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KymmieL

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1 hour ago, Marcie Jensen said:

I have, and was disappointed with the results. I can't recall the vendor, but they advertised human hair wigs for a very reasonable price. When the product arrived, it did not fit. It did, however fit my four year old granddaughter... I would humbly suggest that a local wig shop might be a better option.

 

Thanks. I went to hair club. They sent me links to the places they recommend, but there is no app from them to do a virtual try on to see what style would look best on me. There are lots of gender swap and hairstyle apps for phone. I'm 68 yrs old. Hard to choose an app for my age.

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Heading to my daughter's for birthday party for granddaughter today.  It's about an hour's drive.   Several of the family will be there, including my ex and her boyfriend.

 

To be honest, I still have problems with that.  I doubt that I'll ever get past it.  But I'll just play it off like it's nothing - or try to.

 

Might spend the night, haven't made up my mind yet.  I don't like driving at night anymore.

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Good morning everyone,

today is yard work day. We’ve normally had a frost or two, maybe even a freeze by now causing the grass to go dormant. It’s still needing a cut. The ?? Halloween Decorations are up, and kid friendly. It’s funny how we’ve been in this neighborhood long enough that everyone’s grandchildren are trick or treating now. 
 

The coffee was HOT, black, and strong.

 

Hugs,

 

Mindy??️‍⚧️???‍♀️

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Nothing going on at my place but a few small renovations that contactors are finishing up on.

As for me, my last business meeting 2 weeks ago was when I pulled out of being a landlord.

This whole mess had been going on for a year.

Since I pulled out of this blasted landlord business  my drinking dropped by two thirds!! On its own!! My cigarette smoking dropped in half on its own also.

 

So anyway, this is where I'm at now.

LM.

 

 

 

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Just when I thought my world couldn't get any weirder I received a text message today. It was and ex from 30+ years ago. I was friends with her through her husband's FB until I came out and then they disappeared off my friends list but it was also before I changed my name. Apparently she found my number that was linked to an old snapchat account I don't use. She told me the reason she sought me out was due to dream she had about me. I didn't get any details other then she had the dream and when she woke she checked her snap chat and I was suggested as a friend. We ended up texting for while and I learned that our jobs are only 10 minutes apart and there were several other places over the years where we could have run into each other even in other states. Her husband may have even worked with another one of my exes. Who knows maybe we did see each other and just didn't know it. She did make it clear that she's not stalking me and is just trying to reconnect with old friends that she values but ?. Maybe just a fan? Doesn't matter either way. She did bring up that she had an "experience" with one of her cis friends a few years ago but realized she isn't a lesbian or even bi but again ?. She really wants to meet for coffee or lunch someday "real" soon. At this point I'm not sure how to feel. I'm probably just gonna go with the flow but still ?

 

Tonight my partner and I went to visit a friend (not the one mentioned above). For some reason she just randomly, flat-out asked me my bra size. Who asks that? Kind of inappropriate don't ya think? Her husband was there and everything. I just thought f-it and answered honestly. Now due to the discrepancy between what size I feel fits right without getting crushed and what my partner thinks I am I was told to goto VS and get officially sized. I think she's going to be surprised when the "official" numbers says I should be a D cup because they don't account for my wider rib cage.  Oh, oh ,oh and shoes. Our friend is giving me some of her unused shoes.  Their efforts to de-clutter will be my gain,,,on of these days.

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8 hours ago, Elizabeth Star said:

I think she's going to be surprised when the "official" numbers says I should be a D cup because they don't account for my wider rib cage.

 

Sure. Rub it in. ?

 

Seriously though, that is weird. The closest I've gotten to somebody from the wayback machine looking me up is one old friend asking another, "Did <deadname> have a sister?"

 

Then again, I was a VERY dedicated hermit.

 

Hugs!

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1 hour ago, Jackie C. said:

"Did <deadname> have a sister?"

I wish this would happen to me. I'm very creative and good with my hands. That in itself makes it to easy for people to put the pieces together.

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1 hour ago, Elizabeth Star said:

I wish this would happen to me. I'm very creative and good with my hands. That in itself makes it to easy for people to put the pieces together.

 

People are more clueless than you think. At my brother-in-law's funeral, I strung along one of the people who stood up at my wedding for a good ten minutes. With my wife standing next to me. She had NO idea who I could possibly be until my spouse took pity on her and flashed her wedding ring.

 

I don't think I look that different. It just sidesteps people's expectations.

 

Hugs!

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1 hour ago, Jackie C. said:

 

I strung along one of the people who stood up at my wedding for a good ten minutes.

That's cruel!  ?

