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Good morning All. Coffees on.


KymmieL

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Yeah, I've had problems as well.   I had recently up dated my OS and was suspecting that.

It's been working for me this morning.

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11 hours ago, Petra Jane said:

'Fraid not, our server is under attack and our server gurus are working hard to rectify this issue.

Thank you @Petra Janeand server gurus.

I love you to death. Can't say enough about how beneficial this site is to me, and my coping mechanism.

 

Mindy🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋💖

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On 5/25/2023 at 12:10 PM, GlitchedSalvation said:

Feeling excited, I've got Robotics at the high school today

 

@ShawnaB Awesome! I'm glad your family and these people are so supportive!

The community I am in is 100% open about LGBTQ people

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  • Forum Moderator

Well I've been having some pain in my left wrist. Even a prescription Hydrocodone wouldn't help. So, Headed out to the Cheyenne VA. Got in quickly. Diagnosis carpel tunnel, I've got a wrist brace to wear at night and some topical treatment. When I finished seeing the DR. They gave me my after visit summery, which had all my prescriptions on it. Including, my new E script, which I have been waiting for.  SO I asked the pharmacist about it. 15min later I find out the review group in Minnesota turned it over to our medical center to work out dosage vs anti-coagulant. 

 

So, I am just waiting for my topical treatment. I get called to the window. OH, they are not done with your yet they are adding other things. I wind up getting my months worth of E shots. Now I become a pin cushion.

 

Hugs,

Kymmie

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Been packing for my trip to the UK ahead of time.Getting excited to have my make over done over there.Leave for the airport on Tuesday morning.Wife will be getting me to the airport

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Good morning 

 

I too have had intermittent issues getting on but I trust the server team.  They’ve always fixed it before.

 

Got my Botox injections into my larynx yesterday.  Good thing too as I have been having lots of muscle spasms causing me to be unable to speak.  I finally got a better schedule.  More morning shifts less late shifts.  I work all weekend but at least it is 7am to 2 pm so I get the better part of my day off.  As a matter of fact, I need to finish my coffee and go get ready for my shift.

 

Remember those friends we lost, regardless of which action it was.  For me, it was Vietnam.  Several friends lost to fighting and one to agent Orange.  He would help load it on to the planes dispersing it.  Not his job but he had nothing better to do on his time off from regular duties.

 

very rainy here 3 to 5 inches expected before it’s done.

 

Willow

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Good morning, everyone! The sun is shining....and I was finally able to get back into the forum so my smile is shining. At one point this morning, I couldn't even access through my cell phone which routes thru Verizon's servers. You've all become such a part of my sanity and support system that I worried that I'd not be able to get back here. I know the admins have to do whatever is needed to protect us all - and the forum - and I'm very thankful to have a chance to check back in.

 

Hopefully, whatever they come up with will allow me to maintain access. But, thinking that I might not get back on made me realize that I needed to thank all of you who have helped me, encouraged me, consoled me and laughed with me over these past 4 months. Your encouragement made me stronger and saved me early on. Please know that I will always be thankful for that.

 

In the meantime, I'm going to relish every moment I have here with you all.

 

Smiles, happiness....and a skort with a t-shirt and flip flops...is the order of the day.

 

Be safe and find the goodness in this beautiful day. Believe me, it's there.

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39 minutes ago, April Marie said:

At one point this morning, I couldn't even access through my cell phone which routes thru Verizon's servers. You've all become such a part of my sanity and support system that I worried that I'd not be able to get back here. I know the admins have to do whatever is needed to protect us all - and the forum - and I'm very thankful to have a chance to check back in.

I had the same problem.  I was really bummed out.  Y'all here are my main support these days.  I live in a very red area, and while most people around here are not personally hostile, they are don't understand being transgender at all.  I've heard there may be a couple trans folks in the area, but I have no contact with them - and they are much younger.

I was so happy when I was able to get in here this morning.

 

I have gotten the impression that the site has been under an attack of some sort?  IDK, not a computer geek myself.  But I would hate to completely lose contact with people I depend on to maintain what's left of my sanity.  If anyone would like to exchange emails or something, in case worse comes to worse, they can DM me.

 

There seems to be a concerted effort to attack LGBT+ people and supporters now, and transgender people in particular.  I don't like the feeling of being isolated.  I wonder if that is the intent.

 

Nolite te bastardes carborundorum

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When I couldn't get access yesterday. I worried some, however I knew that Petra Jane would come through and get us up again.

 

All of you are my family. I can be open and my true self here. Something that I can't even be in my own home.

