Good morning All. Coffees on.

[Heather Nicole]

15 minutes ago, Hannah Renee said:

Especially having the letters in hand, it's nice to dream about getting it all done - and torture, as well. Maybe I'll win the lottery and get all of us our surgeries, along with home health care nurses for those who need them. (If you're going to dream, dream big.) Maybe I'll go broke playing the lottery. Maybe I'll just take the consolation prize of an orchiectomy, and at least get rid of some of the useless baggage.

 

Every once in a great while (maybe a time or two every few months) I'll go ahead and pick up a couple lottery tickets. Even won a few times...no, not the jackpot of course. About a dollar or two. Just enough to cancel out what I paid for the tickets, lol!

 

But I like the way you think! 😉

[KymmieL]

I just wonder what my wife would say if I was the poster girl for the first VA funded GRS. (that wasn't a needed thing) I believe i would be single.

 

Anyhoo, My Friday a day earlier. With the boss on vacation, the other manager is opening the store. Then he has Friday off so I get too open then. Well at least I am working days. Then next week back to closing. I am getting more sure that the boss doesn't like me. (a transwoman) but nothing I can prove.

 

Take care everyone. off to the grind.

 

Kymmie

[stveee]

9 hours ago, Heather Nicole said:

 

Funny that the topic of genital dysphoria shows up now - it's been on my mind today.  My lower (genital) dysphoria turned out to be somewhat of a repressed one. Repressed dysphorias can be a strange thing to experience. I mean, granted, I always knew I had a fascination with what it would be like to have the other "configuration" down there, and there were also other clues (in retrospect) that it must have bothered me at least subconsciously. But I never had a conscious sense of being bothered by the lower parts I have until my egg cracked. Ever since I realized I was probably trans, I've just been hyper-aware of their existence, like I can always feel them all there down there, hanging like some kind of tumor. (Sorry...like I mentioned, it's been on my mind today...)

 

 

It feels like the further along I go in transition and the more E does its stuff, these things become more pronounced for me.

Like recently, any kind of razor or shaver on my face is REALLY not feeling right and although I disassociated with bottom dysmorphia, it's really becoming uncomfortable even tho there I have no real difficulty tucking. I always felt like my stuff was disconnected from my brain but that must have been a psychological block. Many trans women do not end up getting bottom work and I understand that women can have any parts, but I admit it is triggering to see a trans woman with stock equipment.

There is a question I suppose in the Community whether this is hetero conditioning and getting rid of "binary opression". There seems to be more movement and visibility for NB people than ever before, and I suppose cultural conditioning plays a part in identity. Myself, I am unapologetically binary. The supposed "trappings" of "trad" womanhood are actually liberating for me. 

This is prob. for another thread, but poltically, there is strong pushback against any semblance to the "opressive cis hetero white male" and for me, it feels a bit reactionary and ideological. Authenticity is an entirely personal matter.

[JJ Orange]

@Mmindy @Willow Thank you both for your kind words! I will try to work hard and remember that you motivated me! 

 

As for morning time, I will be making my coffee soon. 1st day of online classes was chaotic but somewhat average. 2nd day is today so I have most of my week in order now. It's mostly introductory readings and ice-breakers. ❤️ ☕

[Willow]

@KymmieL  this one’s for you

[Mmindy]

2 hours ago, Willow said:

this one’s for you

Hahaaaa, 😅

 

🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋

[helena]

Good morning from the other side of the world 😁

 

Time for some ICT-training for the rest of the week. Actually looking forward to it. Getting some well deserved distraction from my inner feelings and conflicts 👏

 

Good night to @Hannah Renee. I suppose you're about to get some sleep 😁. And of course everybody else in the western timezones.

 

Cheers, Helena

 

[Elizabeth Star]

Good morning, my coffee is half gone . I'll get more when I get to work.

 

I had been severely stressing over the nicotine testing for my upcoming surgery. Although, I thew out all my vaping equipment and supplies right after the phone call there always that fear something will go wrong. And, the test takes a week to perform so there's plenty of time to freak out over nothing. Got the official word yesterday, I'm good, my levels are that of a non-smoker now and there's no way I'm ever picking up that habit again.

 

I have a lot going on with my relationships lately. Polyamory seems to be working for me. I am currently in relationships with 6 people. It's interesting how everyone seems to want someone but not all the time and definitely not in their space 24/7. No U-Hauls, no rings. life is good. There is one partner I really wish I could openly talk about. She is so amazing and our thoughts and feeling on things line up quite a bit. Could just sit there on the hood of car, with her head on my should for hours and hours, just enjoying the moment.

 

Ugh!, time to get ready for work.

 

Have a great day everyone❤️

[stveee]

@Elizabeth Star good job on quitting nicotine

IDK if I could date 6 people and be romantically involved with all of them at once, but I am curious about trying to move outside of tradition. I guess it has to do with transparency and openness. I think I am prob. already involved with someone who could be poly but we just haven't defined it as such. Because now I am starting to see another girl and it feels more natural to me just to be open about everything. Because a lot of people the marriage template just didn't work out, and they blame themselves. 

[Ivy]

9 minutes ago, stveee said:

IDK if I could date 6 people and be romantically involved with all of them at once, but I am curious about trying to move outside of tradition.

I think I would like to go in this direction.   I realized awhile back that one could love more than one person at the same time.  But it's really just a thought since I'm not in even one relationship, and can't see any in the future either.  

Oh well…

 

[KymmieL]

It would just be nice for 6 people to want to be a true friend. Oh, well the world keeps turning.

 

Finally a day off alone where I am not under pressure to get things unpacked. After a shower, I'm dressing in something comfy and maybe work on getting my hobby desk organized. May work on the custom bags for the bike. May run to the hardware store and pick up some shelving brackets to get some more storage in the garage. Maybe I'll see about picking up a ladder and putting up the new lights for the front/back door and garage.

 

Or maybe I'll just sit and drink coffee al day and veg.

 

Have a great day everyone.

 

Hugs,

Kymmie

[JJ Orange]

Coffee: made, Textbook: open, Mind: fried! 
Waiting for Pumpkin Spice to come back already. I need to get my halloween on! 💀🐛👻

[Elizabeth Star]

1 hour ago, JJ Orange said:

Coffee: made, Textbook: open, Mind: fried! 
Waiting for Pumpkin Spice to come back already. I need to get my halloween on! 💀🐛👻

Everyday is Halloween in my world!

[Ryan]

Been a while since I've been here, but I'm over 2 months on T! 

[Ryan]

1 minute ago, Ryan said:

Been a while since I've been here, but I'm over 2 months on T! 

I just wanted to add, I also got all my legal documents changed! Just a few more things to get updated! 

[Ivy]

5 minutes ago, Ryan said:

just wanted to add, I also got all my legal documents changed! Just a few more things to get updated! 

That sounds good

[Bri2020]

Congrats Ryan and welcome back!

[Bri2020]

41 days till bottom surgery and I am officially freaked out.  Adding to that, I've developed a case of jock itch for the first time in 2 years. How does that work when they flip everything inside into a moist environment? Of all the things to worry about, now I'm concerned I will be constantly fighting that battle.

I saw back a few pages people were concerned about having a support person.  Check with your doctor/care manager/insurance to see if skill cared is an option for your recovery period. They might be able to arrange for a nursing assistant to be there for you for a couple of days.

Liz I don't know how you manage that many people, sounds exhausting but I am glad your life is on your terms now and you seem to be so much happier than a couple years back.  Wow, a couple years! I've been on this site now for a little over 2 years. 

My life goes into official craziness now.  in 30 days I start to isolate to avoid a positive covid test pre-op.  Between now and then I have a 5 day scuba trip, then my final trip to genital electro in Chicago, back home for 6 days then off to see my daughter in FL for a long weekend.  Somewhere in between all this I have to help a couple get their home ready for market and get that listed/sold.  Yup- officially overwhelmed.  I'm hoping I don't have to deal with any work stuff on the scuba trip, I need the break. I am doing something totally cool for this trip and going on a Blackwater Dive. Basically instead of diving on a reef, you go way out to a place with 600-1000 feet of water at night and jump off the boat. They hang some lights and reflectors off the boat for a reference but you hang out around 50 feet down and away from the lights. All the small critters like cephalopods, shrimps, baby fish/octopus and squid all come up from the deep attracted to the moon. I can't wait to see how it goes and hopefully get good macro photos of luminescent creatures!   Every so often, the open ocean sharks show up like blues, threshers, white tips etc.  If I get any good pics I will post some.

[CD Rachel]

@Bri2020 That dive trip sounds incredible!! Hope you have a blast. I may look into getting back into diving next year.

 

~Rachel

[Elizabeth Star]

@Bri202041 days, wow, congratulations. You're not going to forget about us afterwards are you?

 

Managing all those people isn't as hard as it might seem. It's not like I see each one of them every day. At the moment there's only 3 that I see with any regularity. The others, it's mostly we text or talk on messenger. It's the idea of having someone else in your life that cares and will listen that can make all the difference in the world. And I do care. They message me, I message back, immediately. Not hours later.

 

I got the official word on Tuesday to stop taking my HRT meds, That includes my Progesterone and sleep aids (no NSAIDs). I really need my Tylenol PM or NyQuil Z. I literally cannot sleep with out them so I'm back on the Ambien. I took that stuff every night for 15 years and was happy to get away from it at the beginning of the year. Thankfully it's only for a couple of weeks.

