how can I pass better in general?

[whatishappening]

My body is pretty feminine-looking, and I can’t start T yet. I’ve been exercising a little, but nothing’s really changed. I have a binder, and wear it often, but my waist is pretty wide and my thighs are kinda chonky. I don’t really mind my height much (I’m about 5’4), but pretty much everything else about my body bothers me. I want to look kinda twinkish(???) If that makes any sense. I like wearing skirts every once in a while, but I don’t like the dysphoria that comes with it. I want people to look at me and be like, “why’s that guy wearing a skirt?” But it’s very rare that people actually gender me correctly. I have short hair, and I wear pretty masculine clothes (basically just loose t-shirts, hoodies and sweatpants). I’d like my voice to be a little bit deeper, but not very deep, and when I start T I probably won’t get much facial hair because of genetics (which I’m fine with). Are there any ways I could pass better while still occasionally wearing more feminine things? Any tips help. Thanks!

[Jackie C.]

While I'm not an expert (Hey, I went the other way), I can say that it takes a LOT of weight training to build big muscles on E. You'd want to focus on your upper body (Arms, chest, shoulders) and core work (Waist, obliques). Fun fact: If you do your obliques (those are the muscles on either side of your waist) with a weight, the muscle swells and you'll have a more boyish appearance. The thing is, that if your body is only producing female levels of T, it's going to take a pretty major lifestyle change. I spend two hours in the gym every morning and I pass pretty easily as female. If you want to build muscle mass, it's gonna be work.

 

Otherwise, you seem pretty on-point. Binder. Short hair, etc... I'm sure some of our other FtMs can chime in with better advice, but Welcome to Transpulse! We're glad you're here!

 

Hugs!

[whatishappening]

Thank you!

[VickySGV]

4 hours ago, whatishappening said:

I like wearing skirts every once in a while, but I don’t like the dysphoria that comes with it. I want people to look at me and be like, “why’s that guy wearing a skirt?”

 

The Scots and Irish, and gay men I know wear a Kilt which is a skirt of sorts.  I have a couple used for various statements I like to make. Mine are not tartan plaid, one is black and another is a pinstriped fabric, but definitely male attire to most people.  For me they are gender neutral.  Utilikilt and Stump Town Kilts are where I have gotten mine.

[DonkeySocks]

Plaid flannels in a size or two larger than your usual shirt size. Lace-up boots or ankle-high shoes, even if you're in a skirt. A masculine hat over the short haircut. Turtleneck shirt or sweater. Leather bracelets/wristlets or a masculine watch. So many people associate skirts with females that they will gender based on the skirt without looking at anything else, but if you're in pants, a hat can really help. Also, straight-cut jeans look more generically masculine than sweatpants do, I think. You will have to experiment with size because of the men's jeans not being made for your hips. If you live in an area with a farm store that sells Carhartt brand jeans you might try those.

 

When you want to look twink and still make people do a double-take, you might try a hat, a button-down shirt that's more dressy than flannel, but still a size or two larger so it won't fit your curves too closely, and high-top shoes. All that with a skirt. Also, plaid skirts might make people think more masculine, depending on the color.

[DonkeySocks]

Oh, and I think a loose, long skirt looks more gender-neutral than a form-hugging knee-length skirt, when you have thigh/hip curves. Kinda draw the eye down to the lower leg instead of sticking at the curves.

[Ivy]

5 hours ago, DonkeySocks said:

So many people associate skirts with females that they will gender based on the skirt without looking at anything else

Yeah, I'm on the other side of this too, but it does seem to me that it would be hard to pull off.  Around here, a guy would get noticed even in a kilt - unless they're at the Highland Games or something.  I don't think you really want to get noticed.

Just my opinion of course.