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Issues dating & finding a date?


Emily Michele

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Has anyone else had issues dating? I’ve been on five dating websites since March and no likes at all. None. (I’m not counting the guys who are in town for a couple days who want a hookup, likely to check off their “-transgender-” checkbox on their dance card…) I am looking for a relationship, not a hookup. Even when I approach people irl I get all variety of turn down. For reference I’m attracted to women and some men… 

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I haven't had luck online or anywhere else.

 

In my heart I want a relationship like you do.  but I'm pretty sure I will need to do hookups or kink groups if I want any play.  I feel a need to be experienced with men, although I'm not attracted to them over women.

 

I'm not looking for any of this now because I am scheduled for the urgeries that will change me too.  I feel unconnected now, and very much hoping that it will change.  The whole thing is a faith gamble for me.

 

Good luck in your search.  May a brave unique soul find you, @Emily Michele

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@Emily Michele I've heard cis women online complain that female/female dating is rough. Could that be part of it and not your trans-ness? 

 

As for men... I think a fetish for trans-women is to be expected for a lot of them. Even if they are good and kind and would date us they may need educating. Like, I admit, I have enjoyed adult videos of trans girls from time before my egg cracked, but doing searches for it was depressing in the degradation of the terminology on the women. If you try and google "trans girl p*rn" you get nearly nothing. You have to search for that OTHER *(&^*(^% word that's also slang term for a vehicle transmission...UGGHHH... And then the videos and sites are all "girls with something extra!" and that crap. So dudes are set up for fetishizing.

 

I don't want seem out of line, but also it might be where you're located. I had a friend who moved to Salt Lake City. A cis woman, not a raving beauty but with a pretty extreme waist to hip ratio. In other words, to be blunt, she had a very big, feminine butt. She couldn't find men seriously interested in dating her because she wasn't LDS and established in the area... But she got offers for hookups constantly and even one guy who wanted to put her on a small "retainer" fee as his booty call/mistress. Maybe something with the culture down there... But I'm probably talking about something I know very little about being an east coaster.

 

You're certainly not bad looking and you own your style, I admire your sass and charm in your pic! It's not anything that's missing there!!

 

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