Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Finding Your Personal Female Style


JohnniGyrl

Recommended Posts

I suppose this is really aimed at those of us who wish to step out as female in public, or already have. ( My greatest respect to those who have. )

 

In my early years of crossdressing behind closed doors 'just for me' - style didn't matter one iota - any female clothing was good enough. It was just a big thrill to own anything female; panties soon progressed to stockings, suspenders, skirts. That eventually led to bras, blouses, heels, jewellery, make-up - the whole nine yards! Again, colour co-ordination of matching of anything didn't matter, as nobody else would be looking. The skirts were as short as they could be, the tops as skimpy as possible - everything was ill-fitting and all over the place. Still, it felt great to wear any or all of it, even if I must have looked a mess! It was the feeling of the various materials and how it also made me feel inside, that mattered.

 

Fast forward about thirty years...

 

Now that I've finally admitted I'm transgender & I'm thinking of stepping out - it's a whole new ball game. Size matters with clothing it seems and so does everything else. I'm getting my head round wearing neutral colours and perhaps only one brighter or patterned/floral design in an outfit. Age appropriate clothing too - mini skirts don't work so well for the more mature woman, so I've been buying knee-length and midi skirts in prep for the big day... Overall, the wild, wanton look will have to stay behind closed doors where it always was, or only come out at nightclubs, gigs, rock bars etc... ( If I ever get the chance to frequent them again. )

 

However, I find I'm actually having fun learning style, fashion, correct make-up tips etc... for a more sophisticated look that aims to pass, or at least, gain acceptance. I'd say i'm happy in a Boho/Hippie or Rock Chick zone for casual wear, though I'd love to rock the classic or office/librarian look as well, though not sure if I could pull that off.

 

Everyday is a school day though & wow, is this a learning curve! 

 

Keep on, keeping on ladies! 

 

xoxo

 

Link to comment

I found when I came out that I had no clothes. I did have clothes mind you, but not the right clothes. Try to keep it simple. Jeans, tees, blouses, flats if you’re tall, shorts, etc.... it’s fun having skirts and dresses and heels and all those things too, but if you truly want to come out you’ll need lots of simple easily matchable clothing. Rebuilding an entire wardrobe is a tedious and expensive process. You don’t want to draw a ton of attention to yourself. There is an awkward phase that we all go through. The younger you are the faster that seems to go by. But you’ll get plenty of looks during that time without dressing  with flair. Most days you’ll just want to fit in. 

And above all, HAVE FUN!! Just because it’s expensive and sometimes difficult doesn’t mean you can’t have some fun too. My bestie goes shopping with me all the time now and she really helps me make it fun! Good luck!! 

Link to comment

The big day came for me a little over a year and a half ago.  The first day of the rest of my life, the day from which point forward I was never going to dress as a male again.  It was also a work day.  In the months prior I had of course talked to all my bosses, colleagues and people in my life who would be impacted by this decision.  At that time I had also been on hormones for about a year and a half and it was beginning to get difficult to hide the physical changes to my body not to mention the lack of facial hair after laser and electrolysis treatments had removed most of the heavy beard shadow that had always been there.   So when I left work on a Friday there were no surprises for anyone when the next Tuesday following a long weekend I walked into work presenting as a woman.    Like you Johnni my wardrobe was a mix of all kinds of clothes that I had randomly purchased over the years.  Very little of it suitable for living full time as a woman.  Prior to my first day of work I  had studied how the women in my office dressed as well as how other women my age presented themselves in public settings.  I realized I would pretty much need a completely new wardrobe for this new life.  Of course, as elsewhere, mostly women in my office dressed in jeans, leggings, capris or other casual clothes.  I think in the first year living as a woman I wore skirts and dresses far less often than I ever had before.  It just wasn't what I observed women wearing.  I must admit that I really relished the few occasions when events presented themselves that required women to dress up.  A conference I attended for work that had a gala dinner at a local museum.  A business trip to the UK where I was told that formal business attire would be expected.  It still amazes me at how little time it took for me to dislike heels after having to wear them every day for eight to ten hours.  At the end of the day I could never wait to finally be able to exchange them for something flat and comfortable. 

 

I've been told by my wife that I am still a bit heavy on the make up.  Its an insecurity of mine.  Without the make up I tend to still see mostly the old me, the male me, the male face I hated my entire life.  Hopefully in time I will get past that and cut back on the amount of make up I wear daily.  Also, in this past  year and a half, I've had to profusely apologize to my wife for giving her a hard time, in the past, for her taking so long getting ready to go out.  I take much longer now than she ever did getting ready in the morning.  To her its now a great source of amusement.  

 

That said, I could never imagine going back to my life before.  It literally feels like the days are sunnier, the colors everywhere brighter and I can never recall being this happy in my entire life before.  

