Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Think might need help


Natalie71645

Recommended Posts

Hi everyone,

 

Im five and a half months into HRT.  I don't drink every day, but I almost feel like I have a compulsion to every day off from work.  On top of that I do, and think things I would never think sober.  I think of self harming, which is something I had a problem with in the past, but not in years.  Also this past time I smoked which is something else I haven't done in years.  I talk to people online I would never talk to sober.  I even sent a topless picture to someone I didn't know one of these times.  I've had problems with alcohol in the past, like pretty bad.  Some drugs too but mainly alcohol.  I could go into specifics but the point is that between dysphoria, work, kids, and a divorce, life is stressful.  My days off don't feel like days off any more unless I have a bottle of wine after the kids are in bed.  For a couple months now I've said I'm not going to do it on my next day off, but I still do.  My x (who um still friends with) doesn't really care as long as I'm still holding down the job.  I haven't been to a meeting since before I met my x, and I'm considering starting up again.  I just want a trans friendly one.  Any way that's life right now.  I'm just lonely.

Link to comment
  • Admin

@Natalie71645 There are several of us here who know the value and Joy of Sobriety and the help it has given us in navigating the challenges of being Trans.  I have almost 13 years by now and my story is here in this forum going back to 2011 when I joined here.  Another one of our Sobriety Crowd @Charlize is deeply involved in Online AA /*A meetings for Trans people, and over on Face Book I am a moderator for a group there where more local Meetings of Trans people are posted.  Trans meetings may include several addiction types, but that is working out fine wherever I see it.  Doing this Trans stuff without the booze is much easier and more fun.  This is your third post and when you have 5 posts you can use the PM feature if you need one of us to talk to here on the Forums.  Life will be so much nicer no matter your fears not having to make love to the booze.

Link to comment

Natalie, Glad you're here! For me sobriety allowed me to honestly see & accept me for who I am, transgender. Where this journey takes me I don't yet know, but to see & live the femme in me without the fog & depression of alcohol today gives me serenity.

 

Hugs!

Delcina

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

   Alcohol and other substance abuse  is certainly not restricted to the straight cis world. I don't know if that was what led me down a road that left me shaking and hallucinating, needing a drink but finding it no longer helped  with the pain.

I was going to the rooms of AA and was sober for some time before i transitioned.  Today i find comfort, friendship, sobriety  and peace in any meeting i attend. 

   I found the tgaa group which meets now on Zoom 4 nights a week around 9 years ago.  Several other members of Trans Pulse also attend meetings there.  here is a link to a post here that would get you started to joining us there.  We do have a  safe group as far as online security so signing in may be slightly more difficult than some other on line sites. 

    

I just wanted the folks here who have or think they may have a drinking problem that there are at this point 4 transgendered Zoom meetings available. The times are Thursday at 9:00 eastern, Saturday at 6:00 eastern and Monday at 7:00 eastern (now Sunday at 8:00 EST as well). I have found them to be wonderful with the trans* spectrum from all around the word in real time meetings. It is also possible to not turn on a camera if one is worried about privacy.

I am not the only person from Trans Pulse who attends. If going to real life straight meeting is difficult or not, these meetings offer a great alternative. To join us please an e-mail to https://oso-aa.org/mailman/listinfo/tggroup_oso-aa.org . You will be sent links to join us. or PM me here at Trans Pulse and i'll help.

Hope to see you there.

Hugs,

Charlize

 

 

Link to comment

Thank you I'll take a look.  Other issue is I don't have much privacy at home, and I work 3-11 most days, but I'm sure I can make one of them work on one of my days off.  Thank you for the resources.

Link to comment
  • 1 month later...

Hi Natalie (and everyone else): I found the pandemic was becoming a drinking problem for me and through my therapist, I found Moderation Management, a website that has meetings on Zoom, there are specific meetings for all purposes. I recommend you go to the website and find one (or two) that fits your schedule. Just give it a try, maybe it can help without the narrow constraints of AA guilt. Moderation Management is just that, not the strict abstinence AA is based on. They encourage having a plan and provide ways to help you achieve your goals. It is a place to go and express yourself with out judgement. Only supportive peers and it's totally confidential.

