Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Emotional Eating


DeeDee

Recommended Posts

In one way this is one of those things that makes me exactly like all the other women in my family, we all use food as a crutch when we are dealing with emotional issues, a hard day or a horrible, teary or depressed mood often leads to that almost automatic reaching for chocolate, or sweet biscuits(cookies) or stodgy comfort carb filled food like mac 'n' cheese and pizza.

I am trying my best to lose weight, and I know exercise will help the most, even though I mentally struggle to drag myself out the door instead of going back to bed, but having had a really sad morning I had to literally stop myself from buying a chocolate bar when I was picking up something for my sons lunch and mentally tricked myself by buying a chocolate advent calendar that I can't eat yet.

 

Has anyone here ever managed to break that food dependancy pattern?

 

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Break? No. I've been managing it though by finding healthy alternatives and drinking more water. I still have the occasional bad day food binge, but I try and keep the "locusts attacked my kitchen" days to a minimum. Another way I manage it is to not have any (well, much, Susan has a stash) of the foods I KNOW that I'll binge on in the house. Also, for "bags of things" (I'm looking at YOU trail mix), I always take out a serving sized portion then go eat it in the other room. That helps to keep me from just swallowing the whole bag.

 

Hugs!

Link to comment

@Jackie C. Yeah, I know what I should be eating, but soup or a salad just doesn't hit the same emotional sweet spot as a homemade cheeseburger and I get bored of them easily.

I have limited the amount of crisps and sweets I buy in now, and am pretty much forcing my son to eat the fruit and yoghurt he says he likes instead of buying the chocolate, but that impulse to get it at the shop is still there lol.

My one win is that I have managed to pretty much cut bread out of my life as up until a few years ago the food did not exist that I wouldn't consume in a sandwich and even going gluten free just made me more determined to find or make good gf bread.

Trying to find alternatives for those wee snacks and the nightly rummaging around the cupboards is what gets me too. I need a cupboard that smacks my hand when I open it.?‍♀️

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

There are still healthier ways to do that. For example: I made Korean fried chicken last week. I used the air fryer to keep the greasy bits from piling up and a spray to keep everything nice and moist. My friend Ray lives on eggs, salmon and nuts. I can't do that. Just no. I do what I can and exercise though. It seems to be working (keeping in mind that I'm down to 190 pounds from 300).

Cravings need to be at least partially indulged as soon as they arrive. If you put it off, you'll binge harder. You don't generally need a lot though. Just a little bit.

We've got a good GF bakery around the corner and down the block. Necessary because my wife has celiac disease. So yeah, everything I eat is gluten-free.

 

I do soup and sandwiches twice a week for dinner. Tomato basil soup with grilled ham and cheese is awesome. Learning to do it with GF bread was a little challenging, but I got it eventually. I do pretty good GF stuffed French toast on the weekends too when the mood strikes me (if I haven't already eaten all the eggs). I just make sure to limit my carb intake for the rest of the day so I can have a good splurge.

 

That's working for me anyway. If you're craving something, eat it. If you're emotionally eating (which I don't do as much anymore, the exercise and therapy helped with that), recognize that you're doing it and take steps to stop it. Exercise and transitioning so I don't hate myself so much was a winning combination for me. That and wanting to be as fit as some of my friends. The gym is a big motivator. I keep thinking, "OH! I want to look like that!"

 

Hugs!

Link to comment

This topic should come with a warning. I wasn't hungry and was planning not to eat anything more tonight and now I'm craving dipps.

 

To make it worse, I can't even help you. The only thing that works for me is making myself some herbal tea normal tea that I fancy (that's why I have so many different kinds of tea at home), with stevia. It works, except when it doesn't.

Link to comment
5 hours ago, Jackie C. said:

Exercise and transitioning so I don't hate myself so much was a winning combination for me.

:)❤️ Thanks Jackie, I honestly hadn't considered that I am still mistreating the body I don't care about. I need to remind myself that I have to turn these moobs into boobs! ?

I have made some good changes but still need to do more, when I am out and exercising I love it, but it is always hard to get out in the first place.

I found that 1 cup gf flour, 1 cup oat/soya milk and 1 large egg makes a superb thick and creamy pancake batter - my kids love them. Though I should add they also love it when I make them sushi rolls for lunch.

 

Sorry @Gabriel, I am a true omnivore, with the exception of pink fish, mushrooms and liver/offal there is not much I wont eat, and so I just enjoy food in general. It is the quantity and quality that tends to be lacking ;)

 

I like green tea, nettle tea and peppermint tea outside of my normal everyday blends, I have never gotten on well with fruit teas because I want them to taste as sweet as the warm juice I had in my childhood.

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator
1 hour ago, DeeDee said:

I like green tea, nettle tea and peppermint tea outside of my normal everyday blends

 

I've been using peppermint tea to wake up since I ditched the caffeine. Drop in a little honey... lovely.

