Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Hi, looking to reconnect and hungry for info on being fluid.


tomi

Recommended Posts

my name is Tomi, M/F I had been on hrt for about a year in 2012, came down with multiple myeloma, life being a lot shorter when your older, decided to pick up my self and start again. restarted hrt in Aug. '20 with physician who seems knowledgeable enough.  not looking to to go all the way (though wish I could-I know, I know) settling for the best of both lives.   HRT (at the correct peaceful level), cosmetics and generally anything to be able to cope in such a state of life. I come to see all the tried and true "real experienced" info and this seems like a warm and wonderful place to find it. So a sincere Hello to all those who are here!

Link to comment
  • Admin

Welcome to Transgender Pulse, Tomi.  I'm so glad you're doing better after that bout with cancer, and it seems like things are going well for you.  We're glad you're here and hope that we can assist with anything you need, in terms of both advice, experience or just friendship.  I hope to "see" you around the forums.

 

HUGS

 

Carolyn Marie

Link to comment

Hi Tomi, it's nice to meet you and welcome to the forums. I wholeheartedly agree, this is a warm and wonderful place full of many lovely people with diverse experiences and perspectives. I feel very at home here since I joined right around Thanksgiving. I'm happy to hear that you're in a better place especially after your battle with cancer, and it's wonderful you have a doctor who's supportive of your goals with HRT. I'm looking forward to getting to know you.

 

Love,

~Audrey.

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator
3 hours ago, tomi said:

life being a lot shorter when your older, decided to pick up my self and start again. restarted hrt in Aug. '20

Hi Tomi, Welcome to our humble forum. The “life is short” idiom is the reason I moved forward with my transition too. I was 56 and realized if I was ever going to do it...now is the time. I think it’s never too late to try to better yourself. You seem to know exactly what you want. Thanks for sharing some of your story with us. I look forward to reading more as you feel the need.

 

Warmest Regards,

Susan R?

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Hello Tomi and welcome.  I'm glad to read you're doing better and have picked up on life.  Please join in!!

 

Jani 

Link to comment

I'm feeling warm all over already, thanks so much for the greetings! I look up to anyone who have transitioned! what a feat!
I have been in remission, my type of cancer doesn't go away,only maintained. I feel actually better being on HRT, physically and emotionally. a particular nasty problem disappeared and it has given me that better hope, lifted spirits and that new outlook that says "I have better things to do with my life" and that feeling increases as I continue with HRT. but yes, I do watch carefully my disease.

I am not out to anyone and my latest fear is having my other Dr's know that I'm on HRT. I work for the same health system and I just denied I was on estrogen the other day as it came up on their computer system as I saw a new Dr regarding reducing my prednisone that I've been on for years. I know it's wrong and realize it's going to come out sooner or later. Even though due to HIPPA laws, such info must remain confidential, we all know (especially in a small city) that talk seeps out and  soon people will start to talk ?  I want it this way because I am not planning on transition, just to be fluid, to give myself some peace and a new outlook on life. If I am ever questioned about it, I made a commitment to say YES, I am on estrogen and finasteride if it comes up. I guess that will be my 1t and possibly only stop I will take in "coming-out" just to my physicians

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator
1 hour ago, tomi said:

I just denied I was on estrogen the other day as it came up on their computer system as I saw a new Dr regarding reducing my prednisone that I've been on for years.

Your health is more important than keeping this secret from those in charge of your prescriptions and medical care. I think most medical professionals will not condemn you for this revelation. That being said, I am not in your shoes and don’t know anything about your specific work environment. But if there’s some worry about your job and transitioning, I would talk to someone in HR about your rights in the workplace. I would hope there wouldn’t be any blowback if you talked to your doctor and told them all the medications you’re on and came clean. I realize how difficult this  is but who knows...they might even surprise you!

 

Susan R?

Link to comment

Welcome aboard Tomi.

Congrat's on your decision and your journey . Very proud of you for being a Cancer Survivor.  

