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KymmieL

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@ElizabethStar HUGS, I'm so sorry you're having to battle through this negativity. Hang in there, my Suzie use to smoke and is still not very motivated to take care of herself heath and fitness wise, but I love her Forever and Moore. We were at Bed Bath & Beyond last night and I picked up a pair of Silk Pillow Cases and she rolled her eyes. Then as we were leaving she pointed out an eyebrow facility next door and asked in a very facetious tone if I would like to go have my brows done? My response was not yet. She quickly responded oh are you waiting until I'm gone? I replied, I don't ever see myself living without her. That bugged me all night, so I tried to revisit her comments it this morning and she just brushed me off. Like your wife, my Suzie sends so many mixed messages. Sometimes supporting my fitness attire and the more feminine look. Then she'll bash my hair style choice, because it's to girly. I don't feel like I'm walking on eggshells or moving to fast, until she wakes up on the wrong side of the bed, and we've had separate bedrooms for years. We're empty nesters and live in a three bedroom ranchhouse, and when my weight was up near 300 lbs. I would snore and she would elbow or kick me and neither of us would get any sleep, she moved into a bedroom of her own and we both get rest. Friends asked about sex? We both respond "we're empty nesters and don't have to wait or meet in the bedroom or for bedtime. However if I go to bed and she's in my bed? Party on Garth! Same goes if I'm in her bed. 

 

Hugs,

 

Mindy????

 

 

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@ElizabethStar

    I was married to someone that tried those same tactics about the things I wanted. I hate to say it but, that never changed. It was her nature to try to control me. The flurry of anger, that came at me when I said I was done, was hardly unexpected. You deserve much better than that. It is a sign of an issue that goes beyond being trans in my opinion. There are so many ways people decide to push their agenda on others. I was complacent for many years and tolerated how one sided things were for way too long. If you draw a line and say how you expect things to be fair, you might get that. It is absolutely your right to expect a fair and honest two way road. I really hope you have better luck than I did. Alternatively, I drew my line and was ready to prove how important it was to me that I be with someone that would treat me with a loving hand. I've had my fill of heavy handed narcissistic a-holes. It wasn't what I wished would have happened but, I stood my ground and did what had to be done. I am much better off knowing I respect myself enough to want a healthy love life or none at all.

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10 hours ago, LaurenA said:

I've read that doing hotdogs in an air fryer gives them that "cooked on rollers" taste  I don't own one so I can't give you a first hand opinion.

I am so gonna try this.

 

I tried to talk to my wife today. Things never go as planned. She just doesn't want to talk about me. Reluctantly I agreed to hold off for a couple of months on changing my name. Also, she agreed that when we meet any new people she will let me introduce myself since she has such a problem using my name. I am not a happy girl with the way things turned out or where they look like they're going but at least some progress was made.

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Hi  everyone

 

I have been on the road all day so I haven't read your posts.  We are home safe now.  

 

Yesterday, was my granddaughters 14th birthday.  We all went out to dinner.  When we were getting ready to go my daughter called to me to come to her room.  She says to me, we talked and want to ask Willow to join them for dinner.  I had to say I was sorry but Willow didn't come to Virginia.  (my wife and I had agreed to that in advance)    But the good part of this is again it shows my daughter has accepted me as have my granddaughters.  Very happy trip for me even if I was dead self.  That no longer mattered since I was being accepted.  Next time, Willow will go and dead self will stay home.

 

Busy week.  Lots to do with 10 days to foot surgery and 8 weeks of no walking or driving.

 

I'll read and respond more tomorrow.

 

Happy Willow

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When I read some of your posts it makes me sad, and then grateful I have a partner who is accepting of who I am. It's not without it's moments but all partnerships have times of differences of opinions, so finding the middle ground is something we both have to work at and might take a few days, we do get there though.

 

The weekend was crazy busy, mulberry picking and jam making. netting the grapevines, nectarine and one plum tree (we have 4), then pick up all the fruit (apple and pear) the parrots and cockatoos have spread around. This year the apple tree gets a prune to bring it under control. Finally got all the garlic and onions tied and hung up in the back of the pantry.

 

Then we had our lovely friends around for lunch on Sunday. They are the only ones who know Robin and it was lovely to be able to relax with them. Good laughs were had and some drumming talk and playing as she has a lovely middle eastern drum. Chips from the local takeaway and ham left over from Christmas makes a great lunch.

 

As I write this my thoughts are drifting off to the year ahead. Waiting on my letter for the GP and Endo, and hoping my electrolysis lady is okay. This year is very likely going to be my coming out year and if I can keep my courage I will be going full time by the end of the year. Should make Christmas family dinners interesting ??

 

One step at a time, look forward and remember the lessons from the past and smile at everyone (they wonder what you've been up too ?). I read a lot of your posts and I draw strength and knowledge from them even if I cannot find the words to say at the time, so many thanks.