 

1 hour ago, DeeDee said:

I found that 1 cup gf flour, 1 cup oat/soya milk and 1 large egg makes a superb thick and creamy pancake batter - my kids love them

 

I completely cheat on that. Bisquick has a GF pancake batter mix. I've been using almond milk as a dairy substitute though. I'm a little dairy intolerant and one of my friends is completely lactose intolerant (and sometimes I bake for friends, this Tuesday for example...). Though I originally switched for the extra potassium so I could drop it into a protein shake. It also keeps longer which is nice.

 

1 hour ago, DeeDee said:

:)❤️ Thanks Jackie, I honestly hadn't considered that I am still mistreating the body I don't care about. I need to remind myself that I have to turn these moobs into boobs! ?

 

Learning to like myself prompted a bunch of lifestyle changes. When I finally started to transition, I had gotten to the point where I went to bed each night praying for death. I hadn't moved more than absolutely necessary since High School and ate like a garbage disposal in a McDonalds. It was not pretty.

Once I started transitioning though, I had this picture of the woman I wanted to be in my head and started taking steps to bring her into reality. There was a lot of, "Does Jackie live in a dirty house? No she does NOT!" and "Does Jackie lay around like a slug? Of course she doesn't!" I'm not living my best life yet, but it's certainly better than it was before.

 

Hugs!

Link to comment
10 hours ago, Jackie C. said:

I had this picture of the woman I wanted to be in my head and started taking steps to bring her into reality. There was a lot of, "Does Jackie live in a dirty house? No she does NOT!" and "Does Jackie lay around like a slug? Of course she doesn't!" I'm not living my best life yet, but it's certainly better than it was before.

 

That's uber helpful Jackie. Thank you

Link to comment
10 hours ago, DeeDee said:

I honestly hadn't considered that I am still mistreating the body I don't care about

 

Gee, I hadn't see that either, althoug my pattern is more "starve it / binge eat / starve it again"

Link to comment
14 hours ago, Jackie C. said:

Once I started transitioning though, I had this picture of the woman I wanted to be in my head and started taking steps to bring her into reality. There was a lot of, "Does Jackie live in a dirty house? No she does NOT!" and "Does Jackie lay around like a slug? Of course she doesn't!" I'm not living my best life yet, but it's certainly better than it was before.

This is absolutely the sort of thing I was hoping to hear about. Thank you! :) 

Link to comment

I tend to emotionally eat sometimes if I'm feeling down or really bored Since covid and the staying home thing my weight has gotten out of control.

There are times I feel guilty for getting so heavy that I just think what the heck and eat anyway.

Link to comment
5 hours ago, Teri Anne said:

There are times I feel guilty for getting so heavy that I just think what the heck and eat anyway.

I do this sometimes too and I recognise it as self sabotage, because in my mind I want to be a UK 12-14 which is what I have always seen as healthy weight, not svelt or supermodel thin, but enough to be able to buy in most places. I may not get there with my shoulders but I want to at least try.

When I go through those phases in my head I start calling myself fat and then tell myself that everyone will laugh at the fat (insert insult here) trying to be a woman. One of my sisters would kill to be down to my weight, but she understands the cycle as she has had a lot to deal with too, our other sisters have always been thin and active. 

By sabotaging through food it lets me off the hook and I can go back to not doing anything, but also makes it possible to have moobs which, with a padded bra, allow for a shape I pine to see in the mirror and am loathe to lose,even if they are hairy.

 

That being said, now I am not hiding behind my internal transphobia I want to fix it and silence my inner critic so I have gone back to my couch25k app and restarted it for the 3rd or 4th time in the last two years and have refused to buy in crisps and chocolate and started drinking at least a pint of water each day.

Link to comment

I wish all the luck in getting to your goal weight.

When I first started dressing I was on the slim side and never thought I looked passable because I had no boobs or curves.

That was almost as bad as being fat really.

At least now I can pass easier to some degree but still its not a female body if that makes sense.

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   5 Members, 0 Anonymous, 149 Guests (See full list)

    • Carolyn Marie
    • Ivy
    • Abigail Genevieve
    • SamC
    • KathyLauren
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.6k
    • Total Posts
      767.9k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,014
    • Most Online
      8,356

    Quillian
    Newest Member
    Quillian
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. l.demiurge
      l.demiurge
  • Posts