 

I just wonder how many of these haters have dealt with a trans person and never knew it. We, like everyone else in the world come in all shapes and sizes. What I look at is there are CIS females that are pure and simple ugly. Some manly some ugly and feminine CIS males. Do I make an ugly woman, probably. so do some other females. Would I want to look like a 20 something Hottie. Yes. Daily, I see a woman and wish I looked like them. Alas I am just me. I don't have the disposable income to look like that. I wish. but I am me.

 

I am that young cute girl when I write. I am the person I writing about. In my stories, I can be beautiful, talented, rich, even deadly. Anything I can think of. The only limit is my imagination.

 

Off my soap box and headed for the kitchen for coffee.

 

Hugs,

Kymmie

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Hi everyone

 

We (30 of our friends and neighbors) had a cook out/eat in yesterday evening in celebration of Memorial Day.  They honored the four of us who are Vets and were there.  Hot dogs with chili, meatballs, potato and macaroni salad, deserts and wine.

 

Yes, this is important to all of us to be able to talk to each other even about things you can’t really share with family.  I know my family doesn’t really fully understand.  It’s nice being able to open up here.

 

Unfortunately, we are going through a period of intense hatred.  Just look at all the people who are shooting kids just for going after a ball the is in their yard or being killed just for pulling into a wrong driveway.  Or police officers shooting a child with his wants up after his mother’s boyfriend was fighting with her and the boy called 911.  Way too many people have become killers of innocent people.  Yes, I am aware of transgender friends beginning to arm themselves for self defense.  
 

Certainly, we are being challenged by people who are buying into the hatred and lies.  If they find us and our website there are a lot of ways they can attack even a denial of service attack.  
 

Willow

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Mom did order me 3 new maxi dresses,she knows I love Maxi dresses 

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21 minutes ago, ShawnaB said:

Mom did order me 3 new maxi dresses,she knows I love Maxi dresses 

I love it!!! My wife ordered me a LBD, yesterday. She's known I've wanted one and found a nice one while looking at JJill online.

 

I just got out of the pool for the day, watered the flower beds and as soon as I feed the dogs I'm going to get ready for our Happy Hour - planning on wearing my light blue crop pants with a new navy popover with embroidered flowers on the sleeves.

 

Heaven on Earth.

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Still struggling with the fact that my daughter (18 yo) isn't talking to me at all these days ... My wife and I haven't been doing well at all (after I told her I like to wear women's clothes), and she outed me to the kids. My daughter apparently blames me completely for the marriage going south. We were so close up until all of this. I just can't believe how much I am being vilified while my wife just ignores all of her issues because they are much less sensational...

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My nephew Johnathan was the first to call me Aunt Ashley. I didn't know to cry or be extremely happy to finally see a family member recognize who I actually am. My second ex and I have become friends but I think it was only because we have kids together. She had her top layer of her right eye damaged really badly. They removed it and at first didn't give her any narcotics. They just gave her ibprophen. A couple days later they finally gave her some good pain medicine. Last Friday the doctor gave her his personal cell phone number because he was concerned about it. Saturday came around and it didn't get any better so they removed the lens that was protecting her eye and gave more eye drops. I don't remember any of the technical terms but I do know that she is in a lot of pain because I had eye surgery too. It was kind of nice because I was able to spend more time with the kids on Saturday while she went to the appointment. I'm just now on my second cup of coffee because I forgot to clean out the reusable k-cups. Which I am thinking about just using regular k-cups instead after I finish up my coffee grounds. Church service was great I'm glad I changed to an affirming church and they even remember me. I'm not just a number. I do like the modern Christian music but the old hymns are nice too. Thank you @April Marie I'm definitely glad to get going and can't wait to see what the good Lord has planned out for me. I sure was wondering what happened the server. I did a check up on the internet and it wasn't on my side. It said that it was the site that was the problem. 

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Oh I forgot to mention that I might have a female partner. We are currently just friends but we do love each other. It can't be anything more since by law I'm considered separated so still married. Which I can't wait to take things to the next step. She lives in Colorado and I live in Mississippi. This is my second attempt at long distance relationship so hopefully it works out. Her name is Cindy. We met on Plenty of Fish dating site. She did have a relationship where the other girl was in Germany so this is no where near as long distance. I get to talk to her grandma since her parents died. I can't wait for that. I'm hoping that she will like me. 

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@EasyE it's going to take time and hopefully they'll come around. I understand how you feel. I lost my third wife over it. We are getting a divorce. Then again I didn't tell her I was trans. I don't get to see her boy anymore. The good thing is that my second wife hasn't put in hate in our kids. Which I think she doesn't do that because she knows that she relies on me a lot. Just keep praying and it will work in God's time. I think another thing that your 18 year old is struggling with is why didn't you tell her earlier. It's not easy finding something big happening when you get to that age. Also hopefully in time you won't be stressed out because you were living in secret. 

