Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Issues dating & finding a date?

Emily Michele

Recommended Posts

Has anyone else had issues dating? I’ve been on five dating websites since March and no likes at all. None. (I’m not counting the guys who are in town for a couple days who want a hookup, likely to check off their “-transgender-” checkbox on their dance card…) I am looking for a relationship, not a hookup. Even when I approach people irl I get all variety of turn down. For reference I’m attracted to women and some men… 

Link to comment

I haven't had luck online or anywhere else.


In my heart I want a relationship like you do.  but I'm pretty sure I will need to do hookups or kink groups if I want any play.  I feel a need to be experienced with men, although I'm not attracted to them over women.


I'm not looking for any of this now because I am scheduled for the urgeries that will change me too.  I feel unconnected now, and very much hoping that it will change.  The whole thing is a faith gamble for me.


Good luck in your search.  May a brave unique soul find you, @Emily Michele

Link to comment

@Emily Michele I've heard cis women online complain that female/female dating is rough. Could that be part of it and not your trans-ness? 


As for men... I think a fetish for trans-women is to be expected for a lot of them. Even if they are good and kind and would date us they may need educating. Like, I admit, I have enjoyed adult videos of trans girls from time before my egg cracked, but doing searches for it was depressing in the degradation of the terminology on the women. If you try and google "trans girl p*rn" you get nearly nothing. You have to search for that OTHER *(&^*(^% word that's also slang term for a vehicle transmission...UGGHHH... And then the videos and sites are all "girls with something extra!" and that crap. So dudes are set up for fetishizing.


I don't want seem out of line, but also it might be where you're located. I had a friend who moved to Salt Lake City. A cis woman, not a raving beauty but with a pretty extreme waist to hip ratio. In other words, to be blunt, she had a very big, feminine butt. She couldn't find men seriously interested in dating her because she wasn't LDS and established in the area... But she got offers for hookups constantly and even one guy who wanted to put her on a small "retainer" fee as his booty call/mistress. Maybe something with the culture down there... But I'm probably talking about something I know very little about being an east coaster.


You're certainly not bad looking and you own your style, I admire your sass and charm in your pic! It's not anything that's missing there!!


Link to comment
  • 3 weeks later...

So, a little update… really by chance and the mysteries of the universe I met an amazing woman on a dating site.  I think it is a rarity, yet a possibility… we become closer each day an she loves me for who I am and finds me incredibly attractive.  I had almost given up hope, then she popped into my life. I guess the moral is to not give up hope…

Link to comment

Well we met irl and we absolutely clicked. We are now officially dating! I’m so glad that she popped into my life. Glad I didn’t give up. 

Link to comment
3 hours ago, Emily Michele said:

Well we met irl and we absolutely clicked. We are now officially dating! I’m so glad that she popped into my life. Glad I didn’t give up. 

@Emily MicheleThat is wonderful!!!  I had a feeling you wouldn't be single for long...

Link to comment

look up transgender dating group


Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   3 Members, 0 Anonymous, 38 Guests (See full list)

    • dianeT68
    • DeeDee
    • MomTGDaughter
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
    • Total Posts
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
    • Most Online

    Newest Member
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. jeffi
      (73 years old)
  • Posts

    • tracy_j
      Thank you   Tracy
    • Red_Lauren.
      While I haven't been out of school nearly that long. This spring is 18 years. I come from a town of 1000 people. My class only had like 23 people in it. We are also the last class from the school to graduate as they joined with another school down the road.    Here is where It gets weird. My class was the only one in 70 or so years of them being around. That had the first gay person, and since I've come out of the closet last year. The only trans person. 
    • KymmieL
      I was on Mylan for my last prescription fill. Before that was Alora.  The Mylan was nice and tiny compared to what I have now.   Kymmie
    • Carolyn Marie
      Hear, hear (or is it here, here!)?  @Petra Jane and @Piper do a bang up job, always.   Carolyn Marie
    • Carolyn Marie
      Jeanette, since you are speaking about her in relation to your own experience, it's fine to mention her by name.  @Charlize is, as usual, absolutely correct.   Carolyn Marie
    • Davie
      Agreed. The USA, the UK, and the EU need this, too.
    • Mmindy
      Congratulations @Nimue   Mindy🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
    • Mmindy
      Take your time, and believe that the rewrite is always better, and flows.    Gentle Hugs,   Mindy🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
    • Jeanette West
      Heh! You have that right. I am continually amazed at the instant understanding and patience of people when I point at my throat and shake my head while motioning "I can't speak".   Give me a couple of hours, I'll write up a comprehensive review of my experience at Haben's clinic. I should do this all in MS Word and save them. My previous was lost in the server crash.
    • Mmindy
      I hope you are doing well, and guess you’ll become a quick note writing expert in the coming weeks, as you resist taking while you heal.
    • Nimue
      Thank you for sharing. I couldn't stop after all; I just couldn't hold out very long for similar reasons to those that you shared. So I decided to just be open with my wife and tell her that I have to proceed.   All of this is bewildering to me, since I have been able to plan and control so much of my life up until my dysphoria surfaced. If this were a sporting match, the score is now Dysphoria 10 vs. Nimue 0.   I am mostly content to be losing this battle. However, I am not always so resolute and struggle with moments of panic an doubt, yet these moments do pass and I feel more sure each time.
    • Vidanjali
    • Nimue
      I just got confirmation of being enrolled in Sephora's online "Bold Beauty for the Transgender Community"! I don't have many people I can share this with who might understand how exciting this is for me, so I am celebrating with you! I hope you don't mind.   Happy dance!   Nimue
    • Bri2020
      I couldn't stop if I tried.  My dysphoria had gotten to the point that just the thought of not being able to live as a woman mad me almost suicidal. I hate every "male" aspect of my being so I'm fast tracking full medical transition. My world supports me but it has also cost me my marriage. We tried counseling. She absolutely wants me to transition but couldn't "transition" into a lesbian and the loss of a male partner left a large hole in her emotionally. We realized we both deserve someone whom we are attracted to and is attracted to us.  Still great friends but that was the price of being my authentic self. I'm lucky that she never wanted me to compromise, doing so probably would have killed me slowly. Everyone has their own journey and their own thresholds for what they are willing to do, or need to do in order to survive and live fully.   My advice is simple, if these compromises are tolerable for you and you are mentally OK with them the great.  On the flip side, if they are just an attempt to appease your spouse but they are emotionally painful for you then you need to reevaluate why you are compromising.  I've seen a lot of people compromise their transitional goals out of fear they will lose someone but even then, they don't "fix" the relationship. It just stagnates and resentments occur on both sides. Couples therapy helps you both see where things truly stand and why you are deciding to slow down or why you are being asked to slow down.   I HATE the fact that I've lost my wife, we had an amazing mariage. But we also realised, it wasn't going to survive without resentments. It was out of respect for each other we split. (also why we still love each other and are friends) My life will be harder and sadder without her, but I will also be able to flourish at some point as my authentic self, free to be me without the fear of hurting someone or myself.
    • Erica Gabriel
      I heard this interview this evening on my local public radio station. Warning; this is a very emotional interview in which everyone cries. They are making a tv series on this ministers life. https://www.cpr.org/show-episode/nov-26-2021-transgender-pastor-shares-revelations-in-as-a-woman/
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.


Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules


Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.


Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
  • Create New...