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By ElizabethStar · Posted
I work with a guy like that. He's been problematic since the beginning of my journey. Even had the nerve to bitch (literally does it all the time) at his supervisor about my low-ish-cut top. She pointed out the fact that she gave me that top and he had no problems when she wore it. -
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By Jamie68 · Posted
That's a GREAT story. Sounds like things are looking up for you. My wife is still in the grieving stage, but she is really making an effort to support me though. She calls me "Jamie" more and more often now. Small improvements are much better than no improvements. -
By Myles97 · Posted
Update 1 Yesterday (3/6) I worked up the nerve and came out to my mom and sister! My dad passed away in 2005, so I’ve officially come out to my entire “immediate family.” It was so scary at first. I sent them a text message (long letter type text) to our group chat, and then felt absolutely sick to my stomach. I wished more than anything I could unsend the text. But I couldn’t, and spoiler alert, in the long run I’m glad I couldn’t. I basically live posted on here on a different forum that I started on self doubt as I waited my mom and sister to respond. And it made the world of different having folks on here comfort me throughout the process. My sister called first and she told me she loved me, and that she was happy to have a brother now. She is so proud of me and so sad that I struggled in silence for so long. She said I can always trust her with anything and she will support me to the ends of the earth. She is an absolute gift y’all. My mom had still not responded by this point. I was really scared she wasn’t taking it well. So my sister called her to check in and they talked for a while. My sister called me back and said that mom had just read the text and wasn’t mad or disappointed at all. She was also sad that I felt like I had to suffer in silence for all these years. My sister said my mom still loved me and would like to chat if I felt up to it. But she understood if I wanted to wait and talk later - I’m glad she was patient and recognizing how hard this was for me. I imagine it was also a lot for her to process. I called her, and she and her boyfriend talked with me on the phone. She reassured me that she supports me 100% in anything I do, she just wants me to be happy. She also asked me to be patient with her as she learns my new name and pronouns. I told her of course, it’s a learning curve for my partner and I too. We will all get there with practice. I can’t even begin to describe to you the relief I feel now. I’m still scared that my mom is going to call and change her mind about being supportive - but that is my own anxiety I need to deal with. I am relieved, but I am also ready for some normalcy. For years I’ve struggled silently, for months I have processed out loud traumatically, and now I’m having to take something that was once my biggest secret and share it with everyone. It is freeing but it also makes you feel so incredibly vulnerable. And that’s a tough way to feel sometimes. But I am proud of myself and I am grateful to have a partner who has boldly stood by me through this entire process. I would have never worked up the courage to tell my family without her. If you would’ve told me years ago, months ago, or even two days ago that today I would be writing a post about how my family has said they love and accept me for who I am I would have never believed you. Again, that’s me projecting my own insecurities. But I hope that some of you can relate to this experience. And even if your coming out story did not start as happily as this one, that’s okay too. I am here for you all just the way you have been here for me. We will all navigate together, and we can be your chosen family. I am hoping that once I am officially out to everyone I will finally feel settled. I am tired of lying/hiding and the conversations of “coming out” are incredibly exhausting. Anyways, I’m on my way to normalcy and I am sincerely happy. And I am so happy my new normal is life as Myles. -
By Shay · Posted
Never heard before but perfect choice for early Sunday morning. Nice groove and layering as you said. Thank you. -
By Confused1 · Posted
That is definitely good news Kay. As you said, one step at a time! There were several times in the last year I didn't know if my marriage could survive, but my wife has moved a lot. It wasn't easy to get here. Praying yours does as well. Hugs, Mike -
By Drayse · Posted
Hi @Rei, welcome to the forums! 😊 Don't feel too put out about being 39 and just starting. Some of us are even older. -
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By Cyndee · Posted
This Phish , layers, and layers.... Silent in the Morning - YouTube -
By KayC · Posted
Hi @Valfole! nice to meet you and Welcome! I'm very happy you found this Forum and its been as helpful to you as it has been to myself and many others here. Its a great place for open dialogue so please be sure to ask questions, seek answers, and share your feelings. That's how we all grow. Wishing you the best in your relationship❣️ Deep breaths ... one step at a time. -
By ElizabethStar · Posted
I'm out of coffee again. It's Earl Grey for me. Yesterday was my wife's birthday. Her brother and his GF came over to make dinner and see what we've done with our place. We had spent most of the day cleaning our house. I didn't put any effort into my outfit and spent the day in a pair VS/PINK brand 3/4 yoga pants and a hoodie. I had fully expected to be asked to change before her brother came over but when the time came she said I looked fine and I don't need to change. Later on she opened gifts. One of the is a chicken coop. Ever since she found out we can have chickens on our property she's been obsessed with the idea. A wall worthy event. We have a section of brick wall in our living room. There was a free standing fireplace once upon a time so I guess the wall put for fire protection. Anyways the bricks are painted white. One of our friends suggested we write a life event on each brick as the happens. We bought the house, wrote on a brick. Wife got her chicken coop, wrote it on a brick. So last night while I was up on a stool writing that she got her chicken coop she suggests that we paint the bricks different colors. "Ya know, your pride colors". Me: rainbow or pink,blue and white? Her: pink,blue and white. I almost fell off the stool. Later we were all just hanging out, talking, drinking wine and somehow (I think my wife just threw it out there) that I'm (me) the girl in the relationship and she's the boy since she's such a tom-boy and hates dressing up and having to put on face. She does love her baseball caps. I'm just going to, at my own risk, assume she has finally settled with idea that she married a trans-girl. -
By Delcina B · Posted
Welcome Becca! Your story sounds really familiar. I just beginning this exploring me journey after suppressing my feelings for years. So happy your family & the world! Hugs Delcina -
By KayC · Posted
Hi @Shawnster. I know exactly where you are coming from. From the time I came out to my wife as transfeminine (about a year ago) it has been a similar denial and avoidance on her part. Other than that our daily relationship is a good one, but its on her terms for what I am allowed to do (or more what I am not allowed to do .. ). That means the underlying tension always resurfaces at some point and then there is a meltdown on her part. I had asked her before to attend therapy with me but she always told me she did not feel the need (I guess she saw it as "my problem" not hers). But after the last meltdown she finally offered to attend (last week). One session did not solve everything between us but I came out of that with the feeling she had definitely moved in the right direction of "understanding" even if its not quite acceptance yet. Bottom line is, IF your wife loves you (and I have no doubt you love her as you declared), couples therapy (and possible individual therapy for both of you) may be your best chance at both of you being happy ... together. One other thing .. I have not started HRT yet. But (for me) I feel I would need my wife's blessing before I started. (For me again) Starting without her knowing/accepting would be a betrayal of her trust in me. Deep breaths ... one step at a time. -
By Drayse · Posted
Hi @identityfun I'm sure that you will, particularly if you follow the advice some members have already provided.
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