Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Dating....


christinakristy2021

Recommended Posts

After I transition from MTF, and I am ready to date, Where is a good place for a transgender woman to meet other people, even if they're a lesbian?

Link to comment

I don't have an answer, but it's a great question. I have the same question out to the Trans coordinator at Fenway Health, in Boston. Haven't heard back yet.

Love to get some good dating advice, or as I've read "friending" even.

-- Davie

Link to comment

The same question comes up constantly for cis-gender folks, and I think the answer is the same.  Pursue your interests, and seek out friends (and more) as they come.  Connect with the local community(ies) that you click with, get out and 'mingle' for lack of a better word. 

 

I know a lot of people who rush around with the goal of 'dating' and that's what they do, go from one short term relationship to another... deluding themselves in the honeymoon phase and then waking up a week.. a month.. 2 months later and breaking it off... rinse and repeat.  My sister is still doing this at 50, and has left a stream of broken hearts/promises along the way.

 

I don't think it's an effective means to the end, and can lead to unnecessary emotional turmoil.  That said, it probably does work out for some... one friend has been dating the same person for going on 5 months now so maybe?

 

Just my humble opinion on the subject...

Link to comment
  • 2 weeks later...

I’ve been trying Tinder just to get my feet wet, but I have my first date lined up for tomorrow. I’m a bit nervous, but I’m trying to keep my expectations low and hoping to just have a decent time. I know Tinder has the reputation for being a pick up site, but I also heard that that’s not as much the case in Asia. Well, we’ll see!

Link to comment

I wish I knew the answer to the dating question.  I have been on several dating apps for a while (as is 2 years or so) and have not had a single date.  The apps have proven themselves to be pretty useless.  

 

 

ain-t-nothing-wrong-with-living-the-single-life-and-we-ve-got-the-memes-to-prove-it-28.jpg

Link to comment

I just join local groups on Fetlife, then go to group lunches and meetups, talk with people, put myself out there. I've had many, many many dates as a result lol. Not really interested in an LTR, though I was going with this one girl for a couple of years, but it ultimately didn't lead anywhere serious. Neither one of us were really what the other one needed in their lives. She was too hostile and sadistic; I was too needy and clingy lol. I ultimately broke it off with her, but it was totally mutual and respectful and we're still good friends to this day...with occasional benefits. ...It's complicated LOL. XD

Met a guy on Fetlife recently that seems into me, but he seems too nervous and flaky.

Gotta be kinda careful, because I got offered a ride home from the bar by this OTHER guy I met who tried to kidnap me before I put my gun to his head and told him to stop the truck. SUPER glad I decided to bring it along. So far that's the only time I've ever had to use it. I almost damn-near decided to try to grab the wheel and crash the truck before opting to try forcing him to pull over instead LOL. ?

If I hadn't brought my gun, that is DEFINITELY the route I would have gone with lmao, and then we could have both ended up getting killed; this way both of us went home safe! ? (Or possibly to jail in his case; I called the cops immediately after to make a report, and I'm sure this probably wasn't his first time and the cops were probably already aware of him lol. Plus I wanted to make sure the cops got the full story from me first in the event the pervert tried to make a phony report against ME to make me out to be some crazy b*itch lol. It's happened to others before; ALWAYS make a report to the cops anytime you have to use any level of force or pose a serious threat to someone in order to defend yourself; don't just assume that because you escaped, the situation is over. ...It's over when monsters like him get put behind bars. ? )

Link to comment

I haven’t ventured forth in actual dating but I joined a bunch of lesbian meetup groups just to connect with community.  I’m not ready for a sexual relationship since I’m pre-op and feel that’s false advertising for a lesbian. Lol.  I’ve met a number of people and can see this working once I’m ready.  

Link to comment

A meet up and this is where I met my partner.Met her at a LGBT meet up,was into my 7th month of my transition 5 years ago and it was love after that.She supported me through my transition.She still supports my decision not to have the grs.Happily married for 3 years now

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   2 Members, 0 Anonymous, 114 Guests (See full list)

    • KathyLauren
    • Miss Cormac
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.5k
    • Total Posts
      767.2k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      11,944
    • Most Online
      8,356

    Melissa_J
    Newest Member
    Melissa_J
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Amyjay
      Amyjay
      (58 years old)
    2. bettyjean
      bettyjean
    3. Breanna
      Breanna
      (52 years old)
    4. Emily Ayla
      Emily Ayla
    5. JET182
      JET182
  • Posts

