A first step

[TJ]

I have been terrified of for most of my life of anyone finding out "my secret".  I never could envision coming out to friends and family...and basically my whole town as it wouldn't take long for such news to spread in the small town I live in.  When I reached a point where I could no longer repress things, I started hormones without any idea how I was going to handle the coming out issue.  Up until yesterday the only people I had come out to were my doctor and my therapist..then I college friend of mine posted this meme on Facebook.  You may have seen it...with a picture of a busted open closet painted rainbow inside.

 

No one belongs in the closet. But if you're safer inside, I'll guard the door.

If you ever need someone safe to come out to, I'm here. No judgment, just support and love.

If your family doesn’t support you, you are part of my family now.

 

And I thought that's about as close to an engraved invitation as I'm likely to get.  So I messaged him and came out to him and it went well.  Nothing but support and love as promised.  I guess that's one down.

TJ

[Billie75B]

@TJ I know how you feel I have been on HRT now for four months and slowly coming out, that said I have not come out to family or work yet. You find here on TP a great group that all have been down a similar rode and they offer advice and true support. I as am often reminded it is a journey not a race and you come out at the pace you are comfortable with. Now that you are on HRT enjoy the ride. 

 

Billie. 

[Audrey]

Dear @TJ, I am so happy to hear about your great conversation with your college friend! I relate well to the anxiety you are feeling around coming out especially early on in your journey. The first few times, and most especially the very first person I came out to, were fraught with anxiety, what-ifs, a sense of dread of losing people close to me, a fear of not being believed. Each positive coming out experience added to the momentum to keep moving forward and affirmed that my path was absolutely the right one. It was very slow and deliberate at first, who I felt I could trust to confide in. As I was out to more and more people, I started to actually look forward to it and eventually I lost control of the narrative because too many people knew. But I no longer feared what others would think, because I had the solid foundation from the early supporters. That was earlier this year, and now am Audrey all of the time - at home, at work, with family, with friends, and just everywhere.

I am hopeful you will find love, acceptance, and understanding on your path too! 

 

Love,

~Audrey.

[Amber76]

I too have lived in dread of being discovered. I've working myself up to reveal that very secret to the person closest to me. Thank you for sharing your post.

[RickPressman]

I find it courageous that so many people have decided to come out and live as the gender that they affirm they are.  I worked in printing, business forms and checks mostly and I could not imagine coming out to anyone other than to being a Dallas Cowboys

Fan (How about them Cowboys-NFC East Champs).  Printing is a high pressure, smelly business filled with men who think a woman place is anywhere but out in the printing area.  I have plenty of injuries and scars from my 40 years in the business including my hearing.  I have been retired almost 10 years now and I still have trouble imagining being a man and telling my work friends that I wanted to become a woman.  As I move forward I hope that should I make a gender change statement that I can face it with courage like you all have before me.  I salute you!

[JoniSteph]

Ladies, you can do it. I am in my 7th decade and I had come out to family and friends a year ago. I started HRT early October '21, came out full time, and applied for name and gender change. If I am going to do this, then now is the time. Kids are grown and on their own so now is my time. I live alone so no one else to answer to.

 

What this all means is you can take what ever steps that you need, to be the person that you are inside and wants to be realized. Do your transitioning at your own pace.

 

You got this made. Lots of respect and love.

 

Big Canadian Hugs

JoniSteph