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Natalie71645

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Hi everyone,

 

Im five and a half months into HRT.  I don't drink every day, but I almost feel like I have a compulsion to every day off from work.  On top of that I do, and think things I would never think sober.  I think of self harming, which is something I had a problem with in the past, but not in years.  Also this past time I smoked which is something else I haven't done in years.  I talk to people online I would never talk to sober.  I even sent a topless picture to someone I didn't know one of these times.  I've had problems with alcohol in the past, like pretty bad.  Some drugs too but mainly alcohol.  I could go into specifics but the point is that between dysphoria, work, kids, and a divorce, life is stressful.  My days off don't feel like days off any more unless I have a bottle of wine after the kids are in bed.  For a couple months now I've said I'm not going to do it on my next day off, but I still do.  My x (who um still friends with) doesn't really care as long as I'm still holding down the job.  I haven't been to a meeting since before I met my x, and I'm considering starting up again.  I just want a trans friendly one.  Any way that's life right now.  I'm just lonely.

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  • Admin

@Natalie71645 There are several of us here who know the value and Joy of Sobriety and the help it has given us in navigating the challenges of being Trans.  I have almost 13 years by now and my story is here in this forum going back to 2011 when I joined here.  Another one of our Sobriety Crowd @Charlize is deeply involved in Online AA /*A meetings for Trans people, and over on Face Book I am a moderator for a group there where more local Meetings of Trans people are posted.  Trans meetings may include several addiction types, but that is working out fine wherever I see it.  Doing this Trans stuff without the booze is much easier and more fun.  This is your third post and when you have 5 posts you can use the PM feature if you need one of us to talk to here on the Forums.  Life will be so much nicer no matter your fears not having to make love to the booze.

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Natalie, Glad you're here! For me sobriety allowed me to honestly see & accept me for who I am, transgender. Where this journey takes me I don't yet know, but to see & live the femme in me without the fog & depression of alcohol today gives me serenity.

 

Hugs!

Delcina

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  • Forum Moderator

   Alcohol and other substance abuse  is certainly not restricted to the straight cis world. I don't know if that was what led me down a road that left me shaking and hallucinating, needing a drink but finding it no longer helped  with the pain.

I was going to the rooms of AA and was sober for some time before i transitioned.  Today i find comfort, friendship, sobriety  and peace in any meeting i attend. 

   I found the tgaa group which meets now on Zoom 4 nights a week around 9 years ago.  Several other members of Trans Pulse also attend meetings there.  here is a link to a post here that would get you started to joining us there.  We do have a  safe group as far as online security so signing in may be slightly more difficult than some other on line sites. 

    

I just wanted the folks here who have or think they may have a drinking problem that there are at this point 4 transgendered Zoom meetings available. The times are Thursday at 9:00 eastern, Saturday at 6:00 eastern and Monday at 7:00 eastern (now Sunday at 8:00 EST as well). I have found them to be wonderful with the trans* spectrum from all around the word in real time meetings. It is also possible to not turn on a camera if one is worried about privacy.

I am not the only person from Trans Pulse who attends. If going to real life straight meeting is difficult or not, these meetings offer a great alternative. To join us please an e-mail to https://oso-aa.org/mailman/listinfo/tggroup_oso-aa.org . You will be sent links to join us. or PM me here at Trans Pulse and i'll help.

Hope to see you there.

Hugs,

Charlize

 

 

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Thank you I'll take a look.  Other issue is I don't have much privacy at home, and I work 3-11 most days, but I'm sure I can make one of them work on one of my days off.  Thank you for the resources.

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  • 1 month later...

Hi Natalie (and everyone else): I found the pandemic was becoming a drinking problem for me and through my therapist, I found Moderation Management, a website that has meetings on Zoom, there are specific meetings for all purposes. I recommend you go to the website and find one (or two) that fits your schedule. Just give it a try, maybe it can help without the narrow constraints of AA guilt. Moderation Management is just that, not the strict abstinence AA is based on. They encourage having a plan and provide ways to help you achieve your goals. It is a place to go and express yourself with out judgement. Only supportive peers and it's totally confidential.

Hugs, Wanda 

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  • 4 weeks later...
On 6/5/2021 at 9:58 PM, Natalie71645 said:

Hi everyone,

 

Im five and a half months into HRT.  I don't drink every day, but I almost feel like I have a compulsion to every day off from work.  On top of that I do, and think things I would never think sober.  I think of self harming, which is something I had a problem with in the past, but not in years.  Also this past time I smoked which is something else I haven't done in years.  I talk to people online I would never talk to sober.  I even sent a topless picture to someone I didn't know one of these times.  I've had problems with alcohol in the past, like pretty bad.  Some drugs too but mainly alcohol.  I could go into specifics but the point is that between dysphoria, work, kids, and a divorce, life is stressful.  My days off don't feel like days off any more unless I have a bottle of wine after the kids are in bed.  For a couple months now I've said I'm not going to do it on my next day off, but I still do.  My x (who um still friends with) doesn't really care as long as I'm still holding down the job.  I haven't been to a meeting since before I met my x, and I'm considering starting up again.  I just want a trans friendly one.  Any way that's life right now.  I'm just lonely.

Hey, I am working on this too. I had a black out last Saturday (not yesterday but week before) from bourbon. I have dangerous binge drinking episodes and do get into period of daily drinking after work. I have cravings and on stressful days just really need it. Strangely I have been thinking about picking up smoking cigarettes as well but so far have been able to stave that off. I've been having a great time with my local AA meetings. They are very accepting of me, don't care at all that I am trans and tell me to keep coming back. I have sponsor now and she said that while she doesn't understand trans issues very well, she will try. Most people including my sponsor gender me right. I live in a conservative area and I'm one of very few trans people that are out and visible at least, but as I understand it the spirit of AA is to be welcoming and accepting of all people, it is kind of set in the program to help people be more open about things.

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  • Forum Moderator

I'm so glad you shared with us here Rainflower.  I can relate to that craving.  I seems miracle that over time that need has gone away.  Like you i found acceptance and support in AA.  

If you are interested please do join us at TGAA.  We meet on Zoom 4 evenings a week with other AA trans folks from all around the country and world.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

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On 8/8/2021 at 1:31 PM, Charlize said:

I'm so glad you shared with us here Rainflower.  I can relate to that craving.  I seems miracle that over time that need has gone away.  Like you i found acceptance and support in AA.  

If you are interested please do join us at TGAA.  We meet on Zoom 4 evenings a week with other AA trans folks from all around the country and world.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

Thanks, I might drop in some time. How do I get the zoom link?

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  • Forum Moderator

To join us please an e-mail to https://oso-aa.org/mailman/listinfo/tggroup_oso-aa.org 

We do have a bit of a sign in process so that we are safe.  Some members are long term stealth while others are exploring their gender feelings.  We all have an issue with alcohol (and substances) as well as gender issues.  TGAA gives us a safe and supportive space.

Hugs,

 

Charlize

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10 hours ago, Charlize said:

To join us please an e-mail to https://oso-aa.org/mailman/listinfo/tggroup_oso-aa.org 

We do have a bit of a sign in process so that we are safe.  Some members are long term stealth while others are exploring their gender feelings.  We all have an issue with alcohol (and substances) as well as gender issues.  TGAA gives us a safe and supportive space.

Hugs,

 

Charlize

Ok, I submitted the form on that page.

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  • Forum Moderator

Great!  Hope to see you soon.

We have the list serve but ask to join the Zoom meetings and you will get set up.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

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