Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Hello, I'm new to this....


Charlotte Ye Ye

Recommended Posts

Hi,  a bit about myself.....I'm 50s, live in the South West of England, and looking to find answers.  I don't recollect any interest in cross dressing until my late 40s, but recently been umming and ahhing about it.  I've spent the last ten years in an increasingly feminine role at home and work, look after kids/animals/housework etc, and girly things have crept in bit by bit.  I now find myself much more comfortable in this role than the typical masculine pub/footie/crude jokes role.  It started with wanting pretty things around, fresh flowers all the time, pastel colours, that sort of thing.  Gradually fancy dress outfits ( love fancy dress parties) became all female costumes, started wearing a (not very masculine) pinny to do the housework, watching romcoms, listening to female singers a lot more(bit of a change from previous - punk/metal !).  Hence the name, I'm very much into 60s French Ye Ye music!  I don't see myself ever wanting to change from being male, it's just the lifestyle of being the "housewife" rather than the traditional mechanic/salesman/accountant type career earner.  I've found myself entertaining the idea of maybe dressing up once in while to do the housework, maybe curl up on the sofa to watch an old film.  I read that most cross dressers started an early age, does this make me unusual?  I'm concerned, and I'm sure this is quite common, about what other people would think if they found out.  To date my only dabble into this has been a pair of panties.  Have thought about maybe finding someone similar to myself to chat to, share this new thinking with, gain a bit of confidence, learn a bit more.  I'm not attached now, live on my own, apart from Scud (the cat), only work part time and have plenty of leisure time to fill.  Maybe I'm just looking for reassurance that I'm not a weirdo!  I like doing girly things, what's wrong with that. Maybe I just need a push in the right direction.  Thanks for reading.

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

@Ye Ye Welcome and I'm glad you came aboard. I think you'll find others with similar backgrounds and age and I don't think it is unusual to start when you did. Whatever and whenever you started your own personal journey and right you experience is natural for you.

Hugs,

Heather

Link to comment

Ye Ye,

 

We are all different despite having so much in common, so it isn't weird at all that you are discovering your feminine side later in life.  Personally, I find it a blessing to have such a strong feminine side.  That side of my personality contributes to my overall personality in a very positive way.  I think it is okay for you to explore the feminine part of your personality.  You can do it at your own pace and in a manner that makes you comfortable. And, you can always chat with us here.  Welcome!

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Gee you reminded me about how much better i felt about housework when i dressed as myself.  I don't think hit is odd that you came to your realization a bit later than i did.  we all have our own paths.   Try to enjoy your journey without guilt.  You are not alone.

Welcome.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

Link to comment

Thanks all for your replies.  I'm nervous about this path, but something inside tells me I'll enjoy this.  You sit down and write something, like my introduction above, and only when you read it back does it really dawn on you. Put my foot in the deep end last night and ordered first item of clothing!  A nightie.  Can't believe I just typed that. A nightie! Thought I'd start off with something discreet that's fairly safe, ie not likely to have anyone knock on the door in the middle of the night.  First small step.  I have absolutely no idea how you measure yourself for a bra.  I'm nervous and anxious, excited, and probably a dozen other emotions.  Be Brave.

Er,  I notice everyone has a female name, and they're all quite feminine. Ye Ye is more a username, I haven't actually got one at the moment, but it's pretty much essential. I don't "feel" like a "Charlotte" or a "Jenny" or any name at the moment, I guess it'll just pop into my head one day.  Amelia is kinda nice but maybe a bit too posh. It may be I'll just go through a list of Ye Ye singers from the 60s, although it's definitely not going to be Brigitte!

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

You can use a User name if that suits you for now.  There's no need to post a name if you don't want.  Yes buying your first item of clothing can be a nervous situation but it will get normal soon enough. Enjoy the ride.

 

Jani

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Take your time - it took me quite a while to finally feel comfortable with a name that called to me. When you do feel good about it we can name your username if you'd like. I started with Shay because that name chased me for years but over time didn't feel quite right. I tried others but Heather finally felt right. I liked it enough to change my name legally. 

