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KymmieL

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I was up on a ladder siding an addition on an old stone house in Bucks County PA on the morning of 9/11.  One of my helpers returned with coffee and the news.  At first we thought it a joke but soon had the clients TV going and saw the towers fall.  Soon the skies were quiet.  I was scheduled for a heart procedure just across the river from NY on the 12th and thought that would be canceled but there were too few wounded to fill the hospitals.   A bit west of us a plane went down in a field.

It wa a day i remember well as it affected many friends, family and the world.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

 

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We actually had a cold morning, so it seems that fall is almost here.  My husband gets up really early to go to work, and GF usually gets up with him and they start their day together.  My sister and another of my female partners get up about the same time.  I usually sleep later, but today I just couldn't quite warm up again.

 

We don't drink coffee here, we usually have tea.  Having a Russian GF, I had to get used to that.  I prefer jasmine tea, but we usually have this strong black tea that gets made as a concentrate, then diluted with hot water.  

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Big things are happening in my life right now.  I'm fully out to all my wife's family.  So far only my mother in law has flat out rejected me.  She's not a nice person anyway and I always knew she was going to be the most difficult.

Next month I'm going to a family wedding and I'm going purely as myself.  I have a gorgeous green dress already lined up to wear.  Last year I went to a family wedding and I had to wear a men's suit.  I was miserable and I was tortured having to see all the women at the wedding in their gorgeous dresses and gowns.  This time I'm going to be one of those women!!!!  Oddly the man getting married last year is the brother of the woman getting married this year.  

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3 minutes ago, Becoming Diana said:

I'm fully out to all my wife's family.  So far only my mother in law has flat out rejected me.  She's not a nice person anyway and I always knew she was going to be the most difficult.

Congrats @Becoming Diana on coming fully out to your wife’s family. This was a very difficult thing for me also but of course, it had to be done. Sorry to read that your coming out wasn’t a 100% affirming but it rarely is especially in this political climate. Luckily, you’re not living to please her or anyone but yourself.

 

17 minutes ago, Becoming Diana said:

Next month I'm going to a family wedding and I'm going purely as myself.  I have a gorgeous green dress already lined up to wear.

Have fun at this upcoming wedding.😁 I have yet to attend a wedding as my authentic self but it is on my bucket list. I agree that wearing a beautiful dress or gown would be a such nice change from those stodgy suits and tuxes that I’ve always worn at every previous wedding I’ve attended, including my own. I bet you’re going to look fabulous in that green dress.

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Diana, It sounds like great progress, and it sounds similar to how I came out. In measured steps. Keep it up girl.

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15 hours ago, Hannah Renee said:

I was in 6th grade when JFK was shot. Kids went home for lunch in those days, and right after lunch, I was at my location guarding one of the crosswalks. David W. came up to me and told me that Kennedy had been shot. No joke, he said. We all spent the afternoon session sitting in class, waiting for updates.

 

 

At age 22, I watched the funeral cortege arrive at the entrance to Arlington National Cemetery. It was a cold, clear day. The mood was somber, and we heard nothing but the sound of the horses' hooves on pavement. I went up to the gravesite after the ceremony but before the coffin was interred. Security was lax. I had no camera, but those images remain in my mind. 

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Early thunderstorm, so up even earlier than usual. 

 

Yesterday I went to Soma and picked up a couple bras, just walked in and said I needed to start wearing them (not mentioning I had worn them occasionally almost as long as I can remember). The two women were fairly nice about it, considering the whole early Monday morning vibe. Then at a different store got 'ma'am'ed in one of those still rare occasions where it doesn't get withdrawn or corrected, amazing that two little interactions like those can lift your spirits for a day. 

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Good morning.

 

Wow, it's already Tuesday.

I had quit the weekend. We had a lot of rain on Sunday afternoon which in turn caused a tree, in my back yard, to fall. The tree took out a utility pole and ripped the electrical from my house. Thankfully they had my power back on by 9am but the tree and pole are still laying there. My neighbors were nice enough to let me plug a cord into their house so I could have some power and a plus to being vegan, I don't have to worry about meat or dairy products going bad while the fridge is out.

 

IMG_9402.jpeg

IMG_9403(1).jpeg

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In other news....

My BFF may be moving in with me at the end of the month. She's is and had been fighting with her BF. Not physically but over just about everything else, including money. She swears it has nothing to with me but I'm not entirely convinced. Maybe I was a catalyst.

