How to explain being transgender?

[Ivy]

I strongly suspect DES in my case as well.  My mother had miscarriages before I was born.  One of my sisters died from cancer (lookup DES daughters) and her twin sister had a preemptive hysterectomy.  

 

Regardless of why, I always felt too much like a girl to be a guy.  I worked hard to hide my little secret.  Of course back in the day I had never even heard of transgender.  At one point I seriously wondered if I was gay, and experimented… but meh.  Married a woman, raised kids, the whole thing.  Serious internalized transphobia.  I was in my 60's before I got up the nerve to peek into my closet.  Then the damn dam broke.

 

As for explaining…  If someone seriously asks, I'll tell them my story.  If they figure I'm crazy, that's on them.

[Billie75B]

On ‎9‎/‎22‎/‎2021 at 10:33 AM, Billie75B said:

Vicky 
that a good point and it makes really wonder as my sister was never able to get pregnant so they adopted and she is 11 years older than me so good chance she is a DES daughter as well. 

@VickySGV just an update so I talked to my sister about DES this weekend and to my surprise she had not heard of it nor ever talked to our mom about it. As I explained what research was showing to both son's and daughters she was shocked and said she was going to research it since she was never able to get pregnant and a host of other issues. I also planted the seed that gender dysphoria may also be linked to DES. That way when I am ready to come out to her it may not be such a shock. 

[VickySGV]

5 hours ago, Billie75B said:

I also planted the seed that gender dysphoria may also be linked to DES. That way when I am ready to come out to her it may not be such a shock. 

You have this one going very well, sounds like she may be very supportive in the long run.

[Guest]

On 9/23/2021 at 12:43 PM, Jandi said:

I strongly suspect DES in my case as well.  My mother had miscarriages before I was born.  One of my sisters died from cancer (lookup DES daughters) and her twin sister had a preemptive hysterectomy.  

 

Regardless of why, I always felt too much like a girl to be a guy.  I worked hard to hide my little secret.  Of course back in the day I had never even heard of transgender.  At one point I seriously wondered if I was gay, and experimented… but meh.  Married a woman, raised kids, the whole thing.  Serious internalized transphobia.  I was in my 60's before I got up the nerve to peek into my closet.  Then the damn dam broke.

 

As for explaining…  If someone seriously asks, I'll tell them my story.  If they figure I'm crazy, that's on them.

I too thought I was gay and completely failed at it. I prefer innies; not outies. My ex wife said she wasn’t surprised when I came out to her. I guess this is a “you’re not alone” post.

[Jamie68]

On 9/23/2021 at 1:43 PM, Jandi said:

back in the day I had never even heard of transgender.

I'm in the same boat as you. In 9th grade I didn't even know what gay meant. I had a neighbor girl ask me if I was gay because I just wanted a friend, not sex. I had no idea what she was talking about.

[Guest]

Some of my earliest memories were of my family concerned that I was gay because I was sweet, sensitive, and hugged and kissed everyone. It wasn’t until I started dating that they backed off. 

[Jamie68]

The past wasn't easy at all. I'm finding out the present isn't easy either. The difference is, I feel good about myself now.

I've forgiven the past and looking toward a happier future now.