Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Hi, looking to reconnect and hungry for info on being fluid.


tomi

Recommended Posts

my name is Tomi, M/F I had been on hrt for about a year in 2012, came down with multiple myeloma, life being a lot shorter when your older, decided to pick up my self and start again. restarted hrt in Aug. '20 with physician who seems knowledgeable enough.  not looking to to go all the way (though wish I could-I know, I know) settling for the best of both lives.   HRT (at the correct peaceful level), cosmetics and generally anything to be able to cope in such a state of life. I come to see all the tried and true "real experienced" info and this seems like a warm and wonderful place to find it. So a sincere Hello to all those who are here!

Link to post
  • Admin
Carolyn Marie

Welcome to Transgender Pulse, Tomi.  I'm so glad you're doing better after that bout with cancer, and it seems like things are going well for you.  We're glad you're here and hope that we can assist with anything you need, in terms of both advice, experience or just friendship.  I hope to "see" you around the forums.

 

HUGS

 

Carolyn Marie

Link to post

Hi Tomi, it's nice to meet you and welcome to the forums. I wholeheartedly agree, this is a warm and wonderful place full of many lovely people with diverse experiences and perspectives. I feel very at home here since I joined right around Thanksgiving. I'm happy to hear that you're in a better place especially after your battle with cancer, and it's wonderful you have a doctor who's supportive of your goals with HRT. I'm looking forward to getting to know you.

 

Love,

~Audrey.

Link to post
  • Forum Moderator
3 hours ago, tomi said:

life being a lot shorter when your older, decided to pick up my self and start again. restarted hrt in Aug. '20

Hi Tomi, Welcome to our humble forum. The “life is short” idiom is the reason I moved forward with my transition too. I was 56 and realized if I was ever going to do it...now is the time. I think it’s never too late to try to better yourself. You seem to know exactly what you want. Thanks for sharing some of your story with us. I look forward to reading more as you feel the need.

 

Warmest Regards,

Susan R🌷

Link to post
  • Forum Moderator

Hello Tomi and welcome.  I'm glad to read you're doing better and have picked up on life.  Please join in!!

 

Jani 

Link to post

I'm feeling warm all over already, thanks so much for the greetings! I look up to anyone who have transitioned! what a feat!
I have been in remission, my type of cancer doesn't go away,only maintained. I feel actually better being on HRT, physically and emotionally. a particular nasty problem disappeared and it has given me that better hope, lifted spirits and that new outlook that says "I have better things to do with my life" and that feeling increases as I continue with HRT. but yes, I do watch carefully my disease.

I am not out to anyone and my latest fear is having my other Dr's know that I'm on HRT. I work for the same health system and I just denied I was on estrogen the other day as it came up on their computer system as I saw a new Dr regarding reducing my prednisone that I've been on for years. I know it's wrong and realize it's going to come out sooner or later. Even though due to HIPPA laws, such info must remain confidential, we all know (especially in a small city) that talk seeps out and  soon people will start to talk 🤫  I want it this way because I am not planning on transition, just to be fluid, to give myself some peace and a new outlook on life. If I am ever questioned about it, I made a commitment to say YES, I am on estrogen and finasteride if it comes up. I guess that will be my 1t and possibly only stop I will take in "coming-out" just to my physicians

Link to post
  • Forum Moderator
1 hour ago, tomi said:

I just denied I was on estrogen the other day as it came up on their computer system as I saw a new Dr regarding reducing my prednisone that I've been on for years.

Your health is more important than keeping this secret from those in charge of your prescriptions and medical care. I think most medical professionals will not condemn you for this revelation. That being said, I am not in your shoes and don’t know anything about your specific work environment. But if there’s some worry about your job and transitioning, I would talk to someone in HR about your rights in the workplace. I would hope there wouldn’t be any blowback if you talked to your doctor and told them all the medications you’re on and came clean. I realize how difficult this  is but who knows...they might even surprise you!

 

Susan R🌷

Link to post

Welcome aboard Tomi.

Congrat's on your decision and your journey . Very proud of you for being a Cancer Survivor.  

Be Safe, BE Proud and KICK ASS

Link to post
Chloe Cozee

Hi Tomi,

 

It's nice to meet you. I am also a cancer survivor. Be strong and be your best girl!

 

Hugs,

Chloe

Link to post

Hi Tomi! nice to meet you and Welcome!

On 1/19/2021 at 3:10 AM, tomi said:

I am not out to anyone

Me either.  Only to my wife and its a bit of a struggle for her.  I am also not able to start HRT yet so all of these obstacles add additional anxieties that go beyond the gender dysphoria.  Gender therapy has been extremely helpful for me to deal with these complexities.

 

I understand it complex and you also have to balance your other health concerns, but I do detect though that being able to accept and live as close as possible to your True self is what really makes you happy.  So I hope you can find the path that fits best to your situation ... and realize its not set in stone.  You are in the drivers seat❣️

 

Deep breaths ... one step at a time

Link to post
Vanessa Michelle

Hi @tomiand welcome!! Idk how I missed this post until now, but I am glad you're here and I hope you feel at home. Thanks for sharing your story with us. ❤️

Link to post

Hi Tomi

I'm in the VA Health Care system, and for three months, I've been in MtF transition. The VA is seriously committed to helping people like me, with HRT, a Gender Therapist, an online Trans group, and other occasional needs. I really appreciate it all; however, 

they "chart" everything into my medical file, which is available to every medical professional in the VA across the country and I suppose in military hospitals world-wide.