 

Socially, I think I need to set myself to a higher standard. One of the people I had been seeing told me last night how they got approval from the board for us to date. Board? What? Apparently having a relationship with me could cause some unforeseen political issues and required approval before we cross the casual dating line. I can honestly say I have never felt like I was worth so much to someone and it's all based on who I am, not what I can do. But, I feel I may need to revamp and upgrade my wardrobe.

 

have a great day everyone.

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8 hours ago, Becoming Diana said:

Big things are happening in my life right now.  I'm fully out to all my wife's family.  So far only my mother in law has flat out rejected me.  She's not a nice person anyway and I always knew she was going to be the most difficult.

Next month I'm going to a family wedding and I'm going purely as myself.  I have a gorgeous green dress already lined up to wear.  Last year I went to a family wedding and I had to wear a men's suit.  I was miserable and I was tortured having to see all the women at the wedding in their gorgeous dresses and gowns.  This time I'm going to be one of those women!!!!  Oddly the man getting married last year is the brother of the woman getting married this year.  

Congrats- now we need to see the dress and just as importantly- what shoes will you be wearing!

 

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2 hours ago, RhondaS said:

Early thunderstorm, so up even earlier than usual. 

 

Yesterday I went to Soma and picked up a couple bras, just walked in and said I needed to start wearing them (not mentioning I had worn them occasionally almost as long as I can remember). The two women were fairly nice about it, considering the whole early Monday morning vibe. Then at a different store got 'ma'am'ed in one of those still rare occasions where it doesn't get withdrawn or corrected, amazing that two little interactions like those can lift your spirits for a day. 

Brings me joy to here stories like that. You keep going for it ma'am 👩

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I had a wonderful evening yesterday.  The women who run the fashion consignment shop I love came over to go through my closet and drink a lot of wine ;). The goal was to help me "garanimal" my outfits so I can not get so overwhelmed in the mornings. Over the last 2 years I've just been grabbing pieces that I thought I would like but not knowing what to wear them with.  We spent 2.5 hours ravishing the closet, putting things together and taking pics for my reference. In the end they made me toss about 50lbs of clothes that don't "work" for me.  At times they wanted to see what something looked like on me so many clothing changes were happening.  I was trying to be modest wearing a cami top and shorts and pulling things over it or running to the bathroom to change and eventually they all just said "girl, just take off your top and shorts, you're safe here". The only one who has seen me semi naked was my ex wife (who was there to witness the whole circus). I was a little uncomfortable for a second.  Once I did however it was so nice. I felt like it was a "girls locker room"  kinda thing. They did comment that my boobs came out amazing 😊  I responded with "take a gander at what $8k boobs look like ladies". lol. Anyways, it was so much fun and I am so blessed to have such good friends helping me learn quickly what to wear and what not too.  We then made an itemized shopping list that I have to stick to to complete a bunch of looks.  Mostly basics like black t-shirts and big blocky "gem colors" sweaters.  They know my sizes and will pull items that I need in the consignment shop as they come in for me to come try!  Here's some of the combos they helped me put together plus the reject pile. Anyone in the DC area a size 8-10 or size 16 jacket want to go through the rejects? ;)

FA77C876-CB66-49F0-B41A-103DD521DB72.thumb.jpeg.23d3fd91bf4c8f11821a726ecb1a8a70.jpeg726DF524-9B85-435B-8CDA-B05B21DFEA27.thumb.jpeg.63bc4c96574cefa107007b64bf88664f.jpeg5CFC75BE-727F-4DD7-80C0-0AE3A486394F.thumb.jpeg.d6bef44d7e49a385e079d0934dea17b7.jpeg96F67BDD-3F1B-4990-A57F-2150F00D8E24.thumb.jpeg.3d0be6a44af1e7f9bc6f544daed1231a.jpegED43203D-4C57-4BF2-9D8D-7F494C8D1689.thumb.jpeg.306dc35e5b774ea12d127ec4c16d1503.jpegIMG_4689.thumb.png.5ecebeb350761134f348353905565454.png

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Good morning 

 

Today I have to finish picking up and cleaning the condo.  I also need to make a trip to my boat to check on some things, pump the water out of my dinghy (we’ve had a lot of rain) and possibly do a few other things.  So it could be a busy day.  
 

I’m not enamored with my new sponsor.  I’m used to a stronger roast, and since I’m using single cup brews, I can’t really increase the amount of coffee or perk it longer.  On the up side it is smoother.

 

Weatherwise we can’t get out of the pattern of moisture.  We still have a high stuck offshore and a low that is starting to squeeze it but combined they and pulling warm moisture up from the gulf.  The low is supposed to win the battle later today but that isn’t always a good thing.  High pressure systems seem to steer potential hurricanes away. At least the next two possibilities are one to two weeks away.  This is the peak of the season.

