Feeling guilty over how easy transition has been.

[Red_Lauren.]

When I hear stories of trans people losing everything. I feel guilty a lot of times. Especially when I compare my journey to theirs. I know I shouldn't, but I do.

 

I didn't take baby steps. I jumped in to the deep end. I figured at 35 with a dead end job, no wife, kids, and what I thought no one liking me. I had nothing to lose. Other then my life. 

 

So far im doing great. I haven't had to resort to sex work. I'm working on a career I want to do succeed in for the first time ever. I'm making more money then I ever did as a man. Every one I have told is still in the picture, and that is why I feel guilt. I'm having the time of my life, while a lot of use are struggling. I know I shouldn't feel that way, but I can't help it. 

[tracy_j]

I am glad things are going well with you. They vary for us all and most everyone has various issues they do have to deal with. It is often how they approach things that makes all the difference. It's building up confidence which tends to improve things greatly. The different circumstances of everyone makes each route different. You seem to have chosen yours well. It makes me happy and I would say that you have no need to feel guilty.

 

Tracy

[mmspc]

On 6/3/2021 at 11:31 PM, Red_Lauren. said:

When I hear stories of trans people losing everything. I feel guilty a lot of times. Especially when I compare my journey to theirs. I know I shouldn't, but I do.

 

I didn't take baby steps. I jumped in to the deep end. I figured at 35 with a dead end job, no wife, kids, and what I thought no one liking me. I had nothing to lose. Other then my life. 

 

So far im doing great. I haven't had to resort to sex work. I'm working on a career I want to do succeed in for the first time ever. I'm making more money then I ever did as a man. Every one I have told is still in the picture, and that is why I feel guilt. I'm having the time of my life, while a lot of use are struggling. I know I shouldn't feel that way, but I can't help it. 

I never feel guilty when things go easily for me.  I always figure there's a reason for it, and usually it's a good reason that speaks positively of myself.  I know it's quite popular these days to blame failures, shortcomings, and unhappiness on other folk's oppression, but I've found that an awful lot of the time negatives in my life are my own dar n  fault.

 

This post reminds me of an old tennis adage, "Never change a winning game, always change a losing one."  Seems like that might be applicable to a lot of personal success stories.

 

Glad things are going well.  Best wishes.

 

 

 

[Heather Shay]

@Red_Lauren. consider yourself fortunate and consider your mission to confort and support those who do have issues and really need to hear from you to help them feel wanted.

[Elizabeth Star]

I feel a little guilt. My whole life has turned around for the better. Yet, there are so many who's lives have gotten worse. Sure my wife and I are struggling but thing are, at a turtle's pace, getting better. I do like to talk about the good things that happen but kinda feel like it may hurt others who aren't as lucky.

[Red_Lauren.]

17 hours ago, Elizabeth Star said:

I feel a little guilt. My whole life has turned around for the better. Yet, there are so many who's lives have gotten worse. Sure my wife and I are struggling but thing are, at a turtle's pace, getting better. I do like to talk about the good things that happen but kinda feel like it may hurt others who aren't as lucky.

Thats exactly why I feel guilt. I don't like to talk about the postives. Especially when I was in their shoes, and wasn't sure it transition was ever going to be a thing. I have two girlfriend's who are like sisters to me, and they both care about me, and love hearing about changes in me, but one is a breast cancer survivor. She knows I'm growing breast, and im happy about it, but she didn't get the overly excited text. My other friend got. When I noticed I they grew. 

 

19 hours ago, mmspc said:

I never feel guilty when things go easily for me.  I always figure there's a reason for it, and usually it's a good reason that speaks positively of myself.  I know it's quite popular these days to blame failures, shortcomings, and unhappiness on other folk's oppression, but I've found that an awful lot of the time negatives in my life are my own dar n  fault.

 

This post reminds me of an old tennis adage, "Never change a winning game, always change a losing one."  Seems like that might be applicable to a lot of personal success stories.

 

Glad things are going well.  Best wishes.

 

 

 

I never blamed any one for my problems. Other then when I had no control over them when I was considered a minor. I'll take full as a adult. 

[MirandaB]

I so enjoy positive stories, sure, I get jealous sometimes, but there’s enough negativity out there about people like us that it’s nice to hear happy stories.