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changes?


swallow

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Hi everyone!

 

Hope y'all are doing swell.

 

Come Friday will be my First month on HRT!🤗

 

I'm not sure if I feel very much different or see any changes.🤔

 

I think maybe a bit more fat on my bum?

 

But I dunno...it doesn't look terribly different...maybe I'm on Placebo?🤨

 

All I am worried about though is going to the doctor in Friday and them telling me I've gained weight.

 

I don't believe I have but I have been hungrier of late (although could be just that its getting kinda cold or I'm getting colder or something)🥶

 

Certainly in the nipple department, things look fairly similar. 🤫

 

Well, I guess I'll wait to see what the doctor says in 3 days.

 

I'm still getting 'misgendered' (I mean in a good way like seen as female) in public settings which I guess is good.

 

The rather stern no nonsense lady at the AAA clocked me as a 'Miss' as did a Gentleman in the self check out Aisle of the Supermarket recently who graciously let me go ahead of him bc he said I had my hands full ( 4 items bless him)☺️

 

And the male drivers still stop for me to let me go first now and again.

 

But I'm not sure how my 'Non Strangers' feel about me.

 

I had a picture taken recently with me in a tight crop top and (quite obvious) breast shape (BC of the Bra underneath mostly) and posted it on my Instagram. My mom who is turning 80 in 4 months seems to have liked the picture... I think maybe her eyesight is failing.🙄

 

Of course deep inside I was hoping she knows and has given me a pass.😌

 

On Bras, I think the social media is also coming on to me bc I have started to get a slew of advertisements on my Facebook for Bras...

 

And not just Bras but Bras for small chested women AAA size, created by small chested women bless them.🤭

 

How ever did they know?

 

Anyway hoping this is all part of the normalcy of low dosage transition. No mood sings or hot flashes thank god!😅

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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I kept waiting for some kind of change simply slap me.  I think what helped me the most was thinking about how long it takes a girl to develop.  Over time others noticed the changes more than i do.  While i'm glad you are seeing your doctor soon i wouldn't worry too much especially if you are already passing.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

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Many thanks Charlize.

 

Because, any perception of physical change or evidence that I am passing does help.

 

After all, I am the one that needs convincing the most.🙄

 

I sat down today and felt I was a bit more 'haunchy' (not sure if this is a word). Looked at myself in the bathroom before a shower and feel like I'm getting ever so slightly more thick around the upper thighs/hips.🤔

 

It's spurring me to take other steps.

 

Already I am using my 'girl' voice a bit more albeit still bashfully and intermittently.

 

I'm thinking of doing the electrolysis next. I don't have much facial hair frankly so hopefully it won't cost. My sister is mulling gifting it to me as a Christmas Present...she had her own experience with this (I never knew women did this too)😊

 

Will ask the clinic for a recommendation. They said they were gonna recommend me a voice coach as well (hopefully covered by insurance)

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We for sure notice changes in our selfs last, and it's because we see our selfs everyday, and see our bodies naked everyday, so we don't really see the changes. Till people keep pointing it out, our clothes don't fit, or we look at old pictures. 

 

The lady that dose my brows, and hair. I only see her about once a month, and last time I saw her. She looked at me, and was amazed how hormones have changed just not my body, but my face also. She was like everytime I see you. You are looking more and more feminine. My boss at my other job has also been saying that a lot also, and she sees me daily. Apprently I've been getting a butt. As she has been saying it for a few months now. I didn't believe her. Till I went to throw on a pair of jeans. Yea by butt has grown. 

 

In the end. We are the last to notice changes. If you really are experiencing chnages at one month. Congrats to you. I didn't notice small changes till about 3 months in. Since June I've seen the most rapid, and more physical changes at a rapid pace. 

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Hi there @swallow, congratulations on your one month HRT anniversary the other day! Like you, I was (and still am!) very tuned in to anything that might be related to taking it. I am happy to read about the little joys you are experiencing already! If you are interested, I posted about a week ago about my experiences so far on oral estradiol in another thread on the forums.

 

I joke to myself sometimes that one of the most obvious milestones in my transition is when my web browser cookies flagged me as female and reflected that in the ads I would see. 😇

 

Love,

~Audrey.

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  • Forum Moderator
On 11/30/2021 at 10:08 PM, swallow said:

Come Friday will be my First month on HRT!