Hugs, Wanda 

Link to comment
  • 4 weeks later...
On 6/5/2021 at 9:58 PM, Natalie71645 said:

Hi everyone,

 

Im five and a half months into HRT.  I don't drink every day, but I almost feel like I have a compulsion to every day off from work.  On top of that I do, and think things I would never think sober.  I think of self harming, which is something I had a problem with in the past, but not in years.  Also this past time I smoked which is something else I haven't done in years.  I talk to people online I would never talk to sober.  I even sent a topless picture to someone I didn't know one of these times.  I've had problems with alcohol in the past, like pretty bad.  Some drugs too but mainly alcohol.  I could go into specifics but the point is that between dysphoria, work, kids, and a divorce, life is stressful.  My days off don't feel like days off any more unless I have a bottle of wine after the kids are in bed.  For a couple months now I've said I'm not going to do it on my next day off, but I still do.  My x (who um still friends with) doesn't really care as long as I'm still holding down the job.  I haven't been to a meeting since before I met my x, and I'm considering starting up again.  I just want a trans friendly one.  Any way that's life right now.  I'm just lonely.

Hey, I am working on this too. I had a black out last Saturday (not yesterday but week before) from bourbon. I have dangerous binge drinking episodes and do get into period of daily drinking after work. I have cravings and on stressful days just really need it. Strangely I have been thinking about picking up smoking cigarettes as well but so far have been able to stave that off. I've been having a great time with my local AA meetings. They are very accepting of me, don't care at all that I am trans and tell me to keep coming back. I have sponsor now and she said that while she doesn't understand trans issues very well, she will try. Most people including my sponsor gender me right. I live in a conservative area and I'm one of very few trans people that are out and visible at least, but as I understand it the spirit of AA is to be welcoming and accepting of all people, it is kind of set in the program to help people be more open about things.

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

I'm so glad you shared with us here Rainflower.  I can relate to that craving.  I seems miracle that over time that need has gone away.  Like you i found acceptance and support in AA.  

If you are interested please do join us at TGAA.  We meet on Zoom 4 evenings a week with other AA trans folks from all around the country and world.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

Link to comment
On 8/8/2021 at 1:31 PM, Charlize said:

I'm so glad you shared with us here Rainflower.  I can relate to that craving.  I seems miracle that over time that need has gone away.  Like you i found acceptance and support in AA.  

If you are interested please do join us at TGAA.  We meet on Zoom 4 evenings a week with other AA trans folks from all around the country and world.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

Thanks, I might drop in some time. How do I get the zoom link?

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

To join us please an e-mail to https://oso-aa.org/mailman/listinfo/tggroup_oso-aa.org 

We do have a bit of a sign in process so that we are safe.  Some members are long term stealth while others are exploring their gender feelings.  We all have an issue with alcohol (and substances) as well as gender issues.  TGAA gives us a safe and supportive space.

Hugs,

 

Charlize

Link to comment
10 hours ago, Charlize said:

To join us please an e-mail to https://oso-aa.org/mailman/listinfo/tggroup_oso-aa.org 

We do have a bit of a sign in process so that we are safe.  Some members are long term stealth while others are exploring their gender feelings.  We all have an issue with alcohol (and substances) as well as gender issues.  TGAA gives us a safe and supportive space.

Hugs,

 

Charlize

Ok, I submitted the form on that page.

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Great!  Hope to see you soon.

We have the list serve but ask to join the Zoom meetings and you will get set up.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   2 Members, 0 Anonymous, 133 Guests (See full list)

    • Stefi
    • Pip
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.7k
    • Total Posts
      768.4k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,024
    • Most Online
      8,356

    JamesyGreen
    Newest Member
    JamesyGreen
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Alscully
      Alscully
      (35 years old)
    2. floruisse
      floruisse
      (40 years old)
    3. Jasmine25
      Jasmine25
      (22 years old)
    4. Trev0rK
      Trev0rK
      (26 years old)
  • Posts