    • Willow
      Good Friday Morning    I will be spending a good portion of my day at church today.  I don’t know how any of my family would have been with me.  They all passed before I figured myself out.  I often think my mother and sister may have figured it out before I did but maybe it was just my depression that they saw.  I don’t know and never will.  My grandfather Young unconditionally loved me but he passed when I was 9.   Same with my wife’s parents, both gone before.  We’ve never had the greatest relationship with my wife’s brother but we do see them occasionally.  They words and actions aren’t always in sink when it comes to me.   Sour kraut or boil cabbage were never big even with my parents so that was something we were never expected to eat.  Nor was anything with mustard.  My mother hated mustard and it turns my stomach. My wife tried to sneak it into things early in our marriage but I could always tell.  She stopped after a while.   well I wave to go get ready to go to church.  I have a committee meeting at 10 and then we have a Good Friday Service at noon.   Willow
    • Mmindy
      Good morning everyone,   @KymmieLI hope you're misreading your bosses communications. As you say keep plugging a long. Don't give them signs that you're slow quitting, just to collect unemployment.   I have a few things to do business wise, and will be driving to the St. Louis, MO area for two family gatherings.   Have a great day,   Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
    • KymmieL
      Good morning everyone, TGIFF   It seems like I am the one keeping or shop from being the best. According to the boss. I don't know if my days are numbered or not. But anymore I am waiting for the axe to fall. Time will tell.   I keep plugging a long.   Kymmie
    • KymmieL
      In the warmer weather, Mine is hitting the road on the bike. Just me, the bike, and the road. Other is it music or working on one of my many projects.   Kymmie
    • LC
      That is wonderful. Congratulations!
    • Heather Shay
      What is relaxation to you? Nature? Movie? Reading? Cuddling with a pet? Music?
    • Heather Shay
    • Heather Shay
      Having just a normal emotional day.
    • Heather Shay
      AMUSEMENT The feeling when you encounter something silly, ironic, witty, or absurd, which makes you laugh. You have the urge to be playful and share the joke with others. Similar words: Mirth Amusement is the emotional reaction to humor. This can be something that is intended to be humorous, like when someone tells a good joke or when a friend dresses up in a ridiculous costume. But it can also be something that you find funny that was not intended to be humorous, like when you read a sign with a spelling error that turns it into an ironic pun. For millennia, philosophers and scholars have been attempting to explain what exactly it is that makes something funny. This has led to several different theories. Nowadays, the most widely accepted one is the Incongruity Theory, which states that something is amusing if it violates our standards of how things are supposed to be. For example, Charlie Chaplin-style slapstick is funny because it violates our norms of competence and proper conduct, while Monty Python-style absurdity is funny because it violates reason and logic. However, not every standard or norm violation is necessarily funny. Violations can also evoke confusion, indignation, or shock. An important condition for amusement is that there is a certain psychological distance to the violation. One of the ways to achieve this is captured by the statement ‘comedy is tragedy plus time’. A dreadful mistake today may become a funny story a year from now. But it can also be distant in other ways, for instance, because it happened to someone you do not know, or because it happens in fiction instead of in real life. Amusement also needs a safe and relaxed environment: people who are relaxed and among friends are much more likely to feel amused by something. A violation and sufficient psychological distance are the basic ingredients for amusement, but what any one person find funny will depend on their taste and sense of humor. There are dozens of ‘humor genres’, such as observational comedy, deadpan, toilet humor, and black comedy. Amusement is contagious: in groups, people are more prone to be amused and express their amusement more overtly. People are more likely to share amusement when they are with friends or like-minded people. For these reasons, amusement is often considered a social emotion. It encourages people to engage in social interactions and it promotes social bonding. Many people consider amusement to be good for the body and the soul. By the end of the 20th century, humor and laughter were considered important for mental and physical health, even by psychoneuroimmunology researchers who suggested that emotions influenced immunity. This precipitated the ‘humor and health movement’ among health care providers who believed that humor and laughter help speed recovery, including in patients suffering from cancer1). However, the evidence for health benefits of humor and laughter is less conclusive than commonly believed2. Amusement is a frequent target of regulation: we down-regulate it by shifting our attention to avoid inappropriate laughter, or up-regulate it by focusing on a humorous aspect of a negative situation. Interestingly, amusement that is purposefully up-regulated has been found to have the same beneficial physical and psychological effects as the naturally experienced emotion. Amusement has a few clear expressions that emerge depending on the intensity of the emotion. When people are mildly amused, they tend to smile or chuckle. When amusement intensifies, people laugh out loud and tilt or bob their head. The most extreme bouts of amusement may be accompanied by uncontrollable laughter, tears, and rolling on the floor. Most cultures welcome and endorse amusement. Many people even consider a ‘good sense of humor’ as one of the most desirable characteristics in a partner. At the same time, most cultures have (implicit) rules about what is the right time and place for amusement. For example, displays of amusement may be deemed inappropriate in situations that demand seriousness or solemness, such as at work or during religious rituals.
    • Heather Shay
    • Heather Shay
    • Heather Shay
    • April Marie
      Good morning, everyone!!! Two cups of coffee in the books and I am just feeling so wonderful this morning. Not sure why, but I'm happy and smiling.   Enjoy this beautiful day!!!
    • Heather Shay
      A U.S. dollar bill can be folded approximately 4,000 times in the same place before it will tear. -You cannot snore and dream at the same time. -The average person walks the equivalent of three times around the world in a lifetime. -A hippo’s wide open mouth is big enough to fit a 4-foot-tall child in. -Chewing gum while you cut an onion will help keep you from crying.
    • Susan R
      Love it! This is great news. We need more of this to combat the excessive hate-filled rhetoric and misinformation. 👍
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...