 

@Bri2020 I understand what you mean about clothes that were a good idea at the time but aren’t now.  I have a hard time putting things together in my closet too.  Part of my issue was the while living on our boat, we had to use a laundromat.  The machines there ruined a lot of our clothes so combinations I bought are now missing half, usually the tops.

 

it’s tough keeping a usable closet.

 

well the day isn’t getting any younger.  I guess I need to get started.

 

ANYONE KNOW WHY MY EDITOR DOESN’T CLEAR sometimes after I POST.  Caps for attention not yelling.

 

hugs

 

Willow

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4 hours ago, Bri2020 said:

Congrats- now we need to see the dress and just as importantly- what shoes will you be wearing!

 

I have a pic of my dress on my profile page.  As for shoes, I have a pair of black open-toe fancy shoes I might wear and I can paint my toenails green.  Or I might have to invest in a pair of green shoes.  But the wedding is already costing us a lot with travel and a hotel stay and funds are tight right now.

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Hi everyone,

 

Well I have some things to share. I am not sure how to start. I am feeling happy, almost elated actually. Two weeks ago I had an interesting time at a LBGTQ camp ground. On Saturday night back then two acquaintances that I made who were CD introduced me to a trans woman, they thought that it would be nice for me to talk with someone like myself. I met C and we talked for almost two hours before we went our separate ways. We exchanged contact information and she invited me to comeback and visit her.

 

Well on this past Thursday night we met up for dinner at her RV and a game night in the camp rec center. We had a lot of fun. On Friday she asked if I wanted to hang out with her again. We met up on Friday and just had so much fun together that it was 4AM before we even knew it. I spent the night with her and we also spent all day Saturday and Saturday night together. Sunday morning, we had breakfast and I just had to get back home. So we said our good byes.

 

It was a very surreal experience. We talked a lot and enjoyed each other’s company. I felt like we had been friends for years. Everything just seemed to click at all the right moments. We shared our pasts and even some of our darkest secrets with each other. I am experiencing a happiness that I had not felt for years. When I am with her I feel myself… Rachel is free and happy.

 

~Rachel

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5 minutes ago, CD Rachel said:

Hi everyone,

 

Well I have some things to share. I am not sure how to start. I am feeling happy, almost elated actually. Two weeks ago I had an interesting time at a LBGTQ camp ground. On Saturday night back then two acquaintances that I made who were CD introduced me to a trans woman, they thought that it would be nice for me to talk with someone like myself. I met C and we talked for almost two hours before we went our separate ways. We exchanged contact information and she invited me to comeback and visit her.

 

Well on this past Thursday night we met up for dinner at her RV and a game night in the camp rec center. We had a lot of fun. On Friday she asked if I wanted to hang out with her again. We met up on Friday and just had so much fun together that it was 4AM before we even knew it. I spent the night with her and we also spent all day Saturday and Saturday night together. Sunday morning, we had breakfast and I just had to get back home. So we said our good byes.

 

It was a very surreal experience. We talked a lot and enjoyed each other’s company. I felt like we had been friends for years. Everything just seemed to click at all the right moments. We shared our pasts and even some of our darkest secrets with each other. I am experiencing a happiness that I had not felt for years. When I am with her I feel myself… Rachel is free and happy.

 

~Rachel

That sounds so lovely, it warms my heart to hear such stories

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12 hours ago, Bri2020 said:

The women who run the fashion consignment shop I love came over to go through my closet and drink a lot of wine ;). The goal was to help me "garanimal" my outfits so I can not get so overwhelmed in the mornings. Over the last 2 years I've just been grabbing pieces that I thought I would like but not knowing what to wear them with. 

 

Once I did however it was so nice. I felt like it was a "girls locker room"  kinda thing. They did comment that my boobs came out amazing 😊  I responded with "take a gander at what $8k boobs look like ladies".

That's a really good idea. I'm almost ashamed about how long it's taken me in the morning to put an outfit together.

 

8k? You out out easy. I just saw the bill for mine today, $32k. My insurance paid for them so I'm not to bothered by the cost.

 

 

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14 hours ago, CD Rachel said:

Hi everyone,

 

Well I have some things to share. I am not sure how to start. I am feeling happy, almost elated actually. Two weeks ago I had an interesting time at a LBGTQ camp ground. On Saturday night back then two acquaintances that I made who were CD introduced me to a trans woman, they thought that it would be nice for me to talk with someone like myself. I met C and we talked for almost two hours before we went our separate ways. We exchanged contact information and she invited me to comeback and visit her.

