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Transgender Day of Visibility


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   This Wednesday will be the TDOV.  Coming out in public as an advocate for our community brings a sense of responsibility along with some fear.  

   Somehow this week is really out there for me.  Today i'm due on a panel of trans* folks speaking and then answering questions from 30+  social workers across the state.  Being a bit of a "Chatty Cathy" i don't know i can cover the # of questions were are given to speak about in the allotted time but i'll do my best.

   Wednesday there is ceremony at the local Town Hall in the evening with the mayor and police chief.  That is even a bit more scary for me.  I like so many of us simply try to live as ourselves after we transition.  The idea of becoming an open spokesperson for our community rather than a simple old woman moving through the world is a bit daunting.  If being visible might help others to live without fear or shame that makes the effort well worth it.  Perhaps that is the whole reason for this day of self "outing".






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@Charlize is not the only one of us taking part in TDOV events this year.  Six Trans Voice choruses in the western U.S. have gotten together for a choral event on Wednesday at Noon PDT.  In addition to one number involving all the choruses, there will be individual presentations by each of them, and individual comments by individual chorus members.  It will be fun for me to see which ones of mine they selected to show.  This is a FUN, "in your face"  and proud day and not the somber, hurt and angry sort of thing Transgender Day Of Remembrance (TDOR) is.  Be you, be visible, be proud and unashamed.

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Delcina B


Thank you, Charlize & Vicky!




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May you find your voices and may they be heard.




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Oh Happy Day. After all those years in hiding.  A day to be visible.  If such a thing had existed when i was young my life may have been so different.  As it is i'm off to the salon to get my nails done before speaking tonight.

Vicky started she is involved in a concert.


Does anyone else have plans?





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  • Forum Moderator

Some trans swag from last nights visibility function.  
Gotta love the Free the Pronnouns!






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On 3/29/2021 at 7:39 AM, Charlize said:

 If being visible might help others to live without fear or shame that makes the effort well worth it.  Perhaps that is the whole reason for this day of self "outing".

It's good for someone struggling to know that they are not the only one.


I did go out yesterday.  Although I live full time, I don't really pass.  But I think that even in this conservative area, it's good to see that we do exist.  And maybe we're not the threat we're made out to be.

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2 hours ago, Jandi said:

And maybe we're not the threat we're made out to be.


In my area, it seems we are a threat. They have passed three laws and the governor has signed two of the so far. One goes as far as allowing denial of some basic medical care. Yesterday I was working outside and kept thinking about what is going on. I finally got mad enough to get on my local TV news Facebook page where they are talking about it and said my peace. Then I sent the governor an email. I doubt I did any good, but it made me feel better.




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Mike, you and several other trans friends in Arkansas are certainly facing some political horrors.  I can only hope that federal legislation can help.  Unfortunately it is really as much a social as a political issue and with right wing media making us a major villain stealth becomes very important.  It may be generations before we see real change.  During the 72 years of my life i've certainly seen great growth.  Our efforts will hopefully help younger folks to find self acceptance.





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3 hours ago, Charlize said:

Unfortunately it is really as much a social as a political issue and with right wing media making us a major villain stealth becomes very important.

Yeah, this.

I know I don't pass when I'm in public, and I seriously doubt that I could.  I'm kinda at the point where I am just accepting that something bad may happen eventually.  I'm 70 myself, and if…  Well, I have had a good life over all.  And I'm grateful for the chance to quit fighting it and be free to live as I was on the inside all along.

I guess I'm kinda pessimistic that this will go well.  I feel like the current administration is just a brief reprieve that won't last.  Look how they treated Rachel Levine in the senate hearings.  These people are only 1 vote away from being back in control.

The XX vs XY argument is an oversimplification that makes sense to people who don't want to educate themselves on the subject.  And "The Bible Says…" thing is there for the self righteous folks.

The Equality Act is not going to pass even though it has broad support.

3 hours ago, Charlize said:

 It may be generations before we see real change.


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Willow Farmer
2 hours ago, Jandi said:

 I'm kinda at the point where I am just accepting that something bad may happen eventually.

Jandi, I understand.  

   When I was 29, I got to a point where I was standing in the dark, in the rain, in the middle of a forest, with a gun to my head because I could not go any further.   I didn't understand trans, and had NO help.   God, Mother Gaia,  my American Indian ancestor, threw the gun.   I did not do it.  

   Fast-forward to 65yrs old and with knowledge and support, I'm going for it.   Now at 68, living in a very rural community,  I am out, loving, caring, and exposed to hate and injury.   A while back when all this mega-hate blew up, I asked myself-----Should I pull back and protect myself?   I decided to remain exposed and love,give and teach.   The worst thing that can happen is someone removing me from this Earth.    I was willing to do that very thing to myself at 29.   I was stopped.   I live every day to love more and hate less.   I hope when I leave this Earth, I have no hate in me.



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