    • EasyE
      Republicans have long committed grave errors by emphasizing their social agenda and moral issues instead of just focusing on the economy, lowering taxes, keeping the public safe, building a strong national defense, promoting business, touting reasonable immigration policies, etc.   The country would thrive economically under Trump's tax and business policies. That's a fact. Another four years of Biden will run this country into the ground financially (including all of our 401Ks and IRAs). But the GOP continues to play right into the Dems' hands by leading with their moral crusades instead of staying the course and trusting their fiscal policies to win the day... 
    • Carolyn Marie
      https://www.nbcnews.com/nbc-out/out-news/hundreds-athletes-urge-ncaa-not-ban-trans-athletes-womens-sports-rcna149033     Carolyn Marie
    • KymmieL
      Well first day is over and now getting ready for bed soon. Work was OK.   Don't know why but I am feeling down. I am heading to bed. Good Night.   Kymmie
    • Adrianna Danielle
      Boyfriend and I our time at my place.Both admit our sex life is good,got intimate for the 2nd time and he is good at it
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Thanks.  I will look those up in the document, hopefully tomorrow.   I always look at the source on stuff like this, not what someone, particularly those adversarial, have to say. 
    • MaeBe
      LGBTQ rights Project 2025 takes extreme positions against LGBTQ rights, seeking to eliminate federal protections for queer people and pursue research into conversion therapies in order to encourage gender and sexuality conformity. The policy book also lays out plans to criminalize being transgender and prohibit federal programs from supporting queer people through various policies. The project partnered with anti-LGBTQ groups the Family Policy Alliance, the Center for Family and Human Rights, and the Family Research Council. Project 2025 calls for the next secretary of Health and Human Services to “immediately put an end to the department’s foray into woke transgender activism,” which includes removing terms related to gender and sexual identity from “every federal rule, agency regulation, contract, grant, regulation, and piece of legislation that exists.” The Trump administration proposed a similar idea in 2018 that would have resulted in trans people losing protections under anti-discrimination laws. [Project 2025, Mandate for Leadership, 2023; The New Republic, 2/8/24] Similarly, the policy book calls for HHS to stop all research related to gender identity unless the purpose is conformity to one's sex assigned at birth. The New Republic explains: “That is, research on gender-nonconforming children and teenagers should be funded by the government, but only for the purpose of studying what will make them conform, such as denying them gender-affirming care and instead trying to change their identities through ‘counseling,’ which is a form of conversion therapy.” [The New Republic, 2/8/24] The policy book’s foreword by Kevin Roberts describes “the omnipresent propagation of transgender ideology and sexualization of children” as “pornography” that “should be outlawed,” adding, “The people who produce and distribute it should be imprisoned.” Roberts also says that “educators and public librarians who purvey it should be classed as registered sex offenders. And telecommunications and technology firms that facilitate its spread should be shuttered.” [Project 2025, Mandate for Leadership, 2023] Roberts’ foreword states that “allowing parents or physicians to ‘reassign’ the sex of a minor is child abuse and must end.” Echoing ongoing right-wing attacks on trans athletes, Roberts also claims, “Bureaucrats at the Department of Justice force school districts to undermine girls’ sports and parents’ rights to satisfy transgender extremists.” [Project 2025, Mandate for Leadership, 2023; TIME magazine, 5/16/22] Dame Magazine reports that Project 2025 plans to use the Department of Justice to crack down on states that “do not charge LGBTQ people and their allies with crimes under the pretense that they are breaking federal and state laws against exposing minors to pornography.” [Dame Magazine, 8/14/23] Project 2025 also calls for the Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services to repeat “its 2016 decision that CMS could not issue a National Coverage Determination (NCD) regarding ‘gender reassignment surgery’ for Medicare beneficiaries.” The policy book’s HHS chapter continues: “In doing so, CMS should acknowledge the growing body of evidence that such interventions are dangerous and acknowledge that there is insufficient scientific evidence to support such coverage in state plans.” [Project 2025, Mandate for Leadership, 2023] Going further, Project 2025 also demands that the next GOP administration “reverse policies that allow transgender individuals to serve in the military.” The policy book’s chapter on the Defense Department claims: “Gender dysphoria is incompatible with the demands of military service, and the use of public monies for transgender surgeries … for servicemembers should be ended.” [Project 2025, Mandate for Leadership, 2023]   …summaries of what’s within the rest of the document re: LGBTQ+ concerns. A person can believe their gender is fixed but incongruent with their physiology, but the authors and Trump (by his own words) just see the incongruity of an “expressed gender” that conflicts with what was/is in a person’s pants.
    • Mmindy
      Good catch… I took care of it.
    • Sally Stone