Congrats on this milestone, @swallow  I remember how important that 1 month on HRT was for me too. You’re going to be experiencing so many more. This is a quite the magical time for you. It sounds like there’s a lot of very good things happening in your life as a result of the changes emotionally and physically. I am very happy for you.

 

My Best,

Susan R🌷

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And probably the most profound change:

 

Several studies have found that hormone therapy in transgender women causes the structure of the brain to change in the direction of female proportions.[308][309][310][311][312] In addition, studies have found that hormone therapy in transgender women causes performance in cognitive tasks, including visuospatial, verbal memory, and verbal fluency, to shift in a more female direction.[308][305]

 

(from Feminizing Hormone Therapy Wiki)

 

 

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You’ll know it’s kicking in when you start crying and laughing at the same time. We get so caught up in the physical but it’s so much more than that. I often wonder if or when our pheromones change. 

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7 hours ago, Erica Gabriel said:

I often wonder if or when our pheromones change. 

I wondered about this one too. I am quite sure that I smell different in general, and it is most noticeable if I have been sweating. I do not know much about how pheromones work, but it seems plausible that estrogen is working some magic that I cannot see. As I reflect on this drinking my coffee, I am struck by the contrast between feeling almost invisible to the world before, almost like a ghost, to now where the amount of eye contact I get tells me that I am most definitely visible. A presence, if you will. Many of these people looking are (cisgender) men. Are pheromones part of this? All that said, I am learning to be more comfortable with the idea of being seen as attractive, because for so many years, I constantly told myself that I was unattractive and acted as such.

 

Love,

~Audrey.

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40 minutes ago, Audrey said:

I wondered about this one too. I am quite sure that I smell different in general, and it is most noticeable if I have been sweating. I do not know much about how pheromones work, but it seems plausible that estrogen is working some magic that I cannot see. As I reflect on this drinking my coffee, I am struck by the contrast between feeling almost invisible to the world before, almost like a ghost, to now where the amount of eye contact I get tells me that I am most definitely visible. A presence, if you will. Many of these people looking are (cisgender) men. Are pheromones part of this? All that said, I am learning to be more comfortable with the idea of being seen as attractive, because for so many years, I constantly told myself that I was unattractive and acted as such.

 

Love,

~Audrey.

In her first book, She’s Not There, Jennifer Finney Boylan wrote that there was a day when she was at a bar with her friend, Russo, wearing just jeans and a t-shirt. No makeup or jewelry. She became aware that she had reached another unforeseen milestone in her transition when the waitress referred to her as “ma’am” (I’m just paraphrasing this from memory) despite having put little effort into lookin feminine.

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Swallow,

The advertising follows you wherever you go on the internet. Google for instance, and likely others, use deep packet technology and pretty much scan email and other correspondence for any potential information that can be used for marketing. The only way to end that is to dump your cookies frequently. Private industry collects more private information on us than any government would hope to collect. Databases are an amazing thing. If the average person realized how much private information is not private on the internet...Despite all of the proclamations of how much these companies say they protect our privacy, they usually bury their disclaimers in so many confusing notices or pop-ups that you never read the stuff. Some websites are great about truly not collecting cookies, but many do anyway, including Google. Despite Apple's proclamations about privacy, I suspect they do it to some extent as well.

 

Congratulations on the HRT. I hope you have a great time on the path. The question of brain changes has been debated in the past. Some research a while ago looked at the brain structures of transgender MTF in comparison brains and there was a consideration that we already had some defining characteristics in common with cisgender female brains. I will check some databases I have and see if I can pull some more information. It is very likely we will have some brain related changes as a result of changing hormonal teams so to speak. 

 

Boylan's book is a great read. I read that book and I saw so many similarities. It drove home some things I had not thought about over the years. There is another book that is interesting to read called It Never Goes Away by Anne Koch. That was another book that drove home the journey we face, as well as how, no matter what we do, we are who we are. I will have to take note of the smell thing when I get to that point. I am in my first month of HRT as well. I had a hankering for a salad the other night...nah, probably not the estradiol. This is going to be a fun journey. I had a cousin tell me that I should pray these feelings away. With that thought, the day is afoot!

Sincerely

Katie

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1 hour ago, Katie23 said:

I had a hankering for a salad the other night...nah, probably not the estradiol.

Heh heh.   I've developed a taste for White Claws and less IPAs these days.  

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On 12/1/2021 at 12:08 AM, swallow said:

Hi everyone!

