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Good morning All. Coffees on.


KymmieL

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7 hours ago, AgnesBardsie said:

Wow! Y’all are a bunch of gearheads! Hahahaha! I basically know how to change the oil!

Thanks @AgnesBardsie, I thought I was the only one! I read those posts about cars like I was reading Vietnamese - totally clueless :)

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1 hour ago, Beatriz said:

Thanks @AgnesBardsie, I thought I was the only one! I read those posts about cars like I was reading Vietnamese - totally clueless :)

 

Oh gosh no. You know the cars I've had? Two blue ones and a black one.

 

Hugs!

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Liz, I'm sorry the work function sucked. That's not the case everywhere though. It's all about company culture.  My staff is always begging for a "staff bonding event"  Yea, they work with each other every day but they actually want to do something together outside of work.  I pitched in for a couple of tables at a local brewery that's having a band play there this Saturday so the crew can have fun together.  I use these events to foster that camaraderie.  We do something like that 2-3 times a year.  

 

Alice- way to f3##*ing go! I love your bravery putting yourself out there and helping to educate.

 

Cars; I'm not a gearhead but I've managed to own 23 vehicles at this point.  None were spectacular but they all hold a place in my heart.  I fondly remember my 77 toyota celica GT liftback in all black and black louvers over the rear window. I thought it was the coolest car when I was 17.  these pics weren't mine but it looked just like them.

1977_toyota_celica_gt_liftback-pic-8838468848342336127-640x480.jpeg

gt liftback.jpeg

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So I am struggling to type today because I went and got a full set of acrylic /gel nails done and I can't figure out how to type with them. lol.  I'm making about 4-5 typos per sentence. hahaha. But I love them and may never go back to short nails.  I did this because I've always had to have really short nails from my nursing days and then as a massage therapist so anytime I try and grow them out it felt so wrong I would bite or peal them off and then they looked like shite.  There's no picking at these things though. They are heavy duty :)

I love the midnight blue metallic, it can change from almost black to the blue to even a purple color depending on the lighting.

IMG_1505.JPG

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I just wrote them all down. Total I have had 50. Including 11 white, 9 blue, 7 green, 5 maroon,  4 silver,3 ea in tan, black.  2 ea gold and brown, one each in red, orange,yellow, and gray.

 

That list doesn't include the 4 Harleys, a Honda 3 wheeler. ATC and a 80cc 4 wheeler. 

 

Kymmie 

 

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@Jani thanks for the correction to my post. Unfortunately I didn’t go back and proof read before hitting submit and it is unpredictable what Apple decides on your behalf what you meant to say and changes for you.

 

@KymmieL  AUNT!  I couldn’t very well cry UNCLE could I?  I think you win the gear head award.  I learned about cars and motorcycles with a part-time job in a shop when I was in high school.  In the winter we plowed snow.  Up until now I’ve done all my own repairs and maintenance but I think I’m done now.  Done want to break a nail.

 

got my Jeep back.  They replaced the main O2 sensor.  Kind of like the code suggested.  Guess I see over the next two days if it’s really fixed.  My trailer is loaded and ready to go.  I do have a few things to put in the back of the car.

 

calling it a night.  I may not be on her for a few days.

 

take care

 

Willow

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4 hours ago, Bri2020 said:

So I am struggling to type today because I went and got a full set of acrylic /gel nails done and I can't figure out how to type with them. lol. 

 

This is the dilemma of all of us who like to play keyboard instruments.  So I can have all the colors I want, but not the length....otherwise, I'm skating all over the keys and making click-clack sounds on the audio track ? ?  ?

 

Astrid

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Good too-early morning. 4:20 a.m. Can't sleep much tonight/morning. I'm doing OK but sometimes life overwhelms me when I'm not looking. Thanks for being here.

Yours,

Davie

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"Ran into" my therapist on a support zoom last month so decided to visit her for the first time since September. I basically wanted to update her on how much happier I am and also discuss how to try to convince my wife to seek some help. But right before I left Mrs tells me she's got an appointment for such help. 

 

So instead it was just a nice little visit, had a lot of things to catch up on. 