 

I got pulled into a meeting with the VP at work again. Something about my skirts being too short. It probably because I started wearing then up around my waist instead down at my hips. But, I found out, despite what my supervisory told me, there is no issue or policy with wearing dresses, skirts and open toed shoes.

 

 

[Jackie C.]

47 minutes ago, Elizabeth Star said:

I got pulled into a meeting with the VP at work again. Something about my skirts being too short. It probably because I started wearing then up around my waist instead down at my hips. But, I found out, despite what my supervisory told me, there is no issue or policy with wearing dresses, skirts and open toed shoes.

 

So they're harassing you in particular? Charming.

 

Sorry to hear about your HRT though, that's going to be miserable in about two weeks. Hopefully you can get back on it soon.

 

As for poly relationships... so long as you're not everybody else's rock. I've got a poly friend who likes to save people. That's great and all, but it makes her a magnet for people that really ought to be working on themselves instead of relying on my friend. I met one of her new girlfriends yesterday and I was not impressed. She can definately do better.

 

10 hours ago, Bri2020 said:

41 days till bottom surgery and I am officially freaked out.  Adding to that, I've developed a case of jock itch for the first time in 2 years. How does that work when they flip everything inside into a moist environment? Of all the things to worry about, now I'm concerned I will be constantly fighting that battle.

 

It will hurt ENTIRELY too much for you to even notice. They're also going to disinfect the heck out of that tissue before they invert. Treat the jock itch though. You don't want an active fungal infection messing up your new gear. We're prone to yeast and bladder infections as it is and dilation is enough of a chore without a yeast infection on top of it. Best advice I got from my surgeon was, "Be in the best shape of your life." You want to be as healthy as possible going in.

 

I also feel like I should make a mushroom collector joke, but I'm much too classy for that.

 

11 hours ago, Ryan said:

I just wanted to add, I also got all my legal documents changed! Just a few more things to get updated! 

 

Congratulations! That's a big milestone! I hope you're loving it as much as I did!

 

Hugs!

[KymmieL]

Well got some stuff done yesterday. All three of the lights are up and working great. I was even able to get more of my desk in order. Today I am going to try and find a panel and fuse block for a couple projects. Wish me luck. Will be running up to wally world for some cheap brushes so I can break out the fiberglass and work on the extended bags for the bike.

 

I now know why you see so many woman wearing yoga pants. Wore some yesterday. wow are they comfy. Well check a couple more things and off to my chores.

 

Hugs,

Kymmie

[Willow]

Good morning 

 

Well, today is turning out to be a good day after all.  My lawyer called yesterday and said I’d been excused from court.  They can’t get ahold of the alleged complainant.  He will apprise me of my next court date or the dismissal which ever occurs.

 

I suppose depending upon how you define it, we all could be poly.  I certainly have multiple close girlfriends.  Some here and others on Facebook but only one in a daily face to face relationship, my wife.

 

@Bri2020 night diving can be very exciting.  You will definitely see critters you don’t see during the day time.  DO NOT shine your light at a barracuda. They are attracted to anything shiny and will come towards the light.  I used to teach diving in a very low visibility quarry.  I’ve done and lead night dives as a a scuba instructor.

 

Willow
 

 

[Billie75B]

7 hours ago, Elizabeth Star said:

@Bri202041 days, wow, congratulations. You're not going to forget about us afterwards are you?

 

Managing all those people isn't as hard as it might seem. It's not like I see each one of them every day. At the moment there's only 3 that I see with any regularity. The others, it's mostly we text or talk on messenger. It's the idea of having someone else in your life that cares and will listen that can make all the difference in the world. And I do care. They message me, I message back, immediately. Not hours later.

 

I got the official word on Tuesday to stop taking my HRT meds, That includes my Progesterone and sleep aids (no NSAIDs). I really need my Tylenol PM or NyQuil Z. I literally cannot sleep with out them so I'm back on the Ambien. I took that stuff every night for 15 years and was happy to get away from it at the beginning of the year. Thankfully it's only for a couple of weeks.

 

I got pulled into a meeting with the VP at work again. Something about my skirts being too short. It probably because I started wearing then up around my waist instead down at my hips. But, I found out, despite what my supervisory told me, there is no issue or policy with wearing dresses, skirts and open toed shoes.

 

 

Liz you have to stop your HRT for top surgery? OMG!

[Ivy]

6 hours ago, Willow said:

night diving can be very exciting…  …DO NOT shine your light at a barracuda…

LOL. I first read this as "night driving" - I used to know a girl that drove a barracuda.