Take your time a little at a time. Take a step - see how it feels - if good - try another step - if not - hold on and see what calls you. 

Each of us is different and each of our journeys are different yet many of the steps are the same so feel free to ask whenever you need.

Link to comment

Again, I can't believe I'm typing this, but my nightie is due to arrive today, and I'm excited.

Link to comment

Well, two nights now wearing a nightie.  This probably sounds very newbie to most of you, but I'm just taking first few steps.  Somehow felt very comfortable once I'd got used to the novelty and still feeling a bit weird about it to be honest but it'll grow on me and you've got to start somewhere.  Thanks for all your encouraging messages.  I would like some advice about just how you go about finding out your bra size.

Thanks

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator
5 hours ago, Ye Ye said:

Well, two nights now wearing a nightie.

 

I generally sleep in panties with MAYBE a pajama top if it's cold so yeah, a nightie would be novel. ?

 

Hugs!

Link to comment

Welcome. I hope you enjoy the journey. Like most here, I figured myself out later in life. Name change decision was easy for me. Went from James Michael to Jamie Michelle. Sizing for a bra is difficult at best. I measure 42b the normal way of measuring. I saw a different way of measuring that said I'm a 42aa. I'm actually just barely a 42a. I guess I'm saying trial and error is the best way. Buy inexpensive ones till you figure it out. I have a pretty coffee themed pajama set for cold nights, but mostly weal tee shirt and panties to bed. Every new women's clothing excites me. I do a lot of brousing through women's clothing departments now drooling over stuff I can't afford or wear yet. My wife keeps commenting on how transwomen always seem to wear clothes that are too young for them. Well crap, it's gorgeous stuff. I don't want to wear old lady stuff. I don't feel old.

Jamie.jpg

Link to comment
1 hour ago, Jamie68 said:

My wife keeps commenting on how transwomen always seem to wear clothes that are too young for them. Well crap, it's gorgeous stuff. I don't want to wear old lady stuff. I don't feel old.

LOL.  Yeah, I like the cute stuff too.  

I feel like a teenager on the inside, but reality is something different.

My theory is that it's easier for a trans woman of a certain age to blend in if she dresses her age - like most cis women.

Link to comment

I've sort of reconciled myself to accepting that I like pretty clothes.  I've spent a fair bit of time window shopping online, looking at what might suit me, what might not.  I think I'll start slowly, tops but with jeans, maybe when I'm more comfortable move on to a skirt.  Dresses are some way away, although I'm having difficulty envisaging myself in one.  My name is going to be a tricky one, I've sort of narrowed it down to about 5 - Charlotte (always liked the name), Elizabeth (it's got a lot of possible shortenings so flexible, and my favourite book is Pride & Prejudice), Barbara (the Felicity Kendall connection, for US readers she was an icon in the 70's playing the perfect housewife in 'The Good Life'), Joanne and Lydia (another Pride & Prejudice character but also a connection with my degree subject, Classical History, it was a province in the Persian Empire).  I've had a 'girly' apron or two for some time, always cook or clean in one, people are used to seeing me wearing one, not frilly or anything, but not something you'd often see a man in.  It was my first attempt at trying push my comfort zone.  I've got plenty of fancy dress costume items but not really day to day stuff, and again, friends are used to me wearing female costumes to fancy dress.  I like pastel colours, pale greens and blues, pinks, subtle yellows and beiges, anything in Gingham check, but also black which I guess normally makes an item look a better fit.  I've ordered a necklace, earrings are for sometime in the future.

  

It's kind of a relief to be able to write this stuff, get it out and share, but in an environment where it's accepted and I won't be seen as odd.  It's early days yet but I have a sense of excitement that I've not had in a long time.  It's sort of I want to shout it out from the rooftop, but without anyone hearing unless they're OK to hear it.  Can't really explain it.  It's like waiting for Xmas morning, but it isn't.  When I was waiting for the nightie to arrive I was clock watching ( "Postman's late today, what's happened!"), couldn't wait.

