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Good morning All. Coffees on.


KymmieL

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2beBreanna

@AmberM
good luck with your hr meeting.  stay calm and be yourself.

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Willow Farmer
11 hours ago, Willow said:

I got a PA around about 2010.

What an interesting conversation!  I've found larger gauges and choices in jewelry make  peeing more predictable.   I've always sat to pee, but most of the time I'm just outside and go with the flow.   Really easy with a skirt and no panties.  Having a ball unscrew and roll out on the floor at work isn't good.   I like the 2 piece rings that screw together with an allen screw.  I carry an allen wrench in my wallet.  

   ---Willow McKenzie---

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Good morning everyone,

 

Coffee:coffee: today is Folgers Black Silk served HOT, black, and strong.

 

Best wishes, stay positive, and safe.

 

Mindy🐛🌈🦋

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13 hours ago, Willow said:

Back to piercings

I had one ear done back in 72.   Then both a couple years ago.   I keep playing with the idea of something in the nose, but am afraid it might just get in the way when things get messy.

As for this PA thing… I believe I'll pass.

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Heather Nicole
5 hours ago, AmberM said:

some new jewelry for my appointment to get my ears pierced this Saturday. I am super excited for it. I got two sets of butterfly earrings (different stones), some horseshoe shaped, and one that I am kind disappointed based on size, but it is a fox. I am looking forward to crossing this new threshold.

 

Ooh! Congrats! Earrings are really fun. I got mine done back in November. Just watch out for things that might snag them! Especially while they're still healing.

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Bri2020

Mixed bag of news.

My insurance, while willing to pay, won't even start the authorization process needed to even talk to a doctor about my facial surgery until 1 year of HRT.  The "authorization" may take up to a few months and the surgeon isn't even predicting a wait time any more because they are so busy (previously it was 4-6 months)   I am trying to fight with them since HRT doesn't do -crap- for bone structure and WPATH has no requirements around eligibility. I had hoped since my therapist recommended my eligibility that they could at least get started so I could get surgery shortly after my 1 year mark but now it's looking like I won't be able to until next summer.  They won't let me start any other surgical consults/authorizations until that surgery is completed. Given wait times, it may now take up to 3-4 years for  FFS, GRS and BA.  I went down such a deep spiral after all that that I spent the afternoon crawled up in bed crying and didn't come out until this morning.

 

This morning I decided to skip the insurance system for my BA and I now have a consult with a plastics guy in May to talk about the whole process. We won't decide on anything definitive regarding size until September which will be a year of HRT.  I should have most of my development done by then and he offers a guarantee for 3 years.  If you aren't happy with the size he doesn't charge for revisions except the cost of the actual implants. That way if I grow beyond what I want we can go down a size and he will do a lift if it becomes saggy as a result.  Gonna cost me $7k but I would rather that then wait years while my other procedures are in the works.

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KymmieL

It is sad to see that insurance companies are running our lives. As they can tell us when we can have corrective surgery to correct a lifetime defect. 

 

Not much going on here. My wife is kind of back to almost a pre-comming out stage. It seems like they have accepted that I am Kymbrill at work. I have worn my work shirts at home. My son even teased me about how I spelled my name on my shirts, Kym instead of Kim.

 

Kymmie

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Linda Marie

Hi kids, I love reading your posts here. I don't have anything going on today so I'm posting a video.

 

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Linda Marie

This next video I'm dressed how others want to see me. I took one of the big guns down for this one.

Love,

LM♥️

 

 

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Not much going on here. My wife is kind of back to almost a pre-comming out stage. It seems like they have accepted that I am Kymbrill at work. I have worn my work shirts at home. My son even teased me about how I spelled my name on my shirts, Kym instead ofKim.


@KymmieL I guess it’s the best you are going to get for a while.  At least you are able to wear your shirts, and the teasing is better than ridicule you were getting.  I hope it continues without setback.