 

I don't string people along, but I don't necessarily disclose who I was.  I hang out on a FB page for people who flew the same aircraft as me in the air force.  To most of them, I am just some female pilot from way back.  I have had people ask if I was <deadname>'s sister.  For people I actually flew with, I will say, "Check your logbook for 1-Mar-78, aircraft #123.  That was me." 

 

Coolest of all was the official first female pilot in the air force, who graduated four years after I did.  When I eventually sent her a friend request, she admitted that she had figured it out.  No big deal.

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1 hour ago, KathyLauren said:

That's cruel!

 

Also HILARIOUS. The point being that I did the same thing. It was basically, "Oh, I know who you are. We've met." Then she spent ten minutes trying to figure out who I was.

 

Hugs!

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22 hours ago, Elizabeth Star said:

Oh, oh ,oh and shoes. Our friend is giving me some of her unused shoes.  Their efforts to de-clutter will be my gain,,,on of these days.

That’s great, especially if the shoes fit. 
 

Mindy??️‍⚧️?

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Had to make a run to Wally world today. On my way I stopped by bath and body works to see if they had gotten in the twisted peppermint in yet. it is a Xmas scent. Not yet. The gals there must have saw me as more feminine or who knows. I was treated not as a man looking but as someone shopping for feminine scents. It felt good.

 

Yes, I did wear a mask.

 

On my way across town to wallys. I passed a wells fargo. a young lady was coming out of using the ATM. She was wearing a t shirt and a mid thigh skirt. I thought aloud. I think I could totally rock that look. :)

 

I have been wanting to go back to being more feminine but am still held back. Why couldn't my wife get a worst case of covid.

 

Kymmie

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Ended up doing a coming Out on my Instagram, it just sort of happened as I  followed a few other transwomen's pages in my area.

I am already starting to become aware of the ways social media or the web in general can either be an effective "therapeutic" tool or just means of disseminating social status (important stuff like gender), or either disastrously compulsive or addictive, esp. for younger trans. 

Normally it's just an art-related stuff page I do, but like here I am finding the need for any community or support I can get and I plan on stopping by an event next weekend that I will see some "music business" friends that I haven't seen IRL in a few years.

As my therapist says, transition is when you often find out who your friends really are. And having some sort of visibility resonates with me as any remaining semblance of living closeted actually becomes intolerable, as well as the things that trigger my dysphoria.

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I spent all weekend in Golden for a bicycle race series. I was in full “den mother” mode setting up the team tent, bringing refreshments, and cheering people on. Of course, I raced with the 50+ Women category too. I did a little coming out and it went well. It was nice to be out doing my races and hearing my name from the announcers and my peers as they cheered me on. I got to know more of the women in my category too. They seem to really like me even though at 6’1” I look like a linebacker compared to them. 
 

 

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Hey-o, have an appointment to get my hair cut today. Haven't had it cut since before lockdown. Can't seem to make up my mind on what I want. I want to keep as much length as I can,  it is down to the middle of my back. Do I want the front longer, or do I want bangs? I'm presenting when I'm off, but not out at work yet. So many options...

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11 hours ago, KymmieL said:

I have been wanting to go back to being more feminine but am still held back. Why couldn't my wife get a worst case of covid.

 

Oh no sweetie, you'd be devastated if she'd actually perished. You've got to be the bigger woman.

 

It sounds like you feel trapped though. Where's the Kymmie who had a plan to make a clean break with her old life?

 

Hugs!

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1 hour ago, Jackie C. said:

 

Oh no sweetie, you'd be devastated if she'd actually perished. You've got to be the bigger woman.

 

It sounds like you feel trapped though. Where's the Kymmie who had a plan to make a clean break with her old life?

 

Hugs!

I agree. I was going to say something else, but you said it better. Thank you.

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2 hours ago, stveee said:

Ended up doing a coming Out on my Instagram, it just sort of happened as I  followed a few other transwomen's pages in my area.

I am already starting to become aware of the ways social media or the web in general can either be an effective "therapeutic" tool or just means of disseminating social status (important stuff like gender), or either disastrously compulsive or addictive, esp. for younger trans. 

Normally it's just an art-related stuff page I do, but like here I am finding the need for any community or support I can get and I plan on stopping by an event next weekend that I will see some "music business" friends that I haven't seen IRL in a few years.

As my therapist says, transition is when you often find out who your friends really are. And having some sort of visibility resonates with me as any remaining semblance of living closeted actually becomes intolerable, as well as the things that trigger my dysphoria.

It's a good feeling not hiding who you are, very liberating.