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I know it is summer time, but the heat and humidity, especially the humidity is no fun.  It's been like a sauna here for over a week.  The weather guessers do say relief is coming soon - can't wait, even if only temporary.

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12 hours ago, Bri2020 said:

Liz, I'm sorry the work function sucked. That's not the case everywhere though. It's all about company culture.  My staff is always begging for a "staff bonding event"  Yea, they work with each other every day but they actually want to do something together outside of work.  I pitched in for a couple of tables at a local brewery that's having a band play there this Saturday so the crew can have fun together.  I use these events to foster that camaraderie.  We do something like that 2-3 times a year.  

 

Alice- way to f3##*ing go! I love your bravery putting yourself out there and helping to educate.

 

Cars; I'm not a gearhead but I've managed to own 23 vehicles at this point.  None were spectacular but they all hold a place in my heart.  I fondly remember my 77 toyota celica GT liftback in all black and black louvers over the rear window. I thought it was the coolest car when I was 17.  these pics weren't mine but it looked just like them.

1977_toyota_celica_gt_liftback-pic-8838468848342336127-640x480.jpeg

gt liftback.jpeg

I had an orange one. It wasn't much but could run with the Mustang 2s. It was the first car I replaced a clutch in. I'm not sure what ever happened to it, probably involved a last ride on a tow truck.

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I’m sure that, statistically, we make up a rather small part of the population. I believe this is especially true of transgender children. Despite this, it feels as though I helped every transgender child in Colorado last weekend at our Renaissance Faire clothing shop. I’m starting to think the word has spread that there’s a trans woman working there and that we are LGBTQ embracing. 

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So the last few days have been an emotional struggle. Not sure why. Someone at work suggested it may be my HRT meds. I've been on them for 19 months so that statement angers me a bit. Maybe I'm just tired of everyone's crap and the double standards. Anyways, I'm doing better today. I have to take my wife in for some medical testing. Hopefully all will go well and in a couple days we'll know if she'll be able to get an Intrathecal Pain Pump to help manage her Arachnoiditis. She also finally found whatever she needed in herself to quit smoking. I've been begging her for over 3 years due to health and financial reasons but mostly health.

 

I've managed to make a couple of good friends (both trans) in the last few months. One lives halfway across the country but we text all the time and zoom once a week. The other is local-ish. I won't be far from her today and I'll be sitting with nothing to do for a few hours so I'm gonna see if she wants to meet for coffee.

 

 

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1 hour ago, Erica Gabriel said:

I’m sure that, statistically, we make up a rather small part of the population. I believe this is especially true of transgender children. Despite this, it feels as though I helped every transgender child in Colorado last weekend at our Renaissance Faire clothing shop. I’m starting to think the word has spread that there’s a trans woman working there and that we are LGBTQ embracing. 

❤️

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14 hours ago, Bri2020 said:

I pitched in for a couple of tables at a local brewery that's having a band play there this Saturday so the crew can have fun together.  I use these events to foster that camaraderie.  We do something like that 2-3 times a year. 

 

See now THAT actually sounds like fun. Every work function I've ever been to was more like, "Catered food (maybe) and listen to the CEO talk about how great the company/he in particular is." No thanks.

 

Though lately it's been more, "Try and find a spot in your work day (hint: you can't) to come grab some of the food in the break room." Oh, and "spirit week." I mean seriously? My work uniform is SAFETY GEAR. You want me to dress funny instead? Idiots. I work for idiots.

 

Hugs!

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Yesterday I had electrolysis for the first time since I had to cancel on her last minute because of my mental breakdown.  I was really nervous because I knew she would want to know what happened (out of true concern) and bring that up plus the pain factor I was pretty convinced we would have to stop the session due to a serious crying spell.  Turns out it was an amazing session. The physical pain was familiar and I knew how to deal with it so it distracted me and kept me from dwelling on the negative emotions.  I swear, my electrolysis woman is a far better therapist than my actual therapist. I had a session with him the other day and all he could say is "you need to work on acceptance" and sent me reading suggestions.  WTactual F.  Maureen (electrolysist) actually talked me through stuff and helped me see different ways to approach things.  I might have to start paying her double lol.  