 

Hugs

Robin

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Oh yeah, I forgot. I had to do a little shopping and wore the skirt I bought the other day. I was a little apprehensive a first  but as I was getting out of my Jeep at the store I decided I would just own it. I didn't feel awkward or out of place roaming the store. I just felt like some random girl out shopping and loved it. I did however notice my thighs rubbing together a little as I walked. Maybe I should wear leggings or something next time. I got a lot of smiles and unexpected politeness from other women. Only one person gave me a double take. Well actually a triple-take, maybe I got clocked, don't care.

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1 hour ago, ElizabethStar said:

 I did however notice my thighs rubbing together a little as I walked. Maybe I should wear leggings or something next time.

Yes I definitely recommend doing that. I always wear leggings under every dress or skirt - for warmth and comfort, and to lessen my anxiety a little. It's wonderful to hear that your first trip out wearing a skirt felt natural, and that you got a warm reception from other women in the store.

 

Also I'm glad to hear your wife agreed to let you introduce yourself going forward. I hope that'll stop the hurtful deadnaming, and that this becomes a starting point for future conversations.

 

Love,

~Audrey.

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Maybe we need to start a thread about our other half and what problems they are? LOL.

 

Had a great weekend. took the truck out on New Years day to play a little in he white stuff. and no I didn't get stuck this time. :P Then yesterday, I was supposed to have a appointment at the VA to get my cpap re-certified. but about 45 mins before I was to leave. I get a call. it is my respiratory technician, and being I am not on O2 I was able to do it over the phone. 

I did take off early as my middle son and his two sons came to visit. So it was great having my grandsons here. I even told my youngest grandson 9mo that Nana loves him.

 

So early to bed tonight so I can get to work early and get some stuff done before we open. I expect a call from the anti coagulant clinic they must be about either my anti clotting meds or my E. I guess I will have to explain everything to them. Hope they will approv my getting E.

I would think that they should agree. as my Endo is also a VA provider and my hematologist is not only a MD but a professor. I think he knows a little something being he teaches future Drs.

 

I will post up what happens tomorrow. Then Tues is my phone interview with the PD. I hope this week turns out great.

 

Kymmie

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9 hours ago, KathyLauren said:

I got the snowblower dismantled enough to remove the drive belts.  They do need to be replaced.

My son told me the auger on his machine wouldn't turn so I took a look the other day.  The belt was worn.  I picked up a new one and a drive belt too.  Got them for mine also since who knows when they were last changed.  I usually only use the snowblower once or twice a year for light coverage but my skid steer loader is still out having seals and bearings replaced.  With the red ATF that it uses it would look like a murder scene had happened in the driveway!  

 

You're a better woman than I @KathyLauren.  I can only shovel the brick walkway before my back says enough! 

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9 hours ago, ElizabethStar said:

Only one person gave me a double take. Well actually a triple-take, maybe I got clocked, don't care.

 

Maybe they thought you were just that hot. I'm REALLY bad at telling when people are interested.

 

Hugs!

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2 hours ago, Jackie C. said:

Maybe they thought you were just that hot.

I'll buy that. I did look pretty cute. And no one else gave me a look because they know I'm unobtainable and out of their league. ?

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sheer or color-matching tights are very helpful when wearing a skirt and weather is less than hot to help with rubbing. Also, they feel awesome ?

alternatively, you can try the shapewear in a shorts style which would serve the same purpose but can also adjust other dimensions.

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12 hours ago, ElizabethStar said:

Oh yeah, I forgot. I had to do a little shopping and wore the skirt I bought the other day. I was a little apprehensive a first  but as I was getting out of my Jeep at the store I decided I would just own it. I didn't feel awkward or out of place roaming the store. I just felt like some random girl out shopping and loved it. I did however notice my thighs rubbing together a little as I walked. Maybe I should wear leggings or something next time. I got a lot of smiles and unexpected politeness from other women. Only one person gave me a double take. Well actually a triple-take, maybe I got clocked, don't care.

 

Awesome! If I can clock someone but they're out there being themselves it just makes me really happy to see.

 

I definitely recommend shorts or leggings, because it's rough in the warmer weather. I picked up some bike shorts to wear under my skirts and dresses. They are made for moving and sweating so I don't have to worry about walking around downtown during the summer months. I also don't have to worry about being up on the second level at my job and having people staring up at me. They have a nearly useless shallow pocket on the back of them, but it's more than my skirts have (which is zero pockets) so I just walk around with my cell phone sticking out the back at work.

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Good morning everyone,

 

The coffee was early, HOT, black, and strong. It's back to normal workdays for me until February 24th - March 1, 2021. This is a long standing (40yrs) family and friends trout fishing trip to WildCat Shoals in Flippin, AR. Yes we eat lunch with the Flippin Police, and the Flippin Fire Dept. it's a Flippin good time. To attend our annual fishing trip you must be over the age of 21, because when the older folk run low on adult beverages, you the new and youngest must run into town.

 

I heard a college football coach say in an interview this weekend:

"If you're at your lowest point in life? It can only get better."

 

Hugs, best wishes, and positive thoughts,

 

Mindy???

 

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Good morning everyone 

 

Can i bum a cup of coffee this morning, im all out.