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Hi everyone 

 

finally getting caught up on boat work.  Port side of hull to clean and I can start on the motor work.  Maybe this weekend. @KymmieL I agree you wouldn’t want the worst to happen.  But if things are that bad you could resurrect your old plan.  
 

I know I won’t go full time, that didn’t work for me but I am back on my full hormones and dying for a day as Willow.

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Very interesting stuff going on here lately. Make a clean break, feeling you're trapped, I'll add to that one.

RETIERMENT!!! With nothing to do and physical limitation, I went in to over indulging, gained 12 pounds, and made an ars 

out off myself. I found myself trapped. The clean break, I had contractors over for the new shower,

I did the wall. Removed the old med. cab., light bar, sink and faucet, replaced them with this.

Recovery, yep, never stop believing in yourself.

 

 

 

Bath.jpg

Bath2.jpg

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2 hours ago, Willow said:

Hi everyone 

 

finally getting caught up on boat work.  Port side of hull to clean and I can start on the motor work.  Maybe this weekend. @KymmieL I agree you wouldn’t want the worst to happen.  But if things are that bad you could resurrect your old plan.  
 

I know I won’t go full time, that didn’t work for me but I am back on my full hormones and dying for a day as Willow.

I know the pain.❤️

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So anyway, now that I'm done with chores today, I thought I'd throw this at you all.

Ever notice that while up 38,000 feet, does not matter which airline, that even with the roaring engines 

and it is bathroom time, and you are standing at the door which says occupied and even over the jet engines you hear

the flush! Three rows in front, and three rows back, all hear the flush!!

And then you start thinking, gosh is it true? Is this really where those green frozen blobs falling from the sky come from?

And then you enter that tiny cubical with the engines roaring, wipe the seat down and test the flush before you sit.

Now at the same time you know someone on the other side of the door is waiting for that flush sound,

and all you can think is, I don't care, I ain't sitting on that seat until is is clean and I'm sure my innards ain't gonna get

sucked out and turned into one of those green frozen blobs falling from the sky and no one will hear me scream, they only hear the toilet flush waiting for their turn.?

LM.

 

 

 

 

 

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1 hour ago, LindaMarie said:

Ever notice that while up 38,000 feet, does not matter which airline, that even with the roaring engines 

and it is bathroom time, and you are standing at the door which says occupied and even over the jet engines you hear

the flush!

 

Actually no. I have never so much as once in my life used the toilet on the airplane.

 

Hugs!

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13 hours ago, Jackie C. said:

It sounds like you feel trapped though. Where's the Kymmie who had a plan to make a clean break with her old life?

 

Hugs!

I am starting to feel that way. Maybe it is being cooped up at home.  That Kymmie is in hiding. She doesn't want to lose her family.

 

Kymmie

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    • Ivy
      I grew up with it, my mother's side were Germans.  I still like cabbage.  I make a sweet/sour dish with vinegar and brown sugar, add some bacon if you have it.  And in warmer weather, slaw.  I like that better if it's a few days old, and has worked off a little.
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      Pity that we can't just respect each other and get along.
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      Good Friday Morning    I will be spending a good portion of my day at church today.  I don’t know how any of my family would have been with me.  They all passed before I figured myself out.  I often think my mother and sister may have figured it out before I did but maybe it was just my depression that they saw.  I don’t know and never will.  My grandfather Young unconditionally loved me but he passed when I was 9.   Same with my wife’s parents, both gone before.  We’ve never had the greatest relationship with my wife’s brother but we do see them occasionally.  They words and actions aren’t always in sink when it comes to me.   Sour kraut or boil cabbage were never big even with my parents so that was something we were never expected to eat.  Nor was anything with mustard.  My mother hated mustard and it turns my stomach. My wife tried to sneak it into things early in our marriage but I could always tell.  She stopped after a while.   well I wave to go get ready to go to church.  I have a committee meeting at 10 and then we have a Good Friday Service at noon.   Willow
    • Mmindy
      Good morning everyone,   @KymmieLI hope you're misreading your bosses communications. As you say keep plugging a long. Don't give them signs that you're slow quitting, just to collect unemployment.   I have a few things to do business wise, and will be driving to the St. Louis, MO area for two family gatherings.   Have a great day,   Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
    • KymmieL
      Good morning everyone, TGIFF   It seems like I am the one keeping or shop from being the best. According to the boss. I don't know if my days are numbered or not. But anymore I am waiting for the axe to fall. Time will tell.   I keep plugging a long.   Kymmie
    • KymmieL
      In the warmer weather, Mine is hitting the road on the bike. Just me, the bike, and the road. Other is it music or working on one of my many projects.   Kymmie
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