 

Hope y'all are doing swell.

 

Come Friday will be my First month on HRT!🤗

 

I'm not sure if I feel very much different or see any changes.🤔

 

I think maybe a bit more fat on my bum?

 

But I dunno...it doesn't look terribly different...maybe I'm on Placebo?🤨

 

All I am worried about though is going to the doctor in Friday and them telling me I've gained weight.

 

I don't believe I have but I have been hungrier of late (although could be just that its getting kinda cold or I'm getting colder or something)🥶

 

Certainly in the nipple department, things look fairly similar. 🤫

 

Well, I guess I'll wait to see what the doctor says in 3 days.

 

I'm still getting 'misgendered' (I mean in a good way like seen as female) in public settings which I guess is good.

 

The rather stern no nonsense lady at the AAA clocked me as a 'Miss' as did a Gentleman in the self check out Aisle of the Supermarket recently who graciously let me go ahead of him bc he said I had my hands full ( 4 items bless him)☺️

 

And the male drivers still stop for me to let me go first now and again.

 

But I'm not sure how my 'Non Strangers' feel about me.

 

 

On Bras, I think the social media is also coming on to me bc I have started to get a slew of advertisements on my Facebook for Bras...

 

And not just Bras but Bras for small chested women AAA size, created by small chested women bless them.🤭

 

How ever did they know?

 

Anyway hoping this is all part of the normalcy of low dosage transition. No mood sings or hot flashes thank god!😅

 

Sorry I'm late to the party, Happy Anniversary!

 

It's amazing how all the ads suddenly change. Within a matter of hours after updating my profile on fb I was getting ads for Midol and "toys". It's like they were waiting to pounce as soon as they got the green light. I was feeling like slow down there buddy, I'm not ready for all that. Most of the adds I get now are for clothes and of course bras.

 

I was worried about weight gain being a problem since I was eating anything I could find for the first year. I had to remember that my body is not only trying to deposit fat in the right places but also burn it off in others. When people wold say something about how much I was eating I just told them my little fat moving forklifts need fuel. Now after two years my weight has only changes a couple pounds but clothes fit totally different. I tried on a pair of old jeans for fun and there was no way I could get them over my butt.

 

On the boob thing. A lot of people, including myself, got the ouchies. You'll think they're little itchy and sensitive until you catch one of the girls on the refrigerator door or in my case a wayward elbow from my supervisor. I wasn't out at work at the time and it almost dropped me to my knees.

 

My interactions with people is definitely a lot different.  Women tend to give a friendly smile when I pass them. Even with a mask on I can still see it. I smile back. Men are a lot more friendly and helpful. Holding doors (still getting used to that) and letting me go ahead of them in line.

 

IMHO you're progressing pretty good for being a little over a month in.

 

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  • 3 weeks later...

Hi,

 

So many wonderful responses and experiences shared. Many thanks everyone!

 

I've been SOOOOOO busy I have not had time to do anything but work since my last post.

 

Wishing everyone SEASONS GREETINGS and HAPPY NEW YEAR!

 

Katie 23 -great to find a fellow traveller at the same stage of the journey as myself. 😊

 

and everyone thanks for the book recommendations.

 

I have not had much time to notice changes last couple of weeks but I caught up with an old producer friend of mine (from school days) and his new (well not that new I've just never met her) wife.😬

 

He said he noticed I look different so I quibbed I was getting older perhaps.🤭

 

I think he's trying to make sense of it (having botched one of our friend's coming out (as Bisexual) some time back. He gave me a strange book for Xmas, it's (one of) his favorite artist, a Pseudo-Hermaphrodite.🤔

 

but in any case, I have been feeling at times slightly itchy and at times slighty achy around my nipples (The left one feels a little harder than usual). I'm not sure if this is part of the course of changes.

 

Unfortunately because of work, I've kept my voice for convenience till the gig ends next month.

 

Today I went to get some food from a take out. I ordered my food and went back to the car where my son was waiting. I notice the man inside was staring out at me.🙄

 

He did not react when I was in the store when I was ordering the food but as soon as I left, it was all eyes on me.

 

I guess one has to get use to being somewhat of a curiosity for people.😏

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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18 minutes ago, swallow said:

I guess one has to get use to being somewhat of a curiosity for people.😏

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Yea my female friends call me their Amazon. Being 6ft tall, and after a year of hormones, and leaving heavy manual labor. I don't quite look like a former linebacker, but im still big. The funny thing is I visually, and vocally pass even up close. Apparently people aren't use to seeing a confident 6ft woman, so I understand when people are curious about you. 

