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What do you do with your sober life?


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Going out and drinking had been an important part of my life until I recently learned that almost no one likes me that way. I've decided to put off drinking again, because it's spurred fights between me and my girlfriend and one of my other friends. I'm really considering just cutting it out altogether. It does preoccupy my mind a lot, though. I don't really consider myself a heavy drinker, but I learned from a pretty bad alcoholic 😅 I'm not terribly worried about it, just waiting for the cravings to fade again. What do you guys do with your sober lives? Like I said, going out and drinking used to be the main thing I looked forward to, so now I'm kind of at a loss.

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I have no problems finding things to do when this isolation thing is not around.  I don't have to be where alcohol is served to have fun with people.  I have time for hobbies that require my clear thinking and steadiness, especially around machinery or electronics that could harm me if I was not steady with my hands or body.  If I am not holding a beer can, I get better results from my camera for a good shot.  I can concentrate on learning to sing and make better progress.  I have better taste in clothing.  I can live my life as I need to without fear it will hurt my internal organs.  Those are a few things I do without alcohol, but there are more too, but I can come back for those.

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I remember feeling that way.  It seemed everything I did involved drinking in some way.  I remember thinking "what do people do to socialize without it"?


That was 15 years ago...now, alcohol never crosses my mind.  I found that there was a world without booze, and it was actually much bigger.  I stopped drinking and immediately realized how boring bars are.  It takes time, but if you keep a sense of purpose about you, one day you realize that you used to go drinking a lot.  It might leave you at a loss for a while, but it might also leave you more capable with more choices in the long run.  It sure did for me.  There's a whole list of worries, trouble, fights, sickness, and other baggage that accompanies drinking that is no longer part of my world at all...and I'm so glad.


I found a physical hobby really helpful since I was pretty restless at first.  Bicycling?  Kung Fu?  Dancing?  Whatever grabs you.  Just know it may take a little while, but your perspective can really change.

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That's actually really helpful. I was thinking about boxing or learning taekwando or something. And you can socialize without drinking? Lol all jokes aside, it's time I grew up and did something else with my life. 😅

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  • Forum Moderator

I felt much the same way as i faced leaving my best friend....alcohol.  What could i do in the evenings?  How could i sleep?  Or worse yet could i even get past the craving?  Oddly over time that craving grows and becomes a physical sickness.  It did for me.  

Today i've found get joy in getting to know others who are facing the same issue.  I'm enjoying the work on the farm as never before.  Maybe i don't get as much done as an older person but with a clear head it is so much more beautiful.  I once had to drink to celebrate, socialize, express myself, or "experience" sadness.  Today i feel life and live each precious day.





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Ah the memories ... What now ?


I was forced to stop drinking or die, so my journey is a little different than yours.

Part of my recovery was about reconnecting with what I enjoyed before the alcohol took over.

I still remember going to a party early on and listening to the same story over an over again throughout the night and it got more embellished and divorced from the reality and thinking was I like that ?


Still I took up cycling again, tried tennis, basketball, cricket, caving, hiking, etc.  It was more about finding out what I liked now. We all change and I was no different.

One thing that occupied a lot of my time was I applied and went to University (i think in the US its called College, but at a University !!)


The odd thing is, nobody I drank and partied with has ever talked to me or gotten in touch. Strange friends. Did I try you ask, well yes but they were never home always out partying somewhere. Life goes on.


So I have new friends, still doing different things as I haven't really found that one thing to do. Maybe I never will, maybe I'll just spend my life doing different stuff and having fun.

Not drinking gives you lots of time to enjoy things in life, I wish you best for search.





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  • 2 weeks later...

I usually watch TV series on Netflix and internet...

There is curfew in Turkey, breaking up the street to a fine of around $ 500 :)
I don't really prefer to go out: P

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  • 10 months later...

As I used to binge drink and suddenly there is no need to do that.  So getting back into my crafts and 3d printing working with leather and enjoying a more creative occupation instead of sitting in a bar and drinking and thinking about the things I could be doing.  These days I'm actually trying to do it.  Must admit though its a steep learning curve as I have decades of bad habits to fight against.  I no longer have the need but it does raise its tempting little head with a come hither wink.  Its no longer as strong a temptation as it was.  I tend to think its a little like muscle memory and smoking.  You may have stopped but you just want something in your hand 

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