      I'm tired of the two-party system.  It has degraded to a system where there are only two diametrically opposed views, neither of which supports me.  I have conservative views regarding big government and government spending but I have very liberal views when it comes to protecting the rights of individuals.  And just elections of the past, I am stuck with two choices, neither of which I support. With only two parties, each with agendas that are off the left and right scales, I am not adequately represented.    Finally, I'm okay with party affiliated politicians running for office using their party views, but once elected to office, they are obligated to support the entire electorate not just the electorate members that voted for them.  Plain and simple, our government system is broken and dysfunctional.  I'll step down from my soapbox now.     
    • Sally Stone
      Thanks Mae.  She was an amazing friend and I grew to love her like a sister.
    • Sally Stone
      I did Ashley.  Non-rev travel was one of the major factors for taking the job.  At the time, US Airways had the best non-rev policy in the industry.  It cost $10 to fly coach and $25 to fly first class.  We flew first class whenever there were seats available.  
    • Abigail Genevieve
      You should have a moderator fix what you meant to write as "birth certificate".  Ooops.   I've gone over that verse and am wholly and completely dissatisfied with the SBC exegesis of it, so much so that it was one of the things that helped me break out of a mindset of guit.  Sometime I may strut by stuff as a Hebraist and show what it really means.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      I found this   — 450 — Mandate for Leadership: The Conservative Promise Goal #1: Protecting Life, Conscience, and Bodily Integrity. The Secretary should pursue a robust agenda to protect the fundamental right to life, protect con- science rights, and uphold bodily integrity rooted in biological realities, not ideology. From the moment of conception, every human being possesses inherent dignity and worth, and our humanity does not depend on our age, stage of development, race, or abilities. The Secretary must ensure that all HHS programs and activities are rooted in a deep respect for innocent human life from day one until natural death: Abortion and euthanasia are not health care. A robust respect for the sacred rights of conscience, both at HHS and among gov- ernments and institutions funded by it, increases choices for patients and program beneficiaries and furthers pluralism and tolerance. The Secretary must protect Americans’ civil rights by ensuring that HHS programs and activities follow the letter and spirit of religious freedom and conscience-protection laws. Radical actors inside and outside government are promoting harmful identity politics that replaces biological sex with subjective notions of “gender identity” and bases a person’s worth on his or her race, sex, or other identities. This destructive dogma, under the guise of “equity,” threatens American’s fundamental liberties as well as the health and well-being of children and adults alike. The next Secretary must ensure that HHS programs protect children’s minds and bodies and that HHS programs respect parents’ basic right to direct the upbringing, education, and care of their children.   https://static.project2025.org/2025_MandateForLeadership_CHAPTER-14.pdf   First, that is not much, if that is all that is of concern.  Secondly, I have seen all sorts of anti-Trump slander, including the Steele dossier and the lawfare he is now undergoing, to be cynical of any criticism against him, and indirectly this document.    He deserves some of what he is getting, but not all.  Thirdly, I bolded one statement of concern.   I don't think gender identity is subjective.  "Radical actors" is name calling, and there is a lot of that going around.  Maybe I am not seeing everything of concern or reading this right, but i would discuss with the author of this document concerning this.
    • Willow
      Good evening   well I finally finished reading my textbook.  Yeah.  But I still have a lot more to go for the class.     My endocrinologist always asks me about lactation.  And yes I have had some very small amounts of leakage but not on any regular basis.  I figure I blocked the discharge Duce when I pierced my nipples with scare tissue.  But who knows.  I also get asked about mammograms.  I e had my first or baseline and this fall I will need to schedule my second.   As someone in the midst of studying the Old Testament, I can say that I haven’t found any mention of pending damnation for being transgender or intersex.  The closest it comes is a verse that says men should not wear women’s clothing.  Now I don’t know each and everyone’s particulars, but I know I meet the medical definition of female gender, and even in Ohio, a State that until recently refused to allow birth certificates to be changed, I meet the criteria.  Therefore I can only conclude I am not a man wearing women’s clothing.  But there is a somewhat different scholarly explanation of that law that it should not be taken as literally as the haters want.  Mostly men should not pretend to be women to ex ape from their enemies. Or tried to hide from God.     willow
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Well, the left wing has been doing that.    I read a few things while trying to find out what the problem is and liked what I read.  But I am a conservative.    Is there something specific in there that is of concern?  Does it promise somewhere to erase trans folk? That would be problematic.
    • Ivy
      It's a plan to basically completely take over the government by the right wing.
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...