 

Thanks for being here.

X

 

 

Link to comment
1 hour ago, Ye Ye said:

maybe when I'm more comfortable move on to a skirt.  Dresses are some way away, although I'm having difficulty envisaging myself in one

I can't see wearing these in the winter, but it would be nice to dress up for going out to resteraunt or special occasions.

Link to comment
1 hour ago, Jamie68 said:

I can't see wearing these in the winter,

I do it most of the time.  Layers.  Someone gave me some sweatshirt-type fabric and I made some petticoats with it.  And of course leggings are great in cold weather.  (But then, this is NC)

 

1 hour ago, Ye Ye said:

my favourite book is Pride & Prejudice

Yeah.  This was one of those clues that I tried to ignore.

Link to comment

Had my first online shop for clothes.  Nothing complicated yet, just a couple of tops, a bra and a cardigan.  Conscious of hair at the moment, have hairy arms and legs, it's going to be a big deal shaving them, and not just yet, need to get comfortable first before taking big steps.  Any tips on achieving as smooth as possible a face? I'm lucky at my age that wrinkles are very few.

 

 

Link to comment
2 hours ago, Ye Ye said:

  Any tips on achieving as smooth as possible a face? I'm lucky at my age that wrinkles are very few.

 

 

 

Ya know, I think as far as keeping a youthful complexion there are so many products out there and nothing like good ol' fashioned staying properly hydrated, getting enough rest and staying out of the direct sun can account for a lot IMO.

You do want to have some kind of daily facial cleansing routine to remove dead skin and keep the Pretty Skin Cell Making Machine running in peak production.

There is a thing about Vitamin C, I assume it helps metabolise iron, and the blood carries oxygen which all cells need, but I'm no rocket scientist. 

I use retinol wipes at night currently, and they make my face tingly and fruity so it makes me feel like I am proactive but I should probably research before I waste any of my efforts. 

I heard something about cabbage leaves, too offhand but I have a difficult time with keeping fresh produce, so I generally buy frozen and if I lay around with cabbage on my face, my cat will likely become overinterested and hide them throughout the house. 

Link to comment

I just noticed stveee you're in Columbus, Ohio.  I was there in 1997 on holiday, stayed in the Crown Plaza, don't know if it's still there, lovely city.  Had this weird weather thing - one morning not a cloud in sight, 20 minutes later a rainstorm, 20 mins after that not a cloud in sight.

Link to comment
2 hours ago, Ye Ye said:

I just noticed stveee you're in Columbus, Ohio.  I was there in 1997 on holiday, stayed in the Crown Plaza, don't know if it's still there, lovely city.  Had this weird weather thing - one morning not a cloud in sight, 20 minutes later a rainstorm, 20 mins after that not a cloud in sight.

It's doubled in size and population since.

We have a "microclimate" due to the river, surrounding landscape, and the concrete and asphault of cities in general tend to create additional heating. Science!

Link to comment
On 11/14/2021 at 10:27 AM, Ye Ye said:

I just noticed stveee you're in Columbus, Ohio.  I was there in 1997 on holiday, stayed in the Crown Plaza, don't know if it's still there, lovely city.  Had this weird weather thing - one morning not a cloud in sight, 20 minutes later a rainstorm, 20 mins after that not a cloud in sight.

 

That's Ohio! "If you don't like the weather here, just wait a minute." It isn't always that wild here, of course, but it does happen often enough.

 

A little further north from Columbus, up here where I am in the northern end of the state, we're one of only a handful of places in the world that gets "lake-effect" precipitation. It causes a few areas around here to often resemble northern Canada in the winter, and it also contributes to our weather being notoriously hard to predict. We're accustomed to our weather reports being more of a "maybe" than anything to rely too heavily upon!

 

Back to the topic though, finally getting and wearing the types of clothes you really like is a very nice thing, isn't it! I'm a nightie fan, too. I used to hate sleeping in anything other than underpants, but now my nighties are my favorite way to go. (Erm...when used in addition to underpants, that is!) They just feel so comfy and right ?