 

 

Link to comment

Hello JohnniGyrl:

 

I was much like you when I thought I was a cross dresser and just got clothes regardless of style and size and loved how to me they looked so cute and pretty and loved how they made me feel like a woman.  Which must be why I never was really a cross dresser cause I always tried to have me be a woman.  But anyways, behind closed doors myself I had the weird clothes that would not be appropriate out in public.

 

But as I came out and now that I am full time, I did start to get some clothes that I can wear out in public and blend in.  dont know what's it's like where you are at or the weather, but for my age group and I am in my late 30's, I find myself as a trendy casual girl and as such I tend to wear nice skinny jeans and a nice Tee or Cami and pair it with a caritiagan.I wear some comfortable shoes or if I am in the mood and I am tall a 1inch block heel.

 

If you are also into them, a nice pair of everyday leggings paired with some athletic shoes and a Tee works as well.

 

I have my own YouTube channel and I made a video on my experience with getting the basic's and something senisable.  Here is the link if you are interested in watching it and maybe it might give you some ideas as well.

 

 

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

It seems like a lot of us started the same way. I too have non age appropriate cloths. I have started to amass more casual cloths. I am a jeans and t-shirt girl. I need to start getting slacks and blouses. Of course shoes. Especially if I get the new position I am wanting. It is business casual. It is slowly coming then again so am I.

 

Kymmie

Link to comment

Hi all

Though i agree trend is good, i never was good at following or able to afford trend clothes, some of it was over rated anyway.  Plus i don't fully agree with wearing age appropriate clothing.  I think whats more important is dressing in whatever you want and whatever you feel comfortable in, something that definently feels you.. Even if its a mini skirt.. Check in the mirror see what you think...if you likevwhat you see...i'd say go for it...regardless of age...  So long as it"s decent and presentable then go for it..

 

Regards

 

Melissa

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator
16 minutes ago, MelissaAndProudOfIt said:

 

Though i agree trend is good, i never was good at following or able to afford trend clothes, some of it was over rated anyway.  Plus i don't fully agree with wearing age appropriate clothing.  I think whats more important is dressing in whatever you want and whatever you feel comfortable in, something that definently feels you.. Even if its a mini skirt.. Check in the mirror see what you think...if you likevwhat you see...i'd say go for it...regardless of age...  So long as it"s decent and presentable then go for it..

 

 

I have just seen this. I agree!

 

Interestingly I was checking through the wardrobe yesterday and came across the mini skirt that I wore on my first totally female outing. Apart from how short it is, I noticed how see though it is ? :D

 

Maybe that's why I go so much (positive) attention when passing a building site (rather scary at the time).

 

It is in my album but here it is:

https://www.transgenderpulse.com/forums/gallery/image/10934-lp-h-s-4/

 

Not obviously see through here but it is very thin. I will relagate it to a beach skirt over bikini bottom? It's too nice to throw out anyway.

 

Our early experiences :D

 

Tracy

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

I have items in my closet I bought like 10 years ago, and all I can say to myself is "what were you thinking back then ?"

 

Agreed wearing age appropriate clothing and dressing to blend in is the mantra....

 

Life is better as female, so many choices, so much freedom to express one's self, the possibilities are endless.

 

Enjoy

 

Cyndee -

Link to comment

I personally think age approprate as a term has only been introduced so the consumer market can yet again categorise part of its market.  By following set trends...you are to a point at a disadvantage, as some older stuff is more comfortable and definently more sexy and generally appealing.  Mass market materials mean clothing qualities never been poorer, design leaves a load to be desired..  Gone are the imaginative, creative, quality cut and sew of the 70s and early 80s. Its downhill... Though not all the way to bottom step yet......i yearn for the day we can once again go for a quality shop, maybe Brexit might allow us some passage in that direction, failing that i"ll go night classes learnto sew and design my own itemsand create my own brand..this i would do out of a feeling of pity for the fashion trade....these days in my eyes they really lack creativity, flair and imagination.   Lets bring those times gone back again...i for one might survive pah.lol

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Learning to sew allows you to repair, alter and make clothing.  I have sewn since I was a teen.  I have a free arm Singer that was bought new in the late 70's.   Its a great skill to have.   