Be Safe, BE Proud and KICK ASS

Link to comment

Hi Tomi! nice to meet you and Welcome!

On 1/19/2021 at 3:10 AM, tomi said:

I am not out to anyone

Me either.  Only to my wife and its a bit of a struggle for her.  I am also not able to start HRT yet so all of these obstacles add additional anxieties that go beyond the gender dysphoria.  Gender therapy has been extremely helpful for me to deal with these complexities.

 

I understand it complex and you also have to balance your other health concerns, but I do detect though that being able to accept and live as close as possible to your True self is what really makes you happy.  So I hope you can find the path that fits best to your situation ... and realize its not set in stone.  You are in the drivers seat❣️

 

Deep breaths ... one step at a time

Link to comment

Hi @tomiand welcome!! Idk how I missed this post until now, but I am glad you're here and I hope you feel at home. Thanks for sharing your story with us. ❤️

Link to comment

Hi Tomi

I'm in the VA Health Care system, and for three months, I've been in MtF transition. The VA is seriously committed to helping people like me, with HRT, a Gender Therapist, an online Trans group, and other occasional needs. I really appreciate it all; however, 

they "chart" everything into my medical file, which is available to every medical professional in the VA across the country and I suppose in military hospitals world-wide.

 

Without the VA, I couldn't afford it, sooo,

"Screw it," I said. I just stopped worrying about it. They're supposed to maintain confidentiality, but if they don't, t'hell with it. I don't know these people, they're not my judge or family members, and, it's none of their business anyway, unless they're treating me. You are violating no policy with HRT [if your employer has such a policy, it's not legal -- see recent discussion under "Thank you, Joe], but they would be in violation of HIPAA. I figured they've got a lot more to loose. 

 

Let me add my welcome

~~Big hug, from Lee~~

 

Link to comment
3 hours ago, Lee H said:

Without the VA, I couldn't afford it

Same.     
My experience with them has been good so far.    I’m out anyway.  

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   4 Members, 0 Anonymous, 97 Guests (See full list)

    • Abigail Genevieve
    • violet r
    • MaybeRob
    • Lenneth
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.7k
    • Total Posts
      768.3k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,023
    • Most Online
      8,356

    Delaney
    Newest Member
    Delaney
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Dillon
      Dillon
    2. Kaylee888
      Kaylee888
    3. lily100
      lily100
      (39 years old)
    4. Luce
      Luce
      (44 years old)
    5. Luke.S
      Luke.S
  • Posts

