Sorry to see you go. These are good people here. I'm sure they would welcome you back same as I would.

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@Jamie68  I am 71 and I too have been celibate for many years due to my partner's health.  I have no plans for GRS because I have no doubt that I will never have intercourse again.

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1 hour ago, LaurenA said:

@Jamie68  I am 71 and I too have been celibate for many years due to my partner's health.  I have no plans for GRS because I have no doubt that I will never have intercourse again.

Thank you for your input. I admit that chances of meeting someone and falling in love again would be remote, but I want to be able if it does happen. 

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1 hour ago, Jamie68 said:

Thank you for your input. I admit that chances of meeting someone and falling in love again would be remote, but I want to be able if it does happen. 

there are always toys.  My wife isn't sure about what we would do post vaginoplasty, she is figuring out if that's within the scope of her sexuality but like many, sex hasn't been a part of things for awhile due to a bad run of health issues for the two of us for about a 6 years.  We're finally in better health but I have no desire to use my boy parts now and she doesn't want to "get use to that again and then have it taken away.  She mentioned if she wasn't into sex with a girl that there was always adult toys for that.

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5 hours ago, Jamie68 said:

Do people even have sex at 70?

Well, I hear some do.  

As for myself, I'm 70 and certainly think about it.  Having no partner I sometimes take care of things on my own.  I've been on HRT for more than 2yrs, which has affected things.  It's different, but can be nice.  Unsurprisingly, I think of myself in a female role.

 I don't expect to get GCS for financial reasons and my age.  But If I were to find a suitable partner I would make the best of things.

 

Hope this is not TMI

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@HaraSurya While I am sorry to see you go I am happy that you have learned something by being here and have determined the path forward for you.  All my best. 

 

Jani 

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1 hour ago, Bri2020 said:

there are always toys.  My wife isn't sure about what we would do post vaginoplasty, she is figuring out if that's within the scope of her sexuality but like many, sex hasn't been a part of things for awhile due to a bad run of health issues for the two of us for about a 6 years.  We're finally in better health but I have no desire to use my boy parts now and she doesn't want to "get use to that again and then have it taken away.  She mentioned if she wasn't into sex with a girl that there was always adult toys for that.

Thanks. I'm in good health and plan to be that way for a long time. I have a lot of LIVING left in my life and want to make the most of it. I'm glad I'm not the only one. 

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1 hour ago, Jandi said:

Well, I hear some do.  

As for myself, I'm 70 and certainly think about it.  Having no partner I sometimes take care of things on my own.  I've been on HRT for more than 2yrs, which has affected things.  It's different, but can be nice.  Unsurprisingly, I think of myself in a female role.

 I don't expect to get GCS for financial reasons and my age.  But If I were to find a suitable partner I would make the best of things.

 

Hope this is not TMI

Thank you. I've been taking matters into my own hands so to speak for a long time now. Now that I've been on herbal and now medical HRT for about 8 months, the desire for that type of sex has gone away and a whole new type of sexual desire has replaced it. 

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Good morning everyone.

 

@Jamie68 I think you need to do what you feel is necessary to make you happy. I know my wife will also have to make adjustments to the idea when I do bottom surgery. It will be a major adjustment for the both of us. Intimacy is an interesting topic I think when we have partners. There are adjustments required on both parts I imagine post bottom surgery.

 

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1 hour ago, AmberM said:

 

Good morning everyone.

 

@Jamie68 I think you need to do what you feel is necessary to make you happy. I know my wife will also have to make adjustments to the idea when I do bottom surgery. It will be a major adjustment for the both of us. Intimacy is an interesting topic I think when we have partners. There are adjustments required on both parts I imagine post bottom surgery.

 

I agree. Thanks 

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Congrats Kathy. You are now 4 years old!!! That is a slang thing in my world for how many years out now.

That makes me 21, gosh I will never forget coming out, never been so scared in my life and yet so relieved. 

LM

 

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12 hours ago, Jamie68 said:

Do people even have sex at 70?

 

I hope so. Also, STD statistics in nursing homes point to yes.

 

12 hours ago, Jamie68 said:

Is at worth all the work to have and maintain a functional vagina?

 

In my opinion, yes. I rather enjoy the new accessory.

 

There is certainly a learning curve though. Both for me and my partner. I think I've got a handle on things, but I've always been a quick study.

 

Hugs!

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8 hours ago, Jackie C. said:

 

I hope so. Also, STD statistics in nursing homes point to yes.

 

 

In my opinion, yes. I rather enjoy the new accessory.