 

Willow

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Bri2020

I needed some therapy today so I went to the salon. I had to break in a new stylist, my old one departed :(  Shortened the locks by about an inch and reshaped things. I like it. I think I will keep her ;)

DFED0578-1F50-44D4-95D6-0B594C157EF4.thumb.jpeg.5b28d77b12fac019479c853d7aa884ed.jpeg

2D857FAA-3C07-41EE-9C75-101C7C239ED5.jpeg

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Linda Marie

Your hair is lovely, 

 

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Elizabeth Star

Today turned into well, interesting. I had to get to work at my normal time since went had some storms and they were afraid the phones would be ringing off the hook. Thankfully all was quiet and I was able to leave late morning to head to the courthouse.

 

After some trials I found my way to the correct Clerk's office. They were insistent that fill out the paperwork there even though I already had filled out copies with me...whatever it's done, it's filed. My court date is June 24. I know it's only 2-1/2ish months away but feels like 100 years.

 

From there I went to get a 2nd Covid test. Got in, got out, got lunch and back to work. Surprisingly I was only gone for 3 hours.

 

Two and half hours later I still hadn't gotten the results from my "one hour" test so I called. I got passed around to 3 different people. The last one told my to try calling the main number. That's where I started. Frustrated I gave up. On the way home at 5:30 I finally got the results. Of course they're negative.

 

Getting the petition turned in was huge and I feel a renewed sense of myself. I'm feeling peaceful again.

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10 hours ago, Elizabeth Star said:

 

Getting the petition turned in was huge and I feel a renewed sense of myself. I'm feeling peaceful again.

Congrats Liz!  This reminds me that they make us jump through so many hopes and challenges but once it's finally done we feel so good.  Remind me I said this every time I freak out about roadblocks ;)

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Good morning folks. It feels so good just to read all the posts. It's a positive kind of meditation where I stop judging myself for a few minutes. Judging myself for feeling sick and having no energy these days. I have allergies, but I know how to take care of them generally. However, now I think I'm having side-effects to the meds I take. Glad a birdy had me check those and I have most the list. That's an easy fix. I stopped taking it, so I hope I'll feel bette soonr. See? I just accepted the situation a bit, rather than try hard to control and fix it . . . and the answer came.

Meditation: Just sit down and shut up. That's my plan.

And GenderPulse of course.

Hugs, all.

Davie

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On 4/8/2021 at 5:12 AM, AmberM said:

 

**sits down coffee cup**

 

Good Morning all, hope you had a decent evening last night. Yesterday was a great day, I put in my petition with the state to change my name, and it has been approved which means it is now a case. This feels like such a huge win already, and puts me that much closer to living as Amber full-time. Then we had to go pick up a “lost” package from the Postal Service, which had some new jewelry for my appointment to get my ears pierced this Saturday. I am super excited for it. I got two sets of butterfly earrings (different stones), some horseshoe shaped, and one that I am kind disappointed based on size, but it is a fox. I am looking forward to crossing this new threshold.

 

**sips coffee**

 

I am still kind of nervous for tomorrow, when I come out to HR. I am not looking forward to it because it is being honest and open to a new person, and I am also still not sure what I am expecting out of the meeting, which I think is the worst part. I don’t want to set the bar for success to be super high and just get squashed, but I don’t want to have a meeting of just coming out and nothing really happening. I appreciate all the people who have already given their input. It just still is something on my mind, which is the only reason I share it in my morning update.

 

**sips coffee**

 

I hope everybody has a good day, and if that is too much, I hope you have a manageable day. I appreciate everybody in the community.

 

That's great! I just got my application acceptance for name change and motion to waive publication yesterday. It was real quick. Today, hopefully I can co to clerks office to file for court date. (The person who handles that was off yesterday). 

 

Hope it goes well for you.

 

Jamie

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11 hours ago, Elizabeth Star said:

Getting the petition turned in was huge and I feel a renewed sense of myself

That is an amazing feeling, isn't it? I am so happy for you that you were still able to get the petition turned in and they actually scheduled you for a court date. I haven't seen a court date for mine yet, if I don't see one in a couple of days I may reach out directly to see when they think it will be.