 

First nightie I ever ordered I wasn't happy with, though. It looked ok in the pictures, but when I got it, the decorative parts just seemed comically oversized and overall it felt like wearing a plastic garbage bag. Not my best choice. But I'm glad I didn't give up too quickly. The next nightie I bought I was much, much happier with.

Link to comment

Heather Nicole, nightie has turned out fine, though one of the tops turned out too small, the other too loose despite being same size!  I was aware that different manufacturers make their own sizes, it's a trial and error process.  I've got to be careful here, clothes shopping could become quite time consuming, it's like looking in the toy shop window as a child.  I seem to have a tendency to look at very 'girly' stuff, pinks, frills, lace, silk, then settle for something slightly less girly, perhaps I'm still trying to come to terms with this, almost a feeling of guilt, it'll pass, I know, but I'm very new to this and feeling my way.  Bought a really nice denim skirt with a pink heart on the pocket, hope it fits, and a red polker dot dressing gown.  I think I'm going to avoid dresses for at least the foreseeable future, I'm tall and they just don't seem like they'd fit well.  Skirts I think, especially long flowing ones.  I know, before anyone says it, this all sounds very Little House on the Prairie, but so what.  Pretty is how you perceive it, and to me it's that image, you know, woman with long hair running through field of long grass type of thing, advertising some long ago chocolate bar. I'm not going to apologise for being a sentimental chocolate box image type, I'll develop my taste over time and settle into what I like but feel comfortable with.  Almost bought a cute pinafore on ebay, old fashioned type, button at back of neck, below knee length (not sure what they're called in US), but the bidding went too high, and I felt a sense of loss at not having won it.

 

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   0 Members, 0 Anonymous, 141 Guests (See full list)

    • There are no registered users currently online
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.6k
    • Total Posts
      768.2k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,020
    • Most Online
      8,356

    Tami
    Newest Member
    Tami
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Bebhar
      Bebhar
      (41 years old)
    2. caelensmom
      caelensmom
      (40 years old)
    3. Jani
      Jani
      (70 years old)
    4. Jessicapitts
      Jessicapitts
      (37 years old)
    5. klb046
      klb046
      (30 years old)
  • Posts

