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17 Signs I was Transgender and didn't know it.


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swallow

...ah I see BJs auto-corrects/self censors itself to wind chills!

 

Sounds so cold and frosty..I've never given any of those.😆

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  • Vini

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  • swallow

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  • Jackie C.

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18. NSW. You were groomed, pursued , hit on by teachers, priests, brothers, classmates,  co workers, or male friends. You didnt know they were gay or bi or straight, and you never felt like coming on to men, maybe you were just attracted to girls. Maybe they got you on their couch, or bed or office.  But you only felt like they saw you as a female object of affection.  Then in the back of your mind youre thinking, if I was a female, or even had long hair and dressed like a female, maybe you could make love to this person.

19.  Maybe while you were making love to women, not to brag but, they were really enjoying getting oral, being entered, and pumped for as long as you could hold out. And you start wonder what it would be like to be made love to.  How great it would be to just lay back and just take it like a female, not just dress in womens clothes, could I become a female ?

20 And over the years, there was no one you could talk to about it, but it kept popping up in the back of your mind.  You did research when you could, your ears percked up when ever it was mentioned. You started to experiment, you always paid attention to females to discover what you felt like you were missing.

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Jackie C.
13 hours ago, swallow said:

As "the male" I felt the pressure of having to (literally of course) 'Stand and Deliver'😓

 

Yeah, see I just changed the mission parameters. So long as the target explodes, the, um, missile detonating was secondary to the primary objective.

 

Hugs!

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Number 18, or variations thereof.

 

I've always been pretty clueless about such things.  (Truth is I'm very inexperienced in these things)  But I have been told by observers that there have been times I was being hit on by gay guys.  And I do know that some have assumed I was gay at times in my life.  So much so that I wondered about it myself.  But I was never attracted to guys, straight or otherwise.

 

Having said this, there was one time when I was sleeping in the same bed as a guy I was running with at the time.  This was back in the day*, and neither of us even owned any underwear, so…   In the middle of the night he rolled over and started (in the missionary).  I don't really know why, but I didn't try to stop him, and I did get off on it.  I'm not sure if he was really awake or not - we never talked about it, and it only happened once. I felt like I was a woman while it was happening, and I liked it.

 

It was not long after that I met my ex and things went in that direction.

 

Since we split, I can't help but wonder what would have happened if I had realized that being transgender was a thing, and had had the opportunity to explore this.

 

Having said this, I don't regret having a traditional family.  And they are supportive of me now.  So that has worked out in my favor.

 

* I was actually still a virgin at the time - I said I'm pretty inexperienced!

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Nikki-C

@Jandi

Quote

I've always been pretty clueless about such things.  (Truth is I'm very inexperienced in these things)

 

Based on my past experience, I can honestly tell you that its not the quantity, but rather the quality that counts.  Quality becomes an 'in search of the holy-grail' trying to latch on to anything that has even a remote semblance of emotional feeling attached to it.  Otherwise the experience, like all of those before it, becomes lost within the noise threshold of your memory.  Not even worthy of remembrance.

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Jackie C.
1 hour ago, Nikki-C said:

@Jandi

 

Based on my past experience, I can honestly tell you that its not the quantity, but rather the quality that counts.  Quality becomes an 'in search of the holy-grail' trying to latch on to anything that has even a remote semblance of emotional feeling attached to it.  Otherwise the experience, like all of those before it, becomes lost within the noise threshold of your memory.  Not even worthy of remembrance.

 

They need to be less ambiguous though. I mean, wouldn't it be neat if on, say your tenth birthday, the Transgender Flamingo arrived on your doorstep with a bundle of puberty blockers, a pride flag and a festive greeting card?

 

Composition Notebook: Trans Flamingo Transexual Bird LGBT Transgender Pride  Flag Journal/Notebook Blank Lined Ruled 6x9 100 Pages: Rupp, Ralf:  9781673406535: Amazon.com: Books

 

Hugs!

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Nikki-C

@Jackie C

Aww, that is so cute 🙂

 

 

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@Jandi I know what you mean about clueless. Its embarrassing when your Daughter tells you later "Dad, that guy was hitting on you".  And @Jackie C. I wish the flamingo would come when you 14 yo and warn you that people may molest you when you least expect it. And you may have mixed feelings about it.

