what to look for

[okubosakura]

I found a revised transgender therapist list in psychologytoday.com and its one page list that accepts Meridian ins. Since I am MtF should I pick a man therapist or a woman therapist? What kind of therapy works best for me? What kinds of questions to ask to a therapist? How do I know that is the therapist is right for me? What kinds of questions the therapist would ask me and what is the best answer to respond?

 

[Jackie C.]

Let's see...

 

Whatever you're comfortable with. My therapist is female. I'm more comfortable with female doctors. If you're more comfortable with male doctors, then choose a man.

 

That will be between you and your therapist. They have preferences and a big-ole' toolbox they can use to help you with your issues.

 

Usually the therapist is asking the questions, but I'd be up-front about saying who you are and why you're interested in seeing them. The only important one is, "Can you help me?"

 

That's a fair question. Unfortunately, therapists are people too. You have to feel each other out. If you're comfortable and you feel like you're making progress, that therapist is a good one for you. If you're constantly butting heads and you feel like you're dead in the water, try a new therapist.

 

What questions the therapist will ask is highly variable, but they'll ask about whatever brought you in to see them. It's not like they're working from a script. The best answers are the ones that are the truth. Talk openly and honestly. Just answer their questions as best you can.

 

One you might get is, "When did you start to think you might be trans?" Answer openly and honestly. I talked about when I was three-ish and I'd turn my underwear around to pretend I was a girl. Your answer will probably be different (or not, I have no idea what you were up to when you were three). Just answer the best you can and let the therapist guide the conversation.

 

Relax. Breathe. Be yourself. Honestly, it'll be fine.

 

Hugs!

[VickySGV]

It does not matter what the therapist's gender is as long as you feel you can trust them and connect with them.  I have a good friend who is a Transitioned Trans man who does a wonderful job with all genders of his clients.  Choose one on your list and call the person and see if you connect with the person. If you do not feel comfortable or they do not feel comfortable with you as a client.

 

You will have to decide what type of therapy works best for you.  There is no one else who can make the call on that, what worked for me, which was addiction counseling since I tackled addiction problems to get a handle on the gender, but really both depended on each other in the beginning.  Your therapist will advise you on what they think is a good course for you to follow.  What worked for me may have no bearing on your life, and you may have issues going in that I did not.

 

The first questions to ask the Therapist is going to be their name, and be sure they are licensed.  Next would be their experience counseling people with gender issues.  Ask if they are affiliated with a particular religion, and if they are it may not be the best idea. Asking which sports they prefer is probably not helpful. 

 

As far as your response to any therapist, it should be the TRUTH and you need to be HONEST with them, it is your life that is in the balance here.  If you have specific psychiatric diagnoses already it will not automatically disqualify from other treatments or possible progress but it will help your therapist evaluate your honesty and ability to understand the benefits and risks of Transitioning to ANY degree.  Therapists are trained to be sure you are not lying to them and catch on pretty quick.  Simply tell them the truth about your life, there are no formula answers or even "best answers" that are not part of your life.  I do know of cases where the patients have lied themselves into HRT and even surgery and while the major person that was hurt was themselves, they badly hurt the chances for other Trans people in need.