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Living every man's fantasy.


Red_Lauren.

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Since I transitioned I have noticed one thing. All my girlfriend's are beautiful. Like beautiful that if you them saw alone in a bar. You know you wouldn't approach them beautiful, because you know they are out of your league beautiful. 

 

Who would have guessed. That becoming the ugly chick would have had these benefits. In reality they knew me before, and they knew I was harmless to them.

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You know, some of my friends who are that beautiful are some of the loneliest and most insecure women I know.  I am "ordinary" and "Age appropriate" but I am rarely lonely in places I go.  Now I am just "another woman" and get to know these DDG girls who are left alone with their drinks because they are intimidating to men, and even the really special appearing men.  The two groups do not always mix well it seems but the myth is out there about both groups.  While not a mistake really, before I came out I had the wrong impression of what it was like.  Be kind and do not declare yourself to be ugly or plain but take advantage of your ease at meeting some wonderful people who are lonely and see your presence as light and support for them.

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2 hours ago, VickySGV said:

Be kind and do not declare yourself to be ugly or plain but take advantage of your ease at meeting some wonderful people who are lonely and see your presence as light and support for them.

Lovely sentiment!

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9 hours ago, Red_Lauren. said:

That becoming the ugly chick

I don't post much, I come here and just read, but I have to comment on your statement.

 

Beauty is what's in your heart!!! Please be kind to yourself!

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8 hours ago, VickySGV said:

You know, some of my friends who are that beautiful are some of the loneliest and most insecure women I know.  I am "ordinary" and "Age appropriate" but I am rarely lonely in places I go.  Now I am just "another woman" and get to know these DDG girls who are left alone with their drinks because they are intimidating to men, and even the really special appearing men.  The two groups do not always mix well it seems but the myth is out there about both groups.  While not a mistake really, before I came out I had the wrong impression of what it was like.  Be kind and do not declare yourself to be ugly or plain but take advantage of your ease at meeting some wonderful people who are lonely and see your presence as light and support for them.

I'm actually the lonely one. I don't have kids, or a spouse to come home to unlike them. I worked 60-70 hours a week most of my adult life, so I wouldn't have to sit at home alone, and im paying for it now. That im only working 40 hours a week, I have more alone time, and its killing me. 

 

I ment this post to make people laugh. I have a very dark sense of humor, and have no problem with self depriving humor. I don't have a issue with how I look. It was just me trying to be funny. 

 

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I've started hanging round with more women than men. Often now, I find myself being interrogated by my previous friends wives. I have realised actually, that women can be terribly bitchy and very materialistic and somewhat shallow. It kinda makes me feel I don't fit into either camp. And so I find myself once again in the company of one :D. I don't mind though, as I'm being me haha.

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All of my new inner circle drive luxury brand cars. Bmw, bennz, Lexus. While they aren't the top teir ones. They definitely aren't the cheaper ones either. Most when new definitely were over 40k. While I'm really not much better. I drive a 40k subaru, but I didn't buy my car as a status symbol. I bought it because of Colin macree, and my love for rally racing. 

 

I know for sure one friend has had money issues in the past, and likes to have this certain lifestyle. That I feel bad that I know she's in debt to live a life she can't afford. I'm also guessing she's a bit of a bitch to work for also. As I have only known her for a year and a half, and has had at least 4 employees. For now though. I have seen a change in her attitude over the last year though. She really got humbled by coivd shutting her down for a few months, and probably the big thing was her getting breast cancer. Only time will tell. If she remains humble or not. 

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You made me look that up. My car was $25K new. Top of her class for safety and reliability in her model year. Naturally, they don't make them anymore.

 

Honestly, most of my friends look better than I do, but they treat me just like any other older woman and that's what I wanted so... yeah. We're a little older than you though so there's less hanging out in bars and being hot. We did spend like twenty minutes though chatting about men's shortcomings in the bedroom this morning. That was a hoot. Probably not every man's fantasy though. ?

 

Hugs!

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I've just got off the phone from one of my new friends. Lisa is lovely, bit of a bimbo, boob job etc... And drives a SLK Mercedes! How similar does this sound? She asked if we can meet. Sure, what's the problem I ask?  Can I service her car?  I told her I don't do that sort of thing anymore. She's skint and its gone into limp mode. 

Anyway, I'm breaking nails tomorrow :(

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2 hours ago, Jackie C. said:

You made me look that up. My car was $25K new. Top of her class for safety and reliability in her model year. Naturally, they don't make them anymore.

 

Honestly, most of my friends look better than I do, but they treat me just like any other older woman and that's what I wanted so... yeah. We're a little older than you though so there's less hanging out in bars and being hot. We did spend like twenty minutes though chatting about men's shortcomings in the bedroom this morning. That was a hoot. Probably not every man's fantasy though. ?

 

Hugs!

The only reason I know the rough prices of their cars. Is because know cars. Cars are my shoes. As for men's short cummings. My friend's will talk about that stuff to me, and not even bat a eye. I think they tell me for a few reasons. Im still into woman, and they forget I was a man most of the time. Honestly me becoming a woman has benefitted also, as I have gotten better tips when it comes to woman. That as a guy we just never hear. 