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Beatriz

@Jackie C. I would trade all past tooth fairies and Santas for one timely Transmingo around age 14!

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Also @Jandi not to belabor the hair topic, but I have heard that older mtf trans have an advantage in hrt transition, since they don't have as far to go compare to cis women of the same age.  Since Menopausal women experience hair growth and hair loss, and other hormonal changes.  So there may be many women out there who are balding on top, and their hairdresssers take care of them with wigs, extensions and or styling.  So you may be just be one of the older girls who are attractive in scarfs, berets and wigs.  My one experimental wig length was very enjoyable flowing around my neck and shoulders as you commented once.

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2 hours ago, Vini said:

So there may be many women out there who are balding on top,

Yeah, this is true.  I saw one at the store not long ago that was about as bad as me.   She just went about her business.  It actually made me feel a little better.  It is true that as we age, cis men and women start looking more and more alike - just old.  That's an advantage us older trans folks don't appreciate nearly enough.

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    • Shay
      You've come a long way lady..... wish I was as lucky. Hugs, Heather
    • Heather Nicole
      Attempting play the male "pursuer" role in dating. I am sooo just not wired for that.   That, and the time a few years ago when I had to move in with my dad for awhile. Yeech!   Coming out to my mom was actually, I won't say easy, but definitely somewhat less difficult by comparison.
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      Thank you . . . @Jandi @Shay @Astrid @Charlize hugs, Davie
    • Vidanjali
      Quitting heroin and all the ensuing years of getting my ish together. Amazingly, part of my strategy was: grow your hair long, quit wearing men's clothes and shoes, act like a lady, figure out what "being yourself" means, and "fit in". As you can see, some of those goals were contradictory, but I didn't know it at the time. Heroin was my self-medication of choice. Somehow I managed to get through a graduate program in mathematics with no drugs despite dealing with ptsd and psychotic depression. I'm doing MUUUUUCH better now. What's interesting about this question is that I realize in retrospect that some of the hardest things I've forced myself to do have been along the lines of giving up self-destructive behavior. Besides dealing with drug addiction and mental illness, this also includes discovering more truth about who I am and consequently shedding habits, behaviors, and sometimes people that/who were holding me back. Thanks for this thought provoking question @Shay. 
    • Heather Nicole
      Not to discount the existance of male privledges, of course, but personally, I always felt weighed down and held back by maleless, like it's just one giant ball of social restrictions, and also causes people to view me with suspicion by default. Always hated all of that. Envied the heck out of girls for all of that, even with the bad things they're more likely to have to deal with. It's like, "Umm, I volunteer to trade places! Any takers? No?..."   I haven't found too much physical issues with wallet in the back pocket, but that's probably because I have an excess of built-in padding back there, 😋. But lately I've taken to keeping it in front pocket anyway. I figure it's harder to get pickpocketed that way.
    • Benji C
      Update: she replied again a few hours ago and here's what she said... I'm gonna try to do what she said and get into contact with her a little more to see if she knows anything else and can help me more...
    • Lexa83
      Me....everytime it happens lol.... Just this Saturday I broke one trying to one grip the air fryer basket thing while scrubbing it, and it slipped and the pressure went all to my nails. Luckily it didn't break all the way to the bottom so was able to file it down and still have it be almost 1/4" long, visibly shorter than the others, but at least not just a finger nub.
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    • Elizabeth Star
      I’ve circled back to an old outfit. Just thought it would be fun to post a then and now. The first picture is the same one from page 1 of this thread, back in November of ‘20 and the second is today. Same clothes just 9 additional months of HRT.     
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      Forgot one of my favorite ZZ TOP riffs.    
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      Nice dress.   Shoes are a problem.  It's hard to find anything bigger than 12, and even those are rare.  (and usually tight)  
    • Jandi
      Admitting to myself that I had a feminine nature - the heart of a girl.  (I was pretty transphobic)   But right up there with it was taking off my wedding ring, and accepting that it was over.  That night I was suicidal.  
    • KathyLauren
      #1: Admitting to myself that I was trans.  (Took 60+ years.) #2: Telling my wife that I was trans.  (Took 6 months.)
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