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Good morning All. Coffees on.


KymmieL

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1 hour ago, Carolyn Marie said:

Congrats to your sister, AYS.  I wish her much success

Yes.

 

Welp….  Gonna do my nails and go over to the coffeeshop.

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Just now, KymmieL said:

I fear with the arsehole winning. The writing is on the wall for us. At least for the next 4 years. That he is going to do anything in his power to get rid of us. Sad to say. However, we will survive and weather this storm as well.

 

Hugs,

Kymmie

"We will face some difficult times but we are a community that supports and lifts each other. Yes, together we survive and become stronger." ❤️

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Now hopefully price of building materials will go down next year. I have been furious paying more for lumber, anything that is wood and drywall and it includes some of my friends whom are contractors. My customers understand why the bill is a little higher.

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I have spent the morning crying, worrying about all the people we’re going to lose; hoping one of them isn’t my trans son. He is so scared and it hurts so bad. He’s already been on the precipice once before, I am terrified he’ll feel that way again. 
 

And do I get a new passport with my birth name but new markers? Would that not just make me an easier target? This move has sucked up all my time, I haven’t been able to get anything done. Do I legally closet? How emboldened will the haters be now?

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I did my nails, and went out for coffee.  When I got there I unexpectedly met a friend (not trans but queer).  We had a good talk - kinda consoling each other.  That helped a lot.  My plan had been to crawl up into a ball, and cry.  But I do feel a little better at the moment.

We live in a very red county.

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Found out I have two new jobs starting next week, both trashed rental houses. Landlords of each liked my bids from 2 weeks ago and going to be more money for me.

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Just now, hailey said:

Landlords of each liked my bids from 2 weeks ago

I'm glad it's going well for you.

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9 hours ago, Davie said:

"We will face some difficult times but we are a community that supports and lifts each other. Yes, together we survive and become stronger." ❤️

Yes, we will.

 

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Just now, Ivy said:

I'm glad it's going well for you.

It has and learned well from my step father. They had bids way too high from other guys wanting to do other work too not needed. Plus I have repaired their shotty work

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I will be building a supply of hormones until I can’t get them anymore.  My prescription is for one vial a month and up to now I have been only filling it when necessary.  Now I will fill it monthly per the prescription, until I can’t.  My insurance doesn’t pay for estradiol of any type so it isn’t a problem there.  
 

for those who have no other source, there is a for profit company called queermed that for a monthly fee will monitor your levels and prescriptions but I would consider them to be a last resort for us and maybe a first resort for someone over 18 just starting out.

 

I can’t get my PCP to reply to my question if she can or will take over.  And I don’t feel I can wait until my appointment in December.  Late November and early December are going to be a whirlwind of Dr appointments, cardiologist, lab work, PCP, CT scan, Ultra Sound, vascular surgeon, and I still need to schedule a mammogram and bone density scan and a colonoscopy.  Ugh!

 
 

needless to say, I am very concerned about what will happen over the next 4 years and if the damage to civil/human rights can be turned around again anytime soon.  Girls and women are already suffering, clearly we are next on the hit list.  It reminds me of the days when gays could be arrested just for congregating.  
 

my depression which had been completely under control to the point I was considering reducing my medication, is raging.  I had people throwing their excitement over Trumps win in my face yesterday.

 

what a terrible day it was.

 

willow

 

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Sorry for being such a Debbie Downer.  You all know I’m normally very upbeat and happy I guess this goes to show just how down I am.  I even have tears forming and my wife is being more than helpful today..

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Just now, Willow said:

Sorry for being such a Debbie Downer.  You all know I’m normally very upbeat and happy I guess this goes to show just how down I am.  I even have tears forming and my wife is being more than helpful today..

 

No need to apologize.  This is stressful for all of us, so if venting helps, go for it.  I think we all understand.

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Just now, Willow said:

 I had people throwing their excitement over Trumps win in my face yesterday.

 

what a terrible day it was.

I'm so sorry.  Sometimes people just suck.

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Just now, Willow said:

I will be building a supply of hormones until I can’t get them anymore.

I've been thinking about this myself.  Sometimes I use one less patch than the prescription to let my supply build up.

They had already talked about cutting trans care out of VA.  Now they'll be able to do it.

I guess I'll have to find a dealer.

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This morning did not go well this morning, had my 2nd work van towed to the shop. Drove to the job site and suddenly no brakes, blew the right front brake hose. Good thing is I have towing in my vehicle insurance policy. Mechanic said my employee was smart not to drive it. Did get it in and said to replace the left side as well which did happen.  I was behind my employee when it happened too

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@haileyIt’s good that you mechanic was able to help as well as you being behind your employee when it happened. It’s always difficult when having vehicle problems let alone work vehicles. I’m glad everyone is safe and it was an easy and inexpensive fix. Have a better day today and a good weekend 

 

Silas

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Just now, SilasG said:

@haileyIt’s good that you mechanic was able to help as well as you being behind your employee when it happened. It’s always difficult when having vehicle problems let alone work vehicles. I’m glad everyone is safe and it was an easy and inexpensive fix. Have a better day today and a good weekend 

 

Silas

I was glad too,costs me money when my work vehicles are down. My mechanic knows me, fix anything else wrong  found too with no questions asked. Their mechanic that replaced the brake hoses noticed a little play in the left front wheel bearing too putting in a new wheel bearing too. Safety is very important for me and it was not also safe with that bad wheel bearing.