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I see big and tall women everywhere...(maybe its my hood)🤔

 

I was a bit self conscious when shopping for shoes but noticed other women perusing the same aisle (The size 10s)

 

Nobody pays me mind until I open my mouth and bust the image.

 

But people seem nice enough even so, like today at the self check out of the supermarket, I get 'Hon' all the time because I generally think I look kinda lost and in need of some kind of help....and I'm not even at old age yet.😬

 

At this point I'm more concern about my aging brain than a change of brain structure....took me a while to remember my password yesterday and I still forgot it again today.


At work I'm determined to keep up with the other (VERY HIGHLY ORGANIZED SUPER MULTITASKING) ladies in the team...but my brain is such a mush sometimes.😧

 

I read somewhere that being on hormones may effect brain function/memory...goodness.😶

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Hey

So sorry very late to the party.

But I'm on my 4yr on HRT.

I start notice change by the 6 month.

However, I am bald and need to wear a wigs (and not the expensive one either) which triggers my Dysphoria like really bad, 

However, i hardly wear make -up any more cause my face and body look very Fm

Good Luck

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I guess I am lucky in a way. I am not sure my testosterone has been working all that well prior to HRT starting a month ago. I had already noticed being softer, and a bit more emotional at time (tears during a tear jerker type stuff). I was shocked when I found out my T level was normal. I think I may have some androgen insensitivity though. Anyway, my skin has responded rapidly. I am really happy with the results. Now some of it may be the low carb/intermittent fasting that I am doing as well, but between everything including the IPL device, my legs are really feeling great. The change in my skin texture is also very welcome. I could no be happier with the progress.

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hi,

 

I can't say I feel very different...itch and like soreness around nipples aside🥴

 

OTOH I feel like I have become more acutely aware of women scoping me out.🤔

 

Just notice the secretive and not so secretive glances so much more.

 

The other day I went to drop off cookies to my manager. On the way back into my apartment, I had to walk by a woman waiting on her dog by the curb.

 

As I walked toward the entrance, I caught the reflection from the glass on the door of her literally boring into my back with her yes from behind. She stared for a good few minutes as I then struggled to get the door open as I usually do.🧐

 

It go me wondering if I had some sort of wardrobe malfunction perhaps...🙄

 

Next day I got into my leggings (for the first time in a while)

 

I noticed I filled it out much better.🤗

 

Today as I walked to the store for a quick raid, the sun was behind me and I noticed from my shadow I was jiggling a little on the thighs when walking.

 

I'm not sure about touch because I've always been ultra sensitive to touch. My skin has always been hairless and smooth.

 

But I do have an increase yearning to be touched by someone except it's only made me feel even more wishful that my partner was still around.

 

It could be my imagination but I think I'm also more acutely aware of my scent? Been having to sleep on my couch because my daughter is back from college (now remote bc of covid up tick) and on remote learning at home. Its been rather cold so I use my thin top Indian cotton shirt to cover gaps in the comforter.

 

I've always complained about our communal laundry and how I never felt my laundry smelt clean enough but I've been noticing a mild sweet scent from my cotton shirt.☺️

 

Its hard to tell because I generally don't smell much in the armpits although oddly I tend to perspire there when wearing tank tops and driving only.🤔

 

I've also felt a lot colder than I normally do this winter but then some others have also complained about the temperature.

 

It's too early to tell if these are signs of changes or just in my head...?

 

 

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21 hours ago, swallow said:

hi,

 

I can't say I feel very different...itch and like soreness around nipples aside🥴

 

OTOH I feel like I have become more acutely aware of women scoping me out.🤔

 

Just notice the secretive and not so secretive glances so much more.

 

The other day I went to drop off cookies to my manager. On the way back into my apartment, I had to walk by a woman waiting on her dog by the curb.

 

As I walked toward the entrance, I caught the reflection from the glass on the door of her literally boring into my back with her yes from behind. She stared for a good few minutes as I then struggled to get the door open as I usually do.🧐

 

It go me wondering if I had some sort of wardrobe malfunction perhaps...🙄

 

Next day I got into my leggings (for the first time in a while)

 

I noticed I filled it out much better.🤗

 

Today as I walked to the store for a quick raid, the sun was behind me and I noticed from my shadow I was jiggling a little on the thighs when walking.