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36 minutes ago, Ashley0616 said:

@EasyE it's going to take time and hopefully they'll come around. I understand how you feel. I lost my third wife over it. We are getting a divorce. Then again I didn't tell her I was trans. I don't get to see her boy anymore. The good thing is that my second wife hasn't put in hate in our kids. Which I think she doesn't do that because she knows that she relies on me a lot. Just keep praying and it will work in God's time. I think another thing that your 18 year old is struggling with is why didn't you tell her earlier. It's not easy finding something big happening when you get to that age. Also hopefully in time you won't be stressed out because you were living in secret. 

Thanks for the encouragement. Down deep I think my daughter is mad at me more because she sees my marriage with her mom disintegrating and not so much because of the clothes thing (she has trans friends for goodness sakes!)

 

Ironically, she and her mom fight like cats and dogs EVERY DAY. I have always been the peacemaker. I have always been the one defending my daughter because her mom is very strict with her. Yet, she has chosen to abandon me completely. I don't get it. She won't even hear my side of things -- we haven't talked since my wife outed me to her... 🙁😞

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17 minutes ago, EasyE said:

Thanks for the encouragement. Down deep I think my daughter is mad at me more because she sees my marriage with her mom disintegrating and not so much because of the clothes thing (she has trans friends for goodness sakes!)

 

Ironically, she and her mom fight like cats and dogs EVERY DAY. I have always been the peacemaker. I have always been the one defending my daughter because her mom is very strict with her. Yet, she has chosen to abandon me completely. I don't get it. She won't even hear my side of things -- we haven't talked since my wife outed me to her... 🙁😞

She needs time to process like I said. It's rough because all she has known is you two. She is going to quickly find someone or something to blame. I don't I would take it personally yet. She'll give you a chance. 

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@Ivy 

 

Hi Ivy

 

I am trying to help a mother who needs an endocrinologist for her teenage daughter, Bella.  The endocrinologist they were talking to has decided to no longer treat teens.  That seems to be a growing problem.  Do you know of any endocrinologist in or near Ashland that might be willing to take a teen patient?  
 

thank you.  Willow 

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My dad and I did talk with me as Shawna.Said he will always see me as a part time daughter as Shawna to the day he goes.Plus my relationship with my brother is going great still.Did put the past behind him for good,said that old him is dead.

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3 hours ago, Willow said:

Do you know of any endocrinologist in or near Ashland that might be willing to take a teen patient?

I'm afraid not.  I would suggest Asheville, but even that is a pretty good drive.  What about Boone?  It is a university town.  

I get my HRT from the VA  in Asheville.

I'm actually in Cleveland County, close to the SC border myself.

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Good morning, everyone!!! It was so refreshing to sit down at the computer and find you all here this morning - thanks again to our Admin team!!!

 

Yesterday was a beautiful day spent at our pool followed by Happy Hour and a light dinner with my wife out on our patio. I decided to wear the new popover I got recently - Navy Blue with embroidered flowers on the sleeves. I changed my avatar picture to one wearing the top - I think it's just gorgeous...the top...I'm just the old grandmother wearing it. 🙂  We ended the evening sitting out drinking wine and watching the sun set. I am so very blessed.

 

I always struggle with Memorial Day here in the US. While it's become a day of BBQ's and fun for most, it is a somber day for me as I remember The Fallen in our militaries including some friends lost along the way. I, ultimately, have decided to make it a celebration of their lives and sacrifices. I'm here because of their sacrifice - and I have been given this opportunity to explore and become because of them, as well. Salute to all those who made that ultimate sacrifice for us.

 

So, today I will spend some more time working on my tan by the pool. We plan on making burgers on the grill for dinner...and, perhaps, another evening of watching the sun set with a glass of wine and the woman I love so dearly.

 

Be safe, everyone, and find the goodness in this day we've been given.

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Good morning y'all!

 

I'll be home all day, but maybe some friends might come by to visit.  I don't get out much anymore, so it is what it is. 

I have plenty to keep me busy if I really wanted to, but sometimes a lazy day around the house with a warm cup of coffee is rewarding as well. 

I just looked in the mirror and I can't believe that just a year ago I was pretending to be a man dressing in bib overalls to hide my breasts. Those overalls weren't working anymore (growing spree) so they went on a shelf, and I let my hair grow. Now I look like a completely different person.  I have always felt more female than male, so now I'm just letting my body lead the way. I do hope my body decides to stop soon, my breasts are large enough already and big breasts do get in the way. 🙄

 

Have a good Memorial day y'all!