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Went to the next job I am doing on Monday and it is on hold.I found mold in one area and did call the customer on it, Customer had a mold removal company come out and they are going to do it on Monday removing the mold. Luckily I wore a mask seeing it, allergic to mold 

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@hailey thanks for keeping or getting us back on track.  It shows us life can be normal.

 

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Well, I am about half way done with the 20 days of 12 hour shifts. With having to work 12 hours in a weekend. Thankfully, I have Monday off. Which I stated to my supervisor that I am not working on Monday, being it is Veterans day.  They actually gave both us in the Shipping and receiving dept off Monday.

 

Since I wound up going to the VA ER on Wed. On suggestion from my Dr. For my swollen lower right leg. Did the follow up with my new Dr. today. God, I love my medical team at the VA. So kind and accepting all of them. From my medical Dr. Nurses, The speech therapist, even my Mental health caregiver.

 

My leg is healing. But she was concerned about the swelling. I need to wait for the antibiotic to work its magic.

 

Hugs,

Kymmie

 

 

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Well, today was an interesting day.  I woke up feeling odd, I looked at my clock and I was already 5 minutes late for work.  I jumped up with an expletive. Ran to brush my teeth threw on some cloths and out the door.  I got to work 2minutes after I was supposed to open.  I immediately realized I had forgotten my glasses. But the store was fully open only 3 minutes late.  After that the day went smoothly with my wife bringing me my glasses about 3 hours after I opened.  I used the camera on my phone to magnify things I couldn’t make out until I had my glasses. 
 

all things considered I got my morning paperwork done, took an inventory that came out right all while handling customers.  As good as any day that didn’t start this way.

 

 

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Ended up going bra and panty shopping as Hailey. Found out the place I go, new owner is friendly and she said I am welcomed in still and happy about that. I did a lot of washing due to the purchase and threw out the old ones that were bad.Also bought a couple new corsets as well to replace two of them 

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Putting in plans for next month, dressing as Hailey on the 22nd through the 31st. I do this every year since 10 years ago  since it is my Christmas break I need. Mom and my sister like it too having time with me as her

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This morning did not go well.  GF was in one of her moods.  Wants me back in my girl form like when we met, wants my hair longer, wants me to dress "like an adult", etc.  She tried to wrestle female underwear onto me, even though I definitely wasn't having that.  I curled up in my nest, being generally uncooperative.

 

So, she goes to my husband to continue the drama, complaining about MY attitude.  My husband just asks her, "Well, what were you doing?"  He knows I don't get nippish unless I'm provoked.  So she sulked for half the day, making snide comments at me.  We sort of made up this afternoon, but she's still a bit difficult. <_<  Yeah, I live with a 30-something woman who acts like a teenager.  I love her, but days like this I need some space. 

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Friday the "mental health issue" was brought up by my doctor again. They seems to think that my dressing and living as female when I was identified as male at birth is a mental health issue. They had sent me to a psychiatrist a couple years ago that was supposed to treat me for my gender dysphoria by "fixing me." After only two visits with that woman, I refused to ever go back.

 

I'm sitting in my doctor's office with all natural F cups, a uterus, and hips and butt that would put the Kardashians to shame, and he has the gall to tell me that me feeling like a female is a mental health issue?

 

He said, " transgenderism is a fad/ phenomenon that will soon be passing. It's going to go out like Disco, and won't I be left feeling silly then?"

 

Under my medical plan I have no other choice in my medical provider, and that really sucks. 

 

Welcome to Texas!

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      Yes, I agree that it can be very annoying, not to mention hurtful if it's done with malice.  A real friend or a nice coworker would not keep doing that.   Carolyn Marie
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      Welcome, Oli!   This is a great place to explore your identity and bounce ideas off others on similar journeys.  Thank you for introducing yourself.   Kathy
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      I’m Oli (they/she/he). I’m from British Columbia, Canada. I started exploring my gender during college. I was pretty lucky to have a safe space try out different pronouns, and to explore binding and seeing how I felt in different gender presentations. It was an amazing experience until my parents found out. Their negative response was pretty difficult for me at the time. Now as a couple years have passed, I have settled into the term Genderfluid to describe myself. I’d say that I range from feeling more like a butch woman, to a Demi-boy to someone with no gender at any given time. Occasionally I even feel like a femme princess for like 10 minutes and then it passes haha.  I tend to fixate on hair and clothes sometimes, as if finding the perfect presentation will fix everything, but I don’t think the perfect presentation for me even exists. And it’s exhausting and just unrealistic to have to focus so much energy into correctly deciphering what my gender is every day, dress accordingly and then know that it might change throughout the day. So I mostly try to just work on feeling confident that I can be any gender no matter the clothes I’m wearing or my haircut.  Anyways, I feel most myself when I’m gardening or volunteering on a farm, dancing or sipping some cream of earl grey tea. I’m lucky to be out at work, in a very inclusive environment and most of my coworkers use my pronouns. My partner is also extremely supportive and I am so grateful for that.  I’ll end this here, sending solidarity to you all.
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      yet ironically for me synthetic hormones produced the best outcome, i am very cautious under the current climate (and movement against the existence of transgender) We seem to have moved from the reason why we are taking hormone therapy and now as i call it in the UK we play the numbers game we seem to have become trapped in a range game (female range) rather than our real reason is to align our bodies not to match a female hormonal range . 
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