Awkward things that happen

[Elizabeth Star]

Nothing too heavy here just strange day-to-day weirdness that you notice or strange new experiences.

 

I was at a Starbucks over the weekend. I felt cute and witchy in all black. Boots, top, skirt, mask, even under clothes all black. While I waited in the holding  area for my coffee a guy comes over by me and starts mumbling to himself about how he can't find his GF. Why is he starting at me? He mumbles around a little more. Keeps staring at me and leaves. Was he checking me out? Trying to clock me? I don't know. All I know is I'm the only woman, out of 4, that he looked at. I look at one of the woman "What just happened?" she just shrugged her shoulders.

 

Went on a service call for work at the office for a housing community. All black again today.  Met the guy outside. As I come around the back of my Jeep he starts"Hey< how's it going buddy...sorry, I thought you were a...... I wish would have finished his statement. It was a pretty easy job. A power transformer was loose in the outlet. Just had to re-bend the prongs on the plug, replace the backup battery and was done. With the same guy had to goto another site around the block.

 

I got my truck over the garage he was waiting. He points a small box up on the wall. A few seconds later He shows up with a ladder for me to use. So I'm up on a ladder, in tight jeans and I swear I could feel him staring at my ass. I finished my work and left.

 

Are my womanly senses kicking in? Can I now sense if someone is checking me out? I think more research is needed.

 

 

[tracy_j]

I have found that I have always had these type of senses and, more sterotypically female, have almost always walked into a room and instantly clocked everyone and the atmosphere without really thinking about it. I think it comes with being sensitve. Moving on to trans times, we do become very sensitive to how we look and feel that we are standing out in the crowd. I think that it takes considerable time to settle down to feminine (or masculine as the case may be) awareness of situations and people rather than over-reaction. It's interesting about the tight jeans and sweater up a ladder. Thinking back I can remember different cis women, some of whom were very nervous in such a position, to the extent of being upset, and others who would deliberately flirt.  It takes all types and is natural.

 

Tracy

[VickySGV]

Women do get checked out, but so do men.  In the time I have been out though it has been 98% because I present as female with only the other 2% having anything to do with my being Trans, and 1 of those percents is by other Trans people, so worrisome check-outs are the tiniest part of it Trans wise.  The largest number of "check outs" I get as a woman are not harmful and are all over the spectrum and up to the imagination as to what is on the mind of the other person.  I have cis women friends who are right there with me and we mostly have a good laugh or in the right times, some hug fests.  I carry myself in public in a generally assertive way that shows I am aware of my surroundings and confident to be in them, which keeps a lot of the check-outs from going in a bad direction, and again my Cis woman friends are right there. So all is good.

 

A sad fact is that when a woman enters a space she is checked out based on body and clothing and sexual potential.  A man is checked out based on his "authority" as a MALE and the goal is to label him as a Leader or a Buddy or a potential victim.  It is a bit different in Gay and Lesbian situations but I will let them tell their  stories.

 

When we first come out we are on hyper alert because of the newness of the situation as well as some of the effects of hormones but things normalize over a year or two.  We do respond much more over time as simply the gender we have been all along inside of us.