1 hour ago, LusciousTheLock said:

I've just got off the phone from one of my new friends. Lisa is lovely, bit of a bimbo, boob job etc... And drives a SLK Mercedes! How similar does this sound? She asked if we can meet. Sure, what's the problem I ask?  Can I service her car?  I told her I don't do that sort of thing anymore. She's skint and its gone into limp mode. 

Anyway, I'm breaking nails tomorrow :(

As munch as I love German cars. I would never pull the trigger on one. A friend had a older audi a4 I believe. I cant recall the model, but it was a 4door with 2.5 turbo v6. He had to spend dang near 2k for shocks on that thing. Plus another 3k on the fuel system. I thought that was crazy. For around 2k I can get a set of really good race quality coils for my suabru. 

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I don't mind German cars, its probs easier for me as I'm in Europe and there are lots of dealers. They certainly don't make them like they used to though. I used to tear about in a 1973 BMW 2002 Touring Turbo. Sadly sold before prices went silly. That would be a £30k car these days. My current car turns 50 this year :) 1971 Hillman Hunter Gls. Holbay H120 engine on Twin Webber carbs. No sensors, no electrics to wrong, no emission equipment.

 

I am trying my best to distance myself from being a petrolhead though. It set's me off.   

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7 hours ago, LusciousTheLock said:

I don't mind German cars, its probs easier for me as I'm in Europe and there are lots of dealers. They certainly don't make them like they used to though. I used to tear about in a 1973 BMW 2002 Touring Turbo. Sadly sold before prices went silly. That would be a £30k car these days. My current car turns 50 this year :) 1971 Hillman Hunter Gls. Holbay H120 engine on Twin Webber carbs. No sensors, no electrics to wrong, no emission equipment.

 

I am trying my best to distance myself from being a petrolhead though. It set's me off.   

Well German cars use to be good here. Since about 95 or so. When they became more computer dependent was when they went down hill. Its just not the lack of service. Most cities over 50k generally have some sort of dealer of luxury brands. Its the fact that they break so munch, and general care cost, and parts are so munch more. Its not uncommon for people to lease these, or trade them in before the warranty is out. You can find all sorts of 3-5 year old entry level German cars with under 50k miles on them used. 

 

I will never leave my cars. They are my drug of choice. my sti has a straight pipe exhaust. I can hear the turbo spooling up when under load, and it makes me giggle like a little girl even today. 

 

 

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14 hours ago, LusciousTheLock said:

 :) 1971 Hillman Hunter Gls. Holbay H120 engine on Twin Webber carbs. No sensors, no electrics to wrong, no emission equipment.

 

 

 

 

Wow Lus You are going back a bit. I would love a picture of that I havent seen one of those in ages. Many years ago I had an Avenger with GT badges stuck on it. It wasnt a GT in any sense of the word. Drop me a picture when you have time. I was actually always brought up with Fords. My old dad had numourous Mk1 Cortinas. My only real dip in the ford ocean was a Mk1 facelift Capri. The first ever car that I brought with my own money. Im so showing my age now lol. Im glad i dont look it

 

Anyway. Back on topic.

 

Simply Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.  If you use the above as a guide. I think Citreons are an abormination to my eyes. But others love them.  You cant please all of the people all of the time. But why would you want to? Its an old rule of thumb. But I always go for how big a persons heart is. Looks are just skin deep.

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2 hours ago, Maid In Bedlam said:Simply Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.  If you use the above as a guide. I think Citreons are an abormination to my eyes. But others love them.  You cant please all of the people all of the time. But why would you want to? Its an old rule of thumb. But I always go for how big a persons heart is. Looks are just skin deep.

 

Yea, all my friends now do have big hearts, and I know they care about me. Just like I care about them. Its just hard to look at these woman some days. Knowing ill never be as good looking as them. They do say I look good, and am beautiful, but I wonder if they really mean it or are saying it because they are my friends. I'm hoping its because I really am beautiful. Its not like we are in competition with eachother over men, and they know im not in to men. 

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Friends are friends. We prob's are pidgeon-holed to a certain extent among our social groups. The fat one, the thin one, the bimbo, the trans one... That's not the point. Be the individual. be the best you x  

 

Maid in Bedlam, here is a dodgy 11yr old Youtube video, filmed on a potatoe of me getting a custom exhaust on the car. It's Shell is actually a Humber Sceptre (Posh Hillman Hunter) running the GLS internals. She now features a satin black bonnet and Lotus Cortina wheels, but is up on axle stands at the moment due to a core plug rotting out on the back of the engine inside the gearbox bellhousing. I was a Ford man, but prices went silly, about six months before I bought this lol. Sold a MK2 JPS Capri just prior to this. And I still can't believe I gave away an RS Mexico to a security guard at work, because it had a chip in the windscreen and I couldn't be bothered to MOT it. It would easily be worth 30k now as was near mint. That would have been 2005! Anyway- humber sceptre custom built stainless steel exhaust system from styledynamics.co.uk / styledynamix - YouTube 

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4 hours ago, LusciousTheLock said:

Friends are friends. We prob's are pidgeon-holed to a certain extent among our social groups. The fat one, the thin one, the bimbo, the trans one... That's not the point. Be the individual. be the best you x  

I laughed at this way to hard, but for a good reason. Im for the fat trans lesbian of my group. Now that I think about it. My group checks all the Diversity boxes. I have a black lady from Jamaica, A Asian from the SE Asia area, I blond skinny bitch who beat cancer, Then me A fat trans woman who is in to woman. Maybe we should start a band, or our own super hero group. 

