How To Answer: "What's In Your Pants?"

[Heather Nicole]

I'm only at the start of transition and haven't faced this question, but I've been collecting answers in case I need them.

 

How to answer "What's in your pants?":

 

• "Legs"
• "This is a (skirt/dress), my pants are at home"
• "My hands" (Note: Only works if you have pockets and your hands happen to be in them)
• "Rainbows!"
• "The fall of civilization"
• (pause with a confused/concerned look before replying) "...uhmm...I am..." (wave and continue to look worried for their mental state)
• "A 38 page dissertation on the impact of existentialism on the economics of ancient Rome" (or anything similar) "Wanna read it?"
• "Cotton fibers"
• "Capital One!" (Warning: May not work outside the US, or with people who never watched broadcast TV. May imply to the listener you don't know the difference between "wallet" and "pants". Use with caution.)

 

And perhaps my personal favorite:

• "Justice!"

 

(Not my comic, found it on the internet:)

(Note, I edited the original image to remove a derogatory remark I consider extremely inappropriate.)

 

 

[Heather Nicole]

For anyone who doesn't get the "Capital One" reference:

 

 

It was a whole series, all with the same slogan.

 

[Carolyn Marie]

Good answers, Heather.  I enjoyed those.  When someone asked me a similar question, I wasn't nearly so clever.  I just told them, "none of your damn business."

 

Carolyn Marie

[Heather Nicole]

19 minutes ago, Carolyn Marie said:

Good answers, Heather.  I enjoyed those.  When someone asked me a similar question, I wasn't nearly so clever.  I just told them, "none of your damn business."

 

Carolyn Marie

 

That's a very good one, too!

[Sally Stone]

We can't forget the classic: "Ants."  

[Charlize]

"Show me yours then i'll show mine."

 

"Just little ole Me"

 

"Is that a proposal?"

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

[Heather42]

When I am asked what's in your pants I just look at them and say, you really should buy me dinner first

[Susan R]

4 minutes ago, Heather42 said:

When I am asked what's in your pants I just look at them and say, you really should buy me dinner first

Giggles…love it! 

[Jackie C.]

4 hours ago, Heather42 said:

When I am asked what's in your pants I just look at them and say, you really should buy me dinner first

 

What's in my pants? Vengance!

 

Hugs!

[Vidanjali]

"yo mama"   Ew!! Lol! 

[KayC]

On 1/27/2022 at 12:06 PM, Heather Nicole said:

"The fall of civilization"

I think this is my favorite.  Thank you for sharing @Heather Nicole

[Guest]

I look forward to the day when I can honestly say that I have holes in my pants.

[Heather Nicole]

Lot of good answers!

[JennaLSinclair]

Usually my insulin pump, the belt clip broke off.

[Sol]

I've got it!

In my pants is my phone, twenty dollars and a crumpled straw wrapper. If you have stuff in your pockets, just say exactly what's in there. 

You can totally omit money, though.

[Russ Fenrisson]

Good responses here!

 

I hope to never have such an encounter, but if it did happen to me, I'd probably reply with squirrels. Hopefully the other party would have seen Phineas and Ferb to get it.

[WillowA113]

3 hours ago, Russ Fenrisson said:

Good responses here!

 

I hope to never have such an encounter, but if it did happen to me, I'd probably reply with squirrels. Hopefully the other party would have seen Phineas and Ferb to get it.

I was scrolling through here, hoping the joke wasn’t taken so I could say it first. Oh well… 

[Kasumi63]

“Take me out to dinner, and you might find out.”

[awkward-yet-sweet]

"Pants?  Dear God.  I forgot to take those off." 

 

or, for the belligerent types...

 

"My pistol.  Because my husband told me it wasn't civilized to bite people anymore." 

[Russ Fenrisson]

@WillowA113 I'm sorry. I couldn't think of anything else on the spot.

@Kasumi63 Wow! That one's great too!

@awkward-yet-sweet That one's funny too. Yeah, it's too bad you can't bite people anymore. 

[Hannah Renee]

"It sure as hell ain't you!"

[Russ Fenrisson]

@Hannah Renee  That really takes the cake!

[JJ Orange]

I always thought of saying "Ask your mom/dad " or saying "I am not ready for such a commitment"

[Abirdnerd]

[ZaiynXavier]

4 hours ago, Abirdnerd said: