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17 Signs I was Transgender and didn't know it.

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...ah I see BJs auto-corrects/self censors itself to wind chills!


Sounds so cold and frosty..I've never given any of those.😆

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  • Vini


  • swallow


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  • Jackie C.


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18. NSW. You were groomed, pursued , hit on by teachers, priests, brothers, classmates,  co workers, or male friends. You didnt know they were gay or bi or straight, and you never felt like coming on to men, maybe you were just attracted to girls. Maybe they got you on their couch, or bed or office.  But you only felt like they saw you as a female object of affection.  Then in the back of your mind youre thinking, if I was a female, or even had long hair and dressed like a female, maybe you could make love to this person.

19.  Maybe while you were making love to women, not to brag but, they were really enjoying getting oral, being entered, and pumped for as long as you could hold out. And you start wonder what it would be like to be made love to.  How great it would be to just lay back and just take it like a female, not just dress in womens clothes, could I become a female ?

20 And over the years, there was no one you could talk to about it, but it kept popping up in the back of your mind.  You did research when you could, your ears percked up when ever it was mentioned. You started to experiment, you always paid attention to females to discover what you felt like you were missing.

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Jackie C.
13 hours ago, swallow said:

As "the male" I felt the pressure of having to (literally of course) 'Stand and Deliver'😓


Yeah, see I just changed the mission parameters. So long as the target explodes, the, um, missile detonating was secondary to the primary objective.



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Number 18, or variations thereof.


I've always been pretty clueless about such things.  (Truth is I'm very inexperienced in these things)  But I have been told by observers that there have been times I was being hit on by gay guys.  And I do know that some have assumed I was gay at times in my life.  So much so that I wondered about it myself.  But I was never attracted to guys, straight or otherwise.


Having said this, there was one time when I was sleeping in the same bed as a guy I was running with at the time.  This was back in the day*, and neither of us even owned any underwear, so…   In the middle of the night he rolled over and started (in the missionary).  I don't really know why, but I didn't try to stop him, and I did get off on it.  I'm not sure if he was really awake or not - we never talked about it, and it only happened once. I felt like I was a woman while it was happening, and I liked it.


It was not long after that I met my ex and things went in that direction.


Since we split, I can't help but wonder what would have happened if I had realized that being transgender was a thing, and had had the opportunity to explore this.


Having said this, I don't regret having a traditional family.  And they are supportive of me now.  So that has worked out in my favor.


* I was actually still a virgin at the time - I said I'm pretty inexperienced!

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I've always been pretty clueless about such things.  (Truth is I'm very inexperienced in these things)


Based on my past experience, I can honestly tell you that its not the quantity, but rather the quality that counts.  Quality becomes an 'in search of the holy-grail' trying to latch on to anything that has even a remote semblance of emotional feeling attached to it.  Otherwise the experience, like all of those before it, becomes lost within the noise threshold of your memory.  Not even worthy of remembrance.

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Jackie C.
1 hour ago, Nikki-C said:



Based on my past experience, I can honestly tell you that its not the quantity, but rather the quality that counts.  Quality becomes an 'in search of the holy-grail' trying to latch on to anything that has even a remote semblance of emotional feeling attached to it.  Otherwise the experience, like all of those before it, becomes lost within the noise threshold of your memory.  Not even worthy of remembrance.


They need to be less ambiguous though. I mean, wouldn't it be neat if on, say your tenth birthday, the Transgender Flamingo arrived on your doorstep with a bundle of puberty blockers, a pride flag and a festive greeting card?


Composition Notebook: Trans Flamingo Transexual Bird LGBT Transgender Pride  Flag Journal/Notebook Blank Lined Ruled 6x9 100 Pages: Rupp, Ralf:  9781673406535: Amazon.com: Books



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@Jackie C

Aww, that is so cute 🙂



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@Jandi I know what you mean about clueless. Its embarrassing when your Daughter tells you later "Dad, that guy was hitting on you".  And @Jackie C. I wish the flamingo would come when you 14 yo and warn you that people may molest you when you least expect it. And you may have mixed feelings about it.

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@Jackie C. I would trade all past tooth fairies and Santas for one timely Transmingo around age 14!

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Also @Jandi not to belabor the hair topic, but I have heard that older mtf trans have an advantage in hrt transition, since they don't have as far to go compare to cis women of the same age.  Since Menopausal women experience hair growth and hair loss, and other hormonal changes.  So there may be many women out there who are balding on top, and their hairdresssers take care of them with wigs, extensions and or styling.  So you may be just be one of the older girls who are attractive in scarfs, berets and wigs.  My one experimental wig length was very enjoyable flowing around my neck and shoulders as you commented once.

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2 hours ago, Vini said:

So there may be many women out there who are balding on top,

Yeah, this is true.  I saw one at the store not long ago that was about as bad as me.   She just went about her business.  It actually made me feel a little better.  It is true that as we age, cis men and women start looking more and more alike - just old.  That's an advantage us older trans folks don't appreciate nearly enough.

