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metalqueen

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warning im often times not good at expressing what im trying to say into words.... and today is one of those days.....

 

im a bit of a dork/nerd in many respects..... i love learning/working on/playing with computers (more so on the hardware side of them), psychology heavily intrigues me and i find myself learning and mapping out peoples personality/traits (whether i meant to or not)..... and while on the topic, i feel its important to say that often times i may say or do something that comes off like im fishing for compliments or biding for attention, but the honest truth is, im not, what is actually happening is im trying to get input from you or whoever so that i can TRY and get an idea of how others perceive and see me. one thing i want more than anything is to be able to be seen as and "pass" for lack of a better word, but my low self esteem and self worth is something that i have issues with seeing past. so i often ask people if any certain pics i have, stand out as really femme looking to them and what it is that makes it that way so that i can try and see those traits as they  do, and just the same i ask if there are any certain things in any of the pics that straight up and quickly give me away, so i can acknowledge those flaws with goals in mind of trying to eliminate them, effectively trying to get myself to a level of self esteem where i feel like i could possibly be maybe thought i was female. so please dont think im just some attn -lovely person- as where i could see how it could easily be mistaken for that.  im really big into fashion (as most are on here are im assuming). im also a huge lover of music (punk and metal) and as well i play guitar. the last big thing about me is im a HUGE anime fangirl.

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10 hours ago, metalqueen said:

im really big into fashion (as most are on here are im assuming).

 

To varying degrees. I think it's more of a, "Help me find out what looks good on me," than a fashionista thing... despite what people keep telling me. I like looking good though so maybe they're on to something. I have to dress down for work though and with COVID... most of the time I dress like a lesbian on laundry day. Lots of t-shirts, jeans and flannel.

 

10 hours ago, metalqueen said:

im also a huge lover of music (punk and metal) and as well i play guitar. the last big thing about me is im a HUGE anime fangirl.

 

Most of our members are creatives in some way or another, be it art, music or writing. Not that many of them are metalheads though. Personally, I'm into all-girl metal bands (and girl-bands in general) but I may be an outlier. ?

The anime is more of a personal taste. I've been into anime since the 80's (I have a bunch of pirate bootlegs, VHS, etc... from the dark ages), but not everybody feels the same. That's a little weird. I mean Ranma exists. How can you be MtF and not into Ranma?

 

Hugs!

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I do think you pass however but remember looking hot, which you do, makes everyone look at you much more closely.  My wife taught me to dress down a bit and as i look around i see the vast majority of women don't dress "hot".  It is easier to pass looking casually beautiful which you can certainly pull off.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

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On 3/30/2021 at 7:16 AM, Charlize said:

I do think you pass however but remember looking hot, which you do, makes everyone look at you much more closely.  My wife taught me to dress down a bit and as i look around i see the vast majority of women don't dress "hot".  It is easier to pass looking casually beautiful which you can certainly pull off.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

^ This.   Often people tend to hyper sexualize/feminize in fashion and makeup at first. I mean, really, who doesn't want to be hot but as someone transitioning it does bring extra scrutiny.  You have a feminine facial structure- congrats! Great eyes, high cheekbones  and a slim,angular jawline/chin. Your biggest challenge for passing will be 5 o'clock shadow from having a dark beard which requires a lot of makeup to cover.  What you save from not having to do any facial feminization surgery you could spend on hair removal so that you wouldn't need makeup or at worst, lighter makeup.

Welcome to the forum

Bri

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If you have low self esteem and low self worth, it won't be helped by seeking external validation like this from others. I have enjoyed my transition much more when I stopped worrying about passing and stopped posting selfies everywhere. Some things just can't be changed without surgery and that's not something I want to do. Otherwise, I think you look fine, despite not passing in any of your photos. Consider that most of us, even on HRT, will not pass, especially when looked at by certain angles, which is why there exists what I call the "trans selfie" -  looking down with the head turned, with lots of filtering and makeup. 

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On 3/30/2021 at 4:05 AM, Jackie C. said:

 

To varying degrees. I think it's more of a, "Help me find out what looks good on me," than a fashionista thing... despite what people keep telling me. I like looking good though so maybe they're on to something. I have to dress down for work though and with COVID... most of the time I dress like a lesbian on laundry day. Lots of t-shirts, jeans and flannel.

 

 

Most of our members are creatives in some way or another, be it art, music or writing. Not that many of them are metalheads though. Personally, I'm into all-girl metal bands (and girl-bands in general) but I may be an outlier. ?

The anime is more of a personal taste. I've been into anime since the 80's (I have a bunch of pirate bootlegs, VHS, etc... from the dark ages), but not everybody feels the same. That's a little weird. I mean Ranma exists. How can you be MtF and not into Ranma?

 

Hugs!

 

a few more good anime with crossdressing are "I, my me strawberry eggs", "is this a zombie" and "bake and test summon the beasts"...

 

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Oh, I'd completely forgotten the "magical girl crossdressing" thing in Is This Zombie? That was a surprisingly fun watch.

 

Hugs!

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