Which brings me to today: My wife and I have out first marriage counseling session.  I'm glad we are doing it, and our communication has reached a whole new level recently but I'm almost in a panic attack thinking about it.  Luckily, it's very local to us and we decided to wear our tenis outfits and go hit balls afterwards on a practice wall figuring if it went well it would be a fun way to celebrate and do something together and it it was hard on us, hitting the balls would be a good distraction and cathartic.  

Until then I'm going to distract myself a bit and run a few work errands and go sit by the pool before the thunderstorms show up this afternoon (hopefully it rains so I don't have to water gardens today in this heat)

 

@Elizabeth Staryea, that little 20R motor with the light frame really made those Celicas quick for their time. And of course, the Mustang 2 was an abomination of the Mustang legacy lol. I liked my 77 so much that when I got back from my tours in Europe I bought an 85 GT. It was definitely a better performer but style wise I liked the 77 better. The 85 got me put on driver's probation after a couple of 100+mph tickets lol. I had to sell it and buy a slug of a car to not lose my license (82 nissan sentra diesel sedan ugh) I kinda equate the development of the Celica line same as the Datsuns.  Nothing looked as good as the 240/260 but the 280s and 300 were fricken fast.

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2 hours ago, Erica Gabriel said:

I’m sure that, statistically, we make up a rather small part of the population.

 

Estimated .5% if you were curious. I've been seeing a lot more of us in person lately though. It might be that I keep eating at the restaurant next to the tattoo place. It might also be that a lot of people came out during quarantine. Either way, I'm always chatty with my brothers and sisters in the community.

 

1 hour ago, Elizabeth Star said:

So the last few days have been an emotional struggle.

 

Well, they're probably not HELPING, but all the other things you mentioned are MORE than enough to knock somebody off their keel for a bit. You're worried about your wife, you're dealing with work stuff, there's all the baggage that comes with being a woman and it's still pretty new.

So yeah, punch somebody, Lay them RIGHT out and blame PMS. ?

 

Hugs!

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1 hour ago, Jackie C. said:

 

See now THAT actually sounds like fun. Every work function I've ever been to was more like, "Catered food (maybe) and listen to the CEO talk about how great the company/he in particular is." No thanks.

 

Though lately it's been more, "Try and find a spot in your work day (hint: you can't) to come grab some of the food in the break room." Oh, and "spirit week." I mean seriously? My work uniform is SAFETY GEAR. You want me to dress funny instead? Idiots. I work for idiots.

 

Hugs!

I'm definitely a "different" kinda boss.  We shut down on St Paddy's and go have a "long lunch" at the Irish pub, we've done "interactive movie" nights at the Alamo draft house (think Rocky horror type interactions with classic holiday movies like Beetlejuice and Elf). We've even taken a day off in the summer to have a waterpark day.  I usually talk for a few minutes on something work related but it's always a positive subject.  For me, developing a work culture where everyone is excited to see each other every day is important.  Work sucks day in a day out but if you love the people you are with then it improves your attitude when there.  Leads to less turnover and just a general improvement in everyone's standard of life.  I use to hire people based on their "work ability". now I hire on their "humanistic ability" and teach them the job part if needed.  Teaching tasks is easy, teaching people how to be human is impossible.  When I switched to this approach, my biz took off.

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1 hour ago, Bri2020 said:

Which brings me to today: My wife and I have out first marriage counseling session.  I'm glad we are doing it, and our communication has reached a whole new level recently but I'm almost in a panic attack thinking about it.  Luckily, it's very local to us and we decided to wear our tenis outfits and go hit balls afterwards on a practice wall figuring if it went well it would be a fun way to celebrate and do something together and it it was hard on us, hitting the balls would be a good distraction and cathartic.  

 

Good luck sweetie! I hope you two can work things out in a way that makes both of you happy!

 

Remember: BOTH. A lot of us (myself included) are too quick to give up on our happiness for the sake of our partners. I'm not saying lock your spouse out, but you have to stand up for yourself too. I want you blissfull, you hear me? BLISS-FULL.

 

Hugs!