    • Ashley0616
      Nothing wrong with that. I'm glad that you found what makes you happy! Just curious what does your wife think? If it's too personal I understand.
    • Ashley0616
    • Ashley0616
      – According to a recent survey, the most popular name for a dog is Max. Other popular names include Molly, Sam, Zach, and Maggie.
    • Ashley0616
    • Ashley0616
      Either new environment/ not potty trained
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Bob was on his way home from the dojo and he "just happened" to driver by her place. It was 10:30.  Her light was still on.  He knew exactly where she was sitting.  He saw her in his mind.   A fierce wave of desire that took his breath away suddenly showed up. All he had to do was stop, get out of the car, walk to the door and knock.  She would answer, glad to see him.  She would know why he was there and what he wanted. She would invite him in, maybe get him something to drink, disappear for a moment and return in "something more comfortable."  She would lead him back. Oh, joy.   And never, ever speak to him again afterwards.  Or she would not let him in but be angry about it.  In no way, emotionally, physically, mentally or spiritually, was she ready for this, and he knew it, if he was honest with himself, and she knew he knew it.  She would look upon it as another assault and their relationship would be irretrievably broken.  He would have to leave town. It would devastate her. It would devastate him.    He fought himself.  He was frozen to his seat as his reason and his body fought. He was twenty four years old, a full-blooded male with normal desires; he had just worked out and he was ready.  All he had to do now was open the car door. No one would know. He held his hands, one in the other, to keep one from moving, against his reason and will, to open that door.  He did not want to be a slave of his desires.   He looked across the street.  Mrs. McCarthy, sister of his landlord, was peeking though her window.  She knew his car.  Everyone in town would know by noon the next day if he got out of the car.  Taylor did not need that, either, and she would know, if he came to the door now, what a selfish thing it would be: in his own eyes, in the eyes of Taylor, in the eyes of the town, and worst of all, in the eyes of God.   He sat there a moment longer.  He was, as he reflected, entering into her sufferings in a small way that she would be made whole, healthy and happy: what he wanted more than anything.  But this hurt.  Why had all this come on her?  He asked God again, but there was only silence. He drove home in that silence. He chided himself for even going on her street and for driving on it other nights.  He would stop that, he told himself.   ------------------------------------------   The next morning Taylor went out to her car to go to work.  Mrs. McCarthy met her before she got to it. "I thought you were going to get lucky last night, dearie," she said. Taylor was puzzled. "Why, what do you mean?" "That young fellow - you know, Bob - he's been driving around here, going up and down the street some nights, not stopping.  Well, last night he parked and sat in his car for a while.   I think he was staring at your window.  I think he was trying to get up the courage to knock on the door. I was rooting for him.   But then he drove away.  Faint heart never won fair lady, as they say. What a shame. You two are a lovely couple.  Well, have a good day!" "Thank you, Mrs. McCarthy."  Taylor knew Bob extremely well and knew what had been going through his mind.  She was more than grateful he had not gotten out of the car. Better for him, better for her, better for everybody.  Surgery "down there" sooner than later.  This was driving the poor boy crazy. It was driving her crazy, too.  But she had a lot to work through. Surgery "up here" she said, pointing to her head.  She woke up her therapist on the way to work.  They were still talking when she pulled into her designated parking spot.  That was a perk that had happened yesterday.  She took a deep breath and headed into work. It would be another wild day.
    • Ashley0616
      bittersweet: especially : pleasure accompanied by suffering or regret
    • Abigail Genevieve
      I'm thinking about some interactions yesterday I did, while presenting as male but acting as female, that were far better than I did when I was presenting as male and acting as male.  #girlunderhood. I do a crappy job at acting as male and I am giving it up.  I am not talking about feminine gestures or presentation but just relating as a woman.  People don't realize I am doing it but it is a whole lot easier to do.   You don't just put on a dress and BOOM you are a girl.  You are a girl and you put on a dress.  Or not. Whether I am in jeans or a skirt (I wish, wife would have lots to say) I am a girl.  I don't need $250 in makeup and heels and hose and all that.  I don't need surgery. Honey, I have arrived.  Now I have to work out how that best works in my life, causing the minimal damage and creating the maximum good, but I have more working room.   Oh, and I am still pissed off at everyone and everything. #Contradictory.
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      @Willow it is certainly possible that my husband planned it. Placing me in the path of an opportunity....he certainly does things like that. GF has done some work for the company as an outside consultant, so I'm sure the company owner knows what potential resources are around.    It could also have just happened randomly. He has taken me to work with him before, just because he likes to have me around. I remember one time that I fell asleep with my head in his lap, and he held a meeting with his subordinates without waking me and making me move.  The company culture is family oriented and relaxed.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      The photo is great.  Software is phenomenal but it also is sort of a promise of things to come. Years ago this sort of thing took a photographer and Photoshop and all sorts of things and you would say, "I can look like THIS??"   Me, I am a duck.  That's from my driver's license.  Just kidding.
    • MaeBe
      I lucked into that picture. I took like 10 before that, which appropriately make me look like a donkey. ;)   Thank you so much for the compliment!
    • Mmindy
      You're welcome Sally,   Hugs,   Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
    • Mmindy
      This is a great analogy. The statement is true as it relates to the tree. The analogy fits because we as a LGBTQIA community are stronger when we stand together. It also work here on Transgender Pulse Forums. The support I feel from so many others has made me comfortable with my stance, because I'm in a beautiful forest of friends. So when I'm out alone and confronted. I can respond and act like the single tree in the field, surviving whatever comes my way. My roots reach back and communicate with others like me.    Standing Strong,   Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
    • Ashley0616
    • Ashley0616
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...