 

I'm not sure about touch because I've always been ultra sensitive to touch. My skin has always been hairless and smooth.

 

But I do have an increase yearning to be touched by someone except it's only made me feel even more wishful that my partner was still around.

 

It could be my imagination but I think I'm also more acutely aware of my scent? Been having to sleep on my couch because my daughter is back from college (now remote bc of covid up tick) and on remote learning at home. Its been rather cold so I use my thin top Indian cotton shirt to cover gaps in the comforter.

 

I've always complained about our communal laundry and how I never felt my laundry smelt clean enough but I've been noticing a mild sweet scent from my cotton shirt.☺️

 

Its hard to tell because I generally don't smell much in the armpits although oddly I tend to perspire there when wearing tank tops and driving only.🤔

 

I've also felt a lot colder than I normally do this winter but then some others have also complained about the temperature.

 

It's too early to tell if these are signs of changes or just in my head...?

 

 

Woman will notice everything about you. From top to bottom, and good or bad. I swear they notice a lot more then men do. I've actually had woman jealous of my breast. Heck my boss is, and she's like family to me. 

 

A few months ago. I was walking over the the grocery store to get lunch. As I was walking. There is a wall of glass on my right. I check out my reflection as I walk, and noticed my butt was a lot more round then it ever was before. 

 

As the for cold. Yea it was -30 with a wind chill here today. I miss being my own furnace. 

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Hi Lauren,

 

I check myself in every possible reflection all the time!

 

At first I felt I was being vain but then I realise it was also an issue with insecurity that something may not be on point with my clothing. 🙄

 

...which is prob why like a good spy from a John le Carre Novel, I caught sight of that woman giving me the twice over.🕵️‍♀️

 

I thought it could be my attire but I was wearing an unseasonal loose cotton paperbag waist trouser (It was laundry day...the cold was zipping right thru them)🥶

 

Small price to pay for no issues with VPL I suppose(which I normally have)

 

I've yet to get myself sorted with my leggings. I usually wear one of those black high waist control panties. I try to bunch it up a bit at the back to avoid the VPL but inevitably it prefers to slip back down.🤨

 

Still not as bad when I was wearing them and did not notice the marks on the knees.🤔

 

I like to get on my knees to write at my low Japanese table...but once I turned up to turn some work in with marks on my leggings and some of the crew asked me if I enjoy working on my knees which I replied "of course yes, I'm on my hands and knees all the time"...until later someone explained there was another connotation to such a question, which explain the mirth and merriment earlier (clearly at my expense).😳

 

So I have adjusted that behaviour accordingly.😌

 

This week, I feel as if (again could be wishful thinking) my eye lashes are longer than before.🤗

 

I fluttered them in the mirror and they look rather enticing.

 

I have to take note and be careful with my disposition lest I send out the wrong signals (or maybe the right ones)🤭

 

If they keep growing out, I won't have need to experiment on those magnetic falsies I bought. The amount of time it took to wash out the liner that came with it that ended in one eye...🥴

 

 

 

 

 