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Good morning everyone,:coffee:

 

Here in the USA it is Memorial Day. I'm up early because on this day we remember those who died in active military service. I fly a flag day and night, with 24 lighting. I also follow daily flag protocol. On this day the flag should be flown at half staff from sunrise to noon local time, then risen to full staff briskly. I never served in the military however I'm honored and motivated to fly this flag for those who served.

 

I hope everyone has a wonderful safe day.

 

Mindy🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋 

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17 minutes ago, Birdie said:

Now I look like a completely different person.  I have always felt more female than male, so now I'm just letting my body lead the way.

Good morning Birdie,

 

I'm glad you are reaching those physical goals of looking like the female you've felt like.

 

Hugs,

 

Mindy🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋

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    • Carolyn Marie
      Herzlich willkommen, Alessia. I don't speak German but Google Translate usually works well enough. I know how hard it is to talk about something that you have kept so well hidden for so many years.  But you are in a safe place here, and among friends.  So thank you for opening yourself up to us.  You will find that many here share some part of your life story.  Your father sounds much like mine - and he was also from Germany.    Please ask whatever questions you might have.  We will do our best to answer, even if we have to do some research to get you the right answers.   HUGS   Carolyn Marie    
    • Tilly
      Hi Christina,   Great questions and post!   I've been using Sandrena gel for a few years, morning and evening. I've learned quite a bit about it along the way but Charlize is right that some or all of your questions are best answered by your doctor. That's particularly true for question 6) about dosing. So anything I put here should please be treated as non-medical and anecdotal. However, here goes.   I really like the sandrena gel. I like the steady state estrogen it gives me and I feel very adjusted to it. I mention this because I had serious fluctuation issues with injections and I am very glad I'm no longer taking pills because of liver concern (I know you're also taking progynova) and clotting. The gel seems to be a very safe method.   Personally I haven't noticed much difference as to where it's applied, with the exception of the abdomen. If you put it on there, which the leaflet says to do sometimes, then I am not convinced it does absorb so well because of the fat. I may be wrong about that so it's just my experience but my levels dropped when I applied it there. Otherwise I doubt inner or outer makes a lot of difference if you've got good circulation and you're fit. I expect the inner thigh is proposed firstly because that's where your femoral artery runs and secondly because you're less likely to rub onto someone else or something else. I am due blood tests a month from now so I can update on that but my levels have been good with outer thigh.   So ... I apply morning to the outer thigh and then in the evening I apply to the arm on the opposite side of my body. This is partly for practicality: in the morning I'm sitting up in bed for half an hour or so with a coffee so it's ideal. In the evening I may be anywhere, and applying to the arm is easy.   I always exfoliate, or rather, I have a lady razor in my shower and almost daily run this over some part of my body or other. It's not that I'm hairy, I just like smooth skin. And natal females do also use razors   I've not encountered any issues with this. So basically I shower first thing and then apply the morning gel. I have two showers a day because I always have a workout in the middle of the day.   Whatever the leaflet says, I do spread it a over good open hand width (two small closed hands) - so a reasonable area. I guess maybe 4" x 10". I don't think I'm allowed to tell you the dose (am I?) but it's not just one sachet in the morning.   I do slightly rub it in. I was advised to do this, whatever the leaflet says, and  it undoubtedly helps it to dry more quickly. When I say 'slightly' I mean just enough to stop it looking like I've lathered myself in turkey fat but it's still a thin film or sheen, and still very tacky.   I have to say that although occasionally I've had to put clothes over the top after 10 minutes, and the leaflet says this is fine, I try not to. Usually I don't cover it for half an hour, especially in the morning. And I don't shower or bath again for at least six hours.   I hope some of this helps?   xx      
    • Carolyn Marie
      Thanks so much for all the good work you do here, and for our community, Vicky.  Big congrats on another anniversary in this fine place.   HUGS   Carolyn Marie
    • Alessia
      Vielen lieben Dank   Thank you for the lovely lie about my english I really appreciate it.   I am eager to meet my fellow german speakers and I am already making lots of progress I guess. I will keep trying to sort things out this is why I have to write some letters and eventually make some dates with specialists in my city to observe my situation. I am glad I finally trust my inner voice.   About the close friend that will be a tough one but I hope I can tell him about my feelings and thoughts.  
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      Herzlich Willkommen!  🙂   I don't have more than a few words of German, but your English is quite good.  We have some other members on this forum who live in Germany, and I'm sure you'll get a chance to talk with some of them.  The cool thing about being on here is that there's lots of people from around the world, of different genders and cultures and ages.    It is a good thing to have a close friend that you can talk with.  I hope that you are able to improve your life and feelings and find peace. 