    • VickySGV
      We have had some real dillies come out as the initiative sort of thing, but as @Carolyn Marie said, very few make it out of the petition signing seasons.  I am not surprised at the origin site of this thing, it is probably one of only 3 regressive leaning counties we have in the state. We actually had one of these initiatives started to make it mandatory for police to shoot dead on site any Gay behaving individuals wherever they found them.  For the most part the matters are poorly written in ways to be unenforceable even if enacted.  Thus most never become law or get to the voters.
    • Carolyn Marie
      You make some good points, AYS.  But there are usually already too many ballot propositions each election, so the proponents know it's best to wrap it all up into a nice package.  Plus, it's easier for the signature gatherers.  Otherwise they have to have a separate clipboard for each proposition.  Too much paperwork, dontcha know?   This kind of proposition is a loser in CA, so the only possible way the proponents can succeed is to give it the scariest title imaginable and try to put one over on the voters before they get wise.  Bottom line; an ice cube on a hot summer sidewalk has a better chance of success.   Carolyn Marie
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      Reading that article, it seems like the attorney general gets to call it whatever unless its an outright lie.  Given the nature of politics in CA, it seems like one side has the bully pulpit for sure.  Labeling it "Restricts Rights" vs "Protects Kids" is very much a matter of perspective.  Unfortunately, that matters since many voters don't bother to read.  Perhaps a better (unbiased) way to handle it would be to simply give the ballot measure a number with no title, forcing folks to read it.    I think it would have been better to handle the various issues covered by the ballot measure separately, rather than all at once.  For example, issues relating to disclosure of medical and social information to parents.  That could be its own ballot measure, rather than lumped in with everything else.  Besides, shorter and more succinct measures are more likely to be read completely. 
    • Carolyn Marie
      https://calmatters.org/education/k-12-education/2024/04/trans-youth/     Yup, the existing title sound perfectly appropriate and accurate to me, too.   Carolyn Marie
    • Adrianna Danielle
      Seen my hrt specialist this morning and nothing but good news,estrogen levels looked good.Boyfriend was with me and I admit he has been learning well about my transition showing his support.Our relationship is going great and we both see each other much happier now.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      This reminded me of an individual who, due to child sexual abuse, lived as a woman for 15 years, detransitioned and noisily insists that all trans people have his story.  His name comes up fairly often because it fits the narrative.   I don't know that anyone actually has been railroaded.  People may say it, they may look back at what happened and decide that happened.  It's a he said / she said, but it feeds a narrative that is useful for those who are already convinced that trans people are abuse victims first and foremost.  That the detransition rate is so low tells me that railroading is not actually a problem, and I regret giving the impression that I thought it was.  That so few detransition is a success story.   What is pertitent at heart is that people hear and believe all the stories out there, and the story we have to tell is not heard, because TG folk are, after all, untrustworthy in their view and unworthy of an audience.  Somehow it needs to get out there as to what the real situation is. 
    • Ashley0616
    • Ashley0616
      I'm not saying that Christianity is wrong but at the same time there were more than 30,000 changes to it. The Bible doesn't state anything against transgender. The only point that can be proven by them is that people are giving into their desire. 1 John 2:15-17 ESV "Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world—the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride of life—is not from the Father but is from the world. And the world is passing away along with its desires, but whoever does the will of God abides forever." I would love to challenge them by asking who watches a movie, reads books, and listens to music that isn't Christian based because then they would be guilty as well. 1 Corinthians 10:31 ESV "So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God. Probably not a single hand would still stand that they don't participate in everything they do gives glory to God. "
    • VickySGV
      My neighboring state got lucky a couple years ago. 
    • VickySGV
      https://www.wpath.org/soc8   I had been looking for this to respond to a member and could not find it .  Pinning it for now.
    • VickySGV
      @Abigail GenevieveSomewhere in the Forums here, we have a link to the World Professional Association for Transgender Health's Standards Of Care, now at revision 8 but it is available in plenty of places.   https://www.wpath.org/soc8.    These are the canons for the allied medical fields that deal with Trans people and are the guidance for those professionals.  I personally know members of the Association and have toyed with the idea of becoming an associate member since I am not a medical professional but because I like to keep on top of what is going on medically.  There are a number of Trans people who think they are overly oppressive as far as the gatekeeping goes, but the medical / psychological profession members who follow these guidelines for there patients WILL NOT be forcing their patients into unneeded or harmful surgery or medications.  I read my first pitiful and heart-rending  "detransitioning" story 60 years ago when I snuck a tabloid newspaper behind a comic book down at the neighborhood convenience store when I was 16 years old and reading it off the rack which should have been adult only.  I am afraid that it was the first thing I ever read that told me about Trans and Transsexual people, it would be another 30 years before I actually figured out my own story.  The story I later found out, was NOT written by a Trans person, but a well known Porn scribbler who wrote many fantastic and gory stories about what he thought Trans people were.  We are not anything like his imagination, but he was a "press agent" for Trans people of the time.  We do have some well known and noisy, negative view Detransitioners who have been found to have gone to multiple psychologists and lied their way Transitioning, one of the most infamous actually hid Dissociative Identity Disorder, right therapist wrong Identity that was being counseled.  It is a messy story.  The public, like my first encounter, was NOT getting their information from the scientific journals of the time, they were getting it from Adult Entertainment and Tabloids   We need to be careful of where we get some of our ideas from. Evidence is good that the person at the heart of this thread gets most of his information from us from the slanted and non-scientific sources most people get theirs.   OOPs, I( may have sent this off track here, but but but.    
    • Ivy
    • Ashley0616
      Yet another failed attempt. Glad to know that we are more important than education or health care to them.
    • Mmindy
      I agree with you.   Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
    • Mmindy
      Well said, and I agree @VickySGV   Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...