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The most difficult part of coming out


Sofie

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I’ve dealt with dozens of transgendered patients over decades of a medical career an now in retrospect, as I start my own transition,  I realize that the most difficult part of coming out is coming out to oneself. That part of having to realize that , to some extent, you have been living a lie. That you are not him, you are her. In the last few weeks I have been struggling with that fact. That I have been playing a role, rather than being myself. Looking back I can see that many of the patients I treated also struggled with this idea. Now I realize that I am a strong and beautiful woman and I am ready to tell the world.

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Hi Sofie, I lived the lie for over 60 years; football player in high school; US Army after high school; a 10 year marriage that ended in divorce; a second marriage with wife and two wonderful girls; a job that provided for my family and into retirement. All of that while keeping the woman inside a secret.

 

My wife knows that I have a very strong feminine side and tolerates my long curly hair, shaved body and woman’s cloths which I wear all the time. I live in the fear that if I tell her and my family that I’m trans feminine I’ll be alone. My secret has been buried for so long and with so much effort that it’s very hard to let out.

 

Congratulations on being honest with yourself and moving forward with who you are. I hope to be that brave soon. Life is to short not to be who you are to the world.

 

Good luck and take care.

 

Hugs

 

Sandra

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