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D-Day? T(rans)-Day?


Drayse

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Today is the day! HR will be there and we'll be having multiple small meetings with the staff where I will reintroduce myself as Drayse to my coworkers. I've got my crumpled up speech in my hot, sweaty hand. By the time I'm done my shift I'll be out to the majority of my coworkers.

 

Also, the HR rep has told me that my work documentation will reflect my desired name change, but not gender. The gender change will come once I've made the official change to my birth certificate.

 

I'm both nervous and excited. Dreading it and desiring it. Wish me courage!

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  • Forum Moderator

Congratulations, and good luck!  Coming out is a big step, perhaps the biggest.  I hope your co-workers are all supportive.

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  • Forum Moderator

@Drayse congrats I am so proud of you and I absolutely love your new name - it has such a beautiful sound for a beautiful girl. 

Super Hugs.

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12 hours ago, Drayse said:

Today is the day! HR will be there and we'll be having multiple small meetings with the staff where I will reintroduce myself as Drayse to my coworkers. I've got my crumpled up speech in my hot, sweaty hand. By the time I'm done my shift I'll be out to the majority of my coworkers.

 

Also, the HR rep has told me that my work documentation will reflect my desired name change, but not gender. The gender change will come once I've made the official change to my birth certificate.

 

I'm both nervous and excited. Dreading it and desiring it. Wish me courage!

Wish you the best! ?

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Thanks all of you for all the encouraging words. I wanted to update everybody sooner, but I had left my phone at home. Honestly, when does that ever happen? Sure, leave your lunch. Leave the office keys. But never, ever your phone!

 

Everything seemed to go well. Everybody seemed supportive and a lot of people, particularly the women on staff, mentioned how proud they were of me and how happy I have seemed lately. I'm still trying to absorb it all.

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Congrats Drayse! That's a huge step. I'm so glad it went well.

I'm sure it is a huge weight off your shoulders. It would be for me if I find the courage to come out at work!

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10 hours ago, Drayse said:

Everything seemed to go well. Everybody seemed supportive and a lot of people, particularly the women on staff, mentioned how proud they were of me and how happy I have seemed lately. I'm still trying to absorb it all.

Congratulations Drayse. Glad it went so well for you. Like Gabriel said, it is a huge weight off your shoulders. It takes a while to get used to using a new name. Have you tried signing it yet? I noticed women seem more accepting, get excited and squee about things like this.

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Ohhhhh! I'm so proud of you and congratulations!  I have a question, pronouncing your name does the "se" at the end sound like "S" "See" or "Z". 

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Thanks again everyone. To address some specific questions:

4 hours ago, ElizabethStar said:

Have you tried signing it yet?

I'm assuming you mean signing my signature. If so, not officially but I have been practicing my signature a lot. ?

 

If you meant ASL, no I haven't. That's an interesting idea however.

3 hours ago, Bri2020 said:

I have a question, pronouncing your name does the "se" at the end sound like "S" "See" or "Z". 

It's supposed to be a "Z" sound as in "zzz" (and in my Canadian head I'm hearing the letter "Z" as "Zed" as that's how many, if not most, Canadians say that letter even though it's the "zee" or "zzz" sounds we utilize in practice). But I find the "S" sound acceptable. "See" or "Zee" just makes me shake my head and giggle, but perhaps I might like them when used as endearments. ?

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8 hours ago, ElizabethStar said:

I noticed women seem more accepting, get excited and squee about things like this.

I'm glad it went well for you.   In my limited experience I have found women more accepting as well.

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@Drayse Congrats and know that I'm a bit jealous. Good luck sweetie. Just know that while we can't physically can't be there, we are all there in spirit cheering you on. You go girl. We are all rooting for you.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Interesting tidbit of a story to addendum to this saga. One of the coworkers who I thought would be a problem when I came out was vocally and visually supportive on that day. But rumours have been getting back to me that he has been dead naming, misgendering me off work hours and property. With charming statements such as "That stupid gay <deadname>...."

 

I don't know if it's true or not that he's doing this as this is hearsay after all. I'm also concerned that if I confront him to confirm the validity of the claim I'll reveal the person whom he said it to, who is both an minor and this particular man's son. But if it is true, I'm not bothered as I predicted that he would be problematic. And "gay" is the worst insult he can think of? I haven't been bothered by that in years, decades even.

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I work with a guy like that. He's been problematic since the beginning of my journey. Even had the nerve to bitch (literally does it all the time) at his supervisor about my low-ish-cut top. She pointed out the fact that she gave me that top and he had no problems when she wore it.

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1 hour ago, ElizabethStar said:

She pointed out the fact that she gave me that top and he had no problems when she wore it.

I love this.

But it is too bad he's an a-hole.

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1 hour ago, ElizabethStar said:

Even had the nerve to bitch (literally does it all the time) at his supervisor about my low-ish-cut top. She pointed out the fact that she gave me that top and he had no problems when she wore it.

 

OMG I love this, thank you for sharing that bit of information it made my day....

 

Rachel

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2 hours ago, ElizabethStar said:

 She pointed out the fact that she gave me that top and he had no problems when she wore it.

 

That gave a me a smile Liz.  That just the sort of thing i would say. I like your supervisor ?

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