 

Without the VA, I couldn't afford it, sooo,

"Screw it," I said. I just stopped worrying about it. They're supposed to maintain confidentiality, but if they don't, t'hell with it. I don't know these people, they're not my judge or family members, and, it's none of their business anyway, unless they're treating me. You are violating no policy with HRT [if your employer has such a policy, it's not legal -- see recent discussion under "Thank you, Joe], but they would be in violation of HIPAA. I figured they've got a lot more to loose. 

 

Let me add my welcome

~~Big hug, from Lee~~

 

Link to post
3 hours ago, Lee H said:

Without the VA, I couldn't afford it

Same.     
My experience with them has been good so far.    I’m out anyway.  

Link to post

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   5 Members, 0 Anonymous, 29 Guests (See full list)

    • Confused1
    • Jandi
    • Jamie68
    • Emily michelle
    • Carolyn Marie
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

  • Topics With Zero Replies

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      73,371
    • Total Posts
      675,753
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      8,169
    • Most Online
      8,356

    Valfole
    Newest Member
    Valfole
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Alex123
      Alex123
      (16 years old)
  • Posts

    • Confused1
      I agree with Carolyn. If you haven't seen a gender therapist, you would benefit from talking with one. I will PM you.   Hugs, Mike
    • Jamie68
      Back in the mid 80s I had a Suzuki 450 2 cyl. I loved it. It had 5 gears and got 75 mpg. Had to sell it when I moved back to Illinois from Tacoma. 
    • Carolyn Marie
      Shawnster, I totally understand how you feel.  There is no easy answer.  The harder answer is that neither you nor she asked for this, it is just who you are, and no amount of pretending otherwise will change that.  She may, like many of our spouses, come to accept it over time, and perhaps even embrace it once she sees how happy you are.  But then again, she may not, and that is just the reality.   Do you have a therapist, a G.T?  If not, I strongly urge you to find one, both to help you deal with the guilt, and also to help prepare you for all the changes to come in your life.  It helped me a great deal.  Good luck!   HUGS   Carolyn Marie
    • Confused1
      Congratulations Myles. So glad you found support from your family!   Hugs, Mike
    • Shawnster
      guilt.... what a topic.... I feel a combination of guilt and shame. my wife is my world to me... but she is denying the fact that i want to feminize. She expects me to be the "Alpha male" the manly man I have always pretended to be.... she treats the issue by ignoring it. To the point I haven't even told her I'm going on HRT.... I feel guilty for not telling her... but i don't want to upset her anymore at this stage? I want to be open and honest... but everytime I start, she throws up a wall!?!?!?! I feel my only option is to start the hormones, and see how i feel.... I wish she would walk with me on my journey,but she's in denial... I can't help but feel the shame and guilt of disappointment and deception.... but I truely long to feel softer, more emotional, but the guilt is eating me alive!!! What's a wannabe girl supposed to do?!?!?  Any and all input is welcome!!!  Thanks, Luv Shawn
    • SheenaT
    • Myles97
      @AgnesBardsiethank you!!! I’m trying to breathe and enjoy the moment without worrying about anything that is ahead! 
    • KymmieL
      Nope, I figure their loss. I have contacted the District manager for the stores in Spokane. He said he might just have a place for me. He is going to talk to that stores manager on Monday.   My first bike was an 2007 Harley Sportster 1200L. That was the one I got into my accident with. Broke 4 ribs and damaged my spleen. Wound up trading that on an 08 Fatboy. then in 2015 I traded up again to my Street Glide. I think the only time I didn't ride a Harley was when I went through the safety course. Everything else has been Harley. Not counting my 84 Honda ATC 200x three wheeler. now that was a blast.     Got Ma'amed today. it was great.   Kymmie  
    • Kasumi63
      Hi, Tracy! I like your poem, and thanks for joining in the fun! You got the idea of having some aspect of nature in there, but you have even more syllables left. Your lines have 4-3-3 syllables instead of 5-7-5.    I usually try to think of a specific moment in time and then try to recreate the scene, with a little twist in the final line. Relating one’s feelings to nature is part of it.    For your poem, I’m imagining (maybe incorrectly, so sorry if I’m wrong) you going on a walk in the woods, maybe dressed for the first time (or not).   Stern oaks on both sides A winding path through the woods In my flower dress   Not so good, but that’s my attempt. Sorry I couldn’t do better.    Haiku is so much fun but takes a bit of patience in arranging the syllables. But if you have a clear image in your mind, it really helps a lot.   I hope some other folks will join in. Haiku is so fun!!
    • AgnesBardsie
      They should put this in the dictionary under the definition of courage!    After you breathe remember to smile!
    • Shay
      Joy comes from some unexpected places.
    • Shay
      You would be amazed - just how many in your own community who would.... sadly .... I am so glad you are not one of them.
    • Jackie C.
      I'm confused. Who has that kind of time for unkind thoughts?   Hugs!
    • Shay
    • Shay
      Some day I'd love to have this song be about me........ (although my eyes are hazel)..............    
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...