 

Today is the day, I am coming out to HR at least and I am starting to feel the slow ratchet of anxiety build up this morning. I am thinking it will go well, though my brain says otherwise at times. I am ready to come out and start being Amber, who will be happier than {deadname} was because I am not wearing a false disguise that I have to keep up.

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11 hours ago, Elizabeth Star said:

Today turned into well, interesting. I had to get to work at my normal time since went had some storms and they were afraid the phones would be ringing off the hook. Thankfully all was quiet and I was able to leave late morning to head to the courthouse.

 

After some trials I found my way to the correct Clerk's office. They were insistent that fill out the paperwork there even though I already had filled out copies with me...whatever it's done, it's filed. My court date is June 24. I know it's only 2-1/2ish months away but feels like 100 years.

 

From there I went to get a 2nd Covid test. Got in, got out, got lunch and back to work. Surprisingly I was only gone for 3 hours.

 

Two and half hours later I still hadn't gotten the results from my "one hour" test so I called. I got passed around to 3 different people. The last one told my to try calling the main number. That's where I started. Frustrated I gave up. On the way home at 5:30 I finally got the results. Of course they're negative.

 

Getting the petition turned in was huge and I feel a renewed sense of myself. I'm feeling peaceful again.

Yay! You got a court date. Here in Livingston County, they make you e-File your application. Cost $321.02. 

Did you file for motion to waive publication? That part was free to add on to my case. You can do it any time before court.

I live in a town that isn't friendly towards trans people. My wife was afraid of discrimination.

 

Jamie

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@Linda Marie You sound great and I love your style!  I understand about how others want to see you but hopefully that will change in due time.  Have a fabulous day!  

 

@Bri2020 Your new hair style looks great and will be good for driving around in your convertible! 

 

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2 hours ago, Jani said:

 

@Bri2020 Your new hair style looks great and will be good for driving around in your convertible! 

 

I like the cut but I will style it to come forward a bit over my forehead so that it masks my more masculine forehead structure and hairline. Can't wait for that to get corrected.

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4 hours ago, Jamie68 said:

Yay! You got a court date. Here in Livingston County, they make you e-File your application. Cost $321.02. 

Did you file for motion to waive publication? That part was free to add on to my case. You can do it any time before court.

I live in a town that isn't friendly towards trans people. My wife was afraid of discrimination.

 

Jamie

I got a court date of June 4th. Yay!

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So the meeting with HR has come and gone. I think it went pretty well. I basically told them that I am transgender and that I am working on socially transition and the next step was work. We chatted a bit about where I am at, what my goals were, and she was going to investigate a few things, like what some other policies and procedures that may exist from other trailblazers. We talked about my plan to come out with my boss and then some of upper management depending on how it goes with my boss and what his thoughts are as he knows his boss better than I do. Our next touchpoint/check-in is going to be on Wednesday, so we'll see what happens from here.

 

There is some relief to the anxiety, but it isn't a complete fix though to be honest. That was the easier transaction versus coming out to my boss. Then talking to my team, then the rest of the department. So yeah, lots of work still, but I can breathe I guess that at least something has moved somewhat.

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1 hour ago, Jamie68 said:

got a court date of June 4th. Yay!

That is awesome Jamie, congrats! That is super exciting.

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Way to go @AmberM, that took a lot of courage.  I suspect once you talk to your boss, the rest will be much easier.  I certainly found that the more people that knew the easier coming out to the next person/group  was.