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      I don't have much relationship experience outside of my current family....and nothing real before age 26.  But from what you describe, here's my take:   Your GF probably shouldn't be talking with somebody in a seemingly romantic manner behind your back.  But how far she has been going is kind of an unknown.  Perhaps there's an innocent explanation, perhaps there isn't.  You don't know.   She handed you her phone, so either she didn't think you'd go through it or she legitimately thinks she's being honest and has nothing to hide.  You don't know.    So, there's two major unknowns and I sense quite a bit of anger and mistrust.  No matter who is right or wrong, does that sound like a healthy environment for either of you?  Since your first sentence mentions her as your now "ex" girlfriend, is that something you regret?  If she's not in your life in a romantic way, is there a need to continue feeling angry, or would it be better to find a way to move on and forgive? 
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      Maybe, but maybe not.  I know a city near me in my deep red state where it could happen.  Although it is just as likely that there wouldn't be any demonstrators from either side standing outdoors, as most folks are too busy working.    I wonder if in the areas where one of the sides is more in the minority, that minority is more vocal.  At least around here, it is the minority of loud radical leftists (and less often, loud ultra-right supremacists) that usually create the conflict and disorder.  Perhaps California has the same issue with a minority of loud right-wingers?  I think there are folks who believe that volume makes up for lack of numbers. 
    • VickySGV
      Oh heavens, 12 minutes away from my house.  I think more will come out on this, and I do think the ones with the fists deliberately came to make trouble and show it off.  When they pan out on the shot though, the actual number, while violent were small. 
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      @Willow  Wow.  That's some difficult stuff to process.  I hope the family has strong bonds and a good support network.  Whether the overdose was accidental or not, taking large amounts of a substance usually is intentional for some reason or other.  Folks typically don't do that because they're feeling good about themselves....and its a sad thing when it ends badly.    I know puberty is a mess for just about everybody, but it is triply messy for those of us who don't know what we are, can't figure it out, or know for sure but can't do anything about it.  I wish our society could approach adolescence with a bit of flexibility.  People are seldom the same at 18 or 28 as they were at 13. 
    • VickySGV
      That is what my Profile says is my Joined date for the Forums.  I went back and found my first post in the Introductions Forum.  What an adventure, and the Members and staff here have made this a special place for me ever since.  Somewhere in that time I got asked to be a Moderator and most recently one of the Admins.  WOW, both a significant responsibility and sometimes a totally heartwarming and uplifting set of feelings.  Thank all of you for taking part in the Forums and letting me be part of your lives on your paths of discovery and growth.
    • missyjo
      clapping n whistling  hugs
    • Carolyn Marie
      The only difference between this scene and one in a deep Red state, is that in a Red state there wouldn't be any pro-LGBT demonstrators outside the school board meeting.  BTW, Glendale is considered a "very liberal" city as far as voting.  I therefore think quite a few of these folks were from outside the area.   Carolyn Marie
    • VickySGV
      One of our maxims here on the Forums is that IF you have any questions at all about your gender, you are NOT Cis Gender, and thus Trans Gender.  What we can't say is exactly what you are under the Trans Spectrum, that is a journey for you and a therapist to go on and discover.  Where are you going to take your Trans self to be comfortable and authentic is the real question.  It can be as little as the decision to be less like your birth gender's expectations of behavior, profession, trade and possibly your family care role.  These are mostly a matter of attitude.  They can go to complete Transition on the other end.  Give yourself permission to act as you feel without shame and you are on your way.  Stick around, read what is here, find a Gender Therapist, don't overthink life or try to be what is uncomfortable and BE YOU.
    • Charlize
      It is certainly good news.  Federal judges have been instrumental in civil rights for a long time.  Pity that 45 got to appoint so many as McConnell had blocked so many nominations by the Obama administration.   Hugs,   Charlize
    • Charlize
      Tiffany i remember feeling much the same.  I only allowed myself to go out as myself when i was far away from my neighborhood.  Perhaps that was good way to gain confidence but ti was difficult at best.  When i did go to local gay bars it seemed quite safe.  after all if someone knew me there....... why were they there?  I kinda figured it was a mutual silence thing. I'm glad you have your wife there with you.  Being with another woman makes it much easier.  Most of all try to enjoy yourself!  It was an amazing, if at times scary, journey for me.   Hugs,   Charlize
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