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Coping with people leaving you in your life


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Taylor_The_Human

Hi, I'm so sorry for even doing this because I feel sort of selfish for doing this but.. Lately a lot of people have been leaving my life like close friends for example. My best friend doesn't even bother to contact me anymore and when I contact her I get ghosted most of the time or if she responds it's always over a dumb topic that I could care less about. I really miss her and it's been 2 years at least since I've last seen her due to COVID. The other day I saw her story filled with pictures with an old crush of mine. I'm not jealous but I feel depressed about it, I'm a very sensitive person and I know this is really pathetic because I'm sure many other people are going through the same thing but she was really close to me. I used to consider her as a sibling even because we'd hang out nearly everyday and now she's not really apart of my life anymore and that bothers me. I've known her since middle school grade 7 and I'm in grade 9 now that person she's hanging out with is still in 8th grade and my best friend is either in 9th or 10th which are the beginning years of high school. She was a bit older than me but she was still in my grades somehow despite always having straight A's. Maybe she's been busy with school..? But even so when we were in middle school she'd always do her homework after we'd hangout so I don't see why she wouldn't be able to hang out and honestly considering this to be an excuse for her would just be me trying to protect my own feelings towards her. My mom prevents me from going with friends since I have preexisting medical conditions and contracting the virus could prove fatal for me and other family members. I'm scared of losing more friends since I have abandonment issues from my father...But it seems like this is happening regularly even before COVID. I feel hopeless and feel that I should avoid people so I cannot become friends with anyone. I know being lonely isn't much better but it feels better than getting hurt every time you lose someone. I have severe social anxiety so even if I did try to make friends it proves quite a challenge. The state I live in as well has a lot of people that don't like the community and so it's harder to make friends that would support and protect you from crazy people. My friend was so supportive and even offered to get me a binder, something I've wanted for a year at least since I've experienced dysphoria. She was sort of like a counselor someone who didn't leave when time's were rough. My anxiety has gotten worse since this incident which was very recent. I almost didn't leave the house on the weekend because I was so depressed and was crying and still am. I'm sorry for even writing this. I know other people need more help than me but I was hoping someone could give me advice and change my mind about avoiding people. 

 

I'm sorry for wasting your time.

-Taylor. 

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@Taylor_The_Human first of all you are NOT wasting anyone's time. You are important and when you are hurting you need someone to talk to. I'm glad you can openly discuss how you feel here and I'm sure others know how you feel and can relate. I sure can. 

I don't know if this will help but - I do want you to know I've suffered with depression, anxiety, anorexia, and aboandonment and rejection. I know how it feels when someone dear goes out of your life. My first wife did that very thing and it took me a long time to finally realize that taking care of yourself is all you can do. You are the only one in this world you can do anything about.

Thmost import thing to remember is you need to love yourself and be you, not what anything else wants you to be. YOU ARE YOU and that is extremely important. You can't give what you don't have so - learn to love yourself and be yourself. 

AND YOU CAN AND WILL MAKE IT.

When you treat yourself and relax and enjoy doing the things YOU like to do you will attract others to you who will be wonderful for you and to you. 

Unfortunately in this life people will come and go but you will find others who are meant to be there and sometimes it comes out of nowhere. 

An example is - when I joined this forum just under a year ago - I met 3 new friends here who are closer than any of the friends I ever had and it came out of nowhere.

Remember - you are loved and we care deeply about you and you are important and very special. Hang in there - it will get better.

Hugs,

Heather Shay

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Taylor_The_Human
2 hours ago, Shay said:

@Taylor_The_Human first of all you are NOT wasting anyone's time. You are important and when you are hurting you need someone to talk to. I'm glad you can openly discuss how you feel here and I'm sure others know how you feel and can relate. I sure can. 

I don't know if this will help but - I do want you to know I've suffered with depression, anxiety, anorexia, and aboandonment and rejection. I know how it feels when someone dear goes out of your life. My first wife did that very thing and it took me a long time to finally realize that taking care of yourself is all you can do. You are the only one in this world you can do anything about.

Thmost import thing to remember is you need to love yourself and be you, not what anything else wants you to be. YOU ARE YOU and that is extremely important. You can't give what you don't have so - learn to love yourself and be yourself. 

AND YOU CAN AND WILL MAKE IT.

When you treat yourself and relax and enjoy doing the things YOU like to do you will attract others to you who will be wonderful for you and to you. 

Unfortunately in this life people will come and go but you will find others who are meant to be there and sometimes it comes out of nowhere. 

An example is - when I joined this forum just under a year ago - I met 3 new friends here who are closer than any of the friends I ever had and it came out of nowhere.

Remember - you are loved and we care deeply about you and you are important and very special. Hang in there - it will get better.

Hugs,

Heather Shay

Thanks Heather Shay, I'm sure it'll get better I'm just blowing things out of proportion probably. I think these thoughts are just my anxiety speaking. 

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Letting out steam is absolutely fine and normal - after all your name implies what you are and what you are felling is definitely HUMAN.

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Taylor_The_Human

 

2 hours ago, Shay said:

Letting out steam is absolutely fine and normal - after all your name implies what you are and what you are felling is definitely HUMAN.

Thanks I feel better now. 🙂

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I am glad. 💖

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