 

There is certainly a learning curve though. Both for me and my partner. I think I've got a handle on things, but I've always been a quick study.

 

Hugs!

Thanks. I appreciate all the input this group gives 

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After having a breakdown with my therapist about my care team things seem to be changing.  Among other things, I felt like my endocrinologist only cared about whether E #s were "within therapeutic range" and not interested in whether they were making changes to my body. She hadn't responded to my concerns /inquiry about changing the regimen to get better results.  He made an appointment for me to get a second opinion on the spot and then later that day, low and behold, my endo messaged me a simple message "I ordered you progesterone, you can pick it up at the pharmacy". No discussion or explanation of the change or talk about what it will do, side effects, things to look for or anything.  I think she just got the word I wasn't happy and ordered P to "make me happy".   I'm obviously happy for the change but still not happy with her so I'm going to keep the second opinion appointment and see if I like him better.  So tonight starts my journey with Progesterone.  I hope it kick starts some breast developments/fat redistribution. I would rather not get a BA if I don't have to.  I hear weight gain is common so I have to kick into exercise mode and not eat a whole tub of cookies like last night ;)

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1 hour ago, Bri2020 said:

After having a breakdown with my therapist about my care team things seem to be changing.  Among other things, I felt like my endocrinologist only cared about whether E #s were "within therapeutic range" and not interested in whether they were making changes to my body. She hadn't responded to my concerns /inquiry about changing the regimen to get better results.  He made an appointment for me to get a second opinion on the spot and then later that day, low and behold, my endo messaged me a simple message "I ordered you progesterone, you can pick it up at the pharmacy". No discussion or explanation of the change or talk about what it will do, side effects, things to look for or anything.  I think she just got the word I wasn't happy and ordered P to "make me happy".   I'm obviously happy for the change but still not happy with her so I'm going to keep the second opinion appointment and see if I like him better. 

The one thing I advise everyone when it comes to medical care " You have a say" and you need to advocate for yourself.  I used to be an RN and I can tell you, "the squeaky wheel does get attention". You know your body and if you aren't happy with your care- push for better care. This goes for things outside of transgender care too.

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Good morning everyone, happy Thursday.

 

@Bri2020 I agree with you that we have to be our own advocates, which can be really hard at times.

 

I am now closing in on the one week away form coming out at work, and I am both nervous and excited. I think it is going to be really liberating when I remove the mantle of being the old me, and instead just be me.

 

My wife talked to one of my aunts yesterday, and she still isn’t fully on board. She sounds like she is going to take some time if and when she finally gets to a point of acceptance. She did have an odd opinion that I don’t agree with, she thinks I should tell my grandmother, even though she has fairly far progressed dementia. My aunt is considering it unfair that I don’t tell her, but I don’t want to trigger a reaction that makes my grandmother worse by upsetting her and causing an outburst. Not to mention, what is the likeliness that she is going to remember it between times that I talk to her?

 

Just a couple of things on my mind today. Hope you all have a manageable day ?

 

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  • Forum Moderator

Morning everyone.

 

Sorry to say things have gone south again with my wife. Last night she had taken her bath, starting at 10:45. She does this 95% of the time and gets up at aprox 5am. then she complains about being tired. Lets get back on topic.

 

I jump on the computer while she is bathing. I hear the tub drain. I finish up the story I was reading. a couple minutes later I hear, Tim/Kym (not sure which) are you coming up to bed."in an angry tone.  I finish that last paragraph. then head up stairs. I go in to tell her I will be right in just need to brush and potty.

 

Her "Do you hide in the back at work all the time?"

Me,"no, what are you talking about?"

Her, "Well a friend of ours has been in your store many times and haven't seen you."

Me, "Maybe I was at lunch or something."

Her, "I've had other friends go in and didn't see you. But your shirt says Kym(Kymbrill) not Tim. How do I explain? I still don't understand"

Me, (???)

Her, "So have you been on match?"

Me, "What?"

Her, "Looking for someone more transgender friendly?"

Me, "No, what makes you think that?"

Her, "It is on your old computer."

Me, "No, All I want is you." I go in for a kiss. She hides away. SO I do my brush and potty and take off my finger nail polish. I climb into bed. She doesn't say a word. I don't even try a cuddle. Figuring I would be rejected anyway. So, I put on my C-pap and go to sleep.

 

This morning as she is getting herself ready to head to the bathroom to changed etc. I say. I love you. nothing back. I am sure we will have an interesting therapy session this afternoon.

 

Kymmie

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