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1 hour ago, Bri2020 said:

I use to hire people based on their "work ability". now I hire on their "humanistic ability" and teach them the job part if needed.  Teaching tasks is easy, teaching people how to be human is impossible.  When I switched to this approach, my biz took off.

 

Like I said: I work for idiots. In my first week I heard the trifecta. "You had better be ready to advocate for yourself come raise time," "The company used to do a bunch of stuff to help you advance your career, but they stopped," and "We have a real turnover problem."

 

I'm currently enjoying a week of unpaid time off because my client was put on hold. I have no idea when he's supposed to resume sessions or what I'm supposed to do in the meantime. It's just, "Oh yeah, we don't need you for an unspecified amount of time. Wait until somebody calls you back in."

I'm going to work on my PT certificate so I can find a different job.

 

Hugs!

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@Jackie C. I was always told you had look out for yourself no one else would. I hated that philosophy but did what I could to survive. And I had an engineering degree but always had to play pretend to actually caring about my job.

Education never hurts and it sounds like a different job might be your best course of action.

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1 hour ago, Jackie C. said:

 

Good luck sweetie! I hope you two can work things out in a way that makes both of you happy!

 

Remember: BOTH. A lot of us (myself included) are too quick to give up on our happiness for the sake of our partners. I'm not saying lock your spouse out, but you have to stand up for yourself too. I want you blissfull, you hear me? BLISS-FULL.

 

Hugs!

First- I absolutely love you.

I'm working on the bliss thing.  I've lived there for a year and I want it back so I'm gonna get there again.

One thing my therapist(electrolyist) said to me was "Bri, -what the heck- are you doing going to the worst place scenario? You always analyse and think things through before you react.  You have no idea what you are going to want in another year or two. You're still transitioning for gods sake lol.  For all you know, you might want to explore being Bi. (pretty sure I am not). Point being, you are still developing into who you are. You haven't experience it yet, but I know that people are going to flock to you and be attracted to you and fall in love with you and you are going to be blown away by it and it's going to be something you are going to have to deal with. So you may find, you're open to exploring other relationships at that point.  "   

So, I'm taking her advice and not making plans for what I may want yet out of my relationship and just trying to live day to day and love and appreciate that fact that I do have a pretty amazing relationship right now. (minus the sex part) 

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1 hour ago, Jackie C. said:

 

I'm going to work on my PT certificate so I can find a different job.

 

Hugs!

or become a LCSW because you are amazing at cutting through stuff and offering wisdom (and there is a HUGE need for therapists lol). Become self employed, pick you clients and hours and never lack for income. It's a hell of a lot of school though.

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1 hour ago, Shay said:

Education never hurts and it sounds like a different job might be your best course of action.

 

Education is paid for in a field I actually like. Much lower chance of me being bitten at work too. I should be finishing section two today. Tomorrow at the latest. I plan to flip the job search into high gear once I'm done with the recovery period for my surgery.

The worst part is that I'm actually working for one of the BETTER companies in this field. It's crazy.

 

1 hour ago, Bri2020 said:

I'm working on the bliss thing.  I've lived there for a year and I want it back so I'm gonna get there again.

 

Good. More bliss for Bri. Stat!

 

Yeah, I live by "plan for the worst and hope you're surprised" too. I had a pretty solid idea of who I was though. I mean I CAN be attracted to a guy, but it better be one HELL of a guy, you know? I went full depth on my GCS, but that was more to shut the dysphoria monster up (it insisted, I couldn't tell you why) than because I want any measure of penis up there. Not sure about the last bit either. There's no possible way I could have a sexual relationship with someone without catching feelings. My brain just doesn't work like that. Then again I'm demisexual so your mileage may vary.

 

1 hour ago, Bri2020 said:

or become a LCSW because you are amazing at cutting through stuff and offering wisdom (and there is a HUGE need for therapists lol).

 

I don't know, that's three degrees that I can't afford and my therapist is going back to work as a social worker part-time to make ends meet. I enjoy physical training and my gym time and I have enough money to pay for that. I'm probably going back to school for a degree in kinesthetics once I've got my starter PT job, but right now my eventual goal is senior fitness.