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   1 Member, 0 Anonymous, 99 Guests (See full list)

    • MaryEllen
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      77.7k
    • Total Posts
      731.2k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      10,438
    • Most Online
      8,356

    MiraF
    Newest Member
    MiraF
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Benji C
      Benji C
      (16 years old)
    2. Christastrophic Kaos
      Christastrophic Kaos
      (33 years old)
    3. ChristianCorridon
      ChristianCorridon
      (26 years old)
    4. Elizabeth-pen
      Elizabeth-pen
      (15 years old)
    5. Paige Turner
      Paige Turner
      (73 years old)
  • Posts

    • Marcie Jensen
      @Willow even if it doesn't work, how cool to have an antique clock that belonged to your grandfather!!!!!! And, the memories it must evoke. How awesome!
    • MomTGDaughter
      I don't hear many taking about messaging the scalp which is what I have been doing for my m2f daughter who is 15 now.  Along with her taking biotin, blockers and  now estrogen, her hair is among the fullest of any girl is her class adn she has been able to grow it to her lower back.  Best of luck to all of you, you can only try your best and make sure you can do all you can. 
    • Heather Shay
    • Heather Shay
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      I identify with a lot of what you say.  My parents just weren't affectionate with me.  They were affectionate with my older brothers, and to some extent with my sister because she is the youngest, but I was mostly left out.  My sister and I are very close, and we were each other's sources of physical contact and warmth.     I didn't really have an idea of what normal parental affection looks like until joining my forever family and watching my husband and my female partners with their kids.     As an adult (sort of....as I dislike adulting), I'm probably needy and codependent.  When nervous, I immediately seek a partner to cling to and a lap to curl up on.  I can't imagine the pain of a breakup...that kind of loss would not be something I could survive.  
    • KymmieL
      That got me thinking. I don't believe I had my parents tell me I Love you. When my mom started about 3 years ago. It seemed strange but nice. It seems that the love was there, just not open.  My grandfather was the smartest man I have ever known. Showed me a lot. Being I was the only grandson. (I was back then, I guess.)   I guess that my life has been screwed up for a while now. I just want to know where the rewind button is?? Anyone?     Hugs to my friends,   Kymmie
    • Carolyn Marie
      First off, good on you to speak up and speak out, especially to folks who may or may not be allies or supportive of those under the trans umbrella.  Doing so takes courage.   I've spoken before audiences of primarily Gay & Lesbian folks, sometimes in a training setting, but sometimes in more casual situations.  It really has depended on the setting and the kinds of questions I and other trans speakers receive.  I try to explain about that "umbrella" business, and how that's much different than being either Gay or Lesbian; more amorphous, more controversial in some ways, and much less easier to define.  Even trans folk can't agree on definitions.   The important thing, for me, is stressing what we all have in common, and what our common goals are, and have always been; educating the general public, creating understanding, creating allies, reducing the hate.  That's common ground, and that we should all be able to agree on.   Carolyn Marie
    • Chanelta L.
      There were always examples, but not like you see them today. Things were kept quiet and people lived their lives out of the public eye. That went for all alternative lifestyles. At the machine shop my dad worked for, and I later worked at, there was a Lesbian couple who ultimately retired from there. I knew of them since I was very young, and somewhat understood what was going on, but nothing was really ever made of it, or really talked about it. They quietly lived their lives.     I mean the term Gay was rarely spoken. I remember my mother referring to Gay Males as a "Man's Man". I wonder how many here has heard that term. I have not heard it myself in at least 40 years. Chanelta
    • Davie
      I was kind of called out to speak for non-binary people today. It was a mixed LGBT group, but few were trans or non-binary like me. My friend who would have had a great answer, couldn't be there. I kept it brief so I wouldn't misspeak too much, but it was hard to speak to folks with 50 years experience as gay, but none with non-binary people. What should I have said? What would you do?  Thanks, Davie
    • Davie
      Barrett Strong, Motown stalwart who sang ‘Money,' for Motown, dies at 81.
    • Andrea Nicole
    • Willow
      @Marcie Jensen one of my most prized possessions is a mantle clock.  I knew the clock as belonging to my grandfather as a child.  The clock was passed on to me. It has a mercury weighted pendulum, chimes the hour, the each quarter hour.  I learned that it was a wedding present to my grandparents and dates to around 1900.  Unfortunately, my mother decided it needed some attention and took it to a clock maker.  I don’t know what he did but it hasn’t worked since.  I’d like like to see and hear it work again but I really don’t know who I can trust to be able to fix it, and I’d rather have it whole but not working than a pile of parts.   I have two even older pocket watches and a Scottish spinning wheel from around 1800 but the clock is number one in my heart probably because of the intense love between my grandfather and myself when I was little.  (Tearing up) and he died in 1957.   Willow
    • Andrea Nicole
    • MaryEllen
    • Mmindy
      Willow, my wife came from a family that did not hug or communicate emotional support for achievement. My family on the other hand never passed up an opportunity to hug one another. My mother would sing a song to each person who came into her kitchen. For us kids it was: “I love you, a bushel and a peck and an hug around the neck.” When my wife (then girlfriend) started attending family functions, she couldn’t believe how much we hugged each other. However she quickly learned to love it, and we still hug several times a day.    Mindy🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...