 

Well on this past Thursday night we met up for dinner at her RV and a game night in the camp rec center. We had a lot of fun. On Friday she asked if I wanted to hang out with her again. We met up on Friday and just had so much fun together that it was 4AM before we even knew it. I spent the night with her and we also spent all day Saturday and Saturday night together. Sunday morning, we had breakfast and I just had to get back home. So we said our good byes.

 

It was a very surreal experience. We talked a lot and enjoyed each other’s company. I felt like we had been friends for years. Everything just seemed to click at all the right moments. We shared our pasts and even some of our darkest secrets with each other. I am experiencing a happiness that I had not felt for years. When I am with her I feel myself… Rachel is free and happy.

 

~Rachel

I'm happy for you Rachel. Finding someone special is always a blessing.

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Good morning 

 

I hope everyone is having a good day, of course it’s just begun.

 

Switched sponsors today.  I made a pot instead of a single.  So, today it’s Star….  Sumatra.

 

The question has come up about paying for breast implants.  My insurance will pay for them, my copay would be under $400.  However, I can’t find a doctor who would accept my insurance.  Admittedly I’ve only started the search because I promised I’d give the patch a chance before going that route.  Closest I’ve found is in Virginia and being out of plan and out of state could be an issue.  It’s possible I’ve found one at Roper St. Frances but I’ll have to call them.

 

our annual in home health assessment is today. It’s in about an hour so not much time here.

 

have a great day

 

Willow

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Also a good morning to our coffee clutch.

 

Things are OK. Seems like the wife is ignoring me again. I must have gone something wrong in her eyes. IDK Finally have the winch mount on the truck. Now I have to modify the skid plate to work. They didn't make provisions for that. So, the cut off wheel is coming out.

 

For top surgery, or any gender conforming surgery. I am waiting for the VA to get their policies and such worked out. Should be close to the public comment phase, Last I heard from my GYN. I seriously doubt I will be able to get anything done. Wife would go off the deep end with that.

 

Have a good day all. Soon to the garage to measure, and measure again, the cut and fit then cut some more. The curse that I cut to much and looks like crap. The story of my life.

 

Later friends,

 

Kymmie

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Morning, everyone. Been in a slump recently but not so bad. I'll be making coffee soon and see if I can wake up more. Happy (sorta) Fall, I know it's not technically fall but it does feel like it. 🍁🎃

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Good morning All

The coffee is strong and good this morning in central Texas. So before I went on vacation last week I had a meeting with our HR dept and I will officially come out at work next week. I then headed to northern New Mexico near Santa Fe to spend the week with my friend at her house, she is also transgender and we are both close on our transition time line and we met a little over year ago. She invited me to come spend the week with her and it was an absolute blast. When I told her that I will be coming out on the 21st or 22nd she said girl we need to go shopping so we headed to Santa Fe for 2 days of shopping and eating great food. I have never had so much fun and the people of Santa Fe were so nice and gendered us correctly all the time. That was a real confidence builder for me, and now I have a whole new cute wardrobe for work. I also have started filling out my paper work for name and gender marker change and I hope to have that all completed by early October. Then all I am waiting on is the confirmation date from my surgeon for my FFS.

Hope everyone has a great day.

Hugs

Riley.

PS I will post pictures from Santa Fe later today.

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15 hours ago, Elizabeth Star said:

8k? You out out easy. I just saw the bill for mine today, $32k. My insurance paid for them so I'm not to bothered by the cost.

 

I wouldn't be surprised if your cost was that high because they knew your insurance was paying for it. I've heard about clinics charging different rates for the same procedure depending who's paying.

 

Although I'm not sure whether that's still a thing with the new law about transparency in medical costs (But I don't recall if that was a federal thing, or just here in Ohio.)

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15 hours ago, Elizabeth Star said:

That's a really good idea. I'm almost ashamed about how long it's taken me in the morning to put an outfit together.

 

8k? You out out easy. I just saw the bill for mine today, $32k. My insurance paid for them so I'm not to bothered by the cost.