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15 hours ago, LusciousTheLock said:

 

 

Maid in Bedlam, here is a dodgy 11yr old Youtube video, filmed on a potatoe of me getting a custom exhaust on the car I still can't believe I gave away an RS Mexico to a security guard at work, because it had a chip in the windscreen

 

Yes it is pretty grainy. But when you do get it back to its glory then take a few for me. isnt it funny how they all came in that colour :)

 

Also:

 

Ill be your security guard if you fancy if you going to be giving away a Mexi!

 

I have a passion for shall we say older cars. Always fancied an XR3i.

 

Rag top of course and if i ever do win the lottery then ill be on the lookout for one. You can take the girl out of Essex and all that.

 

12 hours ago, Red_Lauren. said:

we should start a band, or our own super hero group. 

 

Thunder Force springs to mind. Ironically I just watched that film. Melissa McCarthy, I absolutly adore.

 

But thats not why you posted.

 

Women i think you find look deeper than what wrapping you have. I do personally. I dont really give a monkeys if a guy looks like some greek god. If he has the empathy and is as deep as a small puddle then i would steer well clear. As far as my freinds go. Fat, thin black, white or green with yellow spots I judge them on how they conduct themselves. I dont have a quatity of freinds. I go for quality. As im sure your freinds do to. So i would take there feelings on you and most certainly run with it as they will be the ones who are still there when your old and grey and not fly by nights. There was a saying if i recall Martin Luther King once said he longed for the day when a man would be judged not by the color of his skin but by the content of his character.

 

The same rules apply even if the wording maybe diffrent a little. You are being judged by your thoughts and deeds and not the wrapping.

 

Wouldnt it be nice if the world really did this and not base everything on how aesthetically pleasing it may be.

 

 

 

 

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On 4/11/2021 at 12:18 AM, Maid In Bedlam said:

 

Yes it is pretty grainy. But when you do get it back to its glory then take a few for me. isnt it funny how they all came in that colour :)

 

Also:

 

Ill be your security guard if you fancy if you going to be giving away a Mexi!

 

I have a passion for shall we say older cars. Always fancied an XR3i.

 

Rag top of course and if i ever do win the lottery then ill be on the lookout for one. You can take the girl out of Essex and all that.

 

 

Thunder Force springs to mind. Ironically I just watched that film. Melissa McCarthy, I absolutly adore.

 

But thats not why you posted.

 

Women i think you find look deeper than what wrapping you have. I do personally. I dont really give a monkeys if a guy looks like some greek god. If he has the empathy and is as deep as a small puddle then i would steer well clear. As far as my freinds go. Fat, thin black, white or green with yellow spots I judge them on how they conduct themselves. I dont have a quatity of freinds. I go for quality. As im sure your freinds do to. So i would take there feelings on you and most certainly run with it as they will be the ones who are still there when your old and grey and not fly by nights. There was a saying if i recall Martin Luther King once said he longed for the day when a man would be judged not by the color of his skin but by the content of his character.

 

The same rules apply even if the wording maybe diffrent a little. You are being judged by your thoughts and deeds and not the wrapping.

 

Wouldnt it be nice if the world really did this and not base everything on how aesthetically pleasing it may be.

 

 

 

 

I wish all woman never judged a book by its cover, but both woman and men in there 20s generally do. Because of those experiences I gave up dating by my mid 20s. A lot of woman that only saw the outside. Passed at a great person. Maybe not a perfect person, but I would have been a great spouse. 

 

As for my friends. What friends I do have now is small. I never really cared to have 50 friends. My current female friends all came into my life pretty recently, and all before I transitioned, so now they get to see me change. I know they also don't judge a book by the cover. Its kinda hard to do that at their ages. When they have been through a lot of bs them selfs. 

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      It is a lifesaver for a lot of us.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Thanks.  What I do as a man is what a woman would do if she were a man.  There is just something feminine about the way I act as a man.  It's not that being a woman is actually better, or something to aspire to, but it is just that I am one, while not being one.   If beating my head bloody to get rid off this stupid dysphoria would fix it I would find the nearest wall, but I know that if I did that, when I woke up, it would still be there.   If I did not have this struggle I would be someone else and I would be less of a person than I am.  They say an oak tree growing in an open field is far stronger than one in a forest.  The storms come and go and I stand.   This forum is the first time I have interacted with other people struggling with the same struggle and parallel struggles. It helps.
    • Ashley0616
      I'm sorry! :( Hopefully something better will come up
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