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Threatened on the street


ToniTone

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7 hours ago, Katie23 said:

Over the years I have seen a number of transgender patients who have been assaulted. I have taken care of some who have died from their injuries.

That sucks. I’m sorry to hear that.

 

Quote

What would be the worst if you did have the FFS first?

 

I’m planning on vocal surgery first. I don’t want to look “more feminine” before I sound more feminine. A few days ago, I was on the phone with someone and although I was using the highest-pitch voice I could realistically muster, they still kept calling me sir.

 

Plus, I’m not… super masculine looking. With the right makeup, I’ve had people ask at a party who “the tall, shy girl” was.

 

So I’ll be doing voice, face, top, then bottom. Although, despite not undergoing any form of trash counseling… if I could… I’d do voice and bottom surgery tomorrow. They’re the only two that aren’t dependent on what hormones give you.

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Phoenix,

 

I am kind of new here and I am not sure what may be conventional, but you bring up a good point. I had not considered voice before appearance, but hey, why not? 

 

On the avoidance of violence issue, yes, it is tragic to see someone with a fatal wound because they dare to be themselves. We still folks who are violent within our borders. I have no illusions on that. Where I live, we have a basically philosophy that nothing good happens after 11 pm. I avoid going out anywhere when it it late. My days of staying out late are over. I even avoid going to the convenience stores after dark. I am not sure it makes any difference. I also learned the concept of situational awareness. Be aware of your surroundings. 

 

I hope that you have nothing but success in your journey!

Sincerely

Katie

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13 hours ago, Katie23 said:

Phoenix,

 

I am kind of new here and I am not sure what may be conventional, but you bring up a good point. I had not considered voice before appearance, but hey, why not? 

 

On the avoidance of violence issue, yes, it is tragic to see someone with a fatal wound because they dare to be themselves. We still folks who are violent within our borders. I have no illusions on that. Where I live, we have a basically philosophy that nothing good happens after 11 pm. I avoid going out anywhere when it it late. My days of staying out late are over. I even avoid going to the convenience stores after dark. I am not sure it makes any difference. I also learned the concept of situational awareness. Be aware of your surroundings. 

 

I hope that you have nothing but success in your journey!

Sincerely

Katie


Thanks.

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I have been thinking a lot about what you said regarding voice. You are absolutely right about this. The more I have been digging around, the more it makes sense. People really do associate the voice with gender. I have seen a number of the videos and it is impressive as to the difference. I may very well go the voice route first. You are fortunate about not needing the FFS. Some of do and some do not. Thank you for your perspective. There have been some recent articles demonstrating the medical need for FFS, and I have to think someone will be doing the same for the voice surgery

Sincerely

Katie

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7 hours ago, Katie23 said:

I have been thinking a lot about what you said regarding voice. You are absolutely right about this. The more I have been digging around, the more it makes sense. People really do associate the voice with gender. I have seen a number of the videos and it is impressive as to the difference. I may very well go the voice route first. You are fortunate about not needing the FFS. Some of do and some do not. Thank you for your perspective. There have been some recent articles demonstrating the medical need for FFS, and I have to think someone will be doing the same for the voice surgery

Sincerely

Katie

Oh I definitely need facial surgery, believe me. It’s just that it’s not as vital a need as some. However, since I have zero makeup skills at the moment, surgery would at least feminize my face for the times when I didn’t feel like putting makeup on… working out and such.

 

I got a startling reinforcement of the voice thing last night. 


I’ve been in a hotel since August 9th. I changed my public appearance/presentation to fully female on August 28th. Since then I’ve had two incidents of an unhappy biological woman throwing a fit; complaining to hotel staff in one case and just angrily storming out and gesturing wildly to her husband in the second case.

 

To the hotel staff’s credit, the lady who complained about there being “a man in the ladies’ room” was met with a response of “No, she’s a lady and her name is (Phoenix).”

 

However last night made me nervous. There’s always a reception with drinks, snacks, soup, etc. on Wednesday evenings. Last night, I’d ordered my dinner a bit earlier than usual so I was in the dining area during the reception. At the reception was a family including (I assume) a grandmother, mom, dad, and 4-5 children, none older than say 9 or 10, if that. Well, I’ve been dealing with the fallout from therapy and extreme depression/anxiety lately so I haven’t shaved in awhile, though hormones have slowed my facial hair growth… three weeks will make things obvious regardless of hormones.

 

Anyway, the children were all over the place. And one was a “screecher”…. that age where they marvel at their own voice and how shrill and loud they can make it. Just when I thought one parent or the other was taking most of their kids back to their room, they’d come right back into the dining area.

 

After I eat, I always wash my hands in the ladies’ room before asking the staff for another room key.

 

As I watched the family come and go, I thought “Well… if there’s a night I’ll be getting my ass kicked, it’ll be tonight.”

 

I went to wash my hands without incident the first time, but forgot I still needed to wipe my mouth off with a paper towel. I did that and went back to re-wash my hands (OCD).

 

This time when I washed my hands, I opened the door and found myself face-to-face with the youngest daughter, the screecher. She looked up at me and I looked down at her and just said “Hi.” And she said “Hi” back. But, I guess because my voice normally goes higher than normal when I’m talking to kids the mother, who was standing right next to the child, didn’t say a word to me.

 

So either she was so focused on her daughter that she didn’t see my face… or she just didn’t care.

 

Either way, a night without getting my ass kicked by an angry father is a good night.

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