 

 

That's an outrageous amount- he's bilking the insurance. National average is less than $5k for a BA with silicone implants. Saline are cheaper

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      Shameless plug for my "Taylor" story down in Stories You Write.  I am not Taylor and the experiences she goes through are not what has happened to me, but there is an emotional expression that I think is the best way to say some things that I don't know how to say otherwise.  I am not Bob, either.  But you might find out some things about me by reading it.  And I hope it is a good read and you enjoy it.  I am not done with it.  If you would like to comment on it, I would appreciate it.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Tuesday night.  They had a quick supper together at a fast food place.  Bob went off to teach karate and Taylor locked herself inside her apartment and worked on her hiring plan.   First the web site problem.  The two guys who ran it were self-taught and knew little.  It currently had three pages, the Home page, the About page and the Contact page,  She asked them to work with Karen in terms of redesigning it and she needed three designs to show Gibbs tomorrow.  The problem was three fold: the two guys and Karen.  Millville was a small town and all three were relatives of members of the Board.  Millville, Millvale. She was doing it.  People here called it either way, sometimes in the space of a few seconds.  She thought it was Millville.  All three had complained about the work, because the two boys regarded it as done and untouchable, even though they actually had not worked on it at all for months.  Like a number of people, they showed up and collected generous pay checks and did nothing.  She had looked at a number of websites and she had been told the company wanted one both internal and external customers could log into.  Her chief difficulty at the moment there was that there was very little content.  She decided to send the three complainers out tomorrow to take numerous pictures of the thirty acres  Or was it forty?  No one seemed to care. She cared, because she needed to get it right.  She debated outsourcing the website to a company, but first she needed something to outsource, and before then she needed to decide whether to keep these people.  She didn't need to mess with them.  So she decided to recommend they hire an experienced website developer with management skills. Would such a person come to Millville?  The schools were good, because the company had poured money into them, and the streets were well paved.  The company had bought all the abandoned houses and maintained them, hoping someday they would be filled again. Millville was crime-free.  People did not lock their doors. Neighborly. Very conservative, but in a good way.  Hard working, ethical, honest. Maybe the Chinese money was corrupting the town?  Not sure.  So she thought they would hire someone, even if it were a remote position.  She would rather have them here, but she would take what she would get.  That would move the website out of her hair. Secondly, she needed an effective presenter.  She could not do all these presentations herself.  She had natural talent but a lot could be passed on. She needed another Mary and another Brenda, or their understudies, effective hardworking people.   Bob. Was he okay with this?  He said she was Management.  Was that a problem?  And she was now earning a ridiculous salary, which she put down to company dysfunction more than anything she had done.  Was that a problem? She was not sure.  He was highly competitive and he had that male ego.  She did not.  A feeling of guilt rose.   Her therapist had brought up her feelings of guilt about not making Dad's expectations, never being the man Dad wanted her to be.  She never could, and this physical evidence backed that up.  What would the doctor say?  She thought about it, and that her therapist said she needed to find a sexual assault survivor's group more than a transgender group right now. Was there one here?  She thought about serving in a women's shelter.  There was one here, oddly enough connected to the church they had visited.  That F on her drivers' license would help.  She was waiting until after she talked to the doctor again to move on that stuff.   Was Bob really buying 160 acres near the old air strip on speculation?  Much of the land around Millville had been for sale for a long time.  That land was being offered at a dollar an acre, the owners having inherited it and now living out of state. Common knowledge.  They would take the first offer, and it had been for sale since the airstrip closed twenty years ago. Airstrip.  That would help.  Not tonight. Focus, girl, she told herself, and read over her notes to do so, which were making less sense the further down she went. It was eleven, and she gave up and went to bed.
    • violet r
      .my name is violet. I'm new here and thus is my first try at forums. I'm 45 and just recently having came to terms of who I really am. Thought a lot of self discovery since I stopped drinking. Drinking was my coping mechanism to hide a lot of thing. There were plenty of signs though the years. As I look back. That i hid inside. Now really sure what made all of this bubble to the surface at this time in my life.  Mabye it was waiting for me to be open minded and ready to accept that I am trans. I have a very unhealthy environment at home that is anti trans. I really don't know what else to say but hi. I hope everyone here will be accepting of me and me work through my journey of finding the real me. I know that since I accepted it I have been much happier than I can remember. Being to real me makes me happy. I hate having to hide this all the the time at home. I work retail management and have no idea if I could even stay in this business if I am to fully come out. Wow that was scary saying all that. It's a first for me
    • Ivy
      It is a lifesaver for a lot of us.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Thanks.  What I do as a man is what a woman would do if she were a man.  There is just something feminine about the way I act as a man.  It's not that being a woman is actually better, or something to aspire to, but it is just that I am one, while not being one.   If beating my head bloody to get rid off this stupid dysphoria would fix it I would find the nearest wall, but I know that if I did that, when I woke up, it would still be there.   If I did not have this struggle I would be someone else and I would be less of a person than I am.  They say an oak tree growing in an open field is far stronger than one in a forest.  The storms come and go and I stand.   This forum is the first time I have interacted with other people struggling with the same struggle and parallel struggles. It helps.
    • Ashley0616
      I'm sorry! :( Hopefully something better will come up
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