 

Hugs!

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1 hour ago, Jackie C. said:

 

Good luck sweetie! I hope you two can work things out in a way that makes both of you happy!

 

Remember: BOTH. A lot of us (myself included) are too quick to give up on our happiness for the sake of our partners. I'm not saying lock your spouse out, but you have to stand up for yourself too. I want you blissfull, you hear me? BLISS-FULL.

 

Hugs!

 

Jackie, I so need to learn how to do just that. I am too quick to take the easy way most of the time. Been this way all my life, maybe one of the clues I am a girl?

 

@Bri2020 I need to come work for you. I work for big corporation USA. So it is all about the $$$$. I remember we had a snow storm on a Sunday. I was the only one who made it in. everyone else was stuck. I ran the store alone, ( Against Co policy) until my shift ended at 2. I let my manager know this. He was in contact with the district and regional managers. He said they wanted me to stay open for another 2 hours. I said No.  They wanted the 2 more hours of $$$$. maybe $50.

 

I would love to get out of retail. But alas I believe I am stuck here till I retire.

 

Kymmie

 

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      Either new environment/ not potty trained
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Bob was on his way home from the dojo and he "just happened" to driver by her place. It was 10:30.  Her light was still on.  He knew exactly where she was sitting.  He saw her in his mind.   A fierce wave of desire that took his breath away suddenly showed up. All he had to do was stop, get out of the car, walk to the door and knock.  She would answer, glad to see him.  She would know why he was there and what he wanted. She would invite him in, maybe get him something to drink, disappear for a moment and return in "something more comfortable."  She would lead him back. Oh, joy.   And never, ever speak to him again afterwards.  Or she would not let him in but be angry about it.  In no way, emotionally, physically, mentally or spiritually, was she ready for this, and he knew it, if he was honest with himself, and she knew he knew it.  She would look upon it as another assault and their relationship would be irretrievably broken.  He would have to leave town. It would devastate her. It would devastate him.    He fought himself.  He was frozen to his seat as his reason and his body fought. He was twenty four years old, a full-blooded male with normal desires; he had just worked out and he was ready.  All he had to do now was open the car door. No one would know. He held his hands, one in the other, to keep one from moving, against his reason and will, to open that door.  He did not want to be a slave of his desires.   He looked across the street.  Mrs. McCarthy, sister of his landlord, was peeking though her window.  She knew his car.  Everyone in town would know by noon the next day if he got out of the car.  Taylor did not need that, either, and she would know, if he came to the door now, what a selfish thing it would be: in his own eyes, in the eyes of Taylor, in the eyes of the town, and worst of all, in the eyes of God.   He sat there a moment longer.  He was, as he reflected, entering into her sufferings in a small way that she would be made whole, healthy and happy: what he wanted more than anything.  But this hurt.  Why had all this come on her?  He asked God again, but there was only silence. He drove home in that silence. He chided himself for even going on her street and for driving on it other nights.  He would stop that, he told himself.   ------------------------------------------   The next morning Taylor went out to her car to go to work.  Mrs. McCarthy met her before she got to it. "I thought you were going to get lucky last night, dearie," she said. Taylor was puzzled. "Why, what do you mean?" "That young fellow - you know, Bob - he's been driving around here, going up and down the street some nights, not stopping.  Well, last night he parked and sat in his car for a while.   I think he was staring at your window.  I think he was trying to get up the courage to knock on the door. I was rooting for him.   But then he drove away.  Faint heart never won fair lady, as they say. What a shame. You two are a lovely couple.  Well, have a good day!" "Thank you, Mrs. McCarthy."  Taylor knew Bob extremely well and knew what had been going through his mind.  She was more than grateful he had not gotten out of the car. Better for him, better for her, better for everybody.  Surgery "down there" sooner than later.  This was driving the poor boy crazy. It was driving her crazy, too.  But she had a lot to work through. Surgery "up here" she said, pointing to her head.  She woke up her therapist on the way to work.  They were still talking when she pulled into her designated parking spot.  That was a perk that had happened yesterday.  She took a deep breath and headed into work. It would be another wild day.
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