 

Ah, spelling, caps and punctuation will be hit and miss today. Sorry.

 

wow, i missed a lot yesterday.  Liz, that is not good especially after you just bought a home and moved.  Im sorry 

 

mixed signals? My wife is full of them.  Just when i think things are going well, she will switch on me.  “I misunderstood “

 

between my anti depressant and HRT ive been pretty mellow so mst of it i am able to let go.  I think im starting to see consistent mood swings between shots. Nothing serious but I need to start tracking as it would be good to know.  Time to get ready for my coffeeless day.

 

hugs

 

Willow

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Good morning all! Not much to say in way of what I have planned for today, but I’m reading all of your posts and I hope everything is well for everyone at the moment despite what has been going on.

 

Hope you all have a good Monday!

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5 hours ago, ElizabethStar said:

I'll buy that. I did look pretty cute. And no one else gave me a look because they know I'm unobtainable and out of their league. ?

 

They were looking out of the corners of their eyes. Check Out the Pretty Girl: Advanced Technique.

 

Hugs!

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Just talked to my anti coagulant pharmacist.  He is wanting to get so farther info on my Dr. Request.  So he is doing a consultation with one of the national transgender teams about it. He is thinking maybe doing a full dose of E. And possibly a different coagulant med. 

 

May have to wait a little bit longer.  I've waited 50+ years so another week won't kill me. So this girl is still  happy. 

If the VA flat out says  no. I still have outside vendors. The war against the my maleness is coming to an end.  The girl is winning.  LOL.

 

Kymmie 

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1 hour ago, KymmieL said:

Just talked to my anti coagulant pharmacist.  He is wanting to get so farther info on my Dr. Request.  So he is doing a consultation with one of the national transgender teams about it. He is thinking maybe doing a full dose of E. And possibly a different coagulant med. 

 

May have to wait a little bit longer.  I've waited 50+ years so another week won't kill me. So this girl is still  happy. 

If the VA flat out says  no. I still have outside vendors. The war against the my maleness is coming to an end.  The girl is winning.  LOL.

 

Congratulations! In the war against your maleness... nuke it from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.

 

Hugs!

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Good morning, 

    @Willow The best I can do is offer you this picture of coffee.

http://www.photographyblogger.net/wp-content/uploads/2009/05/coffee-cup4.jpg

 

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Hi everyone, happy Monday.

 

First workday of the new year for me today. It's been pretty hard to focus. Feels like a combination from coming off of a natural lull during the holidays, new demands from the powers-that-be for the new calendar year, and being preoccupied in my head. I'll find my focus soon, just need to summon that energy and find the place to start that gives me a little sense of progress and accomplishment. It did help to take a short walk outside a bit ago and get fresh air, it turned into a sunny day here in NYC.

 

@Willow  Coffee-less day? I feel your pain - hope you make it through! Audrey no function coffee well without.

 

Love,

~Audrey.

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20 hours ago, ElizabethStar said:

Oh yeah, I forgot. I had to do a little shopping and wore the skirt I bought the other day. I was a little apprehensive a first  but as I was getting out of my Jeep at the store I decided I would just own it. I didn't feel awkward or out of place roaming the store. I just felt like some random girl out shopping and loved it. I did however notice my thighs rubbing together a little as I walked. Maybe I should wear leggings or something next time. I got a lot of smiles and unexpected politeness from other women. Only one person gave me a double take. Well actually a triple-take, maybe I got clocked, don't care.

Good job just owning it! Confidence is everything. Glad you punched past the caring of being clocked.  I don't even notice whether people are looking at me anymore. I feel great, so that's all that matters. As far as leggings, shorter skirts and cold weather I wear some tights or hose but wth maxi's just wear undies.  I wore Kilts for years so kind use to the thighs touching.

 

12 hours ago, Jackie C. said:

 

Maybe they thought you were just that hot. I'm REALLY bad at telling when people are interested.

 

Boom!

 

8 hours ago, Jandi said:

I might just be weird, but feeling me thighs together doesn’t bother me.   

Me neither

6 hours ago, KymmieL said:

The war against the my maleness is coming to an end.  The girl is winning.  LOL.

 

Take no Prisoners!

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Abi and Audrey, thanks for sharing your coffee with me.  LOL.

 

While I like wearing tights or similar when appropriate to what I am wearing I don't have issues with my thighs touching or rubbing.  @Bri2020  My son and I had kilts made by Slanj and picked them up in Edinburgh.  we had to order them a month in advance to have them done by the time we got there.  

 

We wore them when we visited the castles and when we went to the Sterling games and the Edinburgh Tatoo.  Now I wear mine to church on the appropriate Sundays.  I wear knee high socks with the kilt.

 

@ElizabethStar just  behaving like you own it is the only way to be when you go to a store or mall.  The more you look around the more likely you are to see questionable looks.  Do you pass?  Were you clocked?  if you don't pay any attention, you won't wonder.  Just do what you want to do. Bri is absolutely right.

 

Willow

 

 

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Wish me luck I sent an email to the hr department at my work In regards to coming out. Hopefully it goes ok

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