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Sensei Mark came to the front of the room, before the big American and Japanese flags. Between them was a picture.  "I am honored to introduce to you Sensei Bob.  He is a second Dan black belt.  He has actually beaten me in tournaments.  I have known him through tournaments.  You will listen to him as you listen to me.   Sensei Bob, take the class. The two sensei bowed to each other.  Sensei Bob pointed out that Sensei Mark had beaten him, as well. Taylor was sort of standing against the back wall, scrunched up, a mouse in her crisp new beltless gi.  Her t-shirt was off white underneath it and she was hoping no one would notice. "I am Sensei Mark. You are Taylor." "Yes, sensei!" she stood at attention and shouted it. He laughed.  "This is not Cobra Kai and we are not in a Karate Kind movie.  You do that here only between bows.  Bob tells me you are a complete beginner." "That is an understatement." "Here, let me fix your gi."  She had it on a little incorrectly.  She drew back. "What's the matter?" "I am pretty touchy." "Okay.  Untie the straps in front and tie them the other way, like mine." "I don't have a belt." "There. That is right. You will get a belt after three months and passing tests on kata, kumite and karate knowledge." "I don't know what that is." "And we touch a lot here.  Not romantically. You see how Sensei Bob is going around and adjusting people's stances and arm locations." "Yes, I see that." No enthusiasm. "You are Sensei Bob's girl, right?" "Yes.  What is important to him is important to me, so here I am."  He wished her well and told her to go see Margie, who handled registration at the little table. "Hi, I heard about you." Margie began. "What does that mean?" "It means we treat everyone here with respect.  That was the wrong way to start." "I'll say. Try again." "Good morning. How can I help you?" "I want to register for the beginner class." "You are Taylor, right?" "Right." "Sensei Bob paid for your lesson today." He would. She gave name, address, age, height, weight, and they came to gender. Margie asked it twice. "Put down female." "The only other choice is male." "Then that is it." "Earlier I was thinking about tournaments, which are big here. The rules are that boys fight boys and girls fight girls - there are Men's and Women's Divisions.  I know you look like a woman, but they go by the birth certificate." This was awkward.  Really awkward.  Down at the other end of the room they were moving in unison when Bob said HAI!, turning, punching, kicking, etc. "I don't plan to go to tournaments.  One step at a time, shall we?" "Okay.  And I meant it when I said respect.  We bow to each other.  You will see. As a sign of honoring other people." Margie bowed slightly, sitting down.  Taylor returned the bow and smiled. The class moved into sparring, breaking into twos and practicing moves against each other.  Bob was moving among the pairs, adjusting positions of hands, hips, feet.  Taylor was unsure about someone touching her like that, her hips particularly.    The green belt class ended as new students came in for the beginners' class. Down at the other end the brown belt class began.  The room was large enough you could do two classes at the same time.   The other beginners, nervous, lined up at Margie's table.  People got into gis, the men in their big area and only woman in the little restroom that was for them.   Sensei Mark greeted them and showed them where to stand: on the little x's on the floor. He explained the School Code.  They would recite it at the beginning of class and they needed to memorize it for the white belt test, at which time they would, of course, receive a white belt. He explained some terms.    They warmed up with some basic, easy stretches.   They learned a kata called Taikyoku Shodan, involving blocks, punches and some movements. This was not bad.   She was now paired off with Judy.  Things were going well and this was not too bad. Judy was sixty years old and had been told to exercise by her doctor.  Taylor said her boyfriend was teaching the other class, which was impressive, and he wanted her involved.   "You remember the gedan barai - downward block?"  They did. Everyone showed him and he went around and made sure everyone had it down. "And the lunge punch?"  They did. "Now we are going to put them together. One of you will punch and the other block it. Okay?"   Taylor squared off against Judy.  Her heart was pounding.  She practiced her gedan barai as Judy practiced her lower lunge punch.  Then they faced each other. "Okay, first partner, lunge punch.  Second partner, lower block.  Slowly.  Go!" Taylor saw the punch coming at her, but instead of blocking it her eyes welled up with tears and she dropped to the floor, weeping uncontrollably. "Oh God, Oh, God, Oh God, make it stop, make it stop" she shouted to parties unseen. Fetal position, rocking back and forth. Crying hysterically. "I didn't go near her," Judy said, bewildered. "Taylor?"  this was Sensei Bob.  Both classes had stopped and were looking at her. She kept crying. "I am here, "Bob told her, not touching.  "Oh Bob you need a wife who can be a real woman to you. I am making you into a monk or something." And she continued crying at full volume. "You need someone better than me, someone who can give you kids." Everyone could hear this.  They were turning away, trying to pretend they could not hear this. "I need to get her out of here and take her." Bob said, and he and Mark bowed to each other. He scooped her up and she bawled into his shoulder.  She clung to him.  First hug ever. Death grip, more like it. "Judy, would you get her things?" "I did nothing," Judy said, and moved towards the restroom, stunned.  "Nothing." "I know what she was wearing," Margie said, and got them. "I've got a gym bag. It 's red and it says Roosters on it. Can you get it? Mark got it.  He accompanied them to the car.  Taylor was non-stop crying deeply, clinging to him for dear life. Mark unlocked the car and together they managed to pry Taylor off of him, even though it took both of them to do it.  She was in the car seat and they managed to buckle her in it. "I am going to take you to your apartment," he said. "No. Emergency room," she said. "Maybe the psych ward."  He didn't doubt it. She calmed down in a few minutes on the way. "Well, that was embarrassing." "Everyone remembers their first day of karate class." "Bob, what I love about you is your sense of humor." "I love everything about you." "Even this?" "Yes. Even this." She managed to walk into the ER.  They were both still in gis. "Karate accident?" "No. I am Taylor and I am a nut. I wear a gi all the time. I make my boyfriend wear one, too." "She had a triggered event.  She's had some difficult times." "I see. Do you you know are bleeding?" "No."  Her crotch was wet with blood and the blood was seeping down both legs. She was wheeled away. "Sir, please wait here." He did.  He had no legal right to see her right now. After a while a nurse came out and said he could come on  back. There she was in a hospital gown.  "Seems like old times." "yeah.  We gotta stop meeting like this." The nurse buzzed around and left them. "They are running tests." "I bet they are." "I got an MRI. On a Saturday morning, too."  First ever. "You rate.  But why?" "They figure some of the old scar tissue - you know, from the- from the past - ripped open and they need to see what is going on." "We know what is going on,"said a doctor, stepping in. He looked at her. "I am Doctor Michaels.  They called me in.  I just happened to be in the building and they wanted me to see this and take the case.  My specialty is Disorders of Sexual Development. But what I am seeing is little in the way of disorder.  Look at this." They looked at the image. "This is a perfectly ordinary uterus." "Uterus?" "Yes, your uterus." "What?" "That is not all.  This is a cervix, and this is a vagina." "It's blocked up." "Yes.  It looks like you had surgery to do exactly that when you were an infant.  They used to do that." "This is me?" "You." "Really?" "I imagine this takes some getting used to. "Can it be undone?" "Absolutely. I mean, I cannot guarantee it, but it is more than likely. I would like to run some tests." "And the bleeding?" "It looks like the hormones you have been taking have kicked of a regular monthly cycle. Then you did a whole bunch of exercise.  Not surprising." "What?" "I want you to come to my office next week for follow-up.  Have you ever had a genetic test of any sort?" "No." "Well, your testes - one looks at first glance more like an ovary." "Ovary. Can I have kids?" "Too soon to tell.  You look happy." She did.  "Bob, you look stunned." "I am." "Given what happened earlier today we want to keep you overnight for observation.  I understand you are a trauma victim and something triggered it." "I got a punch thrown at me in kara-tay class, is all. I am a wimp." "Well, I will let you two talk for a minute and they will come and get you shortly.  No bad news here." "They are coming to take me away, hah-hah, they are coming to take me away," Taylor chanted. "Bob, I am not done with kara-tay.  I want to at least finish a first class. I mean, you paid for it and I want you to get your money's worth." "I think I got that." "Kiss me, you fool,"  she said, and he did, with energy.        
    • April Marie
      These arrived in yesterday's mail. I'm out working in the yard today so just old clothes. I'm looking forward to wearing this t-shirt dress when the weather warms up a bit more.  
    • missyjo
      Ashley I've known busty girls who wore b nice bras tl work n such then like a sift sports bra to lounge or sleep in hugs
    • missyjo
      your nails b hair came wonderful  congratulations  enjoy
    • Willow
      The one thing about this position, if you want more hours just wait and be flexible.  I’m now working until 7:30 pm instead of 4:30.  
    • Ashley0616
      I hope your head cold goes away soon! Sorry you have to cut grass with that.   Love the new t-shirt   I love that one.    What Jeep would you want to get? That is awesome about your wife getting better!
    • Ashley0616
      Welcome Mattie! I would recommend the first step is finding a gender therapist and see if you are or aren't. Then one of the biggest steps if you are do you want to start hormone replacement therapy. The decision should be thought long and hard. There are irreversible effects. Looking forward to your next post! Take care!
    • Ashley0616
      Congratulations on being able to pick up a cancellation! I hope to hear more updates about your transition. 
    • Ashley0616
    • Ashley0616
      Getting a dog maybe next month
    • Ashley0616
      Spending time with my kids and eventually will be adopting a dog next month. 
    • KymmieL
      Well every girl needs a play toy. I just happen to have 7 of them.   My hoses finally came in. have the passenger front installed. Now trying to figure out how to do the drivers side when the tire is still on and there is no room to do it.  I'll figure sumthin out.  I is smrt.   Well have the wife home with me. She wound up falling back asleep after turning her alarm off. I woke her up at 6:20. She is due to work at 6. She decided to just call in.       MaeBe that is what this thread was started for. A chat place to share our days and thoughts for the day.   Hugs   Kymmie
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