    • violet r
      This is a question I ask myself all the time. When I'm out I hope that I can some what pass
    • violet r
      I use my  chosen name online and when ever I can. I play some online game and only go by that name. That is how everyone there know me. Yes it does feel great to be called the name you prefer. 
    • Breezy Victor
      I was ten years old when my mom walked in on me frolicking around my room dressed up in her bra, panties, and some pantyhose. I had been doing this in the privacy of my bedroom for a little while now so I had my own little stash box I kept full of different panties, bras, etc ... of hers. My mom's underwear was so easy for me to come by and she was a very attractive woman, classy, elegant. Well when she walked in on me, she looked at me with disgust and said to me... "If I wanted to run around like mommy's little girl instead of mommy's little boy, then she was going to treat me like mommy's little girl."  She left my bedroom after telling me NOT to change or get dressed or anything and returned with a few of her work skirts and blouses and such. She made me model off her outfits for her and I have to admit ... I LOVED EVERY SECOND OF IT. I felt so sexy, and feminine. And she knew I loved it.  She told me we can do this every weekend if I'd like. It would be OUR little secret. 
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      The usual social ways, of course.  Taking care of my partners and stepkids, being involved in my community.  That makes me feel good about my role.   As for physical validation and gender... probably the most euphoric experience is sex.  I grew up with my mother telling me that my flat and boyish body was strange, that my intersex anatomy was shameful, that no man would want me. So experiencing what I was told I could never have is physical proof that I'm actually worth something.  
    • KathyLauren
      <Moderator hat on>  I think that, at this point we need to get the thread back onto the topic, which is the judge's ruling on the ballot proposition.  If there is more to be said on the general principles of gendered spaces etc., please discuss them, carefully and respectfully, in separate threads. <Moderator hat off>
    • Abigail Genevieve
      People who have no understanding of transgender conditions should not be making policy for people dealing with it. Since it is such a small percentage of the population, and each individual is unique, and their circumstances are also unique, each situation needs to be worked with individually to see that the best possible solution is implemented for those involved. 
    • Abigail Genevieve
      No.  You are getting stuck on one statement and pulling it out of context.   Trans kids have rights, but so do non-trans kids.  That conflict is best worked out in the individual situation. 
    • MaeBe
      I get the concept, I believe. You're trying to state that trans kids need to or should be excluded from binary gender spaces and that you acknowledge that answers to accommodate those kids may not be found through policy. I disagree with the capability of "penetration" as being the operative delimiter in the statement, however. I contest this statement is poorly chosen at best and smacks of prejudice at worst. That it perpetuates certain stereotypes, whether that was the intent or not.   Frankly, all kids should have the right to privacy in locker rooms, regardless of gender, sexuality, or anatomy. They should also have access to exercise and activities that other kids do and allow them to socialize in those activities. The more kids are othered, extracted, or barred from the typical school day the more isolated and stigmatized they become. That's not healthy for anyone, the excluded for obvious reasons and the included for others--namely they get to be the "haves" and all that entails.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Context.  Read the context.  Good grief.
    • MaeBe
      Please don't expect people to read manifold pages of fiction to understand a post.   There was a pointed statement made, and I responded to it. The statement used the term penetration, not "dissimilar anatomy causing social discomfiture", or some other reason. It was extended as a "rule" across very different social situations as well, locker and girl's bedrooms. How that term is used in most situations is to infer sexual contact, so most readers would read that and think the statement is that we "need to keep trans girl's penises out of cis girls", which reads very closely to the idea that trans people are often portrayed as sexual predators.   I understand we can't always get all of our thoughts onto the page, but this doesn't read like an under-cooked idea or a lingual short cut.
    • Ashley0616
      I shopped online in the beginning of transition. I had great success with SHEIN and Torrid!
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Have you read the rest of what I wrote?   Please read between the lines of what I said about high school.  Go over and read my Taylor story.  Put two and two together.   That is all I will say about that.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      "I feel like I lost my husband," Lois told the therapist,"I want the man I married." Dr. Smith looked at Odie, sitting there in his men's clothing, looking awkward and embarrassed. "You have him.  This is just a part of him you did not know about. Or did not face." She turned to Odie,"Did you tear my wedding dress on our wedding night?" He admitted it.  She had a whole catalog of did-you and how-could you.  Dr. Smith encouraged her to let it all out. Thirty years of marriage.  Strange makeup in the bathroom.  The kids finding women's laundry in the laundry room. There was reconciliation. "What do we do now?" Dr. Smith said they had to work that out.  Odie began wearing women's clothing when not at work.  They visited a cross-dressers' social club but it did not appeal to them.  The bed was off limits to cross dressing.  She had limits and he could respect her limits.  Visits to relatives would be with him in men's clothing.    "You have nail polish residue," a co-worker pointed out.  Sure enough, the bottom of his left pinky nail was bright pink  His boss asked him to go home and fix it.  He did.   People were talking, he was sure, because he doubted he was anywhere as thorough as he wanted to be.  It was like something in him wanted to tell everyone what he was doing, and he was sloppy.   His boss dropped off some needed paperwork on a Saturday unexpectedly and found Odie dressed in a house dress and wig.  "What?" the boss said, shook his head, and left.  None of his business.   "People are talking," Lois said. "They are asking about this," she pointed to his denim skirt. "This seems to go past or deeper than cross dressing."   "Yes.  I guess we need some counseling."  And they went.
    • April Marie
      You look wonderful!!! A rose among the roses.
    • Ashley0616
      Mine would be SHEIN as much as I have bought from them lol.
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...