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  • Posts

    • Jackie C.
      Well, you are a woman. Good on him for noticing though!   Hugs!
    • Britney Summers
      Hello again, thanks for the tips. I haven't gotten lipstick yet. I have to make sure it is something that comes off completely and quickly if need be. I need to get a whole make up brush set and all that and go learn from youtube.
    • 2beBreanna
      Thanks.  I will look into these. Not sure how many places we are looking for yet but it will probably be 4.. one for each week in june.
    • DonkeySocks
      Hey, this news (long time coming) made me smile. Sounds like you are in a good place emotionally and physically.
    • DonkeySocks
      Sounds like a great day. Thanks for sharing.
    • DonkeySocks
      Oh, and I think a loose, long skirt looks more gender-neutral than a form-hugging knee-length skirt, when you have thigh/hip curves. Kinda draw the eye down to the lower leg instead of sticking at the curves.
    • DonkeySocks
      Plaid flannels in a size or two larger than your usual shirt size. Lace-up boots or ankle-high shoes, even if you're in a skirt. A masculine hat over the short haircut. Turtleneck shirt or sweater. Leather bracelets/wristlets or a masculine watch. So many people associate skirts with females that they will gender based on the skirt without looking at anything else, but if you're in pants, a hat can really help. Also, straight-cut jeans look more generically masculine than sweatpants do, I think. You will have to experiment with size because of the men's jeans not being made for your hips. If you live in an area with a farm store that sells Carhartt brand jeans you might try those.   When you want to look twink and still make people do a double-take, you might try a hat, a button-down shirt that's more dressy than flannel, but still a size or two larger so it won't fit your curves too closely, and high-top shoes. All that with a skirt. Also, plaid skirts might make people think more masculine, depending on the color.
    • VickySGV
      The Scots and Irish, and gay men I know wear a Kilt which is a skirt of sorts.  I have a couple used for various statements I like to make. Mine are not tartan plaid, one is black and another is a pinstriped fabric, but definitely male attire to most people.  For me they are gender neutral.  Utilikilt and Stump Town Kilts are where I have gotten mine.
    • VickySGV
      National Center for Transgender Equality (HQ in New York, but active nation wide) Transgender Law Center (San Francisco based, but active nationwide.) Trans Life Line which is listed on our page in Suicide prevention   Local LGBTQ Centers have Trans Programs, and can be found here: https://www.lgbtcenters.org/LGBTCenters Donations can be earmarked for Trans Programs.   Equality Texas is working to help Trans and Families in the current legislative maelstrom.   I will quit there, because there are many groups that will be happy to receive donations.    
    • 2beBreanna
      Hey all.  My company has started a business resource group for LBGTQ+.  I somehow managed to get picked for a chair position on the board.  We are just starting things up and will be discussing plans for pride month this week.  Part of what the company is looking to do is make a donation to a LBGTQ group that supports the community in a positive way.  Something that is nationwide or west of the Mississippi River would be preferred.  So far we have suggested PFLAG and Pride Sports USA.  What other groups would you all suggest. I would like to find something more trans related to suggest to the group.  Even if it's something local we can look into it.     I am sure I will be looking for more help as I go through this journey as I am newer to the group.  Thanks in advance for all you all do.
    • Susan R
      What used to work for me early in transition before ‘something’ shrunk into obscurity, was a medium absorbency pad along with a moderately tight pair of panties. I would wear that to the gym and I had no issues with bulges. You again look great as usual.   Susan R🌷
    • Elizabeth Star
      Thanks everyone. I do like this outfit but the downside is keeping the parts in place all day. I know I could wear a pair of two of tight undies to get the same effect but I’m weird and don’t like panty lines in leggings. I just remembered I have some cutoffs I could try this with when I get rid of these pasty-white winter legs.    I love this thread. Everyone has great looks. 
    • Davie
      A Believing Sonnet  Numbness is close to godliness when I miss you.  Feeling is believing when you speak to me.  At lunch my hands keep busy spooning miso soup,  as I count noses, yours and mine don’t equal three.  What women wear means nothing to my poetry,  but I remember all the dresses you wore this fall,  as if outside visions of cotton mattered to me— 
 as if a fitbit counted important feelings for all.  Do brown leather boots with black heels mean  anything to a small wallet and a phone poem?  I count the times you smile infinity beams 
in disgust at my hope to dispatch all wrongs.  My feet don’t remember bread gave them power.  My words don’t know how I can love the hour.   —— Davie     
    • Beatriz
      Wow, that sounds great! Congratulations! I'm very happy for you.
    • whatishappening
      Thank you!
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