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    • Jandi
      This is possibly my favorite album still.
    • Jandi
      I don't think you're overly sensitive.   I find this kind of thing offensive myself.  But I do realize the people that post it have no concept of actually being transgender.  Of course this doesn't make it less offensive, esspecially when it's done vindictively.   I am not personally a fan of the drag scene.  But whatever.  That's probably because I don't like the idea of drawing attention to myself.     As for "crossdressing"…     It was when I finally got up the nerve to try fem clothes that I busted my egg.  But I don't consider it cross dressing.  To me it's just dressing. But I do realize there are plenty of people who are content with occasional crossdressing.  I'm not offended by that.  Sometimes it's just the situation they are in, or they may be NB.  
    • Cyndee
      For ladies only "Tenderness"   sooo sweet....    
    • Charlize
      Perhaps simply knowing i'm not alone has been as important in finding self acceptance as anything else.  My feelings about gender and how i express it have certainly changed over time.  Some of that was societal pressure while some was simply due to life's pressing needs.  For much too long i felt shame and guilt for being myself.  Acceptance, whether of a distinct straight path or a winding trail, can take away self condemnation.      My life seems to wind and vary in many ways including my gender.  I've been hyper male, quite female and perhaps today i'm a "tomboy".  Truck and tractor driving farmer who puts on a skirt to go grocery shopping.  I just enjoy being me even if that is in flux.     Hugs,   Charlize
    • MetaLicious
      @Willow, I definitely thik the dog thing is offensive.  Not only does it show blatant disrepct for transfolk, there's an unhealthy dose of fat-shaming there as well.   As for female impersonators, drag queens have a disproportionate share of gays and transwomen compared to society, and are more "like us" than you may realize.  Also, I think Ru Paul is a treasure who has shown me how beautiful a man can be feminine even without transitioning.  He gives me hope.  He also has some pretty inspirational music!
    • Teri Anne
      Everyone is looking wonderful in the recent pics.
    • Jandi
      Sounds like a wise man. I'm sorry for you and your family.   It's never easy, even when you are expecting it.
    • Delcina B
      Solly, I'm glad you found the forum. I've found it to be a wonderful place full of caring people who share their experience, give advice & support, & accept me just as I am. I think you will find it so as well. This gender journey isn't a race, so you can take all the time you need, relax & breathe. Where we fit on the gender spectrum is where we find we feel comfortable, some are fluid & don't fix themselves with a specific label. It's all up to you.   Welcome! Delcina
    • Shay
      @Willow those are legitimate gripes and I concur. Wish people would respect others differences and not try to find humor where it's not.
    • Willow
      Good morning everyone.  Rain predicted for here in the top of Virginia today and tomorrow.   I have a question for ya’ll.  I get offended by some things which I feel are taking a shot at us.  For example, a joke on Facebook showed a fat dog and the caption was “I identify as trans slim”.  Or I don’t like female impersonators.  They are nothing like us yet they were allowed to advertise their show on on a transgender only secret website.  Am I overly sensitive?  Is it wrong to feel these sorts of things are offensive to me?  Let me know what you think.   @Elizabeth Star I was a Jack! Now Jill of all trades.  Made furniture, repaired the house and car, replaced a roof, you name it ive probably done it.  But I’m getting older and muscle mass is lessened.  My last project was definitely not up to my standard so I’m done.  Giving my stationery power tools to my son.  Gave away or sold a lot of stuff during our move out.  And will likely have more to deal with after we move in to our new place.  And my eyesight, very frustrating and upsetting when I can’t see clearly.  Nothing is ever at the correct focal distance.     let me know if I’m being overly sensitive with things I think are slaps at us.   Willow  
    • Shay
      @Elizabeth Star now that you have experience how about doing my and Cyndee's doors ?
    • Elizabeth Star
      I would be so mad if I broke a nail working on this stuff. I could hire someone to do the work but since I know what's involved I have trouble trusting other people's quality.
    • TiredAndScared
      Thank you all of course. I will get over it.  It's just that it's still a pain when it happens. That sounds kinda heartless but well....   to be brutally  honest.... that wasn't my dad anymore the last few years. It's his body of course.  But not him.. It was that, with every visit, he was a little bit more gone... So we already kinda said goodbye to him during the last 5 years or so. He could't recognize anyone anymore and couldn't do anything anymore..  For him it's sort of a good thing i guess....  He wouldn't want to be kept alive like this... Most things are already arranged by now... Cards have been picked and texts have been chosen. Dad is brought home in a coffin and ... what is the English term?...  laid out? (that sounds weird google translate) Just he's now presentable for anyone who wants to say goodbye. But it will be a week before he will get cremated. Mom still has her ankle operation going on tomorrow. So i have to get up early to bring her to the hospital.   Today i remembered something my dad thought me while i was a kid... Forgotten it for the longest time but .... He once told me:   "i don't care what you do with your life, be a president or a garbage collector. Just be happy with what you do" Not sure how old i was... somewhere between 10~12 years or something? I should keep that teaching in my life...  I know he mend it for my work career but i should apply it to my whole life...   Anyways,  for now i'm going to chill a bit. Woke up at 04am and with everything that happend i got a bit tired. 
    • Kris-Boston
      Just a link.  But being informed is best and real sources .  Its not an easy read ,for most . I was a  science major .   nejm.org   The New England Journal of Medicine: Research & Review Articles on Disease & Clinical Practice (nejm.org)
    • Bri2020
      Liz you're a jill of all trades it seems! I'm done with that kinda stuff.  I know how to fix most things, but I started pawning tht out to contractors about 7 years ago.  I used my back issues as the excuse but in reality, I just don't want to do all the "fix it up" stuff anymore. (especially after a manicure haha).  I think people have also started changing their expectations of me as well.  People use to come to me for help with all the "manly trades" but no one in the last year has except to borrow a tool or something.  My neighbor didn't even ask for my help building his deck (I've built 20 by now) even though I offered to help back before my transition.  We used to help each other with things like that. It's not like he isn't comfortable with my transition, he and his wife have been amazingly supportive and his Oklahoma courtesies of "Yes Ma'am" never fail to tickle me but he is definitely not going to ask a woman for help with carpentry. haha I find myself slipping into my feminine stereotypes more and more and I like it . 
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